As if to add to Willow’s bad luck, she saw Casey and his family coming out of the local grocery store. She felt that pang of jealousy when she saw how happy they were, smiling and laughing together. The feeling grew worse when Casey met Karol’s eyes. The way they looked at each other was the same way Nick and Gwen looked at each other. It was love. Something warm and sweet. It wasn’t the same as how Willow and Derek looked at each other because they didn’t love each other.
Casey glanced Willow’s way. They held each other’s gaze for a moment, but he was the one to break it. He went back to attending his family. Willow was relieved he didn’t try to talk to her. She thought about Julie and how she had welcomed her son back with open arms. That wasn’t the case with Howard. It seemed he was doing his best to actively avoid Casey. Apparently, he and Willow were the only ones unwilling to forgive.
“What’s up with that Casey guy?” Derek asked.
“I’m surprised you care,” Willow replied.
“I don’t.”
Willow changed the subject. “All of your things are at my house. Even your Fat Boy. You can thank my packmates for that.”
“Really?” Derek couldn’t hide the tone of excitement in his voice.
Willow smiled. He loved that bike. She could tell. She really wished he’d wear a helmet though.
“See for yourself,” she pointed out her driveway in the distance.
He ran past her and right up to his bike. She watched him as he inspected it, gently running his hands across its bulky metal body. There was a soft look on his face. It was a look of endearment. Relief. She hadn’t seen that look on him before.
Derek looked up at her after a moment with another new look. Gratitude. That was a look of gratitude. It faded so quickly she almost wondered if she was seeing things. His eyes, his face, his every feature was back to being hard-set, stone-like.
“Shower?” Willow asked.
Derek shrugged and joined her inside of the house. Willow gave him a quick tour. The clothes and the other meager belonging he had in his hotel room were in her guest room. She set him up with a towel and ushered him into the guest bathroom. After waking up the way he had, she knew a shower would feel good.
Why had he woken up like that?
Willow lay down on the wood-framed sofa in her living room and closed her eyes as she listened to the hypnotic sound of water running. She often imagined being in the shower with a mate who loved her unconditionally. She was sure it would feel amazing. But it wasn’t her shower she really wanted to share with her Fated Mate who loved her unconditionally. It was her Jacuzzi. Yeah, she had a pretty spectacular master bathroom. She could already feel the warm water jets and the smooth, slippery touch of her mate’s skin. They’d make love of course, but they’d also do simple things like massage each other’s backs.
She wanted that kind of mate so bad. The perfect match.
Willow’s experience with Derek in his hotel room wasn’t bad. It was actually pretty good—until the whole claiming bite thing—but it was far from a perfect match. It was far from what Willow dreamed her Fated Mate making love to her would feel.
She opened her eyes again when the sound of the water running stopped. Derek popped into the living room a few minutes later, wearing a pair of jeans and nothing else. Willow stared at him, drinking in the defined grooves of his muscles. Well, she couldn’t have asked for a sexier mate. That was for sure. Derek was get-on-your-knees-and-beg kind of sexy. She had never been attracted to anyone the way she was attracted to him.
“Goddamn it,” he said, his voice breathy. Willow caught his eyes, that smoldering need for her clearly visible in them. “If you don’t want any messing around, princess, you need to stop smelling so ready for me all the fucking time.”
Willow growled. “I thought you didn’t fuck the same woman twice.”
Derek blinked, breaking their shared heated look. “Got anything to eat around here?”
She thought about telling him to go raid the fridge for his own goddamn food but decided she didn’t want him ransacking her house. He was apparently a thief after all. How could she trust him? Why did she think having him stay with her was a good idea?
“Yeah, I’ll get you some fucking food, my liege,” she said. She got off the couch and gave him an overly showy bow.
She stormed out of the room and into the kitchen, grabbing bacon and eggs out of the fridge as she set to work on making a late breakfast. Brunch. She was making brunch.
Fuck.
She didn’t know how this was ever going to work out.
Chapter 9
SHE WAS ON A rampage. Derek had left for a moment. He went to the guest room to put on a shirt and to stay away from Willow for a bit. But the smell of bacon and eggs cooking eventually coaxed him into the kitchen. He sat down at a round table, figuring he wouldn’t be in Willow’s way. She didn’t even look at him.
It was just as well. It would be better if she hated him. If she didn’t hate him, he didn’t know what he would do. She had convinced him to follow her to Moonwatch and now her house. He should have taken the opportunity on their way to her house to shift and run. Willow couldn’t have overpowered him. He didn’t know why he followed her. He got distracted, seeing her reaction to Casey. He didn’t care. He really didn’t.
But what the hell was she so sad about when she looked at him?
He was likely an ex-boyfriend. That was the only explanation. Derek never set himself for that kind of failure. He would never have a girlfriend, so he’d never have the baggage or heartbreak that always went along with one. It was Willow’s own fault.
Since she wasn’t looking at him, that made it safe for him to watch her. Her curly blond hair was pulled back into a ponytail so it wouldn’t get in the way of her cooking. She was wearing a pink jacket zipped up low. She was wearing either simply a bra or a low-cut shirt underneath based on the amount of cleavage she was showing. Her boobs were fucking fantastic. Perky and big. He appreciated the view. It was her defined hips and ass that really got him going though. She walked like a queen, her long legs guiding her hips into each sway. The skin-tight jeans she was wearing weren’t helping anything. He wanted to squeeze that tight ass.
He wanted to take her again. It was against his code, but he wanted it more than he had ever wanted anything. Being near her was literally killing him. The sweet scent of her arousal was fogging up his brain.
Then he saw the mark on the back of her neck. It definitely resembled the moon, not in just its shape, but in its color too. The sight, the memory of what he had done, sobered him up. The back of his neck produced a dull burn.
He hurt her. He was a piece of shit too.
He squeezed his eyes shut, refusing to let his dream, his memories, pervade his mind. He had put all of that behind him. He wasn’t allowed to think about it anymore. He vowed that the day he had truly become a lone wolf. This was what he was.
All of this crazy need for Willow, this ridiculous attraction, meant nothing. Unlike her fairytale beliefs, no one was ever made for someone else. He wasn’t hers, and she wasn’t his. Their undeniable chemistry meant nothing. It was all a physical reaction. That was all it was.
Derek would be a lone wolf forever because he would never let anyone get close to him. That was why he couldn’t understand why he was here. He couldn’t understand why he had followed Willow. He couldn’t understand why he almost… wanted to know her. He was a weak bastard. It had to be because of her own interest in him. She intrigued him maybe?
He really needed to leave.
After he ate, he’d grab his Fat Boy and get the fuck out of this podunk town. Willow had made everything so much damn easier by somehow getting all of his stuff here like that. He could leave anytime he wanted.
It was strange. They said he had to stay, but they sure weren’t doing much to keep him here.
Because they didn’t have to. Willow was enough. It had to be that physical pull. It was so strong, he couldn’t think straight, so
he had stopped thinking and let Willow guide the way and keep him here. Was that possible?
The stuff about Fated Mates couldn’t be real. If it was true, he couldn’t be Willow’s Fated Mate. He fucked her hard, thinking only of himself. He wasn’t interested in pleasing her at all when they fucked. He didn’t want to give her any control. He didn’t want her to caress him. He just knew he needed to be inside of her. But then he claimed her. Hurt her…
It was all so confusing.
“Here,” Willow said as she placed a fork and a huge plate of bacon and eggs in front of him.
Derek licked his lips. “You made a ton,” he noted.
“Wolves have a big appetite.”
“True that.”
He watched her dish up her own plate—which still had a lot of food on it, but not as much as his. She stared at her plate and dug in. She was doing everything in her power not to look at him. Derek watched her eat for a moment. She was eating ravenously, but she somehow managed to keep that feminine and dainty quality of hers. A smile tugged at his lips, but he refused to let it show.
“Why are you staring at me?” Willow asked, setting down her fork. “You haven’t even tried your food.” She finally looked at him.
Derek took a bite of his food. Goddamn, it was good. Maybe he was just starving, but he was pretty sure this was the best plate of bacon and eggs he had ever had. He took another bite and hummed in contentment.
He noticed a little smile slip onto Willow’s face, but she quickly hid it. “How long have you been a loner? Did you know your parents? Were they wolves?”
Derek stopped his fork mid-air and placed it back on his plate. “Things just ended up that way. Didn’t know my dad. Mom wasn’t a wolf.” Here she was again, asking him questions. Trying to get to know him. It made him uneasy.
Willow frowned. “You’ve been alone for a long time then?”
He didn’t answer that question.
“You said your mother wasn’t a wolf. I lost my parents too.” She was sharp. “They died in a car crash of all things.” She tightened her hand into a fist. “That was why I was upset about you not wearing a helmet on your bike. I should have told you before. Sorry.”
Derek didn’t know what to say about that. Why would she care so much for his safety? He didn’t want her to care.
Willow fidgeted. “I don’t know what I’d do without my pack. It’s like having one big family there to help and support you.”
“Families are overrated,” Derek interrupted.
Willow flinched. He had hurt her again, but he was telling the truth. What did he care if he hurt her anyway? Why did he keep noticing? Why was he so aware of her despite trying his damnedest to be distant? He had been breaking hearts, stealing, and hurting people for years. No, he wasn’t the worst guy out there, but he certainly wasn’t nice.
Family was a dirty word. Love was a dirty word. None of it was real.
“My brother used to think he’d never find a mate because the Wolf was disappearing as far as anyone could tell,” Willow said. “My brother, Casey, and I were the youngest wolves any of us knew of. We figured we were the last generation or something. It was weird. Wolf shifters weren’t having kids. When they were, they were apparently wolfless. Our history keeper, Julie, told us young pups about stories of the past though. She said we used to be very close to the Moon. Pack Bonds were nearly unbreakable and the Moon gave us Fated Mates. Everyone believed we had lost those things forever—except for me, Casey, and Julie. Nick was with us too, at first.
“My dad, the Alpha of Blue Pack before Nick, set me and Casey up as mates. He thought that was how he could save the wolf. I was happy about it. I really liked Casey.” She looked down at her hands clasped together on the table. “I loved him. He made me believe he loved me too. He slept with me, he was always nice and did the sweetest things for me. But one day he showed me he had been sneaking out. Blue Pack hasn’t had much contact with humans until recently, and even still we’re pretty secluded. Casey was sneaking out to see humans, and he could have gotten in a lot of trouble for it because my pack was all about keeping the purity of the Wolf. So I didn’t tell.
“On the night he was supposed to claim me, Casey said he was leaving. He wanted to see the world outside of Moonwatch. I guess he believed his Fated Mate was out there waiting for him somewhere. Seems he was right. He just returned here after years of no one seeing or hearing from him. Now he has a family and a mate I can see he loves very much.”
She bit her lip. “Anyway, a few months before Casey came back with his Fated Mate, Nick found Gwen. We all thought she was human at first because her wolf was sleeping deep inside of her. It took longer for them to hook up than it should have since Nick was worried about her being a human and how our pack was against humans for so long. In the end, he chose Gwen and changed the pack. He claimed her, and that triggered her wolf. Since then we’ve been helping wolves like Gwen, Awakened Wolves. I asked you how long you’ve been a wolf because I figured you were one of the Awakened Wolves based on your age.
“Nick and Gwen brought magic back to us. They brought the Moon back to us. Before Nick claimed Gwen, they shared a Lunas Sigil a lot like yours and mine. The difference was, their Lunas Sigil didn’t tie them together as mates. It was this one time, ‘You saved my life and now I have to save yours,’ kind of deal. The sigil disappeared after they had both fulfilled that contract. Then the mark returned when Nick claimed Gwen, sealing them as mates. But before that, when Nick and Gwen first laid eyes on each other, they said they knew they were meant for each other. They didn’t understand it at the time, but they knew. That’s what it’s like when you find your Fated Mate.”
Willow touched the back of her neck. “I wanted Casey to be my Fated Mate. I would have been happy with him. I know I would have. When he left me that night, I decided I’d stop at nothing to find my Fated Mate too.” She caught Derek’s eye. There was a flash of amber in her own eyes, meaning her wolf was close to the surface. “Then I found you.”
Derek’s chest squeezed. His breathing was restricted. “I didn’t mean to claim you. There has to be a way to undo it. I’m not your Fated Mate.”
“Maybe you don’t think so. Maybe I’m not so sure anymore. But the Moon is,” she said quietly. “What are the odds I’d be in heat the night I first met you? Why would the Moon give us a Lunas Sigil almost right away? You keep asking if there’s a way to undo this, but I don’t know how to undo a Lunas Sigil. I know that when a male wolf claims a female, the claim can fade over time if it was an involuntary claiming or if mates fall out of love, but our mating was sealed with a Moon Mark. Whether you like it or not, as of right now, you are my mate.”
“None of this makes any sense,” Derek muttered as he folded his arms.
“Julie says the Moon must want us together for a reason.”
Derek gawked at her.
Willow shook her head and said, “Just don’t worry about it. You’ll get used to all of this wolf stuff eventually. Or not.” She eyed him. “What are you going to do now that you’ve got a shifter collector after you?”
“Hide away for a while and run to the next state to hide again. Erin will give up soon enough,” Derek replied.
“You should stay here.” She wiggled her fingers as she stared at them again. “You could see what having a pack is like.”
“Your brother doesn’t like me very much. I did just endanger your entire pack with this shifter collector shit.”
She sighed. “He’d let you stay and get off your back if I asked him to. I’m not going to force you to do anything. If you want to leave, you can go right ahead and leave. I know you don’t want to be here. Blue Pack can take care of itself. I’ll even sneak you out of here if you’re worried about someone stopping you.”
Derek scowled. He couldn’t figure this wolf out.
“Or you could spend the day with me in Blue Forest. Since you’re a city wolf, I bet you haven’t done anything like that before. Besides, runni
ng through it last night didn’t do it any justice. It’s pretty amazing, a great place to get away for a while.”
He cocked his head. “You’re not wrong. Forest running isn’t my norm.”
“Well?” She smiled. “What are you going to choose?”
The obvious and right decision was to take Willow up on her gracious offer to get him out of town if she really did mean that. His life would go back to how it had been. He’d be alone. Doing his thing. Doing exactly what he wanted to do. Living day to day with no real purpose because he wasn’t ready to die.
He couldn’t believe he was admitting it to himself, but he wanted to take Willow up on the forest suggestion. He also wanted to fuck her again, but he wasn’t doing that. No way, no how. But what would it hurt to spend a day in the forest with her? He could always leave later.
He shouldn’t do it.
“I’ll go to the forest with you,” he said. The mark on the back of his neck thrummed against his skin. It was like a gentle massage.
Willow’s brown eyes lit up, flashing amber again. He didn’t know why the hell she seemed so happy about this. They had already discussed that he wasn’t the Fated Mate she had hoped for, but she wanted to spend the day with him? She really must have believed the “Moon” had picked him for her.
Ridiculous. Poor delusional wolf.
And now he was feeding those delusions. How many more times would he hurt her before he left the nice wolf alone? She was nice. He was taking advantage of her like he did everyone. He didn’t like that thought.
They wolfed down the rest of their food, placed their dishes in the sink, and went outside. The wolves in this town seemed to like to spend their time outside. Maybe it was the weather. Derek always liked being outside in the fall. The temperature was perfect. He caught sight of that Casey guy again, Willow’s ex. His hackles were starting to rise, but he quickly told himself to calm down. He didn’t know why the fuck he felt so aggressive toward that wolf now. He hadn’t minded him last night.
Her Fierce Wolf (Marked By The Moon Book 2) Page 10
