Wherever You Go

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Wherever You Go Page 12

by Tracie Peterson


  “I thought perhaps I’d misunderstood your directions,” Chris explained. “I must say, you ladies are quite the spectacle. You brighten the day.”

  “Thanks to my uncle and Jason, we have an entirely new wardrobe,” Lizzy declared. “In fact, I’ve seen nothing of my other clothing.”

  “It’s safely packed in storage,” Jason assured her. “You’ll have everything returned to you when we reach my father’s estate.”

  “Personally, I was glad for a new suit,” Oliver said, patting Chris on the back. “How did you sleep?”

  “Quite well, thank you.” Chris looked at Mary. “I hope you passed the night as well.”

  “I did. I’ve never slept in anything quite as plush as that bed,” Mary admitted. “I found it hard to leave this morning.”

  Chris chuckled and took the chair on her right, while Jason took a seat to Lizzy’s right and Oliver chose her left. The table had been elegantly prepared for six, which begged Oliver’s explanation of Ella’s illness.

  “I’m sure she’ll be able to join us soon,” he said. “Hopefully for supper.”

  “I hope so,” Chris replied.

  Breakfast was a veritable feast, and before Mary could scarcely approve or disapprove one dish, a servant appeared with another. By the time the staff had made their rounds, Mary had eaten grilled codfish fillets in parsley butter, basted eggs, steamed figs in syrup, and hot croissants. It was unlike any breakfast she’d ever had in Kansas.

  The conversation was casual and refreshing. Jason kept to the topic of London and his father’s estate, while the others marveled at the ship’s furnishings and food. Mary was glad to have Chris at her side.

  “Our estate is just outside London,” Jason explained, “but we also have a flat in town. Part of the time we’ll stay at the apartments in London to avoid the trip back and forth, but when there is more than a day’s rest between acts, we will be at the estate. It’s much more relaxing there, and I think you’ll agree that rest is important.”

  “Of course,” Oliver agreed.

  “Where will the horses be kept?” Lizzy asked.

  Jason gave her a warm smile. “We have arranged beautiful stalls at Earls Court. I think you’ll be very pleased. There is also a large park not far away where they can be exercised, as well as the exhibition hall itself, if the weather is bad.”

  Lizzy picked up a knife to butter her toast. “I’ll want to be near them.”

  “My father will no doubt have arranged everything perfectly, so you needn’t worry,” Jason replied.

  The conversation continued, but Mary was far more interested in Chris than anything Jason had to say. While the others were caught up in the details of the country estate, Mary leaned closer to Chris.

  “I wondered if maybe later you would be willing to explore the ship with me,” she said in a whisper.

  He gave her a casual smile, only the left side of his lips rising. It made him look so appealing, and Mary felt her heart skip a beat.

  “I’d be honored, Mary. I find ships fascinating.”

  “I sometimes wonder what it would have been like aboard one of the great clipper ships with all those sails,” Mary admitted. “Having grown up landlocked, I rarely heard anything about ocean travel and ships. But once, when we were performing in Boston, I saw a large clipper ship in the harbor. She was just setting sail, and it was one of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen.”

  “I can imagine,” Chris replied, smiling. He seemed more like his old self. “I’ve been on smaller sailing ships, but never the truly great clippers.”

  “I’m not sure you heard me, Mary and Chris,” Jason interrupted, “but I was just telling the others that there will be a welcoming party at my father’s estate on our first night there. He’s invited all of his important friends. Some are noblemen and others are politically connected. All will be useful to us, especially in planning for next year.”

  “I suppose that’s why you bought us all those fancy clothes.” Mary fixed Jason with a smile. “And they are lovely.”

  “We felt you deserved them,” Oliver interjected. “We want to impress London’s society, after all.”

  “I’m sure their performance will go much further toward impressing than will their outfits,” Chris countered. “After all, you can put an expensive dress on any woman, but these ladies are able to do things that few others can even dream of.” He gave Mary a wink, then refocused on his breakfast.

  “I agree,” Jason said, looking put out by Chris’s comment. “But what one wears is important in my society. I wouldn’t want any of our beautiful ladies embarrassed.”

  “Nor would you want to be embarrassed,” Mary said, smiling. “I’m sure that’s even more important, since London is your town.”

  Jason was clearly uncomfortable with the way the conversation had gone. He fell silent, and gradually the topic turned to the horses and Lizzy’s concerns for them while traveling by sea.

  “I would like to check on them after breakfast,” she declared.

  “That would hardly be appropriate,” Jason said, shaking his head. “Mr. DeShazer and Mr. Hopkins will be able to see to them and let you know if they are distressed.”

  Lizzy nodded. “I’m sure that’s true, but I still intend to check on them myself.”

  Mary almost laughed at the look on Jason’s face, but she didn’t want to cause a bigger scene. It was gratifying enough to see Lizzy put him in his place.

  “Are you enjoying ocean travel?” Chris asked as he escorted Mary around the sun deck.

  “I’m fascinated by it,” she admitted. “I find even the uncertainty of my steps captivating. It reminds me of watching a drunk man try to navigate from room to room.” She giggled. “I have to admit, I’m grateful for the railing when things get rough.”

  Chris chuckled. “I promise to be here as well. I can’t have you falling all over the deck, now, can I?”

  Mary stopped and turned to face him. “I’m here for you as well. I hope you realize there’s nothing you can’t talk to me about.”

  He frowned. “Why do you suppose I need to talk about something?”

  “Well, you said the past troubles you and that you can’t talk about some of those things.”

  “Exactly. I can’t talk about them.” His tone grew reserved. “Shall we continue our walk?”

  Mary realized the matter was closed to discussion, but she’d never been easily deterred. She’d find a way to get him to trust her. Maybe the simplest would be to ignore his offense and just talk about herself. Sooner or later he’d have no choice but to join in.

  “When I was a little girl, I used to climb up into the barn’s loft. There was a big door up there through which Opa hauled hay bales with a pulley. He’d hook the bales onto the pulley by the wire and then hoist them up with a rope by hand, and someone would be up there to pull them inside and stack them for the winter. I used to climb up there and pretend I was on a big ship looking out at the ocean, and when the wheat was thick and tall, I could almost pretend it was water waving in the wind.” She turned her gaze back to the ocean. “Of course, the two look very different, but as a little girl, I didn’t know any better.”

  “It sounds like you had a very creative imagination.” His words were still clipped and edgy.

  “I did. Of course, my father helped with that. When he came home from traveling with the wild west show, he was always full of stories to entertain August and me. Kate was too little to appreciate his stories.” She moved along the rail with the fall and rise of the ocean. She had what Sarah the maid said were her “sea legs” and found the fresh salt air invigorating. “I suppose since father was participating in a show that re-created so many imaginative things, it was easy for him to re-create it for us. Sometimes he pretended to be a cavalryman, and other times he was a buffalo hunter on the plains. He had some really good friends among the Indians in the show. I even met a few of them.”

  “I did too, as you might recall. I probably even m
et your father.”

  “No, he died in 1885. You were no doubt living with your grandmother in London then.”

  “Yes.”

  Chris didn’t bother to elaborate, and Mary knew it was senseless to press for more. He had buried his past deep. He had hidden it away and covered it with years of pain and sorrow and had no intention of ever allowing it to see the light of day again.

  “I’m glad for my memories of my father. You see, I don’t remember much of anything about my mother. Sometimes I catch a whiff of a scent and it makes me think of her, so I have to wonder if she wore that scent.” Mary stopped as they reached the place where they’d started, and braved the question. “Do you remember your mother?”

  “Some. She was very loving and very gentle.” He stopped abruptly, as if he’d said too much.

  Mary saved him the need to once again make clear that the past wasn’t up for discussion. “Well, thank you for walking with me. I had no idea this ship was so big. I think I’ll go take a rest now before lunch.”

  It was the hardest thing in the world to walk away. She wanted nothing more than to stay and demand answers . . . or at least coax them. How was she supposed to earn his trust and confidence when he was determined never to give them?

  Eight days later, the troupe was luxuriously settled on the Adler estate just outside of London. Lizzy had to admit that much attention had been given to each person’s needs and no one could find the slightest thing to complain about.

  “I’m sorry we don’t have an indoor arena,” Jason offered as they stood talking to the Adler’s party guests.

  Lizzy gave a gracious smile. “It’s unimportant. You’ve provided so much that I couldn’t possibly ask for more.”

  An older woman put a lorgnette to her eyes and gave Lizzy a once-over. “I am told you do tricks on horseback.”

  “Yes. I am a trick rider. I have been since I was a little girl.”

  “I say, that must have worried your parents considerably.”

  Lizzy chuckled. “No, not exactly. My father was my teacher.”

  “The entire Brookstone family is involved in wild west shows,” Jason offered. “Very talented people. Now, if you’ll excuse us, I must introduce Miss Brookstone to my uncle.”

  He took hold of Lizzy possessively and led her across the room to where a much older man stood arguing with Jason’s father, Henry Adler.

  “Marcus, you won’t convince me to give you any more money, so don’t embarrass yourself by asking,” Mr. Adler was saying.

  Lizzy pretended she hadn’t heard a word. “Mr. Adler, thank you for the lovely party.”

  Jason didn’t give his father time to respond. “Uncle Marcus, I want you to meet Miss Brookstone, the star performer of the Brookstone Wild West Extravaganza. She’s become quite special to me.”

  The older man with muttonchop whiskers and dull blue eyes looked at her as if she were something he’d picked up on the bottom of his shoes. “We were having a rather important conversation,” he replied, finally fixing his gaze on Jason. “If you’ll excuse us.” He took Henry Adler’s arm and pulled him toward the door of an adjoining room.

  “I must apologize. My uncle can be quite rude. He’s no doubt trying to entice my father into loaning him money.”

  Lizzy shook her head. “But he’s an earl. Surely he must be rich.”

  Jason laughed. “You will learn that there are many titled people in this room who have less money than your family. A lot less. Having a title doesn’t guarantee having money. My uncle married well enough, but the earldom was already impoverished, and a great deal of money went into making improvements to the estate. Especially the house.”

  Lizzy let him walk her out into the gardens, where lights had been strewn and a small group of musicians played in contrast to those performing in the house.

  “My father always knew he’d have to marry into money and help restore the family fortune before he could focus on making his own.”

  “That must have been hard for him. I mean, finding a way to make a great deal of money is hard enough, but having then to turn it over to your father or brother rather than benefit your own dreams . . . Well, I would think it could make a person bitter.”

  “It was expected of him, and he knew that from a young age. He knew he needed to marry a woman with a lot of money, and here in England that wasn’t likely, since he couldn’t return the favor in kind and give his wife a titled position.”

  “So he went wife hunting in America,” Lizzy stated rather than questioned. “And married for money rather than love.”

  “He did exactly that, but love grew. My father and mother are happily matched, and Father has been far more successful than any of my uncles.”

  “That must be especially hard on your uncle who inherited the title.”

  “People come to Uncle Marcus all the time, asking him to invest in one thing or another. Because of the way the family has managed things, people naturally presume he is successfully wealthy, but nothing could be further from the truth. He doesn’t understand the first thing about . . . well, much of anything. Father had to advise him regarding the estate and how to modernize it and make it beneficial to the family. Father had to explain to him about the proper investments and what would be good for the future and what was no longer wise to hold on to. Of course, in this country, it’s normal to hold on to the past.”

  Lizzy nodded, grateful that the conversation was about his family rather than his feelings for her. But she had come out here with him in the hope of convincing him to stop his attempts to woo her away from Wesley. She wasn’t at all sure, however, how to bring up the matter without having to deal with his adoration.

  Still trying to figure that out, Lizzy posed what she hoped was a neutral question. “Are your father and uncle otherwise close?”

  Jason frowned. “What do you mean?”

  “Well, my uncle and father were the best of friends. We all lived together in Montana, and Uncle Oliver is like a second father to me. Are your father and his brothers close like that, or is this issue of money the only thing that brings them together?”

  “Ah, yes.” Jason nodded. “Mostly it’s the money. My grandfather was a cold and indifferent man. He sent all his boys to different boarding schools. Didn’t want them together, lest they conspire against him.”

  “How terrible. That’s no way to have a family.”

  “I’m afraid my grandfather wasn’t all that concerned with family. The name and the estate were what mattered. His standing with his peers and the royal house were far more important than whether his family loved him—or each other, for that matter.”

  “So you’re not close to any of them?” How very sad it would be to grow up without the love of family.

  “Not really. I’m not even that close to my sisters.”

  “Sisters? I didn’t know you had sisters.”

  “I’m the eldest of four children and the only son. My sisters are married and live in various places. As my father’s only son, it is his deepest desire that I follow in his footsteps and continue to expand his fortune. And since it’s his fortune I will one day inherit, I am motivated to do as he wishes.”

  “So making more money is what he wishes of you?”

  “That and settling down with the proper wife.” He stepped closer and took her gloved hand.

  Lizzy pulled her hand away. “I would remind you that I’m engaged to Wesley.”

  “But that doesn’t mean I might not have a chance to win you for myself. You aren’t yet married, and many a woman realizes she is improperly matched before she takes her vows. That could be said for you.”

  She shook her head. So much for worrying about how to introduce the topic. “No. It can’t be said for me, because it isn’t true. I’ve loved Wes for a very long time, and while I admire you, I do not love you.”

  Several other partygoers strolled through the gardens. They murmured hello and moved on before Jason continued.

  “Lizzy, you
haven’t even given me a chance. Let me try to convince you. Spend time with me and let me escort you around London. I know I can make you love me.”

  She frowned. “Why would anyone want a love that had to be forced? I’m sorry, Jason, but I can’t betray Wes. My love for him runs too deep. He’s as much a part of me as the air I breathe.”

  “I think you’re afraid to know the truth,” Jason countered. “You’ve never even attempted to fall in love with another. I think you’re afraid of what that outcome might be.”

  Lizzy looked at him for a moment. She could see that he was fully convinced he was right. “You’re entitled to your opinion, Jason, but you are very wrong. You see, Wesley was married once before, and as a Christian woman, I knew that I had to let go of my love for him. Since I couldn’t be a good Christian and covet another woman’s husband, I did what I could to turn my attentions elsewhere, but no one interested me.”

  “You hadn’t yet met me. I believe we’re destined to be together. Perhaps since you’re so certain that God ordains every step you take, you could say that He hadn’t yet brought us together, and so He was saving you for me.”

  “I could say that, but it wouldn’t be true. When Wesley was married, I focused on anything and everything else in order to be free of my feelings for him. I learned more daring tricks and sought more adventurous routines. I threw myself into working, and in doing so, I got very good at what I do. However, my father and mother knew I was heartbroken and did their best to counsel me as I sought to get beyond my love for Wes. The thing was, I couldn’t get beyond it, and I believe that is because we were destined to be together.”

  “But he was in love with another.”

  “No. He married only because she was in need and he felt sorry for her. She might have met with a terrible fate had Wesley not stepped in to help her. And while I don’t think a person should marry for anything less than love, I admire what he did. It makes me love him all the more.”

  Jason looked as if he might say something, but then he shook his head. She could see how much she’d hurt him, but lying and giving false hope would have been crueler.

 

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