by L A Cotton
“One dance.” Batting my lashes at him, I swayed my hips to the sultry beat, not caring that the party was winding down.
And what a party it had been.
Everything about today was nothing short of perfect. Add in the fact that my best friends were both pregnant, and it was definitely a day to remember.
It didn’t stop the gnawing ache in my stomach though. I was happy for them, so freaking happy, but I wanted that. I wanted a baby. I wanted in that damn club.
“One dance,” Asher conceded, pulling me into his arms. “You, Mya Bennet are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on.”
“Even when I’m butt drunk?”
“Even then.” He kissed the end of my nose, twirling me to the music. Endorphins coursed through my veins, giving me a giddy high.
It felt like forever since I’d let my hair down. But there wasn’t much time for yourself when you fostered kids requiring emergency placements. Our house was a revolving door of children with trauma and adolescents with attitude. I loved it though. Making a difference to their lives, playing a tiny part in shaping the adults they would one day become. For giving them a safe place full of love and comfort when they needed it most.
But for as much as I loved it, I yearned for a child of our own. We’d talked about it a lot over the last eighteen months, and we were both on the same page. Our bodies refused to cooperate though.
A whole year of raised hopes. I didn’t even bother testing every month now, determined to let nature take its course. It was easier said than done though.
“Babe?” Asher nudged his cheek against mine. “What is it?”
“Hailee and Fee are both pregnant.”
“They are?” He pulled back to look at me, and I nodded. “Shit, I had no idea.”
“I figured it out earlier. But it’s supposed to be a secret until they’re further along and Hailee didn’t want to overshadow the wedding.”
“How did it make you feel hearing that?” His eyes glittered with concern, and I loved him all the more for it.
“I’m happy for them, of course I am. But I can’t help but wonder if it will ever be us.”
“It will,” he said with utter conviction. “I know it will. I watch you with the kids who come into our home, and do you know what I see? Someone who is going to make a great mom. We have time, Mya. We have all the time in the world. And if things don’t go the way we’d hoped, we’ll figure it out.”
“You’re right. I’m being ridiculous.” I tried to turn away from him, but Asher slid his fingers under my jaw.
“Your feelings are valid and it’s okay to be happy for them and sad for us. But a year is nothing for a lot of couples.”
“I know.” Looping my arms around his neck, I leaned close, breathing Asher in. He was my anchor. My partner in crime. My best friend.
“We can practice,” he breathed the words onto my lips. “Lots and lots of practice. How does that sound?”
I looked him in the eye and smiled. “I think I’m ready for you to take me to bed now.”
“Fuck, babe, you feel… fuuuck.” Asher rocked into me, his fingers clawing at my thighs as he rode my body into bliss.
“More,” I cried, raking my fingernails down his broad shoulders. “More…”
I loved the feel of him hard and bare inside me. And being able to let loose and not worry about someone overhearing was only a bonus.
He pulled out, rocking back on his haunches. Grabbing my calves, he wound my legs around his waist before driving back into me slowly.
“Ahhhh.” I fisted the sheets, the new angle so deep, so delicious I could barely breathe.
“I love watching your face as I fill you,” he said, thickly.
“You’re so dirty.”
“Only for you.” His deep chuckle melted me, and I lifted my gaze, locking eyes with him as he sank into me over and over. His thumb slipped between us, finding my clit.
“God, Ash, it’s… God…”
All coherent thought evaporated as pleasure splashed inside me, and my legs began trembling.
“Give it to me,” he rasped. “Give me everything.”
I came apart, crying his name, silently praying that this was the time. That our bodies would do what they were damn supposed to and make a baby.
“Fuck, Mya… fuck.” Asher collapsed on top of me, a sweaty and sated mess. He kissed me long and hard, lazily tangling his tongue with mine, drawing out every last drop of pleasure.
His hand traced its way down to my stomach, resting there. “I feel like I gave my swimmers a fighting chance this time.” Asher gave me a crooked grin.
“I hope so.” Because having a baby with you is all I want. I swallowed the words.
“It’ll happen, babe. If it’s not this month, or the next, or the one after, it’ll happen. And that baby—our baby—will be so freaking loved.”
“I love you.” I curved my hands over his shoulders and yanked him down to kiss him.
“Not as much as I love you, Mya.”
Being pregnant was all I could think about.
But this man right here, he was enough.
And Asher was right.
Whatever the future brought, we’d figure it out together.
Always.
Asher
I watched Mya sleep. Watched her eyes flutter softly as she dreamed—dreams of me and the life we would have together, hopefully—and the gentle rise and fall of her chest.
I’d never loved another woman the way I loved her. Never would. She was my whole fucking world.
But I knew she was hurting, our prayers of getting pregnant still unanswered. It had only been a year, but every month that ticked by was another knock to her faith that everything would work out.
“I can feel you watching me,” she murmured, brushing her nose along my arm.
“I like watching you sleep.”
“What time is it?” One eye cracked open, that beautiful brown that melted me. She smiled at me.
“A little after nine. How’s your head?”
“It feels like there’s a brass band in there.”
“That’s what you get for unleashing your inner party girl.” I smirked, brushing the wild curls away from her eyes.
“Uh. I didn’t do anything embarrassing, did I?”
“You mean aside from dragging me to our room and doing that little striptease for me?”
“Ash.” She swatted my chest, but I snagged her wrist, pulling her hand to my lips and kissing her knuckles.
“Do you have any idea how much I love you?”
“Hmm-mm.” Mya snuggled closer as I traced my thumb over her wedding band.
It felt like a lifetime ago we’d gotten married in a small ceremony in my parents’ backyard. They’d wanted us to have a big, lavish wedding, but it wasn’t us. All we’d cared about was declaring our love and commitment in front of our closest friends and family.
“I’m going to get up and make myself a coffee. You want anything?” I asked her.
“No, I’m good, thank you.”
“Okay. Sleep.” I dropped a kiss on her head, untangling myself from her side. “I’ll wake you up when we need to get ready to leave.”
“Okay,” she said around a sleepy yawn.
Throwing back the sheet, I climbed out of bed, but Mya grabbed me, pulling me back down to her. “Love you.” She kissed me, then rolled over and went back to sleep.
“Didn’t expect to find you down here,” I said to Jase and Cam as I joined them at their table.
“Hailee was up half the night with morning sickness.”
“Shit, man, that’s rough.”
“What’s your excuse?” I flicked my eyes to Jase, and he glowered at me.
“There was a couple above us going at it all damn night. I barely slept.”
Cam and I exploded with laughter. “Shouldn’t that have been you and your new wife?”
“Fuck off,” Jase grumbled, nursing a strong mug of coffee.
“Having kids will do that to a guy,” I said.
“Tell me about it.” He ran a hand down his face. “How’s Mya feeling… about everything.”
“She’s excited for you all, of course she is. But it’s hard, you know? All she wants is to get pregnant.”
“There’s still time.”
“I know and I truly believe it’ll happen when the time’s right.” Because honestly, I didn’t know what would happen if we couldn’t conceive naturally.
If I couldn’t give her the one thing she wanted most in the world.
“Well, until then, we’ll have enough fucking kids between us for the two of you to pitch in with the babysitting.” Jason managed a small grin.
“Sometimes, I can’t believe this is our life. That we’re this fucking lucky,” I said.
“Yeah, I know exactly what you mean.” Cam let out a steady breath. “It hasn’t always been easy, but I wouldn’t change it for the world.”
“You’re married, Jase. Married, with a kid on the way.”
An awed expression washed over him as he stared at me. “Fuck, you’re right. I’m screwed. Totally and utterly screwed.
Months later…
“Babe, I’m home,” Mya’s voice filtered down our hall. A second later, she appeared around the door. “What are you doing?”
“Just got done video calling with Jase.”
“You saw Lily?”
“I did.” I grinned. “She’s getting so big. How was your day?”
“Actually, I need to talk to you.”
“You do. What about?”
She pulled something out of her bag and came to sit on the couch with me, snuggling into my side. “It’s probably easier to show you.”
“What is this?” I asked as she pressed the envelope into my hand.
“Open it and see.”
My brows furrowed. She was acting strange. But I wasn’t opposed to a surprise or two. Perhaps it was tickets to a romantic night away, just the two of us in a hotel room.
Yeah, I could totally go for that.
But when I pulled out the grainy black and white image, I had the distinct feeling I was off the mark. “Mya, wh -what is this?”
“You know what it is.” Her voice cracked, and my eyes lifted to look at her.
“We’re….”
She nodded. “I went to the clinic today and they confirmed it. I’m about seven weeks along.”
“But… how?”
“Well, you put the P in the V and sometimes it makes—
“We’re having a baby?”
Her tentative smile turned into a huge grin. “We are.”
“Fuck, okay. This is… wow.”
After Jase and Fee’s wedding we’d spent an intense six months trying to conceive. But it just hadn’t happened, and by the time Jase’s daughter, Lily, and Cam’s daughter, Ashleigh, arrived, we’d decided to stop actively trying. It was consuming us, making us both stressed.
I guess the more relaxed approach worked.
“There’s something else,” Mya started, and my stomach twisted.
“Is everything okay? What did the doctor say? Is there—”
“Take a breath,” she chuckled. “Everything is fine. But there’s a tiny complication.”
“Complication? Okay,” I inhaled a deep breath. “Well, whatever it is, we’ll handle it together.”
“We kind of have no choice because it’s… twins.”
“Twins?” I gawked at her. “You mean there’s more than one in there?” My eyes dropped to her flat stomach.
“Yeah,” she said. “Two heartbeats, two babies.”
“Okay.”
“Asher?” Mya pressed her hand against my cheek. “Are you okay? You’ve gone as white as a sheet.”
“I’m fine. Totally fine.”
“Do you need a glass of water or something?”
I needed something all right.
I needed a minute to get my head around this.
Twins?
Fuck.
I hope you enjoyed the Rixon Raiders.
… if you’re intrigued about how Cameron, Jason, and Asher deal with parenthood, you can find out in Rixon High, the next generation series.
Blurred Lines
Avery and Miley’s Story
Available free
Off-Limits
Lily and Kaiden’s story
Available now
Tragic Lies
Xander and Peyton’s story
Available now
Ruined Hopes
Ashleigh’s story
Coming soon
About the Author
ANGSTY. EDGY. ADDICTIVE ROMANCE
Author of mature young adult and new adult novels, L A is happiest writing the kind of books she loves to read: addictive stories full of teenage angst, tension, twists and turns.
Home is a small town in the middle of England where she currently juggles being a full-time writer with being a mother/referee to two little people. In her spare time (and when she’s not camped out in front of the laptop) you’ll most likely find L A immersed in a book, escaping the chaos that is life.
L A loves connecting with readers.
The best places to find her are:
www.lacotton.com
