by G. K. Brady
Chapter 33
Guilt and Gifts
Ellie juggled a scorching-hot cookie sheet in unwieldy oven mitts when the knock came. “It’s open,” she yelled. Casper, who’d been licking her chops since the aromatic cookies had been freed from the oven, whimpered, obviously torn. Continue in her sit-squirm, hoping for a treat to hit the floor, or run to the door and put major licks on Dave?
“If I were you,” Ellie whispered to the dog, “I’d go for the licks. Much more satisfying.”
“I brought company,” his deep voice boomed. This made up Casper’s mind, and she bolted for the front door. Yips and yaps ensued.
Ellie set the tray down on a rack and tossed the mitts to the counter on her way out of the kitchen. Dave stood framed by the closed front door, bags in hand, a beanie on his head, and a grin on his face as he watched Casper cavort with a black-and-white Australian shepherd mix. Though she’d spent the night and morning with Dave, her heart bumped a little harder and a whole lot faster at the sight of him. Hubba hubba! Merry Christmas to me!
“Is this Benny?” It dawned on her that with Benny came Nicole. Her pulse jumped for an entirely different reason.
The dog looked up at her and grinned, its pink tongue lolling, before turning back to Casper’s persistent nose.
“Yeah, and I think I’m jealous. My girl Casper’s totally ignoring me.”
Ellie sidestepped the pretzel-twisting sniffing dogs and threw her arms around his square shoulders, rising on tiptoe to kiss him. “Well, I won’t ignore you.” A spicy floral scent jammed her nostrils, and she reared back.
He cinched his arms around her, but with his hands full, she easily eluded his hold. “Hey,” he protested. “You just said you wouldn’t ignore me!”
“No, but you smell like a perfume counter, and I don’t want any of it on me.”
His eyebrows shot to his forehead, and he seemed to freeze up.
Damn, that’s a guilty look. She crossed her arms, like shields folding over her vulnerable heart. “If you’ve got Benny, I can only assume Nicole came by.”
“Uh, can I put some of this stuff down?”
“Sure.” She shrugged and pivoted back toward the kitchen, feeling foolish for reacting the way she did. She rubbed her sternum as if it would drive the hurt from her heart. You have no claim, so knock it off already. Easy, breezy, remember? Besides, this is Christmas, so lighten up.
It was one thing to give herself little speeches, but quite another to believe them. She braced herself against the counter as he deposited bags on her breakfast table.
He gave her a tentative smile. “I think I got here just in time. Those cookies smell fan-fucking-tastic.”
Her eyes were drawn to the beanie. It looked especially soft. “Nice beanie.”
He snatched it off his head so fast he nearly gave her whiplash. “Forgot I was wearing it,” he grunted.
Weird reaction. Why is he acting like a groom with his hand up a bridesmaid’s dress? Reality struck her like a thunderclap. A gift from Charlize’s double—the ex. Or is she really an ex?
Something Sonoma said about Dave being susceptible to Nicky reeling him back in poked Ellie’s raw spots. Was he still in love with Nicole? Had she realized her mistake and was now making a play to get him back? Not that Ellie could blame her. Invisible steely ropes wound around her chest, her throat, making it suddenly hard to breathe.
Spinning the beanie on one finger, he studied her as if he was calculating how to frame what he would say next. “Yes, as you guessed, Nicky did stop by.”
Ellie mustered as neutral a voice as she could, happy that it didn’t quaver. “I thought she wasn’t bringing Benny over for a few more days?”
He flung the beanie on the table and scratched the back of his head. “I guess her plans changed. Maybe she was letting me have him a little longer as a Christmas present.” A snort left him.
“Is that beanie”—Ellie pointed at the offending hat—“also a Christmas present?”
Hazel eyes drilled hers. “Yes. I meant to leave it behind, but I totally spaced it was on my head.”
“Looks soft.”
“Cashmere, apparently.”
Ellie drew in a quiet breath. “So what did you give her?” God, she sounded like a shrew conducting a cross-examination.
He shrugged a shoulder. “Nothing much. Just a cheap bracelet I saw when Sonoma and I were out shopping. I had to get her something, and she always liked jewelry, so …”
Ellie ignored how his words caused a rip inside. “And the perfume? Did you spray that on, or did she?”
He heaved out a breath. “She hugged me.”
Ellie’s eyebrows crawled up her forehead. “That must have been quite the hug to leave a scent that strong behind.”
“Well, shit. I probably should’ve taken a shower before I came over, but I was already running late.”
Not the reassurance Ellie had hoped for, and her heart thudded while her mind leapt to the reasons he might need a shower. Even as she fought the urge to disintegrate a little inside, she questioned if she had a right to expect reassurance from him in the first place.
When she didn’t respond, he waggled his eyebrows. “I could take a shower now and have you scrub the smell off me.”
She clamped her mouth shut to keep it from dropping open. While she didn’t believe he’d actually screwed Nicole—he would have definitely taken that shower before coming over—she couldn’t stop from wondering if he’d wanted to. Or how much he wanted to succumb to whatever hold Nicky had on him … because how hot would a hug have to be to smear that much scent on him? Her head spun in a vortex of emotions.
“Okay, so no couple’s shower,” he said. “I’m gonna check on the dogs.” He took one of the bags with him.
No sooner had she puffed out a breath than he was back without the bag, but with both dogs in tow. “They’re getting along great. So who are the cookies for?”
Her eyes darted to the cookie sheet she needed to unload. “Um, I was gonna pack some up for my neighbors.”
“None for me?”
“Maybe a few, depending on how nice you are.”
He leaned forward, grabbed her hand, and pulled her close. Twining his fingers with hers, he anchored her in front of him, and his other hand tugged her ponytail loose. “How about this?” His voice was sinfully low, seductive, like his fingers working through her hair, stroking her neck. “Is this nice enough?”
The cloying perfume invaded her senses, and her stomach revolted. She turned her head to keep from inhaling it.
He placed a knuckle under her chin and turned her head so she had to look at him—which was when she noticed a smudge of shiny pink below his jaw. She reached out and traced it with her fingertips. Sticky. “What’ve you got on your neck?” Please tell me it’s not lip gloss.
“Hmm?” He craned his head and looked at her fingers. “I don’t see anything.” He tried to tug her closer, but she pressed her hands on his chest. A half-smile played on his face. “Do I smell that bad?”
“It’s just … the perfume’s really strong.”
“Ah shit. Sorry. Nose blind. I don’t even smell it. I’ll hop in the shower and be right back.”
Her eyes followed him as he walked away. He doesn’t smell it because he’s used to it. Benny watched him forlornly, and she crouched down to comfort the dog, putting her disconcerting thoughts on hold.
Ellie managed to keep those thoughts at bay the rest of that afternoon, aided by sappy Christmas music, trimming the tree, two silly dogs, cookie baking, and her hunky baking assistant slash taste tester who smelled shower-fresh and kissed her stupid every chance he got. Stupid was a welcome state of mind.
“Ready for our date?” he asked after she returned from delivering her cookies next door.
“I think so. Will the dogs be okay alone, do you think?”
“Are you kidding? Look at those two.”
Sure enough, they were curled up beside each other, their backs bu
tted together as though they were lifelong littermates. She smiled wistfully at the scene. Benny was such a sweet dog, and her heart ached for him and for Dave. Nicole is a piece of work. Ah, but it was Christmas Eve, a time to be charitable. Besides, Ellie reminded herself, there was no room for thoughts of Nicole.
Though it was only 5:30 when Dave pulled up to a gate, darkness shrouded the starless sky. He fiddled with his phone, the gate opened, and he guided his truck toward a line of storage units with garage doors built into them. They passed a building displaying a sign that read, “Sterling Luxury Garage Condos.”
Ellie grinned. “You keep your cars in a condo?”
Eyes focused ahead, he replied, “I think they call them that because you actually buy the garage, just like you buy a condo to live in.”
She cocked an eyebrow as he slowed. “Is your cars’ condo heated, like a regular condo?”
A glance at his phone, and he thumbed something. A tall, double-wide garage door set among others rolled up. “Not only is it heated, but it has a work area with a lift where I can tinker, a kitchenette, a TV, couch, and a bathroom with a shower.” As if on cue, light flooded a huge garage, and he pulled into an empty slot, coming nose to nose with a covered vehicle. The garage door rolled back down and closed behind them.
A laugh burst from her. “Oh Lordy, it’s a luxury, off-site man cave! Entertain here much?”
With a wide grin, he killed the engine and opened the door. “That’s exactly what it is, and no, you’re the first person I’ve ever brought here.”
A frisson of delight traveled through her bloodstream.
He scrolled through his phone again, and Elvis demanded a little more action and a lot less conversation through speakers suspended from the ceiling. One corner of Dave’s mouth tipped up. “C’mon. I have something I want to show you.”
She stepped out of the truck, surprised at how warm the air around her was, and her eyes widened as they swept the cavernous garage. License plates, fine art featuring cars, and vintage neon signs amidst an assortment of hockey memorabilia covered walls that weren’t otherwise stacked with gleaming red metal cabinets. The floor, done in black and gray checkerboard with a red border, was pristine. The space was the polar opposite of his sterile town house, and she drank in the details steeped in Essence of Dave.
“Have you ever lived here?” She strolled past a section that resembled a studio apartment, complete with small kitchen, man-sized leather couch, recliners, tables, area rug, a huge wall-mounted TV, and a gaming system.
He pulled the cover off a turquoise-and-white Chevrolet Nomad with chrome details. “I’ve been known to spend a night or two here.” He bent to buff a strip of chrome with the sleeve of his flannel shirt. “What do you think?”
“It’s beautiful!”
“It’s a project car, but it’s drivable now.” He hefted the hood and wedged a rod in place to hold it up.
She peered inside, standing close enough to feel the heat coming off his body. “Looks like the original engine. Two-sixty-five?”
“Yep.”
“Three-speed manual? Four?” She moved to the driver’s side door and scanned the interior. “Oh wow! Not a manual at all. A Power Glide transmission. How cool is that? And God, I love the old gauges.” Now she was back at the hood, and she stuck her head in a little deeper while he held up his phone with a flashlight app shining into the engine compartment.
She glanced over her shoulder at him. “Are you planning to restore it to its original configuration? Do all the serial numbers match?”
He grinned. “They all match, but I’m toying with turning it into a hot rod.”
She withdrew and dusted off her hands. “I’m guessing you’d drop in a three-fifty crate motor?”
“That’s my thought. Do you have any better suggestions?”
She ambled around the car. “God, no. The exterior does need some love, though, doesn’t it? Were you planning to do all the work yourself?”
“I’d like to, but it takes a lot of time. Maybe it’d go faster if you helped me.” He removed the rod and lowered the hood.
Her eyes flew to his, and her insides turned warm and gooey with the signal that comment broadcast. “I don’t know enough about restorations to be much help.” Now she stood beside him again.
“You could hold my wrench.”
She gave him a playful shove. “You did not just say that.”
He let out a laugh and tugged her to the back where he lifted the window and lowered the tailgate. Crawling inside, he beckoned her in after him.
She crawled in and settled against him. “What are we doing?”
“Checking out the best feature of this car.” His lips were on her neck, warm breath stroking her skin into a landscape of goose bumps.
She tried not to gasp. “Which is?”
“A big cargo space for watching drive-in movies and necking.”
A laugh escaped her. “Necking?”
“Necking,” he repeated, his mouth continuing a thorough assault on her throat and ear. She tilted her head and closed her eyes with a low moan. His hands glided over her sides, her back, under her sweater. “Do you know how hot it is when you talk cars?” he whispered against her skin.
He proceeded to show her just how hot he thought it was, and soon they agreed to skip the movie, grab the dim sum to go, and head for the privacy and comfort of home.
As they drove in contented silence, she contemplated that being in love with a man like him wasn’t for the faint of heart. An athlete who made big paychecks, who was sought out by adoring fans, many of them beautiful women who wouldn’t be easily discouraged from going after what they wanted.
A moment of clarity struck her. In spite of the doubts that dragged her down, despite the fact that a robust self-image wasn’t part of her makeup and that she’d rather fall for someone who flew way under the radar, Dave Grimson was worth the risk. And if he asked her to take that risk and be with him, she wouldn’t say no.
For a guy who was supposed to be distancing himself, who was supposed to be bracing himself against falling deeper, he was doing a shitty job of it, and he tried not to ponder chickens coming home to roost. He stole a side glance at Ellie, who stared out the window at Christmas lights with a dreamy little smile on her face. A smile he loved. Christ, he couldn’t help himself because everything about her was easy to love. Couldn’t stay away from her. Didn’t want to stay away. He’d never felt like this before, and it scared him and made him feel invincible at the same time.
Taking her to the garage had made him edgier than a skate blade, but as soon as he had driven inside, he was glad he had. He’d thought about inviting a teammate or two when he first bought the space, but then things went to hell, and he hadn’t felt like sharing that part of his life with anyone—too close, too personal, too exposed. He’d never considered taking Nicky there—not that she’d have been interested—and he’d kept it his secret. Sonoma had a vague idea about a garage somewhere, but he hadn’t revealed it even to her. Hadn’t wanted to. Not until Ellie. Why was that? Besides the fact she could talk cars—fuck, he’d been harder than hickory from the moment she’d first asked about the Nomad’s engine—it felt oddly safe to open up with her, and he found himself wanting to do more of that. With her, he forgot he was a hockey player with an image to uphold. He was just plain old Dave, and he got the distinct impression she preferred him that way.
Yoda growled in his head about everything he was doing wrong, but he didn’t care. It was Christmas, damn it, and he deserved some happiness, no matter how fleeting. And being with Ellie made him happy. Being with her was like tearing off a dull film that grayed everything out and replacing it with a blindingly bright kaleidoscope of color.
Her hands rested in her lap, and he reached over and covered one with his. It felt so right. She turned and smiled at him.
“Do you want to drive around and look at more Christmas lights?” he offered.
She shook her head. “I’
m getting my fill right now. Besides, my mouth is watering for that dim sum.”
“Your wish is my command.”
Back in her house, they gated the dogs in the kitchen and spread a quilt in front of a cozy fire. The only light came from the flames and the white lights on the little Christmas tree, but it was enough to eat by.
Ellie handed him a Christmas plate and chopsticks. “A Chinese picnic on Christmas Eve,” she laughed.
He grinned back and held up his beer bottle. “To new traditions.”
She gave him a curious look before distributing the boxes filled with their supper. “I like it this way. It’s fun and different.”
“Special,” he agreed.
As they ate, they shared stories about their family traditions and past Christmases.
She topped off her red wine and handed him a cold brew from a little cooler. “How long has it been since you spent the holidays with your family?”
“Probably about four years since I spent it with my mom in Florida.” He studied her for a beat as she munched away, then blurted, “It’d be fun to get together with all of them again. They’d love you.”
She stopped chewing and blinked at him. Shit. That’s not anything she wants to hear. Way to scare the crap out of her. Her half-smile a moment later put him somewhat at ease—apparently, he hadn’t totally blown it—and they went back to casual talk about their childhoods. Soon she piled their empty plates and set them to one side, and he did the same with the empty food cartons.
“So you think you’ll still be okay watching Benny when I go on the road?” he said.
“Absolutely! He’s such a sweet boy. Although I’m afraid to say Casper might have found a new favorite guy.”
“Figures. Another fickle female.”
“Be careful, or I might not give you your present.”
“You got me a present?” He shouldn’t have been surprised, especially after his conversation with Sonoma, but he’d been so focused on his gift for Ellie that he’d forgotten she might reciprocate, whether he wanted her to or not.
