"Dance with you. Here, in the living room?"
"Like my singing, I keep my dance moves reserved for private enjoyment. So, yes, dance with me in the living room."
Jack held her closely as they moved to the sound of Stevie's voice and the steady rhythm of the music. Keila held onto him tightly and took in every detail of the moment. Jack's scent, his arms wrapped around her, and the sway of his body guiding her movements all transported Keila to another place. She closed her eyes and imagined them dancing on the beach, and years from now, maybe even at their wedding. She was nowhere near ready to share that thought, but it was in her heart. She didn't come out of her fantasy until she felt Jack's hands on her face. She looked up into his eyes and saw more love and adoration then she had ever experienced. As she pushed up on her tiptoes, Keila initiated the kiss with a gentle peck to his lips as she held onto his shoulders. That was all it took for Jack to deepen it, using his tongue to press her lips open to him.
The fear of being left seeped from her body as Keila gave over to the passion she felt coming from him and the security she felt being in his arms. When he stood up straight and pulled back some, she startled. "Why'd you stop? I could tell you didn't want to."
"The words in that song remind me of you. It's probably why you hear me humming it so much. Keila Soriano, you knock me off my feet every day. I still can't believe this is real sometimes, but having you in my arms that way—yeah, I needed to stop."
"Don't I get a vote?" Keila moved back into him and wrapped her arms around his middle, laying her head on his chest, listening to the rapid beat of his heart.
"On this. No. We close the door on the past and clear up some truths so that nothing we do gets put in jeopardy over silly misunderstandings."
"Jack, I hate waiting. I'm actually pretty terrible at it."
Kissing her head, Jack responded with, "Lucky for you, I have enough patience for the both of us."
Keila went to flop back on the couch and picked up her laptop. She looked at his stunned face and stuck out her tongue. "Boo to patience and the people who have it."
All he did was laugh at her silliness as he settled back in with whatever report he'd been working on when she woke up.
Keila's tears started again in full force as she remembered that evening. This was so unfair. She reached around the bed and eventually sat up to scan her room but didn't see her phone. Eventually, she would have to leave the bed and the room. She'd heard Jack go some time ago, so she knew he wasn't out there, but still, there was hope.
Her stomach dropped at the empty living room when she walked in. There was her phone sitting on the edge of the coffee table where she'd put it when she fell at Jack's feet. She needed her sister. When she picked it up to call Brianna, Keila noticed missed calls from Bri and a single text that said: I'm on my way.
"He's being an ass. No, don't you dare make any excuses for him." Brianna scolded.
Keila had been finding ways to defend Jack to Brianna for the past hour. Bri was ready to bang his door down and give him a serious telling off, but Keila wouldn't allow it. Brianna said she was there to comfort her and Michael was next door kicking his friend in the tail end, so she backed off, a little. Considering all of the tears Keila had shed in a single hour, she could see how hard it was for Bri not to breathe fire every time Keila said his name.
"You were right. You told me to get in front of it. I just didn't have time. I didn't get a chance to. He was so hurt. Not even angry. He looked like he watched me run over his dog. It was horrible. I will never forget that look. How could I hurt him like that?"
"Aw, honey, it wasn't on purpose. You and I both know that."
"It would have been better if I'd shoved it in his face and made unreasonable demands. Jack knows how to deal with my unreasonable demands and general wigging out, but this—I would have preferred he yelled at me. He was just silent, Bri, for so long. Like he couldn't put his hurt into words. I don't even know what he thinks the damn letter means. He acted like I was going to sneak out in the middle of the night. It wasn't like that. You know it. Please explain it to him. He won't listen to me."
"I don't know if he's in the headspace to listen to anyone. But, if he can hear anything, from anyone, it'll be Michael. You know, even big, strong, captain of industry Daddies get scared. I think that's what happened. You scared Jack with what you made him feel, and when he thought you wanted or needed to leave, it scared him stupid."
"Now, who's defending him?"
"I'm exercising mature compassion. That doesn't mean I won't sock him in the eye if he doesn't get his head out of his ass and come over here to talk to you."
"Out of the two of us, you're the one who can reach his eye. I'd need to stand on a chair."
Brianna pulled her close and the two huddled in the corner of her couch, that damn letter and school brochure within her line of sight. Keila wanted to knock it off of the table and was back to wishing she, well, wishing she could turn back time.
Fifteen
Jack
"Mike, I'm not in the mood." That was the way Jack greeted his friend when the incessant banging on the door didn't stop.
"You're not in the mood? Well, you get in the mood. You might act so much older and wiser, but don't you forget who is older or who can still kick your ass if I need to. I'm not through talking to you. So, are you letting me in, or are we entertaining the whole twelfth floor?"
Jack mumbled under his breath, "Jackass."
"I'll be sure to include this fine moment in your wedding toast."
"What the hell are you talking about?" Jack really wasn't up for his friend's attempts at lighthearted deflection.
"Jack, you love that girl. Are you telling me that you, of all people, can't find a way to make two years in Paris work. I'm not buying it. You don't want her to go, and from the many texts my wife keeps sending me from across the hall, she doesn't want to go anywhere that doesn't include you. So, stop this bullshit pity-party and figure it out."
"I'm glad you went into business and not medicine or counseling. Your bedside manner leaves a lot to be desired."
"Well, my patient is being a stubborn horse's ass."
"Name calling isn't exactly a motivational tool."
"Neither is bourbon." Jack watched as Michael went to his bar for the bottle cap. Not saying a word, Michael removed the glass from his hand, tossed back the last sip, then took the bottle from his other hand and closed it up. "I don't know how long you've been at this or how much was in the bottle, but I'm cutting you off."
"Hey! You can tell Brianna what to do, but don't come in my house with your dictatorial bullshit."
"Jackson! Stop. Don't say anything else you're going to regret when you have a sober mind. This isn't about me and Brianna. Although, it will be about us if you keep hurting her friend. Now, sit your ass in that chair. I'm going to make some coffee, and you are going to figure this out. Sit, Jack."
When Michael brought the coffee out to him, it was black and strong, the smell assaulting Jack's nose before the taste took a shot at his mouth.
"This is awful."
"Good. Drink it. You don't deserve nice things right now."
"Wow, really?"
"I mean it, Jack. You don't know why she applied. You don't know when she applied. And, you don't know why she kept it from you. You're handing down a sentence, and you haven't let her plead her case."
"She told me why." Jack sat forward with his hands on his knees and looked down.
"She told you which why?"
"Why she kept it from me. She said we were already dealing with a lot this week, so she wanted to shelve this till another day, when we got back."
"And you didn't think that was reasonable? Hell, I might have made the same choice. You might have, too. We table stuff all of the time. Things we'll deal with at a better time. We do it in work and in our personal lives. Admit you overreacted and take yourself across the hall and fix it while you still can."
"Jul
ia shelved it. She waited for three months to tell me she was pregnant. She never told me she wanted to keep risking trying. She thought the end would justify the means. Look where that got us. It took me a decade to put my life back together. I don't have it in me to do that again. This is why I need absolute honesty. I can't be with someone who is okay with even the little lies. I know how badly that can turn out."
"Keila is not Julia. You cannot keep her hostage to your past. It's not fair. And, drink that. You're putting two cups and a bottle of water in you before I send you back to that apartment to make it right."
"I can't. There's no way to fix this. She—"
"She what? You don't know what she wants, because you didn't let her explain. You owe her that at least."
"I promised her I wouldn't leave. I could hear her crying; no, what I heard were gut wrenching sobs. I still walked out the door. I don't see her forgiving that."
"So, before, you couldn't forgive her for keeping a secret, and now, you're convinced you won't be forgiven for walking out. How are you so good at running our business and so awful at running your life?"
Jack sat back and closed his eyes. Was Michael right? He was so gut punched when he saw the school information, all he could do was envision worst case scenarios. Keila leaving him, being in Paris with a man her own age. Her, sneaking away because she didn't think he could handle the truth or that he would support her move to Paris. He hated admitting it, but he was holding her hostage to a comparison of a ghost. Keila was her own person, and even though he hadn't meant to, Jack had been keeping her in the shadow of a dead woman.
A cold bottle of water dropped in his lap.
"That was a little close."
"Maybe it'll shock some sense in you."
"Or send me to the hospital," Jack said as he opened the bottle and took a long sip, anything to wash away the taste of that terrible coffee.
Michael reached out an arm to help his partner to his feet. When Jack did rise, he hugged his friend, his brother, close. If he could somehow figure this out with Keila, Michael may have just saved his life again.
"Thank you, brother."
"For kicking your ass," Michael said. "Anytime. Anytime. You know what you're going to say?"
"The truth."
Sixteen
Keila
The girls were huddled up on the couch whispering when Michael and Jack came in. Keila didn't say a word. She watched as Brianna got up and went to Michael, glaring at Jack like she smelled something bad. It was on the tip of Keila's tongue to somehow defend him, but honestly, she was out of strength for the most basic movement. She didn't even get up.
Brianna came back to her and was speaking so softly that Keila had to strain to hear. "Michael and I will be right across the hall. Hang on to your phone and text me if you need to. Michael says I have to tell you to listen and be open minded and forgiving. I'm telling you to give him hell. Plus, if he wants to make it up to you, make him pay. I saw the cutest—"
"Brianna, let's go," Michael called from the door.
"I love you." Bri kissed the top of Keila's head and left with Michael. She didn't say a word to Jack.
Jack hung back by the door as if waiting for something; Keila wasn't sure what. It wasn't like she was running to him, either.
"Can I come in?"
"Technically, it's your place, so I guess you can come and go as you please."
"Then I guess a better question is do you want me to come in?"
Keila stood up, arms crossed, and eyes fixed. She was totally rooted when she said, "I never asked you to leave. You made that decision without consulting me, so why is it any different now?"
The look of shock she watched pass his eyes buoyed her conviction. Keila understood that she messed up, but after sitting with Brianna for the past hour, she also understood that Jack had messed up, too. She had the right to be pissed about him leaving, and she was ready to let him have it with both barrels if he even thought about coming down on her.
Jack's words managed to surprise her, though, and took her a little off kilter. "I'm apologizing for leaving, and I'm asking because I only want to be here if you want me to be."
Gesturing toward the couch, Keila sat back down, but this time, she took up the corner furthest from the front door. Jack sat on the opposite end. It was hard to believe a few nights earlier, she was snuggled up in his embrace.
"Go ahead, Jack, this is your conversation, right?"
She hated being so cold, but if he was only there to reconfirm what he'd said before he left, she didn't want to hear it. She couldn't hear it. If he told her one more time that she needed to go, Keila was torn between whether or not she would hit him or throw up on him. She was feeling conflicted.
"I overreacted, Keila. It's the absolute truth, even though I know it seems obvious. That's hard for me to admit. I was so devastated, even thinking that you had another secret you were keeping and that it was one that would take you away from me. Maybe it was temporary insanity."
He tried to smile his comment away, but the reality was being left brought up some things in Keila she didn't realize were lying dormant. She wasn't about to pretend what happened didn't matter. Like Jack would say, sorry wasn't enough to fix it.
"Nope. You can't plead temporary insanity or the fifth or anything else that's going to keep you from explaining. Jack. You broke your biggest promise to me. You left. I could have taken anything else, except that. You can't leave. Especially, not without even talking to me. We always talk about the most important part of the agreement and renegotiating the agreement, but here's the one thing that should never ever come up, you breaking the agreement, because you just decided I was wrong and you leave. I can't take that. Is that what you're here to do? Repeat all the reasons you have to go or that it's better if I do?"
Jack moved like he was going to pull her closer, and Keila scooted back so far and fast, she was practically sitting on the armrest.
"Whoa, what did I do—"
"Left, Jack. That's what you did. Am I not being clear? I can't have you reach out to comfort me, only to pull away again in the next breath. I can't. Now, please answer the question. Why are you here, Jack?"
"To say I'm sorry, Keila. I was wrong. The most wrong I've been in a long time, and no matter how I danced around it with Michael, we kept coming back to that. I messed up. I overreacted. I was wrong. And I apologize. I'm so, so sorry. I do have plenty more I want and even need to say, but that really needed to be the first thing. Can you forgive me?"
Keila was in awe of the man in front of her, once again. Jack could be an exacting man with seemingly impossible standards, but seeing him as a man who could apologize and humble himself made her respect for him grow. She always assumed that he got things wrong or made mistakes, but it wasn't often she got to see it or his reaction to it.
"Why are you just staring at me, Kid?"
"I guess that wasn't what I expected. Not at all."
He scooted closer again. She was still feeling hesitant, but Keila didn't pull away. She relaxed her posture and turned more in toward him.
"That's a start, but I sure don't want to go back to square one with you."
"Neither do I. Jack, I heard about the program and it sounded interesting. You were gone for a really long time. I was genuinely interested and am so honored to have been chosen, but I honestly filled out that application out of boredom. It was just something I did on a random Wednesday night. Before the letter showed up, I had put the whole idea out of my mind. That's my truth. I opened it on Saturday morning, after I woke up alone on your couch. I was so angry. I just wanted to shove it in your face and prove to you that I had other options if you didn't plan on keeping me. If you didn't want me, I was prepared to go someplace I was wanted. Brianna made me see sense on that. She told me, emphatically, that what I was about to do was wrong and she begged me to abort the mission. When you came in already so upset about finding me gone, I panicked. I shoved those papers under the couch, and
I'll admit, I didn't completely forget about them, but other things were more pressing and they weren't a priority. The last thing Bri said to me, before she hung up and I came upstairs, was, 'get in front of this, Keila.' After seeing your face, there wasn't anything I wished more than that I had told you about school and that acceptance letter."
"It looks like we both really stepped in it. The next thing to ask then is can I get a do over?"
Keila slid closer to him and pulled his arm around her. "Only if I can get one, too."
"That seems fair. So, Kid, look what I found." Jack held her in one arm and the brochure in his other hand. Anything you want to tell me about?"
"Jack, I want to tell you everything."
They talked well into the night. Even after Michael and Brianna left, they stayed on Keila's couch talking Paris, their futures, and a host of other things. Only after her fifth yawn, did Jack insist she get some sleep. There was no way she planned on sleeping alone, though, and she informed him thusly. Jack said there was no way he was sleeping in her full-size bed when he had a California king next door. She ran in her room to grab a few things for the night and locked the door to apartment 1203.
It was the last night she spent there. Sleeping alone was no longer an option.
Epilogue
Even though they'd had to postpone their original trip to meet the families, graduation went better than she could've imagined. Well, that just means she and Jack got through two rounds of meet the parents and the graduation party—in her opinion—from Hell. Although it was scary at first, Keila knew it was important to Jack, so she went to meet the Pachoutes. They were so wonderful and gracious to her. She understood why he kept them as such an important part of his life all these years.
Keila, on the other hand, wondered why she fought so hard to stay in her mom and grams' good graces. She let Jack do all of the talking when it came to the party her grams insisted on hosting. She knew anything she said would be seen as ungrateful resistance. Jack said it was a small price to pay to win favor with the she-cudas. Keila argued that it wasn't, but as usual, Jack was right, and he won the war. He kept telling her where her grams and mom were concerned, she needed to play chess not checkers and to find a way to stay a step ahead.
The Girl in Apartment 1203 Page 11
