by Kevin Gordon
Rhonva. Every once in a while he would think on his friend who had suddenly disappeared. Kolob knew Rhonva would leave for several cas at a time, once in a while, on little or no notice, so he wasn’t too worried, but he did want to share his good fortune with someone else, nest another’s thoughts like Rhonva’s. And as Kolob sat down next to Nahlai, in his suite, carefully handing her a drink, he asked if she wanted anything else, and that was when she pulled him on top of her. It was a difficult balancing act, making out with her on the sofa, not knowing if now was the time to undress her, to let his hands explore places he had only seen and dreamt of. Luckily her hands guided his, and in moments, her clothes were off.
In the virt-lives, everything went so fast—one moment a couple would be on a sofa, the next he would be inside her, and she would be moaning, both bodies writhing in the throes of passion. But Nahlai made him slow down, made him worship her with his lips and tongue. He kept glancing back at her face, to see if she was into it, or merely bored. She moaned at his touch, ground her hips into his face, but he had lived with doubt for too long, and convinced himself that she was merely acting, that she was as disappointed in him as he was in himself.
Thankfully, she turned the tables, and began to please him. He thought everything would be fine, but soon the experience of being completely naked and exposed preyed on his confidence. Though she made him feel good, doing tricks he had never even seen on a virt-life, eventually he clumsily pushed the proceedings forward.
The night became more of a chore than a climax, as she put him through difficult paces. He struggled not to get out of breath, struggled to avoid his muscles cramping. He was suddenly doing things with his body that only his mind had done before and after a while, it began to revolt.
For a few moments, in the quiet times in-between sessions of sex, he wanted to break down and cry. His own room seemed more of a prison to him, and he was bound by expectations he couldn’t even guess at. She seemed to tolerate him, accommodated his pleasure. He was satisfied—he never had a night like this, feeling the warm, soft touch of a woman under him, over him, lying beside him. But if there was one expression he knew well, it was that of tolerance. So many people had tolerated him through his life; his mediocrity, his shyness, his indecisiveness. And that was the look he saw on her face, punctuated by sighs of boredom. He felt like crying, but was too ashamed in front of her. Rhonva’s words seemed to echo in his ear, as he regarded the half-naked divine creature lying in front of him. In those moments, he fully understood what Rhonva was trying to cast to him. He felt utterly out of place next to her, and wished he could have been with a woman much less experienced, a woman that didn’t have so many before him to judge him against. At the outside of his consciousness he could even hear the voices cackling, roaring with laughter in the darkness, waiting for her to leave, so they could molest him.
But the night wore on, and she played with him some more, and his anxiety succumbed to her infectious joy. She seemed to divine his mood, and went slower, doing more of the work, even making him laugh as she tried to please him. Eventually Kolob let down his guard, and finally felt comfortable in her arms. They sexed one more time, a few droas before the mitter was to activate, and for the first time he thoroughly enjoyed it, finally falling off into a deep sleep afterwards, laughing at himself, proud that he was able to see the night through.
Nahlai awoke in the morning, smiling beneath half-opened eyes, her breasts lying lazily on her tanned chest. She yawned, and saw Kolob sitting up, the new mitterlight washing over his face.
^What are you doing up?^ she asked, a little surprised. ^I would’ve thought you’d be all worn out. Maybe I underestimated you . . .^ Giggling, Nahlai rose, naked in the full mitterlight, stretching out her lean, muscular form.
This must be what it feels like to wake on topside, thought Kolob.
She stretched, delicate lines rippling through her back, denoting muscles earned with long and hard training. Kolob watched her sit back down, running her hands along her long, sinuous legs. They were a beautiful bronze, maybe a little darker then bronze, tinged with a slight reddish hue. The red within bloomed as she caressed her legs, moisture secreted from within her skin. She did this for several mroas, coaxing the moisture out of her skin, running it along the length of her legs, down to her feet. She massaged her ankles, rubbing out a small dry spot, her skin glistening in the light.
^If there’s one thing I hate, it’s dry skin. I have a mental correction, so my skin will produce more moisture. But it always needs a little encouragement to do its job.^ She kneaded her thighs, then let out another deep yawn. ^So, what do you usually do in the mornings?^
^Before I met you?^
^Yes!^ she laughed, wrapping her arms around him, kissing him softly on his neck. ^Before me.^
^Usually I met with Rhonva, before I’d go to work.^
^Oh yes—that man who you were with when we were trapped?^
^Yeah.^ Kolob sat down, feeling sentimental, absently looking out the window at the mitterlight. Nahlai came over, and sat across from him.
^You shouldn’t feel awkward, or disappointed in yourself, Kolob.^
^You sensed my thoughts?^
^Yes. I’ll bet normally you’re a tough one, but you’re not used to this kind of intimacy.^ She kissed him along his shoulder. ^I didn’t look too much, but I just wanted you to know, I was happy to be with you. I know you’ll only get better.^
^Thank you for being so . . . understanding.^
^I only wish someone was as understanding my first time.^
^What happened?^
^I’d . . . rather not cast about it.^ She smiled, something genuine and sweet, that melted Kolob’s heart. He looked into a face he only just knew, but one full of a warmth and compassion he had never experienced. He kissed her, and for a moment, couldn’t nest any cast, any thoughts. There was just him, and her.
^Well, we better get dressed. We both have work to go to.^
^I suppose so,^ sighed Kolob, a little relieved the night was done, yet dreading her absence. ^Off to the editing booth for you?^
^Yes. Maybe someroa you’ll come by, and I’ll show you what I do?^
^I’d like that.^
Nahlai started to dress, slipping into her simple blue pants, smiling as Kolob watched her every move.
^You remember our talk about the TELREC?^
Kolob focused on her face again. ^Yeah, and the Cuhli-pra?^
^Yes. I said I would introduce you to some of my friends.^
^Oh, yeah.^ Kolob began to feel anxious. ^Did you still want to do that?^
Nahlai finished putting on her blouse, and walked over to him, slipping her arm in his.
^Don’t worry, they’re good people, just with different opinions. And I think you need to nest some different thoughts, see through a different perspective. These are people who have studied history with great detail, people who watch every move the TELREC make.^
^Why is this so important to you?^ he asked, feeling the good times were coming to an end. ^And them?^
^The TELREC have done an amazing job of keeping Novan’s focused on pleasure,^ cast Nahlai quickly. ^They have done it by pushing aside any thought of rebellion, of doubt. Those that show concern, or suspicion, are either eliminated or re-assigned to a place where their views are not welcome. I have cast this before, Kolob; this is a crucial time in our history. This is the most important time, a point that should not be allowed to be only for the TELREC. There must be involvement from every ordinary Novan citizen. If not, we risk total marginalization of non-TELREC concerns. We risk obsolescence. There are so many groups over Novan that would rise and fight the TELREC if it came to it. You must choose a side, Kolob. You must stand up, and be counted. There is so much in you you’ve yet to discover, my sweet. This is one step on that journey—maybe it will fire a passion within you. There are so many wrongs the TELREC have committed, I am sure you will feel differently after this meeting.^
^I’ve never noticed dissension o
n the cast-net. I know I’m not on as much as the ordinary person, but I never sensed any of what you’re casting about.^
^Examine the cast-net, when you can. Nest the short news clips between shows. You will nest short sentences about sabotage, riots, even bickering within the Leviathan. Much is going on, Kolob. Have you ever nest of the Iganinagi? They were quite active, until recently.^
^You mean those people who beheaded children?^
^Yes. Their methods were questionable, but they were the largest and most organized of that element. There are others, equally passionate, that will not use such destructive methods. But you nest little of them. There are so many people wrapped up in experiencing virt-lives, that if Novan lost twenty-five percent of her population, it would take dcas, or a full cas for anyone to notice. Do you know how many people don’t even know there was an AG collapse?^
^That was the biggest disaster in a thousand cas!^ he cried.
^I know. But outside of this province, no one knows about it. It took up only a couple of sentences on a normal broadcast.^
Kolob sat down, and began to think.
Sometimes she casts as if she didn’t live here, as if she wasn’t a Novan. Kolob buried that doubt deep in his mind, so terrible it was to think on. I wish Rhonva was here—he always knew about these things. I wonder where he is—I’m surprised he hasn’t contacted me.
His thoughts
