NEVER BEEN A LOVED ONE

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NEVER BEEN A LOVED ONE Page 8

by Ramamurthy, Sivaranjini


  “It was a beautiful place. How should I know it would be there? Moreover, we are in a jungle we should be prepared for anything!”

  “Yes,” she nodded still thinking. “Today we are leaving this place by any means,” she added, packing her stuff.

  Why is she not asking about what I was about to say? I believe she would have guessed it. Maybe she would need some time. Okay, I am not going to bring up the topic until she brings it up. He breathed a sigh of relief. Seeing her about to turn, he looked away. He then saw her pulling the dry innerwear, hidden between the giant roots. Soon they left the place in search of their way out.

  THE SURPRISE

  “No, I can’t move another step!” Sara caught her painful knees, bending down.

  “Hey run! Run fast! There is some animal behind you!” CK yelled, running in front of her, which made her to run unconsciously. Only when he turned back and laughed at her she realized nothing was following her. She started to beat him. He was trying to defend himself. She suddenly froze as if she was a statue. Seeing her reaction, he turned back fearing it would be some animal, but he didn’t notice anything weird. So, he was pulling her hand asking, “What is it?” She didn’t say a word. She just grabbed his hand and started to walk beside him in between the bushes. He kept repeatedly questioning her, “Where are we going?” She acted as if she didn’t hear his voice.

  After a few minutes of walk through the bushes, “Shush!” Sara signaled, with a finger on her lips. CK stopped his questions midway wondering what it would be. Sara held his chin and turned it to face something. He saw a beautiful small hut before her, mostly covered by the branches of the trees.

  “Oh my god!” He was astonished, with his hands rushing to his wide opened mouth.

  “Surprise!” She beamed, jumping. He was wondering who would have built such a beautiful hut in between the bushes of forest.

  “I built it for you,” Sara smiled, with her fingers pointing towards the hut.

  “No, it would be the man-eater!” CK joked.

  “No, you are scaring me again!” She tried to hide her fear, which was visible through her pretty eyes.

  “Okay, then you go first,” he said, controlling his smile.

  “What am I scared? I will!” She tried acting bold. She walked carefully and he just followed behind her. He was trying to scare her by suddenly making sounds near her ears. She just ignored him being conscious not to be fooled again.

  Two logs were kept as steps to reach the door. Exhaling air, closing her eyes, she kept her one step on the log, one on the mud. She turned and saw him. He knew from her eyes that she wanted to be stopped but he was also sure that she wouldn’t open the door. So, he was teasing her saying, “I will wait here so that I can run, and you be their dinner today!” But to his surprise, she opened the door slowly. She shouted man eaters and started to run! Seeing her, he ran so far. Only then he noticed she was not running behind. She stood near the steps and was laughing covering her mouth. CK acted as if he was not afraid.

  “I was trying to make your prank work at least once,” he said, continuing his act. She laughed like anything. For this happiness of you I can be pranked throughout my life , thought CK, admiring her.

  “Okay, enough of acting get inside!” She was tired of laughing. There was a cot made of jute thread. It did not look like double-bed cot or single-bed cot. It was in between and there were cookery mud vessels. The whole hut would be sufficient only for two. There was some kerosene lamp enough to light up the place and there were some groceries too. Only after seeing the groceries they felt the real happiness. Nothing gives you happiness as much as you see food materials after a day’s hunger , he thought.

  “Whose could it be?” Sara asked.

  “The place looks like it was unused for 2–3 weeks,” CK replied.

  “It may belong to some explorer!” She said looking at the groceries available. She took some and made fire using her technique. But every time she did it, she expected CK to praise her. So, he clapped his hand even before she saw him. She cooked a dish that he had never tasted. He thought, Who cares about the tastes of food after days of hunger. When she asked how it is, “It was okay, I adjusted,” he shrugged.

  “You need not adjust from tomorrow. You cook,” she said, always having a counter ready. CK silently put his head down and had his dinner with no further words. After dinner, they sat near the fire in the moonlight, warming themselves physically. They were warming mentally by saying different magical incidents that could happen to take them back to home. CK wanted the Discovery team to come here and meet them by coincidence. Sara wanted the magical shoes that can take them to their desired place.

  “Don’t worry, before we don’t know where to stay and now we at least have a place to stay and groceries for few months. Within that some magic can happen.” Sara said.

  “Yesterday happens for a reason

  You will come to know in a season.” She quoted.

  “Oh no, you became a poet being in the forest.” CK joked. After getting tired of consoling each other, they went inside. Each one was seeing each other after seeing the cot.

  “Okay, you sleep on the cot,” Sara stated.

  “No, you can’t bear the cold so you sleep on the cot,” he replied. After arguing for five minutes, they concluded that Sara was going to sleep on the cot and CK on the floor. After half an hour, he woke up by feeling a droplet of water on his forehead. He wiped it and saw Sara through kerosene light. They didn’t put the light off so that animals won’t attack and the Discovery team may find them as it was one among the plans they discussed. She was trying to sleep in the kind of cot in which she had never slept. She was tossing this side and that side, wearing that chudi she looked stunning in. Soon there was heavy rain so CK stood up being half wet. He sat on the corner of the cot. There was some droplets dripping on her head too but she didn’t care.

  He heard Sara’s sleepy voice, “Is it dripping there?”

  “It’s not dripping, it is pouring!” He replied frustrated without sleep. Sara moved and slept on oneside, facing the wall and said, “Sleep here.” CK was wondering whether he could sleep controlling his emotion. Finally trusting him, he removed his shirt, which was wet and put it on the corner of cot. He slept on his back facing the ceiling, being conscious he didn’t touch her. More droplets of water started to drip on her hand, which was outside the cot. So, she turned the other side facing him, her fingers were touching him. CK couldn’t sleep. He opened his eyes and saw the beautiful face very close to him and uncontrollably he turned towards her.

  THE LOVELY DAYS

  He saw a pearl-like droplet on her finger, which was touching his shoulders. The kerosene lighting and the cold made him kiss the droplet. She didn’t react. CK tried to control himself but he couldn’t resist his hormones. He kissed her forehead, brushing her hair. She opened her eyes and saw his bare body. Obviously she also has emotions and it was further induced by the rain but to the maximum she controlled and turned that side. He understood that she was ready to accept him by the way her pretty eyes looked at him. He kept his foot on hers holding her hands and he felt the heat from his palm transferring to hers. Sara didn’t pull herself away from him, so he kissed her neck. He could feel her breathing heavily. He moved his hand to her back zip and removed it slowly, holding her hand, giving his warmth. They explored each other and made love that night.

  As the sun rose, CK woke up with the waves of sun heating his already heated body. He felt a little heavy on his shoulder . It was her. She was sleeping curled up towards him. He turned his body towards her, protecting her from sun rays. He kissed her forehead gently without waking her up. My shirt and your pant looks complete , thought CK looking at Sara curled up. But he was unsure about her reaction when she woke up. He wanted to prove that the last night pleasure was not because of rain but because of his love. So he thought, I will prepare a good breakfast. It will help her mind stabilize and then I will start to speak out my heart .
He lifted her head carefully and landed in the cot. He made fruit salad with the available fruits. When he opened the mud pot to have some water, he saw the pot empty. He saw Sara was still sleeping, so he went outside in search of water. He went in the direction of birds remembering the Hollywood scenes. To his luck he heard the waterfall sound and felt the chill breeze after a walk of few minutes. The chill breeze gave him all the energy to run to see it. After walking on the white rocks, he saw a pleasant waterfall surrounded by a pool of water not so deep. The place was covered by different kinds of trees, algae and plants. It looked so green and to add colors to it, many butterflies and small birds were flying around singing their songs. He wanted Sara to see it. So he ran to the hut and woke her by shaking the cot.

  “Come on, wake up! Wake up!” CK yelled but she didn’t open her eyes. So, he lifted her up and walked to the waterfall. By the cold breeze and the bird sounds, she opened her eyes and saw the incredible waterfall. He smiled and landed her. She was admiring the scenery and he was admiring her.

  “It’s beautiful,” Sara shouted in excitement.

  “But not as beautiful as you,” he whispered, looking deep into her eyes, to confess his love. She turned slowly towards him and looked at his eyes. His eyes made her remember the last night, so she bent down her face turning away. He badly wanted the power to read her mind at this moment. He was wondering about her thoughts.

  Is she regretting?

  Is she feeling ill of me?

  CK held her hands and confessed his love to drive her out of fear.

  “That night was not because of rain

  It’s because of my love towards you

  I was attracted towards you from the very first moment I saw you

  I didn’t know when it turned into love

  I too realized its depth only last night

  It’s not only you who lost your virginity.”

  Only the last line made her look at him, relieving her shock.

  “Yeah, I have never been a loved one,” he added, which made Sara hug him tight. He could feel the tears shedding on his bare body. It was her first voluntary hug. He didn’t want to end up in tears so he patted her back trying to make her cool when she rested her chin on his shoulder. He bent her down sideways supporting her back with his hands. She twitched, and he looked at her eyes saying, “I will never let you cry.” He kissed her forehead and made her lay on the white rocks beside him. They were silent. They heard the birds singing, making their scene even more romantic. “I never thought I will confess my love in the forest,” he spoke, looking at the butterflies that were trying to add some more color to their colorful moment.

  “No, I knew I will lose my virginity in the middle of the jungle,” she mischievously stated, getting back to her form. They both started to laugh, joining the sound of birds.

  Their hearts are filled but their tummies made noises, indicating their presence. Sara volunteered that she will cook and bring the breakfast here. CK wanted to surprise her with the delicious breakfast, which was made already so he kept mum. He kept smiling, seeing her walk back to the hut. He waited for her so long, imaging how to react when she returned but she didn’t return. He thought she was cooking a new one without seeing the breakfast already made by him. So, he ran to the hut, but there was no sign of her in the hut. He panicked and started to shout, “Sara! Sara!” The birds from the tree flew hearing his voice. He thought it was his bad luck that something happened to her since he started to love her. He held his head without knowing what to do. He calmed himself saying, “Don’t worry, mom will be with her.” He ran outside to check her footsteps. He searched her small footprints, unusual for her height, which he noticed last night.

  After walking for a few minutes, he saw her footprints taking a different direction. Seeing it, CK exhaled in peace, noticing only her footprint not any other animals or man near hers. He understood that she had lost her way. It’s a one-way path so she wouldn’t have covered much distance. He ran shouting her name each time he blinked his eyes. After some time his voice became so weak that he badly needed a breath. So, he stopped, bending down inhaling and exhaling heavily. He brushed his hand on his face, wiping the sweat. He saw a blurred vision of his shirt coming towards him. CK closed his eyes tightly shaking his head to ensure what he saw was true. He saw Sara with a terrible fear in her face looking back and forth, walking towards him. Seeing CK, she ran towards him and hugged him and kissed him all over his face. After calming down, she said, “I came here to get some fruit. I wasn’t lost,” trying to act as if she was not scared. He smiled at her controlling his laugh, which was enough for her to understand that he understood. Then Sara held his hand and walked back home saying she doesn’t remember the way.

  Even in her college and office she doesn’t remember the way.

  “What can I do? Everything looks similar,” said Sara leaning on his shoulder. He told her certain landmarks so that next time she won’t be lost. When Sara went home, she lay on the cot exhausted. He wanted her to be surprised. So, he kept repeatedly asking for breakfast trying to pull her out of the cot. Finally, she got up and saw the bowl. CK closed her wide opened mouth by stuffing the breakfast. He ended his confession by having delicious breakfast, no brunch.

  They made fire to bear the cool breeze of the night. Sara was sitting in between the legs of CK. Her back was supported by CK’s body, with his arms hugging her and giving them some more heat. Then CK held her hand, kissing her neck. He saw something green in her shoulder through the light of fire. He bit it leaving a love bite.

  “Hey, what?” Sara shouted, holding his hands tight.

  “I saw something green in your body,” he whispered near her ears.

  “It’s my mole,” Sara said, leaning back on his shoulder. “In green?” he asked, looking at it.

  “Yeah, it’s a lucky mole, so I’ll be lucky in everything and I will become rich. My mom has told me,” she said, lacing his hand. CK was wondering whether to tell her that he is a big shot’s son. How would she react when he confesses it? There was a moment of silence. They could hear the forest’s sound.

  “What happened baby, don’t you like it?” Sara asked, hitting his chin with her head. Only then CK became conscious. He recalled the words. It was the first time he heard the word ‘baby’ from the softest voice in the world. He didn’t want to ruin the moment.

  “Of course I like your every mole,” he whispered.

  “Okay, then tell me where the rest are,” she challenged him. He scanned her visible parts. To his bad luck, she was wearing the attractive blue chudi with lace at the end of the top and yellow pant. She never exposes much, even though he found her more attractive by her prefect body hidden within the clothes. He was wondering what would happen if she exposes much and he laughed.

  Seeing him laughing, “You don’t remember, right?” She asked, biting her lower lips. CK was triggered by the way she did it. He grabbed her in his arms and said, “But I can find it out.” Sara tried to escape with as minimum effort as possible. He closed the wooden door with one hand and the other hand holding her to escape from the eyes of birds and animals. In the hunt of the mole, they made love.

  They didn’t know when they slept and when CK opened his eyes it was bright all around. He felt glad to wake up next to his loved one sleeping on his arm, trying to hold him in her arms. He waved his hands slowly through her hair and took her head gently from his arm and landed on the cot. But she woke up. She saw him getting up from the cot. She pulled him back to the cot with her lengthy hand. She lay with her head on his lap.

  “Are we living together?” Sara asked, still closing her eyes.

  “Yes, that too in our world,” CK slowly patted her hand.

  “You won’t believe it, but I always dreamt of it.” Sara suddenly rose up from his lap with bright eyes. CK was looking at her eyes to make it brief. “I never believed in arranged marriage. How can we meet someone in one day and spend the rest of our life with that person? Nowadays l
ove is just an attraction to get sex. It fades away. A love, which lasts even after having sex for the 500th time without any social pressure, i.e. marriage, is pure love according to me. I wanted my love to be that way.” She leaned on his shoulder, with her eyes deeply thinking.

  “Oh, 500! We have made only two. We have a long way to go!” CK smiled, acting to push her back to the cot.

  “Will you have the same love on our 500th night?” Sara looked deep into his eyes.

  “No, obviously not possible. Last night it faded away after finding every mole of yours. Now I need a new body with new moles. Same love for the 500th time, it only happens in films,” he said smiling, trying to joke. Sara was still looking at him. He couldn’t resist his laughter. So, he stood up from the cot and faced the wall showing his back to her. He was controlling his laugh. There was a moment of silence.

  “I will never force you,” she spoke in a trembling voice. He turned biting his teeth and saw her eyes turning red. Seeing it, he went fast and hugged her, keeping her face on his chest. She breathed heavily at the rate of his heart. She never cries or gives up so soon. She is so strong by heart.

  “I will love you even more not only on our 500th time but even on our 1000th time,” he assured her, hugging her tight.

  “Don’t ever joke about it again,” she started beating him with her soft hands on his fit body.

  “You don’t trust me?” He asked her, getting close to her face, looking deep into her eyes. Sara saw his pink nose just an inch away.

  “I always do baby but-” She rubbed his nose with hers. He rubbed her nose back, cherishing the moment, asking, “Why but?” They both smiled. She held his neck and said,

  “I am afraid of my fate

  My father loved me,

  But he passed away when I was young.

  So, my mom was depressed and she was not in a stage to love herself then how could she

  love me?

  So, I always have a fear that I will be a ‘never been a loved one’.”

 

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