“From the looks of it, you could’ve knocked him off guard.” His hand covered mine, balling it into a fist. “Where’d you learn to do that?”
“My dad made me take self-defense classes a few years ago. I’ve never used it before, so I probably couldn’t actually hurt anyone.” But Will’s face came to mind as I pulled my arm back.
“You’ve got pretty good form.” He wrapped both hands around my arm, one at my bicep and one at my elbow, then rotated my arm around. “If you’ve only got one punch, you better make it count. An uppercut would do the trick better than a jab, since you’re a girl and all.”
“What’re you saying, that I’m weak?” My arm felt feeble in his strong hands, not that I’d ever tell him that.
“Just compared to a guy. Body leverage is key.” He thrust my arm forward until my fist tapped his face. “See, lights out. Your jab would’ve distracted him enough so you could run away. Maybe left him with a black eye.”
“That’ll be the day.” I rubbed my fist. “If you hadn’t shown up, I might’ve spent the night in the slammer.”
“Glad I got here just in time.” The firelight flickered in his eyes. Suddenly he dropped my arm and his eyes fell with it. “I finally got ahold of Abby. She’s been avoiding me, said she didn’t want to tell me what happened with James.”
“Why not? I’m his sister.” Or half-sister. Could it be true? The fire wobbled behind him, the crowd undulating around me, as if the earth was about to give way. “Does it have something to do with what Will said? He said I’m the firstborn, and I almost believed him.”
His eyebrows scrunched up, his fingers massaging his forehead. “Abby said she wouldn’t say anything unless we figured it out ourselves. She said it was too personal, not her secret to tell.”
He snatched my hand, dragging me away from the crowd.
“Where are we going?” I couldn’t see his eyes. Shadows covered his face as we trudged up the grassy hill. Then we hit the cobblestone, a lamppost spotlighting his cinched-up forehead. His gaze cut right through me, like he could see something beyond me, on the other side of me.
He squinted for practically all eternity. Then his eyes widened in an instant. “Maybe that’s why he got kicked out. Why it’s you and not him.”
Black dots flashed before my eyes, and the world swayed back and forth. My knees wobbled.
“No, it can’t be true.” I clutched his forearm as he wrapped it around my waist. Finally his intense gaze found me. The horizon stilled for a minute.
“What if it is true, what if James is really your half-brother?”
“No.” Sparks of light and shadow swirled before my eyes, stinging every part of my body. Fire pulsated inside me until it morphed into a core of fury in my chest. I balled my fists up, but my uppercut drooped halfway there as my knees buckled beneath me.
Bryan caught me, steadied me, but I flinched against his strong arms, fury still burning inside.
Behind clenched teeth I managed to say, “He can’t be right.”
“I hate it, too.” Those aqua eyes roamed my face. “But it’s the only explanation that makes any sense. The Seer is always the firstborn, so maybe it’s you and not James, and that’s why Nexis kicked him out.”
“No way. I just can’t believe it.” I shook my head so hard my hair whipped me in the face. “I can’t be the Seer. It’s all completely ridiculous. I’m done talking about it.”
I clomped down the hard sidewalk, booking it toward my dorm. At least some part of me knew where to run.
“What if you are the Seer?” His soft voice grew louder the closer he got.
I whirled around on my heels and stared him down. “Honestly, I don’t care who the Seer is. I just want my brother back.” Something inside me snapped and I let loose, pounding my fists into his chest. They bounced right back off his solid muscle. So I flattened my palms, smacking him until my hands hurt. Like a little girl.
“I’m sorry, honey.” His arms wrapped around me, tighter this time, pinning my arms to my sides. He stroked my hair, nudging me into his shoulder like my beating hadn’t even hurt him.
“I don’t know what to think any more. Every time I think things can’t get worse, they do.” I buried my face in his warm sweatshirt and let him lead me back to the dorm. What if he was right? There had to be a reason James left. Could this be it? “I’m sorry. I’m too old for tantrums. I don’t know what I was thinking.”
“I shouldn’t have pushed you like that. Whatever happens, we’ll figure this out together.” At the front door, Bryan enveloped me in his rock-solid arms. “Listen, we still have two years before you turn eighteen and we know if you’re really the Seer. And I’m not going anywhere, okay?”
“Good.” I wrapped my arms around him, too.
He bent down, his face inches from mine. He pressed his soft lips to my forehead. “Goodnight.”
Somehow I walked into the dorm, away from him. My cell phone practically burned a hole in my pocket. I knew just who to call, no matter how late it was. They needed to hear this, even if I had to wake them up.
Chapter 17
“Hello?” Dad’s groggy voice croaked back at me through the phone. One peek at the clock told me I should’ve waited till tomorrow. My room was like a dungeon, dark and cold. But an angry inferno still burned me up inside. I couldn’t let it go.
“Sorry to wake you, Dad,” I said, my voice loud and snappy. Wait a sec, did he even know the truth? Maybe he didn’t. I bit my tongue.
Shanda mumbled something at me and rolled over. I slipped on my flip-flops and padded out of the room, leaving her alone in the dungeon. Flapping down the stairwell to the empty dorm lobby, I inhaled a deep breath—willing calm to spread through me as I exhaled.
“Hey there, Monkey.” He cleared his throat. His pet name for me hung in the air, like a sliver of hope I could almost reach out and grab. “Is everything okay. It’s midnight there, right?”
“I don’t know.” Such a Dad question. The anger softened into a sadness that wobbled my voice—sadness for him, sadness for me. I couldn’t be the one to tell him, not if he didn’t already know. “I want to know what happened to James. Did he get kicked out of Nexis? Why would you guys still want me to join? I just don’t understand.”
“What do you mean, what happened to James? Calm down, sweetie, you’re not making any sense.” His baritone faded into the background. Random noise filtered through. Was that Mom’s voice? Great. I’d woken them both.
A blonde head burst through the front door, and I flinched. Monica flounced past me, trotting up the stairs.
“Lucy, you shouldn’t have called so late.” Mom’s stern voice blared from the earpiece. “Why don’t you worry about normal teenage things like boys and clothes instead of James? You should have a nice boyfriend by now, like that Stanton boy. What’s wrong with him?”
“Mom, I want to know what happened to James, not talk about my boyfriend.” I clapped my hand over my mouth. Too late.
I flicked my gaze to the second floor landing just in time to see Monica flee into the stairwell. Great, it’d probably be all over school by Monday.
“Your boyfriend?” Her screech buzzed into the phone so loud I whipped it away from my ear. “Who is it?”
“No one, Mom.” She would hate the way I rolled my eyes now, but seriously, c’mon. “I don’t have a boyfriend, just a guy friend or two. That’s not even the point. I want to know about James.”
“Lucy,” she sighed into the phone. “We haven’t heard anything new in ages. That can’t be what this is about.”
“It’s not.” I sucked in a breath, the words on the tip of my tongue. Not here, in the dorm lobby. I tiptoed into the kitchen, plopped on a counter stool, and sucked in a deep breath. If I could get through this, I could get through anything.
“Is James really my brother, or my half-brother?” The words tumbled out before I had a chance to check them. “Please, just tell me the truth. I deserve to know.” I hoped Dad went bac
k to sleep.
A low gasp came through the speaker. She breathed into the phone, but didn’t say a word.
“How did you find out?” Her choked words were soft and breathy. “I’m sorry, honey. You weren’t supposed to know until you turned eighteen.”
“Mom!” I screamed into the phone, not caring if I woke up the whole house. “How could you keep this from me for so long, then send me here?”
“You were supposed to join Nexis and become a great leader.” She hissed through the phone. “They would’ve helped you figure things out. You’d be set up for life.”
“You mean like James?” I tightened my fists to hold back the tide of anger surging throughout my body. “I don’t want to be brainwashed, thank you.”
“You don’t think the Guardians are brainwashing you, too? Don’t be so naive. Have you joined the Guardians or something?” Her last words sounded more like an accusation.
“I haven’t decided yet.” A hint of gravel tinged my voice, as if I could snap any second. “Just give me one good reason to join Nexis. One that doesn’t involve them exploiting me.”
“Because you can change the world.” Her tone turned sugary real quick. “Nexis is all about bringing our society to new heights. Lifting the whole planet out of its petty wars and rampant capitalism. There could be a new reality—peace and prosperity for every person. Who doesn’t want that?”
“At what price, Mom?” Her words cut into me like a razor blade. She believed every word. The truth shined straight through her words, like a faraway star twinkling in the darkest night. “You can’t possibly be so deluded that you don’t realize the cost. The resistance, the bloodshed involved—”
“Don’t you speak that way to me.” Her terse words were even, smooth and cold with an icy edge. “You are my daughter, and you’ll do as I say.”
“Excuse me? I am your daughter, but I won’t do as you say.” I dug my nails into my palm until my knuckles turned white. “You can’t even tell me the truth. I don’t even know who my brother is, or who his father was. Do you?”
The volume of that statement reverberated back to me. Who was I, really?
“Young lady, that’s none of your business. I’ve heard enough of this nonsense.” The sinister note in her voice sent a shiver down my neck. “If you won’t do what I want then I will come there and make you.”
“What?” I slapped my hand on the kitchen granite. “How exactly can you make me join Nexis?”
“There are ways, Lucy girl. You won’t like them very much. Don’t make me fly out there.” So cold. She didn’t sound like my mom at all.
All the energy drained from my body, and so did the fight. I slid down from the stool, my eyes welling up.
“Whatever, it won’t change my mind.” I huffed into the phone.
“Then I think this conversation is over.” Her venom got cut off by dead air.
Did she seriously just hang up on me? Wow, I thought I had issues. She couldn’t be more clueless. All along I’d assumed Dad really wanted me to join Nexis, but it was Mom the whole time. Was it her idea to send me to Montrose?
Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds buzzed in my ear. Not this again. Mom better not be calling to apologize for hanging up on me. I hopped down from my stool, stomping down the checkerboard tile to the fridge. With a bang, I thrust open the door and yanked out a Dr. Pepper can as I accepted the call.
“Okay, what’s the deal?”
“Lucy?” Bryan’s voice came through the phone, not Mom’s. “I’m sorry to call so late. I just wanted to check on you. Everything all right?”
“Sorry, I just had a fight with my mom.” I blew all the pent up rage from my lungs, taking a swig from my soda can. “She’s still gung ho about me joining Nexis. She even said she’d fly out here and make me join. Yeah right. Then she totally hung up on me.”
“Ouch, that sounds rough.” Silence on the other end.
I angled the phone away my face, but the call hadn’t ended. If he was waiting for me to cough up the truth about James, that’d be on the other side of never-gonna-happen. No way I was ready to admit the truth to anyone, not even him. Not yet.
“Maybe I can cheer you up.” It came out like a question, like he wasn’t sure.
“Doubt it, unless it’s really good.” I paced across the kitchen, a vain attempt to work out my frustration. Maybe if he was here, that’d cheer me up. Then again, maybe not.
“Felicia’s first exhibit opens tomorrow at a gallery in the city. You think you’re up for that?” His voice cracked at the end of his spiel. How cute. He sounded just as anxious as I felt.
“Why not? I could use a distraction right about now. I’ll be there.”
Air whistled into the phone. “Great, we’ll leave Friday after dinner. I’ll meet you in your lobby, around seven?”
“Sounds perfect, see you then.” He could probably hear the smile on the other end, but who cared. Another chance to see Bryan. Wouldn’t exactly call this one a date, right? More like a desperate attempt to cheer up the girl who just found out her brother wasn’t her brother. At least he gave me something to look forward to, something that calmed me down just a simmer.
* * *
White dust puffed up like smoke in the dark sky, shrouding the street in gray mist. It felt like I’d landed on an alien planet, where the truth I’d always taken for granted turned into lies. I didn’t really belong in this city, or home, or anywhere. Suddenly the path I’d planned for my future, for Yale, seemed hidden in shadows. The gray mist fogged up everything in sight, my way more uncertain than ever.
“C’mon, Lucy.” Bryan guided me out of the bakery haze, like my own personal seeing-eye dog, away from the 23rd Street subway station. The crowd of faces blurred into an amalgam as I passed, until they didn’t even look like faces any more. I needed someone else to see things for me right now, because somehow I had missed it.
How could I have been so blind to my family, my own mother? Her despicable lies, pushing me toward Nexis the whole time—even after she’d sacrificed her own son on its altar. A shudder racked my shoulders and I bumped someone’s elbow.
On the sidewalks of Chelsea the blur finally lifted, faces blaring into full focus. A guy yelled at me to buy a pretty watch, another thrust his bootlegged movies at me, some guitarist crooned in front of an open case. But nothing touched me. Somehow I felt more alone than ever, cut off from my family, my lifeline. It was frayed and broken in so many pieces I’d never be able to put it back together again. Not the way it was before. I was too afraid to even ask Dad how much he knew. That seemed more like a face-to-face conversation.
Around the corner a line of people clogged up the sidewalk. Bryan squeezed my hand. “We made it.”
That small gesture, the tiny glimmer of hope on his face fizzled up my arm. I squeezed back.
“I can’t see anything.” I arched on tiptoes, still barely taller than his eye level.
“Here we go, the Montgomery Gallery of Fine Art.” He put two hands on my waist and lifted me up onto a bench like I weighed five pounds. A swarm of butterflies buzzed in my stomach.
The wind picked up, and I rushed to smooth down my black tulle skirt. Good thing I wore leggings and boots tonight.
A pewter cursive sign was backlit like a work of art. I dug my camera out of my purse and snapped a photo. That’s when I spotted two tufts of red in the sea of black-clad New Yorkers. “I guess Laura and Lenny beat us here.”
“Let’s go stand by them.” He slid his arm around my torso and helped me down. His broad shoulders squared a path through the line until we caught up with the red-heads.
“This is so cool.” Laura squealed as we approached. “I’m part of some actual New York nightlife.”
“Too bad you’re too short to see any of it.” Lenny’s deep laugh rumbled from his chest. “Not that there’s much to see.”
She fluffed her loose curls. “I’m not too short to see our friends coming this way.”
Tony sauntered up
to us in his signature black leather jacket. “You guys are easy to pick out of a crowd.”
“And you blend right in.” I curled my lips at him, as if there was some life left in me yet.
He just smiled back and tugged on his leather lapels. A blonde head peeked over his shoulder.
“Here’s your ribbons back.” Brooke held out the blue and gold satin, reeking of wood smoke.
Memories of that horrible bonfire gushed back. Will spewing out the wretched truth that clogged my lungs, made it hard to breathe. It was too much right now.
I pushed back his words and pushed away her hands, swallowing down the bile burning my throat. “You keep them. You might need them again.”
“Thanks.” Her face lit up like I’d done her a huge favor. Quite the opposite, really. She tucked the ribbons in her purse, out of sight, out of mind. The bonfire images faded into the crisp night air. I inhaled a fresh breath.
Then the doors opened and the crowd herded us into a white-walled room with black floors.
Bryan rested his hand on the small of my back, sweet but not possessive. Butterflies zigzagged up my spine as he led me around the gallery.
We shuffled around the front area of landscapes on one side and photography on the other. Bryan, Tony, and Lenny lingered over the landscapes. Brooke and Laura oohed and ahhed over the trick photography.
Then we hit the impressionist alcove. Each painting was a masterpiece of sheer beauty full of light and color that chinked open the dark corners of my blurry gray world. To me, they spoke volumes. Maybe there was still something in this world I could cling to—life, beauty, love. It was all still there, whether I could see it or not.
“C’mon. Since we’re the only ones here not related, you’ll just have to pretend I’m your big bro.” Tony practically yanked me into the next room, where a fire-engine red wall showcased modern art. Chaos on canvas.
“You’re like five months older than me.” Still, my heart clenched at his words, wanting so badly to cling to the straw of hope he offered. I shoved his leather shoulder. “Ick, get me out of here. I don’t get any of this stuff. That one over there has some cool paint splatters, but c’mon. I could totally do that in art class.”
The Nexis Secret: YA Fantasy Romance (The Nexis Angel Series Book 1) Page 16
