“That’s very good,” Frau Lundschmidt said. “And now, I have something very exciting to tell all of you. We have a very important holiday coming right up. Does anyone know what that special day is?”
“Yes,” Thea raised her slender arm.
“Go on and tell us then, Thea.”
“It’s Führergeburtstag, our führer's birthday.”
“That’s right. And does anyone know the date?”
Judith raised her hand. “April twentieth.”
“Correct. And since that very special day is coming right up, our group is going to join with the boys in the Hitler Jugend for a celebration. We will have a spring dance party.”
The girls let out gasps, and some giggled. An excited buzz of whispering filled the room.
“Quiet down now, girls,” Frau Lundschmidt said, trying to be stern. Then she shook her head and smiled. “Oh well, there’s really no need to be silent. Go on and chatter; this is a very exciting celebration. But even so, you must keep your voices down. We are in someone’s home, and we must be respectful. After all, ladies, we must never forget who we are. We are superior women, Deutche maidels. The future of our beloved fatherland. So it is essential that we always show some decorum.”
Many of the girls nodded.
Hilde reached over and squeezed Gretchen’s arm gently. “I’m so happy. This will be so much fun,” she whispered.
Gretchen smiled.
It was Gretchen’s first BDM dance. Because it was a celebration for Hitler’s birthday, all the schools and businesses were closed. The girls would have the entire day to get ready. However, Gretchen was not planning to attend because she didn’t own a party dress. Her father never had enough money to spare. Until now, she hadn’t cared because she never needed one.
After the meeting ended, Hilde and Gretchen walked home together.
“You are going to really love this dance. This is only the second one I have attended, but they are so much fun,” Hilde exclaimed.
“Hilde,” Gretchen said. “I’m not going.”
“What? Why not? Of course, you’re going.”
“I can’t.”
“Tell me why.”
Gretchen hesitated. She was embarrassed. “I don’t have a party dress. I only have two dresses, and they are suitable for work and school but not for a party.”
“Is that all?” Hilde said, shaking her head. “Why don’t you come to my house and look through my closet? I know I’ll have something that will look ravishing on you. You can borrow it. You are rather slender so we might have to alter the size with a belt, but we’ll sort it all out. Don’t worry.”
“Are you sure you don’t mind?”
“Quite sure. So, you’ll come over?”
“Of course,” Gretchen said smiling at her dear friend.
“How about you come by my house tomorrow after work?”
“All right. I’ll tell my father I am going to be late coming home.”
After the girls parted, Gretchen went home, but Hilde didn’t. She took a bus five miles to the Jewish sector of town where she found a woman’s dress shop. She went inside and began to look around. A very thin, older woman with a slight hump in her back wearing an elegant tailored, black dress walked up to her.
“Can I help you, dear?” she asked.
“Oh, no thank you. I’m just looking,” Hilde answered. She selected several dresses off the rack and carried them into the dressing room.
“Well, if you need anything, just call. I’m right here, and I’d be happy to assist you.”
Hilde found it easy to steal from Jews. She’d been caught once when she took the lipstick from a Jewish shop. The owner was furious, but when Hilde threatened to tell the German police that he had molested her, he let her go without reporting the theft. The best part was that she still kept the tube of lipstick.
The shopkeeper was not watching Hilde intently, making it easy for her to put two dresses on underneath the dress she was wearing. She hung the others back on the hangers and handed them to the shopkeeper.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t find anything,” Hilde said. These Jews have been stealing from us good Germans for a very long time. So what if I get a little of it back? Hilde thought.
“Well, good luck to you. I hope you find what you’re looking for,” the shopkeeper said as she began to straighten the dresses on the hangers.
Hilde left the store and ran home. She carefully removed the price tags and hung the stolen goods on hangers. She marveled at her conquest. One dress was pale pink, and the other was pale yellow. Either one would be perfect for a spring dance. They fit Hilde, so she knew both dresses would be too big for Gretchen. Since Hilde liked both frocks equally, she decided she would let Gretchen choose first then she’d wear the other one. Once Gretchen chose her favorite, Hilde would help her add a belt at the waist to make it fit.
Sitting on her bed with her back against the wall, Hilde smiled. She was excited about the dance. Perhaps, by some miracle, with her new dress and her red lipstick, she would be able to attract Hann’s attention. She could hardly wait until the dance. It was two weeks away, and she was counting the days.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Two days after Hilde stole the dresses, she decided she also needed a fancy handbag. Carrying an old worn bag with a pretty dress would not do. She had no money, but that didn’t worry her. Since the führer had taken power, getting what she wanted or needed was easy. You just have to know how to make the best of a situation, Hilde thought smiling to herself.
She knew there was a leather shop in the Jewish neighborhood. She had walked by it several times and had seen its owner, an old shoemaker. Hilde had no doubt that she could scare him into giving her a bag by saying she would report him for trying to molest her. This tactic was working so well on the male Jewish shop owners that she was beginning to feel powerful like she could have any material thing her heart desired.
She was quite sure the old shoemaker would be no different. After all, no Jew in his right mind would risk arrest. From what she had heard, those who did suffered pure hell. And, of course, the Jew would know that the police would take the word of an Aryan girl over his. He would, no doubt, give her a bag. Perhaps she could get two—one for herself and one for Gretchen. Gretchen would surely enjoy a new bag.
Even though Hilde considered Gretchen her best friend, she would never take her along on such a mission. It wasn’t smart to trust anyone too much. Things can always go wrong. So rather than share her plans with Gretchen, she decided to handle things on her own.
After work the following day, Hilde walked to the Jewish sector of town. She turned onto the street where Dreifuss and Company, the handbag and accessory shop, was located and began to window shop. Since discovering her new scare tactic, she felt like a rich woman. I can demand anything of a male Jewish shop owner, and he would be a damn fool not to give it to me without causing a problem. She was looking for a dress store owned by a man. She didn’t want a dressy dress like the ones she’d stolen the other day but thought it would be nice to have a few new, casual frocks to wear to work.
As she sauntered down the shop-lined streets, she happened to recognize Thea’s mother. Hilde was sure it was her; she remembered her from the Bund meeting. But what was she doing in the Jewish sector of town? Hilde had to know. There might just be a secret here, one she could use to destroy Thea. Careful not to be seen she followed Thea’s mother and watched as she entered a building. The window blinds were down, but there was a small crack where Hilde could see inside. She stopped and stared through the crack. It was only a few minutes before Thea’s mother entered the room. Hilde’s mouth fell open when she saw Thea’s mother taking off her blouse. Then Thea’s mother sat down on the examining table wearing nothing but a bra and her skirt. Hilde read the sign above the storefront: Doctor Benjamin Fineberg.
Fineberg! Of course, he’s a Jew. We are in the Jewish sector of town; what else would he be? A smile came over Hilde’s face. She wa
tched the doctor lean over Thea’s mother. Did I see him kiss her? she asked herself, knowing full well that she had not but wanting to believe that she did see it. He kissed her. The Jewish doctor kissed Thea’s mother, and Thea’s mother was naked.
Hilde spoke the lie that was forming in her mind, out loud, hoping that doing so would make it true. He kissed her, and I saw them; they were starting to make love. The more she said it to herself, the more she began to believe it. Hilde quickly lost all interest in finding a handbag. She was too excited to worry about a purse. All she wanted was to get home and figure out what to do with this new information. Her heart was pounding fast. The more she thought about what she saw, the more real it became in her mind. She knew that she would find Anna and Judith, the Zimmer sisters, at the market. They were a year apart in age and had been schoolmates since Hilde started school. Both were also in the BDM. The two Zimmer sisters could always be found at the market after school, helping their father clean the family bakery.
Hilde tried to mess her hair and look as if she’d been running as she walked into the store. Mr. Zimmer was sweeping, and he turned and said, “Hello, Hilde. I don’t have any bread left. I’m sorry. But the girls are in the back washing the pans.”
“May I go back and see them?” Hilde asked in her sweetest voice.
“Of course. But you look a little frazzled. Are you all right?”
“Yes, yes, I’m fine,” Hilde said, and she walked into the back of the bakery.
“Hilde’s here,” Judith said, wiping her hands on her apron.
“Here, have a cookie. Papa saved a few for us,” Anna said.
Hilde took a cookie then sat down on a stool. “I have something that I need to talk to someone about. I don’t know who to turn to.”
“You can talk to us,” Judith said.
“Yes, of course you can,” Anna chimed in.
“Well, I saw something today that really frightened me.”
“What?”
“I don’t want to cause trouble. But I have to tell someone . . .”
“Go on . . . tell us,” Anna said.
“Well . . .” Hilde hesitated for dramatic effect. The Zimmer sisters were listening intently. “I saw Thea’s mother and the old Jew doctor in town.” Hilde told the girls how she saw Thea’s mother kissing Dr. Fineberg through an opening in the blinds in his office. “She was naked and so was he.” The story grew as Hilde went on. “And have you noticed? There’s a small bump in Thea’s nose, and I think I’ve seen her dark roots. I am fairly sure she bleaches her hair. Do you think it’s possible that Dr. Fineberg is her real father? Maybe she’s half Jew.”
None of the girls really liked Thea; she was too pretty, too perfect. So the two Zimmer girls easily swallowed the tale that Hilde was spinning. By the end of the week, the rumor had spread through the girls in the BDM like an aggressive cancer. By the following week, not only the girls in the BDM knew the story, but even the girls' parents were talking.
One afternoon when the BDM girls were showering after running the track, Hilde stood back a few minutes. She looked around carefully to be sure no one else saw her. Once she was sure she was alone, she took her tube of lipstick and dropped it into Thea’s handbag. She quickly ran into the shower before anyone realized she was missing.
Afterward, while the girls were getting dressed, Hilde let out a cry of panic. Everyone gathered around her. “I just found my lipstick in Thea’s handbag. Her handbag was open on the bench, and I saw it in there. I wasn’t sure it was mine, so I checked my purse, and sure enough, my lipstick is missing. She must have stolen it. Isn’t that just like a Jew to steal? I told you she was a Jew.”
“Let me see inside your purse,” Anna said to Thea.
“No. You don’t need to see inside my purse,” Thea said, shaking her head.
“Then Hilde’s telling the truth. You stole her lipstick,” another girl said.
“I did not.”
“Then why are you afraid to let us see inside your handbag? If you didn’t take it, it won’t be there,” Anna said.
“Here. Go ahead and look.” Thea thrust her handbag at Anna.
Anna fished through the contents and easily found the tortoiseshell tube. She took it out and opened it. “Is this your lipstick?”
“No. It’s not mine. I don’t know how it got into my bag,” Thea said. “I don’t own any lipstick.”
“It’s mine, and you stole it. Thea, you are a dirty, lying Jew,” Hilde said.
“I’m not Jewish. I swear it. And I didn’t take that lipstick. I don’t know how it got into my purse.”
The other girls shook their heads.
“Please, you have to believe me.”
“This is a crime. We have a responsibility to tell Frau Lundschmidt,” Judith said.
“But I didn’t do it. I swear to you; I didn’t.”
The girls refused to listen to Thea. A band of them got together and took the tube of lipstick to Frau Lundschmidt.
“You are expelled from the group until further investigation,” Frau Lundschmidt told Thea in a stern voice. “This is a terrible thing you did, Thea. I have always liked you, and I would never have expected such behavior from you. But lately, I have heard some very disturbing things about you.”
“They are not true,” Thea said.
“We shall get to the bottom of this. But until we do, you will not be able to go to the dance this weekend.”
“Oh no, please. I didn’t steal anything. I didn’t do anything wrong. I swear to you that I didn’t.” Thea began to cry, but the other girls didn’t pay any attention. They left her standing alone in the locker room with tears running down her cheeks. It was very difficult, but Hilde had to exercise strong self-control to keep the smirk off her face.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
Gretchen walked to Hilde’s flat on the afternoon of the dance, expecting to be disappointed. She was hoping that Hilde would have a dress that she could borrow, but she knew that Hilde was much bigger than her, and the chances were slim that any dress of Hilde’s would look presentable on her. Gretchen was prepared to go home disappointed instead of going to the dance to celebrate the führer's birthday.
She would never tell anyone, but she didn’t care much for the führer. All this nonsense about Jews was a waste of time. Sometimes it got on her nerves. It seemed pointless. Instead of creating fear and hatred inside of her, it was a constant reminder of how much she had enjoyed the company of the Jewish boy, Eli. She thought of his kind but dark and mysterious eyes. She remembered the thoughtful words he said about her mother and the way he made her feel. It was something she never dared tell anyone.
Gretchen knocked on the door to Hilde’s flat. Hilde opened the door smiling and said, “Come on in. I got some bread and a little cheese for us. Are you hungry?”
She anticipated Gretchen coming over, and she wanted to be able to offer her something to eat. So as soon as school was over, Hilde ran to the bus stop and caught the first bus to the Jewish bakery on the other side of town. She waited until the shop was empty and then threatened the Jewish baker. She said she would go to the police and tell them that the baker had tried to rape her. It worked. The man’s son, who was working with him, was so upset that he went to the showcase and put the last three loaves into a brown paper bag and handed them to her. The baker made a face, but he said nothing.
Hilde tucked the package under her arm and left the bakery. She smiled as she headed back home. Even before she left the house, she knew that her plan would work, and she would get at least one loaf for free. It turned out that she got three. Now she had plenty for the entire week. Well, the Jews were scared. It would suit her just fine to keep them that way.
However, Hilde didn’t go to the Jewish sector to get her cheese. She stole the cheese from her neighbor's pantry while babysitting their child two nights before. She hid it in her dresser drawer because she didn’t want to share it with her parents. Luckily, they were not home very often. When the neig
hbor came over and asked about it, she denied ever having seen it, and the neighbor left. She was happy to share it all with Gretchen.
“Actually, yes. I’m very hungry,” Gretchen admitted.
The girls sat at the table and ate. “This bread is delicious,” Gretchen said. “I’ve never had bread like this.”
“It’s an egg bread. I’m not sure what it’s called but I made it,” Hilde lied. She couldn’t tell her the truth.
“You’ll make some fellow a very good wife one day,” Gretchen said.
“I hope it’s Hann Meier.” Hilde smiled.
“I think he has been seeing Thea. Have you heard that too?”
“He might have been seeing Thea, but I’ll bet when he hears that she’s half Jewish, he’ll run.”
“Do you really think she is?”
“Sure. I know it. Look at that bump on her nose. It looks like a Jew nose to me. And just look at her hair. Sometimes when her fake blonde color is growing out, you can see that her roots are very dark. Black, like Jew or Gypsy hair.”
“Really? I’ve never seen that.”
“That’s because you’re not looking. But I saw it. And besides, who but a Jew in our group would dare to steal my lipstick? Everyone knows Jews are thieves.”
Gretchen shrugged. She didn’t want to argue with her friend, but she felt sorry for Thea. In a matter of a month, Thea lost all her friends. She went from being the most popular girl in the Bund to being ostracized. Gretchen was pretty sure that when the gossip about Thea being half Jewish reached Hann, he would probably abandon Thea too. Poor thing, Gretchen thought. A few malicious words can ruin a person. This fear is what the führer has brought to Germany. Suspicion, hatred, anger, and fear. No, I really don’t care for Adolf Hitler at all.
The girls finished eating, and Hilde quickly cleaned up the kitchen.
“Now, come with me. I want you to see the dresses.”
Gretchen followed Hilde into her room. Hilde had laid both frocks out on her bed. Gretchen’s eyes lit up when she saw the dresses.
The Smallest Crack Page 9
