by S S Bazinet
William looked upwards and frowned, studying a small crack in the plaster ceiling. He was the one who was getting off base emotionally. “You’re right. I’m probably upset with myself, and I’m taking it out on you.”
“What’s bothering you?”
“Where do I start?” The words slipped out before William could stop himself. But he needed to share some of his feelings with Arel. The man was bent on a relationship without thinking about their complexities. “I love Annabel, but she still has so many fears about life. If she had her way, I think she’d wrap me up like one of her clay figurines and keep me on a shelf, safe and secure from any danger.”
Arel’s face flushed a deep red. “I’m the one responsible for most of her fear. If I hadn’t gone half-mad—”
“Stop it, Arel. If you want to be some continual, contrite sinner, that’s your business, but each of us is responsible for our life.”
“Sorry, I guess I still get confused about it all.”
“Don’t you realize that sometimes craziness is part of something bigger and better?”
“What do you mean?”
“Going up against you on that battlefield was one of the best experiences of my life. It should have been one of your best too. Talk about challenges, we both had something extremely difficult to face, and we faced it. Afterwards, we both knew we not only survived, we were stronger and better for the experience.”
Arel looked down, but a smile slowly spread across his face. “I’ll never forget what you told me when the battle was over. You said I wasn’t broken, that I’d never been broken. Michael used to tell me stuff like that, but when you said it, I heard it. It sunk in.”
“It sunk in because you finally realized it was true.”
“Yes, it was one of the most enlightening moments of my life.”
“And we can have more enlightening moments if we allow ourselves to keep going after what we want.”
“I don’t know about that, but—”
“What is it?”
Arel’s smile slipped away. “Tell me what I should have done with Elise? From what you just said, I feel like I failed her in some way.”
“If you really cared about her well-being, you should have never dated her and led her on.”
“Led her on?”
“Yes, you’re a very charismatic man. The poor thing probably had a crush on you.”
“But she was so distant.”
“People know when they’re being judged and don’t have a chance. But she probably liked you and didn’t want to get hurt.”
“A couple of times, I nearly let my temper get the best of me. I wanted to tell her what a hateful person she was.”
“At least you would have been honest.”
“Should I apologize to her?”
“Let it go. Learn from it. Start being truthful instead of acting like some saint.”
“I’m honest with Claire. I tell her what I feel, that she’s incredible.”
“If you say so.”
“What are you getting at?”
“You’ve decided that she’s perfect, right?”
“Yes.”
“That’s another judgment. It’s how you’ve decided to see her.”
“I can’t help it. When I look at her—”
“You’re in love with love,” William said. “But you need to see past your ideas of perfection and look at Claire, the person. Are the two of you truly compatible? Do you share enough views on life to co-exist in harmony?”
Arel laughed off his question. “She’s smart and dedicated. And if she sees things differently, I’ll adjust.”
William almost commented, but he held his tongue. He was struggling with his own relationship. Why should he think that he had any answers? Still, when he studied Arel’s bright, expectant eyes and boyish expression, his protective side couldn’t be silenced. “I wish you the best, I really do. But please, be careful.”
* * * * *
The small café was one of Annabel’s favorite places for lunch. She sat across from Claire at a table located by a window. Lacey curtains filtered the light and added to the coziness. The eatery had a nice assortment of sandwiches and amazing desserts, including their specialty, Sticky Toffee Pudding. Thinking about its thick, rich, warm toffee sauce helped Annabel forget the morning she’d had with Claire. “I hope you like this place as much as I do.”
Claire tossed back her dark hair and glanced around. “I rarely eat out. It seems like a waste of money when so many people in the world are starving.”
Annabel’s breath caught as she picked up her menu. The thought of starving people made her stomach tighten. How was she supposed to enjoy pudding when others in the world had nothing? The guilt she’d felt during her shopping trip with Claire returned immediately.
Arel’s fiancé seemed to have very definite ideas about Annabel’s conduct. When they were browsing in a small boutique earlier, Annabel had found a dress she liked. Its pretty, blue floral-print would have gone perfectly with a pair of shoes she’d recently bought. As she was taking it to the counter to pay for it, she noticed Claire’s reproachful look. It was so stern and disapproving that Annabel wondered if something was wrong.
When she asked for Claire’s opinion, Claire questioned her. Did Annabel need another dress? Of course, the answer was no. She and William had gone shopping on numerous occasions. William had made sure that Annabel’s closet was filled with an assortment of garments for all occasions. Question number two. Did Annabel understand how the money spent on another dress could help the needy? When Annabel returned a look of confusion, Claire lectured her on personal responsibility.
After Claire finished her lecture, Annabel abandoned the dress and quickly left the shop. She’d hoped that lunch would help both of them relax. They could talk about topics that didn’t involve anything too serious. With starving people topping the conversation, Annabel started to panic.
Claire frowned. “Are you okay? You look a bit wilted.”
Annabel smoothed out the napkin in her lap. “I don’t feel very hungry after all.”
“I thought you said you were famished.”
Before Annabel could answer, the waitress approached their table. “Annabel, so nice to see you again.”
“Hi Dorothy,” Annabel said. “I’m here with my friend, Claire.”
The waitress smiled politely. “What can I get you two today?”
Annabel looked at Claire. “What would you like, Claire?”
Claire snapped the menu shut and handed it to the waitress. “I’ll have a cup of chicken soup and a glass of water, please.”
Annabel hesitated, then handed in her menu too. “I’ll have the same.”
The waitress frowned back. “Really, Annabel? You usually have your favorite, a tuna sandwich, curly fries and coleslaw.”
Annabel kept her eyes averted. “Thanks, but I’ll just have the soup.”
“Annabel, get whatever you usually get,” Claire said in an insistent tone.
Annabel stood up and put a hand to her stomach. It felt very queasy. “Claire, you’re right. I don’t feel well. Would you mind if we leave? I think I need to lie down.”
Dorothy offered a kindly smile. “I’m sorry, dearie. Hope you’re feeling better soon.”
Claire stood up too. “I’m afraid you’d never survive the digs I go on, Annabel. And when I think about some of the remote places I’ve seen, let’s just say you’d fold after the first day.”
Annabel started for the door. “I guess you’re right.”
Once they were outside, Annabel hurried down the sidewalk, but she didn’t get very far before Claire took hold of her arm.
Claire had more advice to impart. “Do you know what I do when I’m not feeling well?”
“No, what’s that?”
“Stand up straight and breathe, Annabel. You have to take in some oxygen and get your blood circulating. You have to take command of your body and let it know what you want.”
As Claire con
tinued with her instructions, Annabel tried to comply obediently. She took a number of deep breaths and stood at attention. But in the back of her mind, she was also counting the minutes until she was back in her own home and out of Claire’s clutches.
* * * * *
William waved farewell as he watched Arel and Claire climb into a taxi. Since the couple would be parting company the next morning, they seemed anxious to spend the rest of the day alone. After his conversation with Arel, he’d returned to a more impartial position. After all, he’d told Arel that people were responsible for themselves. He had to adopt that viewpoint when he thought about Arel and Claire.
He had barely closed the front door when Annabel came tiptoeing in from the hall. When she’d returned from her shopping trip with Claire, she’d complained of feeling sick and having to go to bed. Now, her face was bright and her cheeks were rosy again. “You look like you’re feeling better.”
Annabel paused long enough to give the room a quick once over. “Are they gone?”
“Yes, they just left. I didn’t know you wanted to say goodbye. You looked so ill earlier and—”
“Oh, William, my darling, sweet William!” Annabel sang out as she ran over to him.
Before William had a chance to respond, Annabel flung her arms around him so enthusiastically that he had to brace himself to keep from stumbling backwards. “What’s going on?” he asked with a curious grin.
Annabel hugged him even tighter. “Do you know how wonderful you are?”
William put his arms around her and smiled. “Yes, actually I do, but I didn’t think you’d noticed.”
Annabel closed her eyes and continued to hold on to him. “After spending some time with a very harsh person, I’ve come to my senses.”
“Are you talking about Claire? What happened?”
“Oh, William, how could I have complained about you? You’re gentle and sweet. You have your ideas about life, but you’re not a bully. You’re always taking me out to eat and wanting me to enjoy life. You’re always encouraging me to have faith in myself. You’re the best man in the world.”
“That’s nice to know.”
Annabel pulled back a little. “Claire talked about mysteries the other night. Well, now we have one that needs solving.”
William studied Annabel’s narrowed brows. “What mystery?”
“Maybe it’s me, but I can’t understand how Arel can possibly be in love with that woman. How can he want to spend the rest of his life with someone who nearly drove me crazy after only a few hours?”
Twelve
AREL KNEW THAT that he was dreaming, but he was so angry, he couldn’t wake himself up. The argument he was having with Elise was the worst ever. His dream body had never felt so volatile, like it had been wired up to a bomb and the timer was ready to go off at any moment. His speech was explosive too. “You’re a bloody witch! Except for my spiteful mother, you’re the most, intolerable woman I’ve ever met!”
Elise stood in front of him with her hands on her hips. When she replied, her caustic voice was deafening. “Your mother? She must have been a female viper to give birth to the likes of you!”
“Why can’t you speak in a civil tongue instead of yelling like a banshee?”
“What choice do I have? I’m dealing with a pompous, conceited, arrogant phony!”
“You’re insane! I treated you like a queen in spite of your toxic outlook!”
“That’s a laugh! I thought I had it bad before, but at least the other men I dated showed their colors. But you pretend to be lily white, you lying scum!”
“Have you seen yourself? You belong in a cage, like all the other vicious animals!”
With her face livid with rage, Elise gestured back with her finger.
Arel didn’t think his anger could escalate, but he felt his blood getting so hot, he was afraid it would begin to boil. Luckily, before that happened, someone shook him. He opened his eyes and squinted. As he came awake, he sighed with relief. “Claire?”
“Arel, wake up!”
Arel looked around and realized that he was in their hotel room. “What a nightmare I had,” he gasped.
“I can only imagine from the shouting that you were doing. I was in the bathroom, brushing my teeth, and I heard all this cursing.”
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “I was dreaming about that woman I told you about.”
Claire gave him a sterner look. “Elise?”
Arel tried to slow the pounding in his chest. “Yes, dating her wasn’t one of my smartest moves. I guess I felt sorry for her.”
“So why would you dream about her?”
“It’s William’s fault. He told me I should have confronted her. I think his suggestion got buried in my subconscious.”
“Oh, William, I see. Instead of remodeling rooms and advising you, maybe he should invest his energy in something more productive.
Arel pulled her close. “Forget William, we have planes to catch later. Let’s make the most of the time we have.”
Claire leaned in close and kissed him. “I agree,” she said as she ran her hand over his chest. “I’m going to miss you.”
“Are you sure? When you talk about that project you’re involved in, your eyes light up.”
“They light up because I love my work. You’d understand that feeling if you were involved in something you were passionate about too.”
Arel blinked back awkwardly. His life didn’t measure up to much when he compared it to Claire’s. “When we’re married, maybe you can help me find something worthwhile to do too.”
Claire laughed. “Of course I will.”
* * * * *
Elise hurried to her bedroom, slightly panicked. Her new puppy, Freddie Poo, was protesting his confinement in no uncertain terms. She hated to put the puppy in his doggie crate, but at times, she had no choice. If her writing stalled or her frustration levels soared, she had to vent. She didn’t want the puppy around during those emotional tirades. She was ashamed to have him present when she inflicted more punishment on the trash can. On the plus side, she was getting better at staying calm for longer periods.
What she couldn’t tolerate was hearing Freddie Poo’s cries of distress. The sounds not only grated on her nerves, they made her feel a sense of urgency she’d never felt before. “Fine, I’m here!” she called out as she stopped in front of the puppy’s crate. When she leaned down to look in, two black, round eyes stared back at her. A small paw scratched at the grate. When she hesitated for just a moment, the puppy yowled again.
“You little bugger,” she cooed as she undid the latch. “You know how to get your way, don’t you?”
Once she swung open the door, Freddie Poo bolted forward, tripped over a bit of towel padding and tumbled out. Once he recovered his footing, he immediately came over and pawed at her slipper. She tried to be disgusted, but she could only manage a state of amusement as she scooped him up and held him close. She knew she was getting attached to the little dog, but she couldn’t help it. He was the most adorable creature she’d ever seen.
The doorbell rang as she carried him into the living room. “Coming,” she said in a subdued tone. She was very aware of the puppy’s sensitive ears, especially when he was nestled in his usual spot under her chin.
Life had become more complicated having the puppy around. Feeding him, taking him out, and playing with him took up more of her day than she wanted. She was trying to write a book for goodness sake. However, having Freddie Poo around did have its plus side. She didn’t think about Arel as much. Arel’s friends were a different story.
It was strange, but she liked having Carey and Michael come over for visits. When she opened the door and saw them waiting on the porch, she even gave them a sincere smile. “Thanks for coming,” she said as she gestured them in. “I need to pick your brains again.”
Once the three of them convened in her office, Elise put Freddie down on the floor. As he ran off to explore, Elise explained the cluttered c
ondition of the room. The rug was completely covered with blankets and towels. “Looks like a mess, but Freddie Poo didn’t get his name for nothing. I got wrapped up in the writing yesterday and forgot to take him out.”
“Do you want me to take him out now?” Carey asked as the puppy sniffed at the blankets and pawed enthusiastically.
Elise shook her head. “It’s okay. I took him out fifteen minutes ago. He’s looking for this.” She picked up a chew snack from the desk. “I was saving it. While you’re here, it’ll keep him occupied.”
She crouched down and waved the treat in front of the puppy. “Come here, Freddie.”
Hearing his name, Freddie’s head jerked up, and he looked at Elise. When he saw what she was holding, his short legs were instantly put into forward drive. He ran over, but paused before he went for the treat. When he retrieved it from her hand, he was very careful.
Elise smiled her approval. “See that? He’s so smart. At first he grabbed it like a rude, little scoundrel, but he’s learning manners.”
She stood up and sighed. “Now, for the bad news. I’m not blaming anyone, but—” She paused and looked at Michael.
Michael came to attention. “Bad news?”
“Sorry, Michael, but the puppy idea didn’t work. My heroine fell in love with the dog, but she still wouldn’t give Mason the time of day. Which brings me to another problem. Mason isn’t as well adjusted as I’d hoped he’d be. His father wanted a boy and got a boy, but it didn’t end there. The jerk wants to tell his son how to live his life. Mason is getting sidetracked.”
“What’s your ultimate goal with the situation?” Carey asked.
“I want Mason and Linda to let go of their problems and be happy! Is that too much to ask?”
Michael spoke up. “How realistic do you want your novel to be?”
“It’s a romance, but it’s supposed to be believable.”
“You could rewrite the part about the father.”
“But I don’t want a two dimensional character. Mason has to have a life, some background.”
“Write about him in a way that says he came from a happy home,” Carey suggested.
Elise paused. “Is there such a thing? Really? Does anybody get a break in this world?”
