His blue eyes were even more concerned than normal. “Kayt,” he said softly. “I’ve got to get you to Jacob’s room.”
Something in his voice terrified her. She sat up too quickly and almost lost her toast. Cameron rushed toward her bed, but he stopped before reaching out to her. She swallowed several times, then croaked, “What’s wrong?”
“He’s so frail today, and he and I both are afraid he doesn’t have too much longer.”
No! Was Jacob going to leave her today? He’d outlived every doctor’s prophecy, but she wasn’t ready to be pregnant and alone, managing more businesses than any person she’d met—not to mention her foundation—and dealing with the wrath she knew would come from Peter and Jessica. Cameron stood by the side of her bed, and she glanced up and met his gaze. At least she had him.
“Do you want to … take a shower, and then we’ll go?”
“Do I smell that bad?” she tossed back at him.
He smiled, much to her relief. “No. I just thought you might feel better.”
She would. Throwing back the covers, she forced her legs underneath her. Her stomach was tumbling, but she tried with everything in her to ignore it. Cameron was right there. He didn’t touch her, but she could smell his clean scent and she could never forget how amazing and thoughtful he was. Who would’ve guessed the tough military man could care for a sickly pregnant woman with such tenderness and patience?
They made it to the bathroom, and he thoughtfully started the shower. She leaned against the glass shower door, the cool glass soothing to her cheek.
“I’ll just … wait outside,” he muttered.
“Good plan.”
Cameron’s eyebrows jumped and he quickly strode from the room, shutting the door behind him.
Kaytlyn laughed at how uncomfortable he’d been. The only other choice was to cry at what a hot mess she was: in love with her protector while pregnant and in a fake marriage with her boss and friend. Could life get any worse?
She peeled off her clothes and studied her reflection in the mirror. She wished she had at least a baby bump, but she supposed she’d lost too much weight not being able to hold down food. She used to have a nice shape, she thought, but the woman staring back at her looked scrawny and malnourished. Great. She was not only sickly and disgusting; now she looked like a skeleton.
She stepped into the shower, laughing at her messed-up life, and promptly threw up all over the shower. Yes, life could definitely not get any worse.
Cameron paced outside Kaytlyn’s suite, sweat popping up on his brow at the thought of her in the shower. Don’t go there. Please don’t go there. Any romantic thoughts of her made his job of staying detached a hundred times harder, as if just being around the sweet, tough, and brilliant Kaytlyn wasn’t hard enough. He was amazed that she could patiently deal with an unplanned pregnancy, the sickness, the workload, and the worries over Jacob.
He clenched his fists and thought about Jacob wasting away in that bed. That helped him redirect. He had an awful feeling that Jacob was just holding on until he said goodbye to Kaytlyn. He’d never seen someone look so close to death as Jacob had looked this morning. He’d seen plenty of people he cared about already dead: Lori, several buddies in the Army, and his grandparents. He believed in a merciful Father, but the sight of someone hurting to get to the other side was disturbing and heartbreaking.
Finally, the shower shut off, but he kept up his pacing. He woke at five a.m. every day to push himself for an hour in the gym, then let himself escape the house. With his trusted security personnel notified that he was gone, he would go on an hour-long run outside, up in the mountains or down through the scenic town. The physical outlet and escape from the beautiful prison helped, but he needed more intense activity if he was going to allow himself to stay so close to Kaytlyn.
The bedroom door opened, and Kaytlyn stood there. Even with her face pale and the weight she’d lost, she was still breathtakingly beautiful. She wore a simple white sundress that showed off the creamy skin of her neck and shoulders far too much. What he wouldn’t give to simply touch that skin, maybe press his lips to it. Oh man. He’d try to lie to himself and say today was worse than usual, but every day of the past two months had been just as excruciating.
“Hey,” she whispered, smiling up at him.
“Hey.” His voice was too deep and husky. She had to know how she affected him. Anyone could read through the lines and see his stupid, desperate, secret love. He swallowed hard and said, “Can you walk?” Most of him prayed she would say yes, but there was a small, rebellious part of him that screamed for her to say, No, carry me, Cameron. Sheesh, he was a pathetic, weak mess.
She nodded bravely. “It’ll be good for me.”
He loved how strong and brave she was. He’d never seen someone as sick as she and Jacob were. At least Kaytlyn’s sickness had an end in sight. He frowned. Jacob’s sickness would end too, but not in a way any of them wanted to see. Yet Cameron didn’t want to watch Jacob hurt any longer. He also really needed something to change with him and Kaytlyn, or he might have to break his vow to Jacob to protect her and beg Sutton to send someone to replace him. No. He couldn’t stand the thought of even one of his trusted friends close to this delicate yet tough woman. This was his job, and he wasn’t giving it up for anyone or anything.
They walked slowly down the hallway. He didn’t touch her or even look at her, but he was hyperaware of her every movement. Her delicate features were etched into his mind.
“Today seems like a bad one,” he said into the silence.
“For me or Jacob?”
“Both.” He let himself look at her. Her blond hair was a deep honey as it was still wet, trailing down her back. Even weak and sickly, she glided along and glowed. “You okay?”
“I just wish it was over.”
His brow furrowed. “Over?” She couldn’t mean …
“The morning sickness.”
“Oh.” He cleared his throat and said, “I thought twelve weeks …”
“Me too, and that was yesterday.” She tenderly placed her hand over her abdomen. “The doctor said sometimes fourteen. At least I never had to be hospitalized or get an IV.”
“That is good.” Cameron felt like patting himself on the back. He was doing well so far: normal conversation, not too many longing looks, and absolutely no physical contact. He might make it through one more day in this limbo of being near Kaytlyn, but not near enough.
They reached Jacob’s door. Cameron reached for the knob but paused. “Ready?”
Kaytlyn focused on him. The power in those blue eyes was incredible. “How bad is he?”
Cameron winced. She hadn’t been here for a few days. “Pretty bad.”
“Cam.”
He sucked in a breath. The way she said his name like that, a nickname, was almost a caress. “Yes?” he managed.
“Thank you for being here.”
He nodded, unable to speak with her looking at him like he was her hero or something.
“No matter what … you’ll be here?”
This he could promise. “No matter what, Kayt.” He let himself have the privilege of using her nickname in return. He’d only slipped once before, that first day she was sick when she hadn’t answered her phone or her door and he’d been so concerned. Since then, he only thought of her as his Kayt in his mind. Yet she’d pulled the nickname card a few seconds ago, and he figured turnabout was fair play.
She squared her shoulders and said, “Okay, I’m ready.”
Cameron badly wanted to do something simple like rest his hand on the small of her back to direct her in, sweep her off her feet so she didn’t have to walk, or kiss her until she knew exactly how committed he was to protecting her. He shook his head to clear it again, swung the door open, and waited for her to walk into the suite.
Usually, Jacob had all the windows uncovered, and throughout his and Kaytlyn’s sicknesses, the housekeepers had done an incredible job of keeping their rooms spotl
ess. For the past few days, the suite had been as dark as a tomb; Jacob had finally admitted the light was giving him an unbearable headache. It was still clean, but there was a smell that Cameron had learned to loathe in the military—the smell of death. Jacob’s death wasn’t coming from an external force; he was wasting away from the inside out. Cameron hated it.
His eyes were closed, and he didn’t acknowledge them as they came in. Cameron left the hallway door open so the light would filter in. Jacob’s breathing was labored; he wasn’t resting peacefully. Kaytlyn sank into the chair at his bedside. Cameron stood next to her.
They waited in the unbearable silence for maybe half a minute. Jacob struggled with each breath and his eyes were shut tight, as if he was squeezing them shut to keep out something.
“He doesn’t look like himself,” Kaytlyn finally murmured.
“No,” Cameron agreed.
Jacob’s skin now hung on his bones. His eyebrows had dipped over his eyes until the sockets were barely visible. The veins in his arms and hands popped through translucent skin. Cameron hurt just watching this extraordinary man waste away.
Kaytlyn’s eyes were bright and bluer than ever. She brushed her fingers across Jacob’s brow.
His eyes opened. He stared at the ceiling for a second, then painstakingly turned his head to the side and focused on Kaytlyn. “Ah, Kayt,” he ground out slowly.
“Jacob.” She gave him a brave smile.
“You look … sick,” he said.
Kaytlyn laughed, brushing at the tears spilling over onto her cheeks. “You don’t look any better, my friend.”
Jacob gave what might’ve been a chuckle, but it must’ve hurt as he released her hand and clasped his own to his chest.
“Jacob?” Kaytlyn’s voice pitched with concern.
“It’s time,” he said firmly.
“Are you sure?” Kaytlyn sounded terrified, more uncertain than Cameron had ever seen her.
Jacob smiled as his eyes traced over her face. “I couldn’t be more proud of you. You’re going to do great things …” His eyes moved to Cameron’s face. “Together.”
Kaytlyn’s gaze also darted up to Cameron.
“Protect her,” Jacob said.
Cameron nodded, as serious as when he’d been baptized a Christian or taken the oath of enlistment. “With my life.”
“Thank you.” He focused back on Kaytlyn. “Protect our legacy, and our baby.”
Cameron loved how his friend had taken Kaytlyn’s baby as his own. He despised the truth of the baby’s paternity and worried if he saw Peter he’d strangle him, but it didn’t matter to Jacob. Kaytlyn’s child was Jacob’s heir on paper and in his heart.
Tears splashed down her cheeks, and she had a rough time getting the words out. “I will.”
“I love you, sweet Kayt.”
“I love you too,” she managed to say.
Jacob gave her one more smile, and then he closed his eyes. The room stilled, and the only sound was Kaytlyn’s soft cry as Jacob took his last breath. Cameron knew he was gone, yet he’d left a legacy of a life lived for everyone else. Moisture ran down his own cheeks, and he quickly brushed it away.
Kaytlyn didn’t scream or sob as he’d thought she might. She laid her cheek against the side of Jacob’s head, closed her eyes tightly, and let the tears run unchecked down her cheeks.
Cameron stood there helplessly with his hands clasped behind his back. He couldn’t protect her from this. The clock was the only sound in the room besides their breathing.
Second after second ticked by, and Kaytlyn didn’t move. Finally, she raised her head, gave Jacob a soft kiss on the cheek, and used the bed to stand. Her legs gave out. Cameron caught her around the waist and for once didn’t fight his instinct to pull her close. He swept her off her feet and against his chest. She weighed next to nothing, yet he’d never had anything so substantial and important in his arms.
Kaytlyn’s eyes were red-rimmed. She stared at him for half a beat and said, “Have you got me?”
Cameron nodded. “Always.”
Kaytlyn gave him a watery smile and laid her head against his chest. “Thank you.” She didn’t say anything more. Cameron let his eyes trail over the lifeless body of his friend and boss. He swallowed at the emotion creeping up. Jacob was gone. Kaytlyn needed him.
Turning, he strode from the room with her clinging to his neck. He had imagined he’d feel a guilty sort of relief when Jacob passed, but it was the exact opposite. He felt sorrow at losing his friend, a loss that would make the world a worse place, as Jacob was a benevolent rock for so many people. Cameron also felt an impending sense of doom; he feared the next chapter in Kaytlyn’s fight would be harder than the last.
He cuddled her even closer, savoring the feel of her in his arms and recommitting to not let her out of his sight. No one was going to hurt her or the baby.
Chapter Seven
The next three days in the mansion were busy and somber. The entire staff was subdued, and Kaytlyn often saw tears in their eyes. Everyone had loved and almost revered Jacob. She knew exactly how they felt. Miraculously, her nausea eased. While it wasn’t gone, she was able to get up the day after Jacob’s passing, eat her toast and drink her ginger tea, shower, and make it to her office with Cameron anxiously trailing behind her as if she would collapse.
The thought of Cameron had her smiling to herself as she worked out funeral plans, sent announcements to media correspondents, and dealt with emails and texts of friends and associates sending their condolences. While no one but her, Cameron, Larry, and the doctor knew of their marriage or the baby, everyone knew how close she and Jacob had been. She cried off and on throughout the days leading up to the funeral, but she made it through them.
Cameron had stationed himself just outside her office or bedroom door, only leaving her when she slept. He was there for her, but he was still detached. He’d held her close and carried her to her room after Jacob’s passing, but he hadn’t touched her since or said much to her besides constantly asking how she was doing. He was a lot more than just a set of strong arms to hold her up. She knew he would be there for her, in sickness or in health, no matter what. Her respect and trust for him just kept growing.
The morning of the funeral was a gorgeous, bright blue August day. Kaytlyn dressed in a silky, short-sleeved knee-length black dress. There was a little more color in her cheeks today, and she didn’t feel quite as gaunt, as she’d been able to keep food down since Jacob passed. He must be watching over her from heaven. She’d always believed in God and an afterlife, but she’d never felt His existence quite so deeply as she did now.
Swinging open her bedroom door, she paused and admired the sight of Cameron standing there in a black suit. He was so handsome that he stole her breath away. His gaze traveled over her carefully. He didn’t smile, but his blue eyes warmed. “You look beautiful, Kayt,” he murmured.
“So do you,” she said, noticing he’d used her nickname again. She loved it on his lips. She’d love a lot more from his lips, but now was not the time to be indulging in selfish fantasies.
He did smile then. “Take it back.”
Kaytlyn grinned, loving that he could tease even for a second. “Pretty boy,” she shot at him.
“Gorgeous girl,” he shot back.
“Ooh, what an insult.” She laughed.
Cameron chuckled with her. They sobered at the same time, and Cameron stared at her. “It feels good to laugh,” he said.
“There hasn’t been much to laugh about for a while now. Is it going to get easier, Cam? Are we going to laugh and be happy again?”
“Yes. I’ll make sure your life gets easier and you can laugh and be happy.”
Kaytlyn felt his declaration deeply, but even as tough and amazing as Cameron was, she didn’t know that anyone could make her life easier and happier for the time being. She was a pregnant widow of a well-known billionaire philanthropist, and when her former best friend found out that Kaytlyn owned everything
and the will had been changed—not to mention that Kaytlyn had married Jacob and the child Jessica thought would be hers was being claimed as Jacob’s heir—all of the devil’s minions would be loosed.
Cameron lifted his hand, and her eyes widened. So many times, he’d almost touched her but then stopped himself. Would he stop today? His hand seemed to be in slow motion as it covered the distance, and then he simply cradled her cheek in his palm.
Kaytlyn leaned into his touch, bringing her own hand up to wrap around his. “It feels good to be touched,” she said, hoping he wouldn’t pull away.
His eyes got serious. “Kayt. I promised Jacob … we have to take things slow.”
Kaytlyn didn’t know exactly what that meant or what he’d promised Jacob, but though she longed to be closer to Cameron, she was in no rush. There was too much to deal with right now, and it wasn’t like she had time for something so sweet as romance. But oh, how she craved it—no, she craved him.
Yet she knew how determined Cameron was, and she would need time to heal from Jacob’s loss. She didn’t know what else to say but, “All right.”
Cameron gave her a tight smile, removed his hand, and gestured down the hall. Kaytlyn squared her shoulders and walked in front of him.
The limousine took them to the graveside service. Cameron stayed close by her side, and although he didn’t touch her, his sheer strength and presence felt protective and comforting. He was her friend and support, exactly what she needed. She had a hard time focusing as people gave their speeches: the governor of Idaho; one of Jacob’s longtime friends, who was now a general in the Army; an associate who headed the anti-trafficking battle in South America; and finally Larry, who said a few words as Jacob’s close friend and church leader.
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