by Anna Kendra
Chapter 24
“Mother? Why are we here?” the four-year old dark-haired, blue-eyed boy asked his mother as she led him to a dingy warehouse in the redlight district of the town.
“I have to work! Now shut up, brat!” the brunette woman, who had the same eyes as her son, snapped at him.
The child stayed quiet. He never liked coming to work with his mother. These people made her wear weird clothes and walk on a stage. Then some big, mean-looking man would go up on the stage and touch her, taking her clothes off and doing things to her. Sometimes they even made him watch.But what he felt most disturbed with was the fact that these people now looked at him uncomfortably.
At four years old, he didn’t know exactly what those people were doing to her, but even at that age, it disgusted him.
That day too, he watched them do the same to his mother and then as the man kept pushing himself into her, he watched his mother throw her head back and scream. But that hadn’t been then end of it. It had only been the beginning of a nightmare that, at that time, he had no idea would last for an entire year. After the men were done with their mother, they turned their filthy eyes on him.
That day, he’d screamed too, but it hadn’t been the same scream as his mother’s. He screamed from pain and humiliation. But most of all, he screamed for his mother to help him while she just watched and watched and watched.
***
Julian shot up in bed.
Gasping in huge gulps of air, he raised his arm and wiped his face, not surprised when he found it drenched in sweat.
He knew this would happen. He knew that the day’s events would bring back those memories that he had kept buried inside the deepest parts of his mind. He wasn’t surprised that he had that dream once again, a dream that wasn’t quite a dream. He was surprised, though, about not finding Sia beside him when he awoke.
For a moment, he felt his blood run cold at the thought that she might have done something to herself, or that maybe Arthur had succeeded in getting to her. But the soft noises from near the fireplace drew his attention and calmed him.
Sia was sitting on the floor in front of the fireplace, her back to the sofa. Her head was rested on her knees and her shoulders shook softly by the force of her sobs.
Despite her state, Julian relaxed. Sia was safe.
Slowly, he got up from bed, taking the covers with him. He walked carefully over to her and called out her name softly before placing the covers around her shoulders.
She froze for an instant but relaxed after a while, wiping away her tears with her fingers when she found Julian next to her on the floor.
Sitting beside her, he pulled her into his arms and held her to him. She instinctively wrapped her arms around his chest. Julian could only imagine what Sia was going through. Arthur was her worst nightmare come to life. And even though she’d been away from him for years, he doubted the hurt would ever go away. He would know. Julian could never forget his own mother’s betrayal.
“Talk to me.” Julian urged her softly.
“Arthur,” was all Sia could say before she broke down into sobs again.
“Sshh . . . It’s over Sia. It’s over.” Julian pulled her tighter to his body and placed his head on top of hers. “I’m so, so sorry. It’s all my fault! I shouldn’t have left you.”
Her sobs quietened a little as she shook her head against his chest. “No . . . Not your f-fault. H-his . . . I hate him!”
“I know, Sia. I hate that bastard too, but right now, if there’s one person we should hate more, it’s me for not being able to protect you.” Julian shook his head. “I had only one job . . .”
Sia went very, very quiet against his chest, and her arms loosened their hold on him.
Julian was confused at her sudden stillness, until she spoke.
“I-is that all I a-am to y-you? Your j-job?” she asked,
Julian knew instantly that he had made a huge blunder. He hadn’t meant to make it sound like that. Sia wasn’t his job, she was his life.
“No.” Julian pulled back and cupped Sia’s face in his palms, forcing her to meet his eyes. “I don’t think of you as just my job. Heck, I don’t think I’ve ever thought about you as just my employee. But I made you a promise, damnit! And I failed you miserably. Even after promising that I won’t let him get to you, that was exactly what I did. You should hate me! You should be blaming me!”
Sia put her fingers on top of his lips to shut him up.
“But I don’t! I don’t h-hate you, Julian!” she said with more force than she had intended to. “I love you!”
Julian went very, very quiet. As did Sia.
She knew she’d crossed the final barrier; she’d reached the point of no return. But Sia couldn’t just sit back and let Julian take all the blame for Arthur’s crimes. Arthur was to blame for everything. He ruined her life. He made sure Sia would never be able to escape the nightmares that he’d inflicted on her. As if the past wasn’t traumatic enough, he had to come back and create more dreadful memories for her. She’d thought that being in jail would’ve changed him and made him realize his mistakes, but Arthur always had twisted morals, and being in jail had only added more dirt to his already filthy character. Julian, however, had no hand in it, so if there was anyone to blame, it would have to be that filthy bastard.
She knew Arthur would try something again. That’s why they’d set up the bait in the first place. She just hadn’t expected for the circumstances to be in Arthur’s favor.
“W-what did you just say to me?” Julian whispered, finally breaking out of his stupor.
Sia placed her hands on top of his. “I said that I love you. I’m in love with you, Julian.”
Sia felt a shudder run through Julian as he pressed his forehead to hers, holding her so tight as if he was afraid that if he let go, she’d disappear. So Sia made the first move. She leant forward and pressed her lips to Julian’s without a second thought.
Sparks instantly exploded in his system as he felt Sia’s lips connect with his softly. He felt desire like liquid heat in his blood. He wanted to deepen the kiss, to taste every nook and corner of her mouth. He wanted to continue so badly that even the thought of holding back sent a physical ache to his chest. But with utter determination, he pulled away.
Sia’s eyes were wide in shock as Julian pulled back from her. Both of them were breathing hard and neither of them seemed willing to let the other go. Sia went to touch his face, but Julian pulled back from her harshly.
“No. Not today.” That was all he could get out through his clenched teeth. He was sure Sia could see the desire in his eyes, but he wasn’t sure Sia was ready for him yet.
He expected Sia to run and be afraid of him. He was even prepared for a slap. However, his words fell on deaf ears as Sia suddenly tangled her fingers through his midnight black strands and crashed her lips to his again, kissing the life out of him.
This time, the kiss lasted longer. Hands began roaming, exploring. And it wasn’t only his. While his hands travelled the length of her spine to stop just above her hips, hers travelled all over his chest and his broad shoulders. It was when her hands began to tug at his shirt that he regained his mind back to stop her.
“No!” He broke the kiss, gasping for air, and pulled Sia away again as she tried to bring their lips back together. “Sia! You can’t!” And he didn’t even know whyuntil his brain registered what had happened to her only a few hours ago.
“You said you wanted me, Julian. You said I had to be the one to make the first move!” Sia knew she sounded desperate, but at that moment, she didn’t care.
God, did she want him—had since their first kiss in her home office. When Arthur tried to force himself on her earlier, she had realized during those horrifying moments that she wanted Julian—and only Julian—to be the one who’ll touch her. And she didn’t want to wait any longer. It had to be Julian. And it had to be now.
“Are you sure? Sia you’ve just—”
“This h
as nothing to do with Arthur! It’s about me and you. About us.”
Julian was stunned into silence and honestly, and so was she. She had no idea where she got this courage, this confidence from, but she liked it.
Julian didn’t talk anymore. He couldn’t. So he did the only thing he could at that moment. He kissed her.
Sia met him halfway, their lips moving in sync, their breathing ragged, their hearts beating against their chests.
Chapter 25
Sia moved into his touch as Julian untangled one of his hands from her hair and moved it gently down her spine. It gave him relief that Sia wasn’t just doing this to get Arthur off her mind; she was reacting to him. He would love nothing more than to erase him from Sia’s consciousness, to make sure that she would never remember him again.
This wasn’t how Julian had planned their first night together to be like. Yes, he’d wanted her to come to him of her own free will—and she had—but she had done so with shadows in her eyes and Julian’s guilty conscience weighing down heavily on his mind. He wanted their first time to be perfect, perfect for her. Julian wanted to give Sia the world and more. He wanted her to experience all the joys and pleasures that she had missed out on.
Tonight, he decided, was going to be all about her.
His palm met the smoothness of her waist, her skin warm and delicate under his calloused ones. He heard her gasp and took the opportunity to slip his tongue into her mouth. He was careful so he would not on come too strong. He stilled for a moment, letting her decide and make the next move. Sia entwined her tongue with his, beginning a sensuous game for dominance. Julian let her think she was winning, before he tipped the game in his favor and took over the kiss, exploring every ridge and corner of her mouth.
The hand that he had on her waist moved upwards until he reached her ribs, just below her breasts. He ran his fingers just below the supple mounds letting her know his intentions before he cupped her breasts in his palms. She fit him perfectly.
Sia gasped, craning her neck, and Julian took the opportunity to attend to her neck, battering it with soft, sensual kisses. He sucked her neck just above her collarbone, and she threw her head back, moaning. He liked that sound very much; it shot a ripple of pleasure through his body. Sia wasn’t like anyone he’d ever been with, and he realized, with a start, no one else mattered as much as Sia did to him.
From the days of being near and far from her, he had never thought she’d be this small against him, but she fit him perfectly. Her ivory skin was so soft that he could get addicted to it. In fact, he would not mind one bit of it. He had known that once he had her, it would never be enough. What he felt for her was too overwhelming to be true and yet, as his lips moved over her skin and his fingers traced her body, it was very, very real.
Feeling desire burn hot and hard in his blood, he drew back, much to Sia’s protest. With his hands under her knees, he picked her up in his arms and carried her to his bed. It was his first time with Sia, and he didn’t want it to be on the floor like they were animals. He laid her gently down on the mattress and stood back to take off his shirt before he joined her in bed, covering her body with his. If he could give her nothing else, he’d give her tenderness and love. He’ll show her how a man truly made love to a woman.
***
Sia felt herself tremble from within. There was an ache inside of her that she knew only Julian could soothe, and she didn’t like the fact that Julian was treating her like a glass doll. But a thought crossed her mind that maybe she was comparing Julian’s tenderness to Arthur’s rough violence. Maybe this was how men and women really made love. Sia felt a burst of excitement at the fact that she was finally going to find out how men and women really made love. She couldn’t help but feel impatient to learn as well.
And then Julian was lying her on the bed and taking his shirt off, and any other thought vanished from Sia’s mind. She couldn’t help but admire the raw masculinity of Julian with wide-eyed innocence. He was a big man, all sinew and muscles, while she wasn’t perfect like the models she’d worked with.
She noticed his chest had scars all over them. Some tiny specks of white and brown lines while some stood out with their considerable size. From small nicks to the skin to wicked-looking knife wounds. They only added to his dangerous aura. Julian had stiffened over her, holding himself in place with his hands on either side of her head. He was probably thinking she was scared. But Sia wasn’t, far from it. She could never be scared of Julian.
With shaking hands, she touched one of his scars. It was old and a faint white line was all that remained of it. Sia lifted her face to plant a soft kiss to the scarred skin and felt Julian relax under her palms and a shudder go through his body. When she looked up at his face, she saw that his eyes were closed, his lips parted on a sigh.
She ran her hands down his toned body and back up to his chest. The scars felt rough under her palm, sending tingles down her spine and causing heat to pool in between her legs. These scars wear a part of Julian, a part of the man she loved . . . who belonged to her.
The sudden possessiveness should have scared her. She had never believed anyone ever belonged to her, but then she realized that shehad belonged to him—body, mind, and soul. She decided she loved the idea of belonging to him. Daring to do something that she had never tried in her life, Sia raised her head towards Julian’s chest and flicked her tongue over one of his taunt nipples.
A groan left Julian’s mouth and before Sia had any chance of repeating her previous action, Julian pinned her to the bed and kissed her again. This time, his kiss was all raw heat and hunger. He had been very patient with Sia for as long as he could, but he wasn’t a saint, and his patience and control were a hair’sbreadth away from snapping completely. Taking the hem of her shirt in both his hands, he all but tore it in half and flung it over the side of the bed. When his eyes met hers, she saw the hunger, the iron-clad control . . . and the tenderness. If she wanted him to stop right now, she knew he would do it for her, but she didn’t want to. For the first time in her life, Sia didn’t cower away from a man’s hungry eyes. She welcomed it.
***
Her breathing came in short pants, and she pushed her perfectly rounded breasts forward, begging for his attention. She was perfect for him with her soft creamy flesh and her delicate beauty. The only thing that stood out amongst the inches of soft, tender flesh where the gashes that Arthur had inflicted on her.
No! He fought with his conscience and his anger. This was about Sia, about them. He wouldn’t let Arthur poison what they had between them. What they had was beautiful and pure, and tonight, he’d focus completely on Sia and make her feel everything that she had never felt from a real man before.
Flicking his tongue across one budded nipple, he watched with divine pleasure as she moaned his name and arched her back off the mattress, molding their bare bodies together. The pleasure of feeling her soft, naked skin over his was exquisite, and he wanted to please her more. So, he continued his assault of her breasts with his sinful mouth—kissing, biting, and sucking both mounds—while one of his hands drifted downwards ‘till they found the waistband of her boxers.
He felt her suck in a breath, and he waited, afraid that it might have scared her. Then she bucked her hips, signalling for him to continue which he gladly did. His fingers slid inside her boxers and found the silken curls just above her womanhood. Julian kept his mouth on her breasts and let one of his fingers glide smoothly over her sensitive lips. Sia thrashed around under him, trying to find something to give her a release. Julian knew she was close to an orgasm, but not close enough. She seemed extremely sensitive to him, he thought, and he found that extremely pleasing.
He lightly bit on her right nipple while his hand tugged at some of those delicious curls. The satisfaction of hearing her moan his name was something else. So, he slipped his hands further down and parted the folds of her most intimate lips. He was surprised to find that she was already wet.
He moved his f
ace downwards, kissing his way down her body. He stopped just inches above her boxers and looked into her face to ask for her permission. Sia’s eyes were closed in pleasure, her expression that of a woman in the throes of passion. A thin film of sweat clung to her body, adding an attractive sheen to her already beautiful skin. His control was on the verge of snapping, but he reined it in with teeth-gritting strength.
***
Sia opened her eyes and looked at Julian, her green eyes shining with pleasure and trust. He asked her with his eyes if he should continue. Sia knew that if she said no, he’d end it then and there, no matter how hard it was for him. But Sia nodded her head and, with a sigh of relief, Julian removed her boxers, threw them over his shoulders and feasted his eyes on her. She was absolutely beautiful, absolutely perfect. Julian bent his head and kissed her chest, right on top of her heart, before kissing his way down once again until he found her folds and plunged his tongue into the heavenly sweetness that was her.
Sia bucked her hips off the mattress from the pleasure of Julian’s tongue dancing in her core. The sensations she was having was nothing she had ever experienced before. Arthur was always in it for his own pleasure, never letting her feel, never waiting for her to get adjusted. But Julian . . . Julian felt like an addiction. He was giving her pleasure in ways she never knew was possible. She could feel his tongue inside her, teasing her, tasting her, marking her. And she didn’t mind that at all.
A sudden feeling started building in the pit of her stomach. She’d felt it before but never had it felt thisgood. She thrashed in bed, wanting more of it but also wanting it to end. Her emotions were jumbled up. She didn’t know what she wanted anymore, but Julian did. Julian’s tongue moved faster. His hands found her nipples, while hers clutched the comforters desperately. The feeling built . . . built . . . and then . . .
