by Ali Winters
Pale light streamed through the thin curtains of the balcony doors and cast her in a dark blue hue. He watched her for a long moment, wanting to remember her and hating that he couldn’t. She was fascinating in her feelings, always obvious and genuine.
It wasn’t long before his own tired eyes closed of their own will.
THIRTY-THREE
NIVIAN
NIVIAN POURED CREAMER into her coffee, the cloud of white billowed and mingled with the dark creating a rich brown. She watched, mesmerized as the movement of the two liquids merged as they lost themselves in each other. Her spoon hovered over the mug.
“Good morning,” Kain said. His voice startled her and she dropped the spoon into the coffee. A few drops splashed up and landed on the counter.
“Morning,” she mumbled back, unable to look him in the eye.
“Sorry about that,” he said.
She lifted her head, ready to tell him that he had nothing to be sorry for only to realize he’d meant for startling her. He held out a napkin for her to sop up the mess. She took it and looked away, giving a little too much attention to the spill to be natural.
In the harsh light of day, after sleeping away the exhaustion, she couldn’t help but feel awkward after the moment they’d shared the night before.
Kain poured himself a cup, not seeming to notice her inner turmoil. He leaned against the counter, sipping his drink while she looked everywhere but at him. Nivian could feel the weight of his eyes on her.
“Nivian?” he asked.
She lifted her head. Guilt was splashed all over his face. She didn’t know what he had to feel bad about, but she didn’t get the chance to ask.
A cool rush of power swirled around the room and Caspian appeared in the doorway.
Kain turned, following her gaze to see what distracted her.
“Nivian, it is time for your ceremony.”
Her stomach twisted into knots, her throat unbearably tight. Nivian set her half drunk cup down on the counter, pushing it back from the edge with her finger, and said, “I’ll be back a little later, Kain. Maybe you could go through your boxes and see if that helps?”
She grabbed her cloak from the hook next to the door and wrapped it around her shoulders. Her fingers fumbled with the clasp, suddenly feeling cold and numb.
Once she was ready, she realized Caspian wasn’t paying attention to her, but to Kain.
“Would you like to join us, Kain?” Caspian offered.
Her jaw dropped.
Kain sat his mug down in the sink with a soft click of ceramic against metal. “Yeah, I’d like that.”
Nivian could swear her eyes were ready to jump out of their sockets but she managed to reel in her shock and snapped her mouth closed. Kain had been to Mophar once before, then again the day before… the risk of increased exposure to him was unknown. Mophar was meant only for Reapers.
“Caspian?” she asked.
“He has been touched by the hand of death, Mophar will never reject him,” Caspian answered her unspoken question. He had given it thought before he came to get her. “Like you, he is of both worlds. First, his parents, and now in his own right because of his passage through the Underworld and back.”
Caspian opened his arms and motioned them both to join him, placing a hand on each of their shoulders. Nivian grasped Kain’s hand.
Transporting with Kain was infinitely easier with Caspian’s help.
Caspian said nothing as he turned, leading them through the main gates of G.R.I.M. Headquarters.
It seemed busier than normal with more Reapers milling about the common area, but it was all just in her head. The feeling magnified by the weight of eyes on them… on Kain. He was the only one without a cloak. The only one clearly not a Reaper.
Kain clasped her hand tighter, throwing her a look every few seconds as if he were nervous. He hardly seemed to notice the other Reapers closing in like a wave of water behind them as they passed.
Murmuring followed them as they traversed the hall and headed for the stairs down into the belly of G.R.I.M. Though Kain seemed too preoccupied with watching her to notice. Was his trepidation for her?
They entered Silas’s throne room. Though she should start thinking of it as hers, she supposed. But perhaps not. She couldn’t imagine spending much time in such a cold and lonely room. She wanted to be out in the world, she wanted… Nivian took in Kain’s profile as he looked agape at the chandelier above, radiating darkness rather than light.
They followed close behind Caspian and into the shadows at the back of the room. Caspian placed his hand along the wall, so close to where she had found the entrance to the labyrinth below, and a section of wall fell away.
Fire blazed to life in the gutter along the floor that circled the outer edge of the room. Caspian immediately went to the corner and prepared once more for the ceremony.
Nivian bit the inside of her cheek painfully as she stared down at the altar. She felt like a lamb going to slaughter, though she knew it wasn’t like that, and that the reason for it was much more important. Still, there was a lump of fear working its way up into her throat.
Kain’s hand squeezed hers.
“Is there anything I can do?” he whispered into her ear. His warm breath sent shivers down her spine and warmed her skin as it skittered across her cheek.
“Just you being here is enough,” she said, and meant it. Still, she couldn’t help the impulse to draw in a shaking lungful of air.
Kain pulled her into his arms and she closed her eyes, soaking up the warmth and steadiness of his embrace. She tilted up her chin to look at him. The fingers of one of his hands slid up her spine, across her shoulder, grazing the tender skin of her neck, and brushed gently across her cheek.
The draw between them pulsed in her heartbeat pressed against him. He lowered his face until his breath caressed her cheek again.
A clack of quickly moving footsteps made her draw away, and Kain let his arms fall without resistance.
She already missed the feel of him around her.
“Sorry for being late, my mark was a stubborn one,” Evander said as he strode into the room, unaware he’d broken the moment she shared with Kain.
He hadn’t been there the first time. Nivian frowned.
“Nivian,” Caspian’s voice demanded her attention. He motioned to the altar, the relief carvings of vines and skulls that decorated the sides had an ominous feel to them this time and she shuddered. “If you would please take your place, we need to begin.”
She nodded and walked stiffly to the raised dais. Nivian pressed her back to the stone, the cold seeping through the layers of clothes. She lifted herself up with her arms, then slid her legs atop it.
Nivian swallowed her nerves, telling herself she would be fine. It failed during their first attempt, but she was still fine.
Caspian took his place at her head, exactly as he had the first time, and offered the combined chalice to her.
The black of the Reaper’s obsidian and the gold from the Hunters mixed catching the light. The juxtaposition of the two merged ceremonial cups created something even more beautiful.
He couldn’t help but think how symbolic that was of how the two groups should have been working together from the start. It was the one thing Yeva did that turned out to be a blessing.
The cool stone and metal cup was both rough and smooth from its patchy design under her fingertips. She swallowed down the water in three large gulps then handed it back to Caspian. She tried to give him a reassuring smile but it felt false.
Nivian lay back on the uncomfortable stone slab and let her head lull to the side.
Kain was here. She had him back. And now she could dedicate her heart and soul to doing this because he would be with her.
Evander moved to the foot of the altar then placed his hands around her ankles. She didn’t care why there was a change in the ceremony, there were more pressing matters on her mind, such as the pain she knew would come, and her fear tha
t she couldn’t give enough of herself that the power demanded and this would inevitably fail.
Caspian placed the obsidian stone upon her forehead and lifted his hands to hover over her face. His eyes slid closed and he prepared to start.
Incantations fell from Caspian’s lips like drops of water. Each word as beautiful as it was ugly. And powerful.
This time when her own eyes demanded to close, she didn’t fight it. Nivian could feel the power caress her skin like the cool scales of a serpent. Pressure built in her chest, filling her with an unidentifiable emotion.
She focused on Kain, focused on keeping her body open to the power that would soon be a part of her. She would accept Silas’s powers and allow them to become her own.
It started in her skin, moving to her muscles, then nerves, a cold, painful and sharp, like nails ripping at flesh. The soft, red light that glowed through her eyelids faded to pitch black.
Nivian floated in the dark. A beating so fast filled her ears, it was almost a deep buzzing. She realized with a start that the drumming was her heart pounding furiously against her ribs.
Cold enveloped her, sinking in through her skin and seeping into her bones. She tried to reach out and grab onto something, anything, as the power swarmed her veins, leaving her feeling overly full and empty simultaneously.
She clawed at the void surrounding her, but she was a prisoner in her own body.
It was too much. She wanted to be the Fate Keeper, needed to be. Everyone was counting on her. But she would die, empty and alone if they kept going.
A small light flickered at her side.
Warmth covered her hand, comforting and gentle. It washed through her, soothing her racing pulse, easing the bite of the icy cold and anchoring her to her heart, mind, and body.
Then her vision exploded into countless stars. She could see all of time, past and present. She was as infinite as the universe itself. Her mind flew through all of life and death, every second that happened and every second that would come to pass all at once. Each a grain of gilded sand on a beach.
Then everything faded to black.
Nivian couldn’t tell how long she lay there before red flickered through her eyelids and she could feel her body once more.
She wriggled a finger, then another.
Her eyes snapped open and she inhaled a rasping breath. She ached everywhere, but she was whole. More than whole. She felt Silas’s power… her power… coursing through her blood.
Slowly, Nivian sat up. Her muscles were weak, her mind caught in a fog. Then she looked down to the warmth covering her hand and saw Kain’s clasping it tightly.
Nivian transported Kain to the edge of Hunter Corp. She wasn’t sure she was ready for this. Kain had only been back for a little over a few days. She wanted to spend more time with him, wanted to help him remember. She didn’t want him to attempt the transfer of powers just yet.
But they were out of time. They only had until nightfall.
Kain paced back and forth trying to release pent up, nervous energy. She understood his anxieties all too well and wanted nothing other than to soothe them.
But even she still carried fears and doubts. Flashes of Finn’s ceremony circled her mind, over and over, like a carousel of nightmares.
She inhaled, ready to speak to him, but the tingle of power that was distinctly Caspian’s, followed by Evander seconds before they arrived, kept her silent.
Over the past few days since her ceremony, Kain had been going with Caspian to Yeva’s sanctuary to prepare and then coming back to their apartment to spend the nights with her. They talked in the small apartment until late in the night, longer than they should have. Still, there was no hint that his memory would return.
At first, she objected when Caspian insisted she stay behind during the prep, but she gave in when he brought up the point that they had no idea if her power would interfere with his ability to read Kain’s progress. Though, she only agreed in the end on the condition she be allowed to go when it was time for the ceremony.
A few minutes later, Azira and Colin joined them. With Evander’s help, she transported everyone, leaving Caspian to retain as much of his power as possible.
They would not be taking any chances.
Caspian led Kain to the dais. Nivian had a hard time letting him go. Not wanting to risk anything happening to him again. Even if it didn’t mean the end of everything, she knew losing him would destroy her.
She hung back on the edge of the clearing, chewing her thumbnail to a stub. Kain lay down on the stone altar. With each movement, her stomach flipped several times.
Evander walked up next to her and gave her a nod with his best reassuring smile. It was like he could hear her thoughts and doubts.
“You said yourself he is the only one who can do this. You brought him back from death, if he could survive that, then this will be easy.”
She bit down on the tender part of her thumb to find the skin raw from her chewing. Nivian frowned and crossed her arms. “I’m just scared of losing him again,” she admitted.
“Yes, but if he doesn’t do this now, before nightfall, then it won’t matter and you will lose him. We will all lose everything.”
He was right. Of course he was right. But even his logic wasn’t enough to calm her. Everything hinged on Kain being able to complete the transfer.
“Last night, Kain told me Caspian seems to think his memory will come back once it’s complete.”
Evander’s blue eyes darkened. “I hope he’s right.”
“Me too,” she said, clasping her hands together so tight her knuckles cracked. She shook her head as if it could rid her of her uncertainty. “Me too… I don’t know what we’ll do if he doesn’t.”
“You can’t think like that. You must trust in fate.” Evander gave her a reassuring smile.
Caspian cleared his throat.
Nivian looked up, expecting him to call them all to their positions. Instead, he stood back from the altar, Azira cornering him against a tree with her small form. She took a step forward and Caspian backed up, bumping into the tree trunk behind him. He looked… intimidated by her. Azira slipped her hand into Caspian’s, her other hand reaching up to guide his face to meet her gaze.
Azira looked confidently into his nervous face, then moved her hand to his collar, making him lean forward until he was only an inch from her.
Then, Azira rose up on her toes and kissed him in front of everyone.
Silence filled the clearing for a long moment before she broke away. Caspian looked like a startled deer, wide-eyed and somewhat smitten, if Nivian had to guess. Then loud enough for everyone to hear, Azira said, “It will work, now go.” Then playfully shoved him toward the dais.
“What the hell, Az!” Colin snapped.
Azira just smirked and gave him a nonchalant shrug.
“I don’t know,” she muttered, her neck and face turning bright red. “I’m just… drawn to him. Now shush, we need to focus.”
“Colin and Azira, would you please stand at either side of Kain?” Caspian asked, all uncertainty and personal thoughts pushed away. “Evander, if you would, take your place at his feet.”
“Why has this changed?” Nivian asked, struggling to get enough breath for her words to make her question heard.
Caspian paused. “It is to help balance the flow of power,” he said simply. He took his place at the head of the altar and handed Kain the combined chalice. The obsidian and gold sparkled in the late afternoon sun.
Kain took the cup and drank deeply, his eyes remaining locked on Nivian.
So many words swirled in those green irises of his, but his face remained unreadable. He reclined until he was flat on his back and his arms straight at his sides.
Caspian placed the silver rune stone atop the Hunter’s forehead, then lifted his hands aloft, hovering inches over Kain’s face.
Nivian shook, her nerves completely frayed, but she forced her feet to move so she stood close to him but not enough
to interfere.
Caspian recited the incantations. The sharp words scraped down her bones, making her feel ill. Their rhythm jarring and rough, giving his voice an echoing quality.
A shield grew up from the four points between the two Hunters and two Reapers.
She was an outsider to this ceremony. An observer. There was no part for her to play. Unlike her, Kain needed light and dark. She was just made up of the dark. She would witness the success, or failure, alone.
Feeling so useless was so much worse than she’d ever imagined it could. Nivian hated waiting, at least when the outcome was not something she could predict.
But the Moirai had told her Kain was the only one who could survive. They wouldn’t have sent her on that mission if he would suffer the same fate as Finn.
Dark Reaper’s light formed under Caspian’s hands as if he were holding it down so it couldn’t fly off on its own. Then, like a charmed snake, a tendril of golden light floated up from the stone, flowing into the orb, filling it. Sparking and flaring, it danced until the darkness was gone.
The power dove for Kain, sluicing over him like waves, thick as honey.
Kain writhed under the power’s hold. The rise and fall of his chest increased as he was blanketed.
Nivian blinked, and Finn was there on the stone slab, squirming and crying out. She took a step back, trying to shake the image from her eyes.
No. It was Kain, not Finn.
Sparks danced along Kain’s skin as beautiful as fireworks. He tremored, barely perceptible at first but soon it was violent and his mouth opened to scream. But no sound came.
A single fissure cracked down his cheek, spreading down his neck.
Nivian stumbled back.
No…
It was happening again.
Failure.
It was the same as the last time.
Yeva’s power blanketed him in streaks of lightening.
She looked to the others holding on to Kain, they were slumping, barely able to stand.
Kain struggled under the weight of the power, his cry silenced under the weight of the agony.
