by Lorin Grace
Mandy bounced Joy on her hip. “I didn’t hear anyone ask. Speaking of which—has anyone heard from Araceli?”
“Not this week. They were going down to Haiti with a fall group of homeschooling families. Connections can be so spotty, so I don’t think she even tries to text or email us anymore when she is there.” Tessa sat down at the old Formica-topped kitchen table. “Did you finish everything you need to at the theater?”
Mandy nodded. “Yes, the world premiere of Hearthfire’s Christmas movie will be shown on November 2, with bonus showings the next day. Anyone with a Blue Pines address can get into the Saturday showings free. Friday night is invitation only, focusing on the locals who were also extras or had their businesses used as sets.”
“I’m still torn about if I want our first kiss to be in there or not.” Tessa blushed. Zoe couldn’t blame her. Having a first kiss, even a staged one, shown to all the world was not on her bucket list.
“I wonder how long it will be until someone figures out Hearthfire paid America’s newest billionaire fifty dollars to kiss the woman he married. I defy their writers to come up with a better story. Every news show in the country is going to want you for their feel-good Christmas spotlight.” Heads nodded at Candace’s observation.
Tessa took her empty plate to the sink. “I can’t believe no one at Hearthfire has figured out we are in the background. That’s what makes me think our kiss isn’t in there. I don’t look forward to the media buzz.”
Abbie made a face. “I never watched those morning shows before I was engaged, and after making a couple rounds of the shows with our fake-engagement-to-real-wedding thing, I refuse to watch them on principle. I tried to extract a promise from Preston that we would never have to do an interview again. He told me I should have put it in a prenup.”
Zoe laughed. “Like you had time in the three hours you were engaged to think of such a thing.”
“Knock, knock. Is it safe for us guys to join you?” Sean stood in the half-open doorway.
“Come on in. You can finish the cheesecake.” Tessa kissed her husband before handing him a plate.
Candace stage-whispered, “Who needs to watch the Hearthfire movie when we have the real thing right here?”
Tessa winked. “And it all started with a kiss.”
Zoe looked at Nick and couldn’t help but wonder if their story had started with a fist. Not the story she wanted to tell in years to come, but something had started.
seventeen
Nick rolled up the window between the back seat and Sebastian.
Zoe shot him a look.
Nick didn’t care. Now was as good a time as any to talk. Help was only forty-two inches away if she felt uncomfortable.
“I would like to talk, and this seemed like the best place. Privacy and a witness if you need it to feel comfortable.” It had been his mother’s suggestion.
“Like an old-fashioned chaperone?”
“Who at this moment is conveniently deaf and probably won’t blink an eye if one of us moves to the middle seat so I can finally hug you like I have wanted to since this morning.”
Zoe turned in her seat to face him better. “Why didn’t you hug me this morning?”
“I was torn. But I felt I should let you take the step if you wanted to, not because you felt you had to.”
“And now?”
“It’s still your choice.” He opened his arms, hoping she would choose to move to the center seat.
Zoe ran her thumb along the edge of the cross-body portion of her seat belt. “You know, if I accept your hug, I might cry some more.”
“I’m fine with that.” He would even take a punch in the other eye if it helped her come to terms with things and allowed her to move forward.
Zoe released the latch on her seat belt. Nick waited for her to slide across the seat to him, then circled his arms around her and held her as the tears started. Soon he felt her relax. She produced a tissue from a pocket and leaned into his side, dabbing at her tears.
“We should get the center belt on you before Sebastian yells at us over the intercom.”
Zoe reached for the belt. “He can do that?”
Nick helped her get the end into the latch. “Can and will.” He rested his arm around her shoulder as he brought her into a side embrace.
“I’ve needed this hug all day, but I didn’t dare ask.”
Nick wished he had offered sooner, but he had no idea how to balance what she needed with his own feelings. Next time Nick saw Sean, he owed him for the excellent advice. “Anytime you need a hug, you have an open invitation. No need to ask.”
She nodded against his shoulder. “Are you okay with what I told you this morning?”
“You mean do-I-want-to-find-the-TA-and-make-the-next-ten-years-of-his-life-miserable-for-what-he-did-to-you okay, or I-still-want-you-in-my-life-because-you-make-me-smile-and-laugh-more-than-anyone-I-know okay?”
Zoe pulled back so she could study his face. “You really don’t think less of me, do you?”
“Why would I?” It was a question he hadn’t anticipated.
Zoe settled back into his embrace. Nick waited for Zoe to answer as he watched the lights of the city skyline take shape.
“I don’t know, but some people do. They assume I was drunk, or did something to put myself in a vulnerable position, or that I am lying to justify having—”
He felt more than heard the tears start again. He kissed the top of her head, hoping the gesture showed his acceptance. “Then those people don’t know you.”
Zoe relaxed. She produced another tissue and wiped her eyes.
Nick watched buildings and signs pass, debating about the next questions he needed to ask. Was there any way they wouldn’t be awkward?
Nick’s heartbeat pulsed below her ear. She’d once read the safest sound in the world was a strong heartbeat—an instinct going back to what a baby heard in its mother’s womb. Zoe agreed with the article.
Suddenly his heart rate sped up. “I need to ask you something else. When I envisioned what we could do this weekend, I hoped our time together would end in a kiss. But given what happened last night, I don’t know what you feel. And I don’t want things to feel as awkward as this question or worse.”
Funny, she had thought a racing heart was more figurative than literal. Hers sped up too. “Are you asking permission?”
His heart still raced. “Not for this second, but later, if the moment is right, how will I know you are in the same place I am?”
“You mean other than the eye-to-eye-to-mouth triangle you have already done?” At least five times. Enough to have her pondering a kiss.
“What triangle?”
Zoe sat up a bit. “It is in all the movies and even some of the better cartoons. He looks into one eye, then the other, then down to her mouth, then back to the first eye. She mimics him or gives a hint of a smile. The camera pans in, and a swoon-worthy kiss follows.” She was aware she was doing it as she explained and hoped he couldn’t tell in the dim lighting.
“You say I’ve done this?”
“Have you thought about kissing me?”
Nick cleared his throat. “Possibly.”
Zoe settled back into his side. Looking at his face made the conversation more embarrassing. “Then you have done the triangle. Candace says the pattern is a natural human response.”
“Oh, so if I do the triangle thing and you smile, I can kiss you?”
“I won’t even give you a black eye. But not tonight, please. My emotions have been on overdrive all day, and right after this conversation, a kiss would be awkward.”
“Agreed. So, how about those Giants?”
Zoe smiled. “That was a subtle change of topic. I thought you were a Jets fan.”
Nick laughed. “Sorry, the
game was on TV, and it was the first thing I could think of.”
Zoe took a deep breath. “Back to the other topic for a second. I need you to know I was thinking about kissing you yesterday morning too. I really don’t know how my body or emotions might react, so if the time seems right and I push back or something, please, just–” Filled with embarrassment, she buried her face into his side.
His arm tightened around her, and after a moment, his other hand lifted her chin. “We will figure this out, and I’ll try to keep an open mind as long as you can keep an open heart.”
Zoe nodded and settled back into his arms for the rest of the ride, the smell of cinnamon and sandalwood surrounding her in her new safe place, her fears about the future slipping away.
Nick watched all the familiar buildings out the window, wishing Sebastian would drive them around the city again. Instead, he found a parking space a block away from the brownstone. “May I walk you up?”
Zoe nodded and sat up.
He put his arm back around her shoulders as they walked. “There is something you should know. I asked Colin to do everything he legally could to bury any part of the last couple years of your life on the web. I should have asked your permission, but I was more than a little angry.” After talking with his mother, he realized he had overstepped, even if it was with good intentions.
“I thought of asking Colin last year, but I didn’t want him to know, and I didn’t know him well enough to admit I needed help.”
“Sean also sent painters to clean up our mess. Do you mind if I wait while you check your apartment?” Nick didn’t want to give her a choice.
“Do you mean do I mind if you are a bit hyperprotective? No.” Zoe unlocked the front door.
Nick walked her upstairs. Other than the smell of paint, everything seemed to be in order. “Good night, Zoe. Do you want a ride back to Blue Pines tomorrow?”
“No, they are coming into the city to shop. Daniel and Preston are supposed to be here in the morning. I am not sure what they are doing. Night, Nick.” Zoe rose up on her toes.
Nick froze.
She brushed a kiss on the cheek under his good eye.
Before he could blink, she was gone. The dead bolt slid shut. He imagined her looking through the peephole and smiled. “Sweet dreams, Zoe.”
Nick jogged back down the stairs. Unlike Colin, he had found the right door out of the friend zone.
At the bottom of the stairs, he texted Sean to see if there were any plans for Saturday he could join.
—Dinner at the new house, 7 p.m. Be here at 6.
Done.
—Tessa says no more texting.
Oops. Sorry, Tessa.
When he got back in the car, he found the dividing window lowered. “My wife prepared her super-secret poultice. She swears the herbs and essential oils will decrease healing time by half. She wants us to pick it up before I drop you off. Does that suit you?”
“How bad does this one stink?”
“About the same as the rest of them.”
Nick had been subject to several of Sebastian’s wife’s cures over the years. They all worked, but they all smelled like a roadkill skunk.
“Then it will work. Let’s go.” The smell would be worth getting the dark-purple bruise to disappear, if only so Zoe could stop wincing.
eighteen
Nick’s Monday morning text came only seconds after her alarm went off.
—I’m a text away if you need me today. “You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” —Christopher Robin
You know that quote is only in the movie, not the book, right?
—Yes, but it still fits.
I’ll need it today. A soak in the old-fashioned claw-foot tub with a lavender bath bomb and a drop of cinnamon oil on her pillow had kept the old nightmares away, but she still did not sleep soundly. Her mind kept running through what-ifs. The pillow hadn’t quite smelled enough like Nick to relax her.
—Sebastian wants to drive you to work.
Tell him thanks, but I will take the subway. I need to start today off normally.
—Dinner with me tonight?
Pick me up from work?
—What about normal?
I don’t know that I need to end my day with my usual ride home. If things went poorly at work, she didn’t want to be on the subway.
—5:30?
Yes. I’ll text you if that changes.
Zoe took extra care dressing for work. All four of her friends had bought her new blouses, none of them even remotely resembling the one that was destroyed. She wore the one Candace chose. Today she needed all the strength she could channel from her cousin, who, after years of dealing with cancer, was the strongest person she knew.
On the subway, Zoe couldn’t bring herself to read the news. She settled on an ebook instead.
James got on at his stop and found a spot next to her.
Zoe took a breath. So it begins.
“How are you doing?” James swayed near her with the movement of the train.
“I had a good weekend. And you?”
“I’m not sure yet. Gina will be back from LA today. If Adrian and Shayne make her the new art director, I’ll be as happy as a kid with a new puppy.”
Zoe studied his face. “That is pretty happy.”
“I think almost everyone is happy.”
“Almost?”
“April is having a tough time. Dodd mentored her. He did a lot of things to make her work environment accessible beyond ADA requirements. But then, you are her friend.”
Zoe nodded. Above them, the voice announced their stop. She followed James out of the subway. He stopped at the corner coffee shop. Zoe decided to wait for him rather than continue on her own. James handed her a cup. “And I don’t even have a job for you today.”
“So this is just because?”
“Because today will be hard and you need a good start.”
Zoe took a sip. “Thanks.”
She went through the first five minutes of her Monday as normally as possible. April didn’t say hello, and the floor seemed quieter than normal. She checked her tablet. No one seemed to need her, so she pulled up one of her projects and started to work. The tablet pinged.
Accept 9:30 meeting with Adrian Scott? Location: his office.
She clicked the Accept button. There wasn’t much of a choice. In the ten minutes she’d worked, she’d changed the font twice and the size of a photo once. She went up to the top floor and presented herself to Adrian’s office assistant.
“Go on in, Miss Wilson. They are ready.”
They? She opened the door to find Adrian Scott, Shayne Ricks, and Maurene, the PR woman from the 9/11 museum dedication. There was another man she didn’t recognize.
Adrian stood. “Have a seat, Zoe. This isn’t as imposing as it looks. You know Shayne. And I believe you met Maurene from PR. This is Stirling, head of Human Resources.”
Zoe sat in the chair Adrian indicated.
He sat as well. “We have been looking at our policies over the weekend. We also contacted all of the female employees who left our employ suddenly in the last few years.”
“Two of them have also said they were assaulted by Mr. Dodd but were too afraid to come forward. Your bravery gave them the courage,” said Shayne. “What we don’t understand is why no one reported or complained. There was the one report six months ago by an employee for inappropriate comments. Mr. Dodd was reprimanded and sent to a sensitivity training. How did we miss this?” She turned to Zoe.
“In hindsight, is there anything we could have done to prevent this?” asked Stirling.
Zoe thought back. “I knew Mr. Dodd wasn’t popular with some of the employees. April said som
ething bad happens to people who work late. She wasn’t specific, and given her reaction to what I told her, I don’t think she knew. She had just observed a pattern. Since so few employees talk to her socially, she relies on observation.”
Maurene tapped her pen. “Did April say anything definitive?”
“Not really. Just that she liked me and hoped I wouldn’t stay late because she had two other friends who stayed late and then quit unexpectedly.” Zoe gave a little shrug.
“I knew Dodd wasn’t admired by some of the employees. I don’t understand how we could have so colossally failed to see this side of him.” Stirling shook his head.
“Do you have any ideas about what we can do to prevent this, moving forward?” asked Maurene.
“What is your current method of reporting harassment? It occurred to me that I don’t know. The policy isn’t exactly the type of thing I’d want to be caught looking up on my tablet.”
“They come to file a complaint in the office or by email,” said Stirling.
“Is there a way to turn in an anonymous tip or report?” asked Zoe.
“No.”
“I would set up a way to call or email anonymously, then put the contact information in the bathrooms.”
Adrian leaned forward. “Why the bathrooms?”
“If someone is harassed and they want to be alone, they will go to the bathroom. And bathrooms are boring places, so the information would get read if there wasn’t an emergency.”
“We could put a complaint box in the restrooms for nonviolent harassment. It could help,” said Maurene.
Adrian checked the clock. “It is almost time for your Monday morning meeting. Shayne and I are going down too. We just need to wrap up some other items.”
“I don’t know if it helps, but you could not have prevented what happened. I do appreciate your quick actions.” Zoe left the room.
