“Oh my God,” I sob, stumbling back until Rylee manages to get me on a chair.
I knew there was a possibility that he’d be angry, but I never expected…
A fresh glass of water is placed in front of me before Rylee drops down beside me.
“He’ll be okay. Just let him cool off, then he’ll listen.”
“You think?” I ask through tear-filled eyes.
She chews on her bottom lip for a second. “Sure.” She sounds about as uncertain as I feel, and it doesn’t ease the dread filling me.
“I was just trying to do something nice. To help him out. I knew I should have told him but—” My voice cracks and I stop.
“I know. And when he calms down, he’ll see that.” I can see the question in her eyes, but we’re not close enough for her to feel like she’s able to pry.
“His arrears and six months’ rent.”
“Jesus, Harlow. Are you some kind of secret millionaire or something?”
I shrug. “Or something. I’ve got inheritance,” is all I give as a reason. It’s not a lie. It’s just the kind of inheritance that just keeps on giving.
Reaching out a shaky hand, I take a sip of the cool water and try to get myself under control. Everything was going too well. Everything was too perfect. This was always going to happen. I was just too blissfully unaware as I enjoyed the perks of finally having a man who understood me.
“Just give him some time. If I’ve learned anything from Colton, it’s that men are almost as complicated as women, they just don’t like to show it. Let him cool down and then, when he least expects it, prove to him just how much he needs you. Rock his world the way it needs rocking and prove your place beside him.”
I nod at her, in awe that she manages to look at that man every day and not be a total fumbling idiot like I am every time I’m so much as in the same room as him.
“I don’t know much about him, but Corey seems like a good man. Austin sure has good things to say, but he’s also alluded to a dark past. Just be gentle with him. He’ll figure things out.”
“I hope you’re right,” I mutter.
“I know you’ve got Bailey, but if you need anything, even just a chat, I’m here.” I offer her a weak smile so she knows I hear. “And,” she says, pulling my clipboard closer, “this is really incredible. It’s going to be a huge success, Harlow. Focus on this while he—”
“I’m so sorry.” Sandy comes rushing back in, looking panicked. “Harlow, there’s a call on line one for you. It’s urgent.”
I stare at her and my body turns cold. I recognize that grief-stricken look on her face. I know it too well.
I race to the phone, but I already know the words I’m about to hear. My hand trembles as I lift it to my ear.
Even as I wait for a voice, my body begins to shut down. This kind of stuff is easier to deal with when you’re numb.
“Hello.” My voice is hollow when it comes out.
“Is that Harlow Winters?”
“Speaking.”
“I’ve got you down as Mrs. Winslow’s emergency contact. She’s currently being admitted to—”
I don’t even wait for her to say the hospital name; I know where she is. “I’m coming. Tell her I’m coming right now.”
I slam the phone down and run for the room.
“Harlow, wait,” Rylee calls.
“It’s my aunt. She’s in hospital.”
“Shit. Let me drive you. You can’t—”
“Whatever, but I’m going right now.”
“Okay, I’m coming.”
I fling the door open. Teddy had discreetly left during my previous meltdown to allow Rylee to deal with me and cut us off from prying eyes. I was grateful for his compassion.
I don’t see the hallway before me, I just take off.
That is, until I come to an abrupt stop as I crash into something—or someone. Warm hands grip my upper arms to steady me, and when I look up, I find those mesmerizing green eyes staring down at me.
“Harlow, are you okay?” Colton asks, concern lacing his voice. “I just saw Corey and—”
“Let’s go,” Rylee announces. “Ah, perfect timing, Ace. We need to get Harlow to the hospital, now.”
“Shit, are you okay?” He looks me over like there might be something wrong with me.
“Her aunt’s been taken in.” They share a look that makes me wonder how much they really know about my life before Colton jumps into action.
“Well, let’s go. You ready for a fast ride?” he asks me. On any other day, I’d blush like a tomato, but today I barely register his words as I follow him with Rylee by my side to the exit.
I’m on autopilot as I climb into the back of the white Range Rover I’m directed to. Both Colton and Rylee talk to me. I hear the sound of their words, but I don’t register any of them. The only time I speak is to give directions, but it soon becomes apparent that Colton knows exactly where he’s going, so I fall silent as I watch the world outside pass in a blur.
It feels like only minutes later, Colton is pulling up in front of the hospital so I can climb out.
“I’ll park and meet you inside.”
“No, no. You two can go. I’ll be fine.”
Totally ignoring my words, Rylee pushes the door open and steps out beside me. “I’ll message you where we are.”
Colton nods before she closes the door and links her arm through mine.
I walk into that hospital not knowing if my aunt is dead or alive. She’s here, under this roof, with terminal cancer. Nothing good is coming out of this, but just how bad is it?
Seeing as I cut the woman off on the phone before I had a chance to find out where she is, we have to stop by reception to find out. But in only moments, Rylee has me in the elevator and we’re riding to the fourth floor.
“You don’t have to do this.”
“I know, but I want to.”
“Hi, I’m here for Mrs. Winslow,” I say to the nurse who’s sitting behind the desk when we walk into the ward.
“Perfect timing, the doctor is just with her. I’m assuming you’re…” She looks down at her computer. “Harlow?”
“Yes.”
“Please follow me.”
“I’ll wait here,” Rylee says, pointing to a couple of chairs.
“You can go, it’s okay.”
“No. I’ll call Bailey too.”
“Thank you,” I mouth as I rush behind the nurse to find out what’s going on.
It’s not the first time I’ve seen my aunt hooked up to machines in a hospital bed, but unlike previously, this time I have no idea if she’ll get through it.
“Your aunt had a severe seizure. She was very lucky that it happened while she was in the garden and her neighbor saw her.”
Guilt slams into me. I should have been there. I should have been keeping an eye on her, but I was enjoying myself with Corey.
“She was unconscious when the paramedics got to her. There are no guarantees with anything here, Ms…”
“Harlow.”
“Harlow,” the doctor nods. “But with your aunt’s medical history and the progression of her disease, I would be surprised if she recovers from this. It’s still early days, but the signs aren’t good. I’m so sorry.”
A sob rumbles up my throat as I stare at her looking old, weak and tiny in the hospital bed.
“C-can I sit with her?”
“Of course. Take all the time you need. Call if you need anything.”
He points to a red button that I glance at, and after a few seconds he completes the notes he was writing when I entered and leaves me to it.
Blowing out a shaky breath, I pull the empty chair closer to my aunt’s side. I find her hand that’s resting on top of the stark white sheet and take it in mine. It’s cold and, I swear, thinner than the last time I held it.
“I’m so sorry,” I whisper around the ball of emotion clogging my throat.
I’d told her time and time again that I’d move in.
That I’d keep an eye on her and make sure she had everything she needed. But she always refused. And I let her. I should have pushed it further. I should have been there. It shouldn’t have been down to the neighbors to rescue her.
What if she weren’t in the garden?
A sob hits me at the thought. If I forgot to ring and check on her at lunch and then got distracted by Corey after work. I might not have touched base with her today… and she’d have been…
I lose my fight with my tears and drop my forehead to her shoulder as I cry.
I knew this day was coming. I thought I’d somewhat prepared myself for it. But I didn’t realize that nothing could possibly compare to this agonizing moment. She’s all the family I’ve got left, and there is literally nothing I can do to save her right now. No amount of money in the world would be able to keep her here with me.
It would be selfish to even try.
She’s made her wishes very clear from the first time she was diagnosed. When her time came, she wanted to go with dignity. I agreed—what else could I do? But I never could have imagined back then what this moment would feel like, knowing that she’s slipping away from me.
The minutes pass with the beeping of the machines around me and my aunt’s seemingly shallowing breaths.
I forget about everything else, about Corey’s anger, about work and the charity gala, and just focus on this moment, hoping like hell that she knows that I’m here, that I’m supporting her in the only way that I can.
Nurses come and go, checking her vitals, but none of them give me any kind of indication that things are improving. With each visit, any hope I had that the doctor might have been wrong starts to dwindle away until all that’s left is despair.
“Harlow.” The sound of my name barely registers, and it’s not until I’m physically pulled from the chair and into my best friend’s arms that I realize I’m no longer alone. “I’m so sorry it took me so long to get here,” she whispers into my ear, and she holds me.
“She’s… she’s going, B.”
“I know, honey. I know.”
When we part, Bailey’s cheeks are almost as tear-stained as mine.
She takes my face in her hands and stares into my eyes. “It’s going to be okay.”
I nod at her. I know she’s not trying to tell me that my aunt will be okay, no one can do that, but she’s telling me that I’m strong enough, that I can do this and survive.
Bailey drags over the other chair in the room so she can sit beside me.
“Here, it’s got all the extras. Thought you could probably use them.” She hands me a Starbucks cup that I didn’t even realize she’d brought in with her.
“Thank you,” I mutter, popping the top off and looking down at the cream and marshmallows hiding beneath.
We sit in silence while we sip on our drinks, lost in our thoughts.
“Don’t you think the smell in this place is stronger than ever?” I ask Bailey when the silence and the incessant beeping becomes too much to bear.
“Uh… smells like normal to me.”
I nod. I’ve probably just been sitting surrounded by it for too long. Although I’ve no idea how long I’ve actually been here.
“Have they said anything about timings or…” Bailey trails off. She wants to ask the question about as much as I want to hear the answer.
“Nope. All they’ve said is that they don’t think she’ll wake up. But it’s all guesswork, really.”
“Would you like me to get you anything? Call anyone… Corey perhaps?”
“That probably wouldn’t be a good idea.”
Her brows rise. “But—”
“I fucked it up.”
“You fucked it up? Wow, I wasn’t expecting it to happen that way around.” She says it as a joke, and on any other day I might be amused by it, but not today.
“I tried to help, and he’s taken it the wrong way. He turned up at work earlier, pissed off.”
“What did you do?”
I blow out a breath, not really wanting to tell Bailey his secrets, but I know that I’m not going to get out of it.
“He’s been struggling money-wise. He’s got family issues, and he’s supporting them instead of looking after himself.”
“Oh God, Harlow. What did you do?” she asks again, knowing me well enough to know my penchant for helping everyone I can.
“I paid his overdue rent…”
“Harlow.”
“And another six months’ rent.”
“Jesus. You didn’t tell him either, did you?”
I shake my head. “He stormed into our meeting, shouting about not being a charity case.”
“Fucking hell. You should have told him. Or at least offered.”
“He wouldn’t have accepted it. He was going to be evicted, B. I had to do something.”
“I get it. I do. But—”
“He doesn’t,” I finish for her. “I told him about my family. About how they…” I hiccup, unable to say the words while surrounded by too much death already.
“Really?” Pride lights up her features.
“It felt good, actually. I felt lighter. He was incredible. He…” I trail off, thinking about just how sweet and gentle he was. How he gave me exactly what I needed in that moment. “I don’t want it to be over,” I admit. “I think… I think I’m falling for him.”
“You think?” she asks with a quirked brow.
“Oh shush. Do you have to look so smug?”
“I’m just glad you’re the one with the man problems for once.”
“Great, thanks,” I mutter, making her chuckle.
“He’ll come around. It was probably just a shock. It’s not the kind of surprise that most people can afford to do for the guy they’re dating.
“Give it a few days and he’ll be begging for you to come back. You mark my words. That man is obsessed with you.”
“We’ll see,” I whisper. “He’s not exactly my top priority right now.” I look at my aunt, who’s still lying there in the same condition as when I raced through the door earlier.
Something tells me I’m in this for the long haul.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Harlow
I take up residence in the uncomfortable chair by my aunt’s beside for four days. Four long days full of endless nurses and doctor’s visits. Of sympathetic looks from Bailey and Rylee when they turn up with decent coffee and try to convince me to leave.
The doctor said I could stay as long as I liked, and I’m taking him up on the offer. I wasn’t there for her when she needed me most, there’s no way in hell I’m leaving her now. I’d never forgive myself.
“Any change?” Bailey asks when she stops off on her way home from a shift at The House.
“They think we’re at the end. Vitals are dropping.”
“Shit.”
“It’s okay. It’s what she would want,” I say, trying to hold my voice steady. Nothing about this is okay, but at least she’s not suffering. It could have been much worse.
“I just stopped in to bring you this.” She hands over a bag and a coffee. “I know you won’t eat otherwise. I need to go and do a few things, but I’ll be back later, okay?”
“Sure, thank you. How many shots of coffee are in this?” I ask when the strong scent hits my nose. My stomach turns over at the smell, reminding me that I can’t remember the last time I ate.
“It’s just a standard cappuccino, H.” She narrows her eyes at me. “Are you feeling okay?”
I can’t help but think it’s a stupid question. I’ve not left this room in four days. I’ve been sleeping in a chair and only nibbled on some of the food she’s turned up with. I’m only wearing different clothes from when I arrived because she brought them for me.
“No, I’m really fucking not.” My voice cracks with emotion and exhaustion.
Unfazed by my outburst, Bailey reaches over and takes my hand, squeezing in support.
“You really need to come home to sleep.”<
br />
I glance over my shoulder at my aunt. “I will… soon.”
Bailey nods and continues to hold my hand. “I’ll be back later, okay?” She squeezes again before dropping a kiss to my cheek.
“Thank you,” I whisper as she walks away.
Sitting back in the chair that has become my home, I take a sip of coffee. The warmth soothes me, but much like the smell, I don’t get the joy I usually do when the taste hits me.
Fucking hell, I need some sleep.
Nibbling at the pastry, I watch my aunt sleep, wondering if today is going to be the day I’m forced to walk out of here and leave her behind.
For her sake, I hope it is. Guilt swamps me at having such thoughts, but I know it’s what she wants, and I need to think about her right now, not me. She always told me that when the time came, she didn’t want it to drag on. I remember her telling me horror stories from the TV or newspapers where people ended up in hospitals and care homes for months as the disease slowly ate away at their bodies. I shudder at the thought.
As hard as it is to accept her wishes, to allow her the peace she craves. I know she’s right. I’d want the exact same thing.
I curl back up in the only position I’ve found that’s vaguely comfortable and, with the beeping of the machine in my ears, I drift off to sleep.
It’s fitful and full of nightmares involving losing my aunt and Corey simultaneously.
I can see myself curled up in this chair as a team of nurses and doctors come racing into my aunt who’s still lying lifeless on the bed.
They do all the checks I’m now used to them doing, but the atmosphere surrounding them is different, the looks on their faces are different.
My heart starts to race, knowing what they’re telling me without needing words. This is it. This is the end.
I wake with a start, my heart still trying to pound out of my chest.
It was just a dream.
Just a dream.
Until I open my eyes and find the exact image that was just in my head, only now it’s before me as two nurses and a doctor stand beside my aunt.
“No,” I cry. “No, please.”
I scramble from the chair and over to the bed. I take her hand in mine. It’s cold, but then it has been since I first arrived here.
Inked: A Driven World Novel (The Driven World) Page 20
