by Sarah Noffke
“You’re lying,” Allouette sang, her voice light. “Zat girl vas too young to be your mummy.”
I was grateful that Dahlia’s back had been to Allouette or she would have recognized her right away. “It was just a girl,” I said in a tired voice.
Allouette slid in front of me, partially blocking my view of the sea. “Did you love her?”
“Of course not,” I said, letting my eyes close for a half beat.
“But you vere together, veren’t you?” Her eyes tapered into thin lines and I dropped my head with shame. It was ridiculous and yet, Allouette had this effect on me. She could shame me.
“Yes,” I finally said, my head low.
She grabbed my chin, her pointy nails piercing my skin. “I’m your girl now, isn’t zat right?”
I nodded, my face still in her grasp. Throwing my chin to the side, Allouette cackled loudly. “No more illusions of other girlz.”
I turned away from her, wondering where I’d gone. Where was Ren? Who was this guy? How had I lost myself?
“Now, it’s party time,” Allouette said. She walked over to her suitcase on the bed and withdrew a case of knives. They were sheathed in a leather satchel. She rolled them out and her eyes dazzled as they ran over the polished hilts. “Zis is going to be zo much fun,” she said, running her fingertips over various knives. Having catalogued her options, she withdrew a serrated blade with a rosewood handle. Yanking up her knee-high skirt, she slipped the knife into a holster strapped around her mid-thigh. I thought that would be it, but then she grabbed two more knives and fitted them into sheaths in her knee-high boots.
“You don’t need that many knives. It’s only one girl,” I said, and instantly flinched when she whipped around, giving me a punishing stare.
“I know vhat I’m doing,” she said, a vicious arrogance in her voice. “Send her to zee boat, Ren. Ve’re ready to end zis.”
***
Allouette and I waited in the hold of a ship. It was scheduled to sail out to sea, dispose of its “cargo,” and then return us to Stockholm. As instructed, I’d lured the girl to the ship. She actually thought she’d chartered it for a journey that would save her life. She was, as Allouette warned, fairly difficult to control. That’s why I had to be on the ship to ensure she didn’t change her mind and make the ship return prematurely.
“It’s time,” Allouette said, gripping my arm and pulling me toward the main cabin where the girl was stationed for the trip.
“I don’t need to go,” I said, realizing I’d never seen someone killed before.
“Don’t be such a coward,” Allouette said, probably having read the fear in my eyes. “If zomething goes vrong I vant you zere to help. Ve shouldn’t underestimate zis one.”
Dutifully I followed Allouette. When we arrived at the cabin door she pressed her ear to it, a curious look on her face. “Oh, merde,” Allouette said in a harsh whisper.
“What?” I said.
She didn’t answer but instead busted through the door. My eyes widened. Not because the woman wasn’t alone, but rather because she was in child labor. The first mate swiveled in our direction. His brow was dripping with sweat and in his hands he held a bloody baby covered in a towel. The girl was propped in a chair, her legs up, a blanket partially obscuring her bottom half.
“You vent into labor early?” Allouette said, shaking a disappointed finger at the woman. “Bad girl.”
The woman was pregnant! The one I had been brainwashing for six months. I’d lured a pregnant woman to her death. And Allouette was prepared to kill a woman and her baby. I stared disbelieving at the sight in front of me. Too much was going on. Too fast.
Panting rapidly, the woman yelped. The baby in the towel wailed in the first mate’s frozen arms. The man’s attention was only half on us as he tried over and over again to swaddle the crying bundle. “Good, I could use the help,” he said.
The woman yelled, “No! Keep her away from me!” And then she screamed out like she’d already been stabbed. She’d recognized Allouette and knew why she was here. And she continued to pant wildly.
“Oh, I von’t come near you,” Allouette said. “I’ll kill you from here and then your bebe.”
The first mate’s eyes rose up in disbelief and horror. Allouette withdrew the knife from her thigh. “I’m going to enjoy killing you and your child, Eloise.”
Again the first mate’s face swiveled around, like he was trying to figure out how to get out of this or was looking for a weapon. He held the now quiet baby against him in a protective stance. “What are you doing?!” he said, shock written on his face.
“Freeze the boy, Ren,” Allouette ordered me and I did it immediately. He stood like a statue with the bundle pressed to him.
The woman was still panting, a great deal of blood spilling onto the floor under her and soaking the linens around her.
“You had everyzing I vould have ever vanted, Eloise, and you threw it away. I’m not killing you just because Chase ordered me to, but because you are zuch a fool. You could have had him. You could have been Mrs. Chase Bane, but you made the vrong decision. I vould have done anyzing to be in your position and now look at you. You and your child are going to die for your foolishness,” Allouette said and the knife in her hand rose into the air, hovering there.
I didn’t wake from the haze I’d been in. Not then. But I did suddenly realize I’d been seduced into exacting revenge for the man Allouette truly loved. And that man wasn’t me. I’d been played.
“Please,” the woman said between breaths. “There’s another baby. I’m having another baby.” And again she wheezed in several short breaths.
And then I realized why the woman was still panting even after her baby lay in the first mate’s arms. She was having twins.
“Vhat?” Allouette said in sudden alarm. “No!”
“Yes, a girl,” Eloise said, shaking her head.
“Vell, she vill die too. I can’t leave any pure bloods alive on this boat. Especially a girl,” Allouette said and then a shrieking laugh erupted from her mouth.
Eloise’s eyes connected with mine. “Please, sir. Help me. Please,” she said through ragged breaths, and then she groaned loudly.
I was frozen, unsure what to do. Whom to assist.
“No one vill help you,” Allouette said and the knife flew through the air faster than I realized was possible. It was a bullet, with force behind it that spoke of Allouette’s vengeful anger. And before my eyes the serrated blade sliced across the laboring woman’s throat, spilling blood all down her front. She hadn’t even taken her last gurgling breath when Allouette spun to face the boy holding a wiggling infant.
“How about you die first and zen your sister,” Allouette said to the bundle.
I knew she was crazy from the beginning, but not until that moment did I realize she was a deranged psychopath. People thought I was heartless, but I had nothing on this woman. She, to this day, remains the darkest human being I’ve ever met.
Allouette slipped one of the blades out of her boot and spun around to face me. “Next time you von’t doubt my preparedness, vill you?” she said to me.
And she didn’t wait for my answer before she stalked over to the baby in the frozen boy’s arms.
“Allouette?” I said.
She whipped around, an impatient look in her eyes. “Vhat?”
“There won’t be a next time,” I said, and because she never suspected that I’d turn against her, I was able to dive into her mind at once and take control. She had deluded herself to believe I was her puppet and that I’d never cut the strings. Under my control she stood as frozen as the first mate. I released him at once.
He shook his head slightly as he came out of the daze. His head swiveled to the baby in his arms. I stalked forward and pulled the child away into my own arms. The first mate was scanning the scene around him with terrified eyes. He shuffled back with urgency when he saw Eloise lying with her throat slit on the other side of the cabin.
> I snapped my fingers at him. “Don’t think about it right now. There’s another child in that woman. You have to get her out right now,” I ordered, a strange sternness in my voice. “The child is half out, but you’re going to have to pull her the rest of the way since her mother can’t push.”
The boy just stared in a daze.
“Now!” I yelled, making the thing in my arms squirm. I’d never held a child and the experience was as unenjoyable as I always imagined.
The first mate rushed forward and I turned my attention to a frozen Allouette. I regarded her dull doll-like eyes for only a second before turning her around and marching her out of the cabin. With the baby still in my arms I walked behind Allouette, who moved like a robot, each movement stiff and of my doing. I had a firm lock on her mind and although she tried to resist, I was properly motivated to fight her. I marched her to the bow of the ship. Then I made her climb over the railing. I paused her as she sat on the edge and I made her head turn to look at me.
“You, Allouette, are the worst human being,” I said, the disgust in my voice that had been begging to be let out bursting forth. “I consider it a great honor to rid the world of you.” And then I made her spring forth into the Baltic Sea and sink to the bottom.
That single day holds more regrets than any other. And the biggest one was that I failed to kill the devil. Maybe it was because Allouette still owned a piece of me. Maybe it was because my attention was distracted by the squirming mess in my arms. Or maybe it’s because I wasn’t as dark as I thought. I wasn’t a murderer. I released my mind control on Allouette prematurely, allowing God to decide what to do with the devil. And he decided not to kill his greatest adversary.
Chapter Twenty
It was simply unfathomable that I knew so much about this girl I had brainwashed under Allouette’s instructions, but that I never knew she was pregnant. For some reason I didn’t sense it when I was in her mind. It was hard for me to realize that I was so thoroughly responsible for a woman’s death, a mother-to-be. What would my own mum think if she knew I was to blame for taking away two children’s mother? She always said there was nothing I could do that she wouldn’t forgive, but what I’d done was unforgivable. I’d gone along with Allouette’s plan, knowing the result. Knowing a girl would be murdered. But everything in theory sounds much easier than it is in reality. To think about someone being killed and then watching it happen are starkly different. I will never forget watching Eloise be murdered during childbirth. It is the grossest thing I’ve ever witnessed.
With the images from that afternoon still playing in my head, I carried the two newborns through the streets of Stockholm. Being inside Eloise’s head for six months, I knew much about her. I knew her favorite ice cream was chocolate, that she loved poetry, and in the evening her husband would rub her swollen feet. I also knew her address.
The paranoia set in immediately. I knew Chase was going to come after me, I just didn’t know when. I whipped my head around constantly as I neared Trey Underwood’s residence. His children fussed in my arms and I had no idea if I was holding them properly or suffocating them.
I paused on the cobbled road outside his door and mustered a courage I never before needed. I’m not a man who has ever made any apologies. Actually, I’ve only ever made one, and it was on that day.
I had shuffled the babies around trying to free up a hand to knock with, but I couldn’t manage it. My elbow clumsily bumped against the door trying to make a knocking sound. A half a minute passed before a man pulled the door back. He had straight blond hair and a look of fear in his blue eyes. Of course, Trey knew his wife was missing. She’d abandoned him early this morning, as I had made her do under Allouette’s instructions.
Trey’s eyes scanned my face and then the wiggling towels in my arms. His eyes widened with a look of shock so horrifying my knees actually softened a great deal.
“I’m sorry,” I said, shaking my head. “I failed to save her, but I did save your children.”
“What are you saying?” he said through clenched teeth, his eyes sharpening with fury.
“Eloise is dead,” I said, my voice catching. “And it’s my fault.”
“It was you?” Trey said. I could tell then that he was a brilliant man and pieced together things very quickly. “You made her leave the house this morning, didn’t you?” He ripped the tiny, bloodstained babies out of my arms.
“Yes, I’ve had mind control on her for several months. I lured her away, but Allouette killed her. I didn’t know she was pregnant. I didn’t know so much,” I said, running my hand through my hair. “Chase and Allouette convinced me to do it. I didn’t know she was pregnant. I didn’t know what I was doing…and I can’t take back what I’ve done. I know I can’t excuse my behavior,” I said in a hoarse voice, my words rushed. They were all filled with panic. “If somehow I could prove to you that I never meant for this to happen then I would. I wish––”
And then I paused. Something suddenly appeared beside Trey. My eyes skirted to it at once. It was a girl who had just popped up. Not a projection, but a real girl. And yet I could see through her, like she was a ghost. And I knew at once she wasn’t actually a ghost. She was a Dream Traveler, in the other dimension. She was dream traveling, but somehow I could see her. I wasn’t supposed to be able to. The laws of the universe prevented it and yet I know for a fact that that day I saw a small blonde teenager staring back at me during my confession. Startled and shaking, I took a sudden step back. And then I realized that she couldn’t harm me. Driven by curiosity I stretched out my hand to the girl, wanting to know if I could feel her or sense anything about her. A look of shock blanketed her face then too. She realized I could see her and looked as perplexed by the happening as I was.
“Get out of my sight,” Trey barked, revulsion in his voice.
I snapped my attention on Trey, feeling completely disoriented. My eyes flicked back in the girl’s direction as I nodded slowly. “Yes, of course,” I said, looking from Trey to the girl, my brow knitted with confusion. I stepped back, at a loss and also wanting to ask the girl a question, wanting to say more to Trey, but before I could he slammed the door in my face.
I wouldn’t meet that girl in person for sixteen more years, but I would know her for all of her life.
Chapter Twenty-One
August 1997
For three weeks I lived in a constant vigilant state. I didn’t dare stay in any place for long. I hardly slept or dream traveled. Chase would come after me. I knew that. I had betrayed him. He’d warned me what he did to people who went against him. Torture and kill them.
Eloise had died, but I’d taken her babies and brought them to safety. I saw then that Chase’s master plan had been to ensure the deaths of Eloise and Trey’s offspring. He would have total revenge. And just as Eloise had done I’d betrayed Chase, knowing exactly what he was capable of. I had deluded myself into believing she somehow deserved to die because she’d been so foolish to go against such a powerful man. Then I went and did the same exact thing. And now my punishment for that was Eloise’s death etched into my mind.
I couldn’t use any of my bank accounts during those three weeks, too fearful that it would flag Chase’s attention. I knew he had ways of finding people. He had found Eloise in Stockholm, a place she thought she would be safe from him. Every night I was in a different city, every few days a different country. I had gone back to scamming after my six-month hiatus. I needed cash to get around.
I was running a scam in a coffee shop in Prague when I was finally caught. To my astonishment it wasn’t Chase who found me first. I bolted to a standing position, leaving the old woman who was about to invest in my venture capital idea in a state of confusion. There standing in the entryway to the cafe was Trey Underwood, the Associate Head official for the Lucidites. He was regarding me with a flat, unreadable expression. I knew he was there to kill me. Whereas Chase had zero reason to murder me, as I knew he wanted to do, Trey had every reason.
&
nbsp; I was the reason his wife was dead. I ripped my mind control out of the elderly woman’s head and instantly shot the claw of control at Trey. And it was then that I realized I was as screwed as if I was facing Chase. Trey’s mind was also guarded from my penetration. I could have tried hypnosis but my adrenaline was making it impossible to concentrate. Since Allouette, I’d lost a piece of my cool confidence. It was like losing a kidney. I was still functioning with my partial confidence but not at optimal levels.
My eyes darted to the back entrance of the cafe. I immediately thought I should make a run for it. And just then something crushed a part of my remaining spirit. I was now resorting to lowly criminal behavior. I was no better than a Middling if I was considering running to get out of trouble. I’d gotten in over my head.
Trey stood assessing me, his hand fidgeting at his side. I wasn’t certain what his gifts were or what he’d do to me, but if someone had killed the love of my life I’d smash their head in. Slowly.
I took two steps toward the exit. Trey just watched, not having moved since he entered the cafe. His eyes were studying me, measuring me with a strange calculating look. Making an impromptu decision I kicked the table in front of me in Trey’s direction. It knocked into the old woman. A group rushed the scene to help her. I then darted for the exit. People jumped back as I barreled toward the alley. Behind me patrons erupted with complaints and I knew the path Trey would need to take was being partially obstructed.
