by C M Thorne
He shook his head and took another drink. “Livia instantly took an interest in me. It was like she saw into my very soul and I found myself freed by her bold presence. She surrounded herself with musicians, artists, the very beautiful, or the very talented. I soon learned that they were her coven, a host of immortals that seemed to live luxuriously throughout the ages, and that she was a vampire, ancient and powerful. I did not know who she truly was until she sired me, however.”
Caleb pulled his legs up onto the chair and rested his chin on his knees, becoming absorbed in the story and how Rainer seemed lost in time, eyes unfocused as if watching the events of his past. He could not help but watch Rainer’s full lips, and the light that appeared to be housed within the rich depths of his honey golden eyes.
“Livia has grown quite cruel during the millennia of her ageless life,” Rainer continued. “I quickly learned after my transition that she only cares for herself and those with the potential to not only be immortal, but to become a part of her collection. I am the only one to not fully bend to her will. I was already growing distant to her and her charms as a human and I think that was why she turned me.”
“Did she ever use compulsion on you?” Caleb blurted out.
Rainer startled, face snapping to the side as his eyes focused in on him. His eyes blazed with a crazed sort of intensity that softened as he gained focused, coming back to the moment and truly seeing Caleb. “No,” he finally responded, eyes lowering to his nearly empty glass. “She does not like to use that gift on those she pursues for her collection. Livia draws you in with who she is, her boldness. Her wildness. It causes a sort of frenzied infatuation in many. She did not sire most until they wanted it, craved it. Until they begged her for it.”
“Did you?” Caleb asked softly into his knees.
Rainer looked up at him slowly, one eyebrow drawn up into a quizzical look. “Did I beg?”
Caleb lifted his head, stomach dropping at the expression on Rainer’s face. “No, no,” he shook his head, “I meant, did you want to be turned?”
The vampire stared at him with an unreadable expression for a very drawn out minute or two, eyes flicking downward finally as he let out a shallow breath. He raised his glass and finished off his drink with a sigh. “I did and I did not,” Rainer responded earnestly. “I had relished in the freedom, in the joy that she and her coven seemed to exude for months, but I grew bored. The more I learned, the more I saw their true nature come out, the more I wanted to leave. To remain human.” He studied the dark wood of the floor as he continued speaking, “I announced that I had to leave Vienne, called home by my uncle. My cousin, who I had grown up with as brother, had been injured and caught some illness. My uncle summoned me home to say goodbye, but Livia could not abide my leaving.”
He shook his head, running a hand through his thick mane of dark hair. “She told me that her immortal blood would heal my cousin. The price was my life. I was to become immortal so that my cousin, my brother may live out the rest of his mortal life. I was desperate for my cousin to be well, so I agreed.” Caleb nodded slowly, watching the pain mask that had descended onto the vampire’s face. “She summoned my cousin to Vienna, under the pretense that he would be brought to the nest physician in the city. Someone who was able to heal even the most hopeless of cases.”
Rainer paused, eyes lost in the past as he stared out the windowed wall behind Caleb, face unmoving and statuesque in it’s flawless look of pain. Caleb shifted, rocking a little on his seat to stop his legs from going numb, not wanting to totally change his position and risk breaking the state that the vampire had fallen into. He could not help himself however and he moved his leg to dangle down over the rug and the vampire’s fiery eyes flicked over to him, breaking the illusion that had been created. He was not a statue. He was living. Or was he? Caleb wasn’t sure if vampires technically were living, in the strictest sense. Old movies always used the term undead, but the news never seemed to use such terms. His father called them the damned. He wanted to ask about it, but now was not the time.
The vampire looked away from the window, tilting his head downward. “Once my cousin reached the city,” Rainer continued, his voice softer, more distant, “he was brought to her home. Livia had drained me of nearly all of my blood the night before after seducing me. I was not tempted by her, but when she made her move, I did not dare risk rebuking her and sacrificing my cousin’s life.” He took a deep breath, closing his eyes. “She had fed me her blood before the dawn and then suffocated me. I awoke later in the day in transition, locked in Livia’s room with my cousin.”
His nostrils flared in anger as he turned his head toward the fireplace. “She taunted me for hours before I gave in to the bloodlust.” He clenched his hands into fists, knuckles going from their regular pale white to the pure, shocking color of bone. “I killed him. I did not know how to stop,” Rainer practically whispered as he made his confession.
Caleb had the feeling that he had never told anyone this story in its entirety. It still felt fresh. Raw and bleeding in the vampire’s memory. “That’s awful,” Caleb said quietly.
Rainer looked over at him, eyes now devoid of emotion as his face and body relaxed. “No,” he replied flatly, “that is the nature of a vampire.”
“I don’t think that’s your nature,” Caleb countered quickly, not being able to stop his thoughts from flying out of his mouth.
Rainer scoffed, “You do not know me, Caleb.”
“Call it intuition then,” he said after a beat. “And I am starting to get to know you. I don’t think you’re cruel.” He paused, looking over the vampire’s blank face, “I don’t think you’re a monster.”
His eyes narrowed before he looked away. “I have done many things in my four and a half centuries that would shock you then.”
“I doubt that,” Caleb retorted.
The vampire glanced at Caleb, one eyebrow cocked as he let the silence in the room grow. Caleb had not noticed just how silent the penthouse could be, even in the middle of such a busy city. “You are too kind,” Rainer broke the silence with soft, hushed words.
His eyes had softened once more and Caleb bit at his lower lip, resisting the urge to physically melt into a puddle in front of the vampire. Rainer was gorgeous, but when he looked at Caleb like that, he almost couldn’t bear it. He broke eye contact, heart thundering in his chest, threatening to give him away. Could Rainer hear the physical reaction he caused in Caleb? The thought made his body go cold.
“Especially after everything that has happened to you,” Rainer continued a moment later, “to your family, because of me and my club.”
“It isn’t your fault,” Caleb protested, settling his eyes back on Rainer.
“I have brought the wrath of a very old and very powerful vampire down on this city,” Rainer rose and grabbed his glass, heading toward the kitchen, “on you. I have only carelessness to blame.”
“The issue of the security in the restrooms is not something you knew to fix until now,” Caleb protested once more, scrambling out of his seat and padding over to the counter.
Rainer looked back at him over his shoulder amused, “It has been brought up before.” He set the tumbler down in the sink, letting it fill with hot water. “I voted against extra measures like cameras.” He shook his head, turning and looking into Caleb’s eyes. “I deeply regret my decision and I will ensure that something like this never happens to another one of our patrons again.”
“Well, that’s all you can do,” Caleb stepped around the counter into the actual kitchen. “You can’t continue to blame yourself. You couldn’t have known this exact thing could happen.”
“Still,” Rainer replied, looking down at his hands absently.
Caleb took a step forward, heart pounding and feeling completely cold. Rainer looked up at him as the distance between them shrank. He didn’t know what he was doing, but he felt the need to comfort Rainer. The impulse almost made him reach out. Almost made him step closer. Cale
b realized what he was doing and froze, losing the nerve to get closer. He could have sworn that Rainer looked expectant, as if he wanted Caleb to come closer, not willing to close the distance himself. Was he interested in him? His eyes flicked away and Rainer stepped back into the counter, turning around and breaking the moment to dump the tumbler out in the sink.
“It’s inexcusable,” Rainer growled lowly.
Caleb blinked hard, not realizing what Rainer was talking about for a moment. “Henri would have attacked me outside the club, if it hadn’t have been the men’s room,” he tried to rationalize, to make Rainer see that the situation was not his fault.
Rainer’s body visibly tensed as he clutched at the age of the granite countertop and the inside of the stainless steel sink. “Perhaps, the club isn’t a safe place then.”
“That’s not what I was saying,” Caleb defended, moving closer and reaching out. “I just meant-” his fingertips brushed the fabric of Rainer’s shirt and he whirled around.
Rainer was fuming, eyes blazing and chest heaving as he looked down at Caleb. His insides hollowed out in fear or anticipation, Caleb wasn’t sure. He swore the vampire was staring down at his lips. Or was it his neck? Before he could move or say anything, Rainer blurred away, moving away from Caleb with his vampiric speed. The front door of the condo slammed a second later, making Caleb jump.
He had not meant to upset Rainer. He had been trying to reassure him, but it seemed to have the opposite effect. An effect that led to the vampire exploding with not just anger, but hunger. His burning amber eyes had looked so ravenous, like he had wanted to tear in his neck and sate the fire that had risen up. Perhaps it was all vampire’s nature. Caleb could not help but feel that there had been moments before, however. Moments that weren’t hunger. At least, not hunger for his blood.
Shaking his head, he stepped over to the sink, as the water was still pouring from the faucet and splashing around in the now clean glass tumbler. Caleb was lost in the running water for a moment watching it as he thought of what he could have done differently. Could he had calmed Rainer? Was there reasoning with an angry, hungry vampire? Cal honestly did not know. He blinked and moved to turn the sink off. As he did, he looked down and noticed that the edge of the counter was cracked and that the outline of Rainer’s fingers had been indented into the steel sink.
CHAPTER 9
Caleb felt like Rainer had been avoiding him since their talk about the vampire’s past had turned into Rainer trying to blame himself for not being able to protect Caleb. It had been days and they barely spoke. The vampire only checked in to make sure Caleb was eating enough. It was entirely frustrating, but Caleb did not know how to get the vampire to do anything else. He never knew how Rainer was feeling or what he was thinking, so how was he going to get him to open back up? None of Caleb’s attempts had come close to even get a flicker of reaction before the vampire sped away to his room or to leave the penthouse.
Rainer had ordered him food from a local steakhouse for dinner and Caleb was washing the dishes he had used, absently thinking of how the vampire had only made appearances to ask him what he wanted and then to answer the door. He always did that, flashing out from his room to get the door before Caleb could even respond to the ringing bell. He shook his head, slamming his large white plate into the sleek dishwasher, thinking that Rainer could at least trust him to answer the door himself. He understood that it wasn’t technically his place, but he could at least get food from a delivery person.
His phone chirped from his place on the counter near the large sink. He looked over and saw that it was yet another text from Lizzie. Between her and the pastor, Caleb thought he would go mad. He had contemplated several times getting a new number so the pastor would stop leaving voicemails telling him that he and the congregation were praying for Caleb to return to God’s path. One message had actually been the sound of his father’s prayer circle praying for him. He didn’t even bother listening to more than a few seconds of each of them. Lizzie was sending messages, hounding him about how much pain their father was in and how much she missed him. The longer he went without messaging back, however led to her criticizing his choices and expressing worry that he was going to get himself killed. She thought Rainer had abducted him, seducing him to be his personal blood bag or something. Though that was so far from the truth. The vampire wasn’t coming anywhere near him in fact.
He grabbed the fork and knife from the bottom of the sink with a little too much force and felt the sharp sting of the sharp steak knife slip through the skin of his forefinger down across his palm. He yelped and let go, raising his hand up as angry red blood welled up along the long, jagged line. He breathed through clenched teeth and stuck his hand under the faucet, reaching with his other hand to turn the warm water too cold, which felt soothing. The air seemed to shift, a feeling Caleb had quickly adjusted to, not needing to look up to see that Rainer had blurred into the kitchen.
“I’m fine,” he told the vampire, eyes downward, watching the scarlet ribbons run down through the water and swirl around the bottom of the sink before disappearing down the drain. “I just cut myself on the knife wh-”
He was cut off by the sudden presence of the vampire next to him, reaching with one pale hand to grab his bleeding hand from the water to look it over. Caleb looked up into the tall man’s face, half shrouded in shadow from his thick hair falling around his face as he bent to look at the cut. His amber eyes were aglow with some unreadable emotion. Was it hunger? Impatience even? Caleb was about to say something when Rainer’s brow furrowed and pulled his hand further up, forcing him to turn away from the sink and more toward him.
“It’s slowed down,” Rainer said softly.
Caleb blinked hard, pulling himself away from staring up into the vampire’s eyes. “What?”
“Your healing,” he answered, lowering Caleb’s hand, but not letting it go, eyes still trained downward. “My blood must be leaving your system.”
He looked at his hand. The long cut was puckered pink around the white edges, leaking thin red blood as it looked like it was trying to knit itself back together. It wasn’t working even a fraction as fast as when Rainer had given him blood nearly a week before. “Huh,” Caleb huffed out a breath and look back at Rainer as the vampire rose his free hand to his mouth.
Without a word, the vampire bit down on his thumb with one of his sharp fangs, burning eyes not leaving Caleb’s palm as he lowered his thumb down. It welled with dark blood, which Rainer lightly pressed into Caleb’s cut and ran it down from his finger across his palm. The blood set to work instantly, healing the cut and spreading a tingling warmth over his skin, banishing the pain that had been shooting his hand. The vampire’s cool finger was an unexpectedly cooler across the healing warmth radiating across his palm, making Caleb shiver.
Rainer’s eyes flicked up and bore into his own, trying to see what made Caleb react as he did. “Are you alright?” he asked softly.
It must have been the days of barely seeing the vampire, but Caleb suddenly felt himself lost, overcome with the desire to be even closer to Rainer. It not only stole words from him, but made him forget that he even needed to respond. He wanted to run his hand up Rainer’s arm, to touch him. To feel him closer. Caleb wanted to run a hand through his thick, dark hair, falling messily around the vampire’s face. He imagined pulling him closer, raising up on his toes while looping his hand around the vampire’s neck to bring him into a kiss, but Rainer spoke, breaking the fantasy.
“Caleb?”
He shook his head and looked away, “Yes, I’m better now.” He pulled his hand away from the vampire’s cool grip reluctantly, feeling immensely embarrassed as he flushed. “Thank you.”
“What happened?” Rainer asked, looking down into the sink.
Caleb sighed, stepping away, “I wasn’t paying close enough attention and grabbed the steak knife.”
The vampire turned his head to Cal, face unreadable for a moment yet again. “You need to be
more careful.” Rainer shook his head.
“I am plenty careful!” Caleb defended, emotion welling up in his chest disproportionate to Rainer’s words. He surprised himself, not knowing where the reaction came from.
Rainer whirled around, eyes glowing as he looked him over, “Clearly you aren’t! Such things make me worried to let you leave. There is a very real threat out in the city now, hunting me,” he paused, inhaling sharply, “hunting you.” He motioned to the sink, “And now you’re being reckless.”
“I wasn’t being reckless!”
“Then what?” Rainer narrowed his eyes, leaning back against the sink.
“I just,” Cal looked down at his feet, bare on the dark flooring of the kitchen, “my mind was just preoccupied.”
“So preoccupied you didn’t realize you were grabbing a knife hard enough to cut halfway through your hand?” Rainer spit, not looking back at him.
“Hey!” Caleb scoffed. “It wasn’t that bad!”
“Yes,” Rainer whirled back around, “it was! What was left of my blood had been working to get it to that point. It was too much. That’s why you needed more.” Rainer’s eyes dimmed and he looked past Cal. “You might need more of you’re going to be like this.”
“I’m not being like anything!” Caleb resisted the urge to stomp away, turning to pace the kitchen, nerves feeling frayed. It was almost like he was having a fight with his sisters, or worse, his father. That’s how he was reacting, a hard lump forming in his throat as everything Rainer said spurned rage in his gut. “Maybe,” he stopped, turning to face the vampire, feeling defiant. “Maybe if I wasn’t preoccupied, I wouldn’t be accidentally hurting myself!”
