by Piper James
“I begged Rafe to bring me here. He says the onion rings are to die for,” Ivy gushed, and I came this close to kicking her under the table.
Jessa gave me a strange look before refocusing on Ivy. “Well, I hope you enjoy them. Let me know if you need anything.”
“Thanks, Jessa,” Ivy said.
My eyes locked on Jessa’s ass as she walked away, and something stirred inside me. I was really starting to have a hard time convincing myself I didn’t want her.
Because I did. Want her. Bad.
“Well, isn’t this interesting?” Ivy said, giving me an impish grin. “You’re practically salivating over her plump ass, and she’s kind of pissed because she thinks we’re on a date.”
“No, I’m not, and what do you mean she’s pissed?”
“Oh, Rafe. You’re so clueless, it’s almost adorable. That girl wants you, and now she’s jealous because she thinks you’re with me.”
Jealous? Could Ivy actually be right?
12
Jessa
Oh, my God. I can’t believe I just did that.
I saw Rafe sitting in the booth, and didn’t think twice about going over to say hi. I’d been…excited to see him. Like, maybe he’d come here to see me.
And I’d had such tunnel-vision that I failed to notice he had company. He was on a date with a drop-dead gorgeous blonde, and I hated her. Okay, maybe hate was a strong word. She seemed like a nice person. Friendly, even.
But Rafe had obviously been uncomfortable with me speaking to her, and the whole encounter was just awkward. At least, it was for me. Ivy Anderson didn’t have an awkward bone in her perfect, suntanned body.
And what was that bit about the onion rings? Sure, we had them on the menu, but nobody ever ordered them because they were the cheap, frozen kind. We only kept them on hand for families that came in for lunch or dinner. Kids liked them, but no self-respecting adult would touch them.
I didn’t even know Rafe had been in here before, much less liked the low-quality junk food on the menu.
So, did he make the whole thing up to get his date to come here? Did he want to flaunt her in front of me?
Maybe he was catching some low-key vibes that I was attracted to him and wanted to nip it in the bud. Parading his girlfriend around my bar would certainly send home that message.
So now she’s his girlfriend? And no one is parading anywhere. Get a grip, Jessa.
“Jessa!”
I looked up at the sound of my name, half-fearful it was the beautiful Ivy, but instead, I saw Karly and Felicia sliding into the table they used the other night. They were waving and smiling, and I couldn’t help but return their grins as I waved back.
With a mumbled word to the other bartender, I rounded the bar and headed out to greet them. The bar was in that lull between when dinner ended and the bar hoppers showed up, so I slid into an empty chair to chat for a minute.
And, of course, Karly led with an enthusiastic, “Isn’t that Rafe Walton over there?”
“Yes,” I hissed, motioning for her to keep quiet.
“I’ve never seen him in here before,” Felicia mused, her fingertips stroking her chin.
“His date said she begged him to bring her here after he raved about the onion rings,” I offered.
“Ha! No offense, Jessa, but the onion rings here are shit,” Karly blurted, earning an elbow to the ribs from Felicia.
“None taken,” I laughed. “I know they are, which is why I’m so confused. He obviously made that up, so why would he bring her here on a night I’m working? To send me some kind of message?”
“I don’t know,” Felicia said slowly. “Oh, hey, we never traded numbers before. Give me your phone, and I’ll program my and Karly’s numbers in.”
I pulled the device from my back pocket, unlocked the screen, and handed it over without a second thought. Felicia entered her information, then asked Karly to say her number, because honestly, who had numbers memorized these days, anyway? But as she continued to tap the screen, I became suspicious.
“What are you doing?”
Felicia’s smile was pure evil. “I’m texting Dr. Hottie over there to ask him if that’s his girlfriend.”
“What? No! Felicia, stop.”
Her dark gaze locked on mine. “Are you sure? We can grapple over the phone a bit, so when he looks over here, he’ll know I sent the text. Not you.”
“No,” I said, shaking my head vehemently. “It’s too embarrassing, and I don’t really want to know, anyway.”
She shrugged and handed me the phone. “It’s your loss. If you want him, you should go for it.”
“I told you, I don’t want him,” I said, tucking my phone away.
“Yeah, yeah,” Karly droned. “We heard what you said.”
Her tone intimated they didn’t believe my denials about wanting Rafe. Hell, I didn’t really believe them. But the fear of failure, of starting something only to be abandoned and heartbroken…that fear practically immobilized me any time I thought of throwing caution to the wind.
I looked at Karly, then let my eyes trail to Felicia. They tended to playfully insult each other, but I could tell that when it came down to it, they had each other’s backs. They really enjoyed each other’s company. They had fun.
And suddenly, I really wanted that. Just because I didn’t trust romance and love didn’t mean I couldn’t make some friends. I wanted someone to trust. Someone who would trust me. And something about these women called to my soul.
“Do you girls know why I am the way I am?” I blurted before I could stop myself.
“What do you mean?” Felicia asked, cocking her head.
“What way are you?” Karly added.
“We need drinks for this,” I said. “Be right back.”
I walked to the bar and asked Heath, the bartender, to make three frozen margaritas and to put them on my tab. He whipped them up and set the glasses on a tray for me. Carrying them with practiced ease, I set them on the table as the girls gushed their thanks.
As I took a sip of my drink, I felt eyes on me. My skin burned as I wondered if Rafe was watching and if he’d condemn me for drinking on the job. Whatever. This is a bar, not a hospital. I took another big gulp before refocusing on Felicia and Karly.
“I’ve never really let myself get close to anyone,” I started. When they didn’t interrupt with questions, I went on. “My mother left my dad when I was a newborn. She only married him for his money, and never wanted kids. After I was born, she couldn’t handle the responsibility—my dad refused to let me be passed off to nannies full time—so she divorced him, took fifty percent of his estate, and took off, never contacting us again.”
“What a bitch,” Karly mumbled, earning a gasp and a backhanded smack from Felicia.
I laughed despite myself, saying, “No, Karly’s right. She was a bitch. Dad got me and the big house, which he sold to buy a smaller home for us. He put most of his assets into opening this place, and the rest is history.”
I took another sip of my margarita as I let them mull that over.
“So, because your mom left you, you’re what? Afraid to get close to anyone?” Karly asked.
“Because you think they’ll leave you, too,” Felicia added.
“Bingo,” I said, slurping down more of my drink.
The tequila was starting to hit me, making me feel a little looser and more relaxed. I was glad I’d opened up to Felicia and Karly. We could still be friends when I went back to Atlanta, right? I came home to visit Dad pretty regularly, and we could stay in touch between visits. It would just take a little work.
“That’s a pretty fucked up outlook on life, Jessa,” Felicia said, and I nearly spewed margarita all over her.
“Yeah, I call bullshit,” Karly added, raising her eyebrows as her red curls bounced around her head.
“What do you mean?” I shot back.
“We don’t want to downplay what your mom did to you and your dad. It was shitty and she deserv
es a major ass-whooping, but you can’t let her choices define you, Jessa. Life is full of heartbreak. It’s part of growing up. Learning to deal with that heartbreak is a major life lesson, but the pain is worth the reward,” Felicia said.
“Those first days of falling in love, the thrill of it is indescribable,” Karly added, swooning a little in her chair. “Holding hands and first kisses are the best.”
“How much tequila did Hunky Heath put in her drink?” Felicia deadpanned.
“I am not drunk,” Karly said. “I just love love.”
“The point is,” Felicia said, looking back at me, “without pain, there’s no joy. Without fear, there’s no courage. And without heartbreak, there’s no love.”
“Did you read that in a fortune cookie?” Karly quipped, laughing uproariously at her own joke.
I tried to hold my laughter in, which ended up bursting free in a loud snort. Felicia lost her own control at the sound of it, and I felt lighter, freer than I ever had as we leaned sideways in our chairs and giggled.
Without my consent, my eyes drifted over to Rafe’s table. He looked away quickly, but not before I caught him staring. I could practically hear him whistling as his eyes darted toward the ceiling, then the bar…anywhere but in my direction.
A smile curved my lips, then I locked gazes with the gorgeous Ivy. Her own smile was heavenly as one eye closed in an exaggerated wink. Her face went blank and innocent a second later, and I saw Rafe staring at her with narrowed eyes.
What was that all about?
Shaking my head, I refocused on my friends. It felt good, thinking of them that way. I laughed as Karly shared funny stories about her job at the temp agency and all the weird positions they’d had her fill at different companies.
Felicia was a paralegal with a local law firm. She’d graduated from law school, but was taking her time to study for the bar exam. Karly joked about her being a scaredy-cat, and I almost threw Felicia’s own words back in her face, but I refrained.
Karly did not. “What was that bullshit you were spewing about fear and courage?” she asked.
Felicia flipped her off with a sarcastic chuckle, to which Karly responded, “Aww, I love you, too, babe.”
The door opened, and group of people crowded inside. I took another sip of my drink, which was still half-full, and stood up.
“I guess I better get back to work,” I said. “Thanks for…thanks.”
My words were stilted and awkward, but the girls didn’t seem to notice. They waved and blew kisses, and Karly dragged my half-empty margarita in front of her with a hearty thanks. I signaled to Heath that I was going to the bathroom, then would be out to help him.
When I came out and took my place behind the bar, Rafe and his date were gone. A confusing mix of disappointment and relief surged through me. I ignored the feeling, throwing myself into mixing cocktails and pouring beer. Heath sidled up beside me, pushing a slip of paper into my hand.
“A customer left this for you,” he said before getting back to work.
I unfolded the paper and read the words written in pretty handwriting.
I think my best friend has a crush on you.
—Ivy
p.s. The onion rings here are terrible ;)
Best friend? So…she wasn’t his girlfriend? Or even his date?
I couldn’t help it. My mouth curved into a wide smile and stayed like that. By the end of the night my cheeks hurt, but it was unavoidable. I couldn’t stop grinning.
13
Rafe
I threw the game controller down beside me and pulled my headset off. I couldn’t concentrate, and the gamers I usually played with were starting to get on my nerves with their heckling and insults of my shitty gaming. Getting shot in the head for the eighth time was the final straw. I just wasn’t feeling it tonight.
I blamed Jessa Maddox.
Actually, I mostly blamed Ivy and her nonstop needling about Jessa and my supposed feelings for her. I tried to convince her that while, yes, I did find Jessa attractive, that didn’t mean I was developing feelings for her. I barely knew her.
But no matter how many times I told Ivy she was being ridiculous, she didn’t give up. She went on and on about how the heart knows what it wants, and I should just admit that the only reason I dragged her to The Bullpen was to see Jessa and get Ivy’s opinion—which was one hundred percent positive.
It was those goddamn onion rings. They were awful, but I ate them with as much gusto as I could manage. That was my story, and I was sticking to it.
I leaned my head back and groaned. Why couldn’t I get this girl out of my head? Just thinking about her in that damn white tank top and those tight jeans was making me hard. I reached down and adjusted myself, determined to ignore the way my dick was demanding attention.
I didn’t have time for a distraction like Jessa. I needed to focus on helping people, keeping tabs on Nate and Lola, and making sure I kept myself healthy…so I could help other people. Letting myself think about her, about what having her in my life might be like—it felt selfish.
Besides, she was going to leave soon. There was zero chance of us having a relationship with her living several hours away. I barely had any free time as it was. I certainly didn’t have time to travel for a long-distance relationship.
I sat up, energy zipping through me as my thoughts really hit me. If there really was zero chance of anything coming of it, what was stopping me from going for it? If Jessa was game, and I’d be very clear with her up front, why shouldn’t we have a little fun while she was in town?
Everyone kept telling me I should think of myself every once in a while. Taking Jessa Maddox to bed would definitely fall into that category. Touching her, tasting her, bringing her pleasure…it would bring me some much-needed pleasure for a while with no long-term commitment. We could have some fun while she was in town, then that would be it.
My erection grew even harder at the thought, but I ignored it. I was on to something, and I blatantly disregarded the tiny voice in my head that told me I was rationalizing the situation.
I wanted her. All I needed to know was if she wanted me, too.
I pulled out my phone and brought up Jessa’s number before I could talk myself out of it. It was mid-morning, so I assumed she’d be awake. I had a rare day off, but I was on call, so I needed to do this before I got interrupted by the hospital.
Me: Hey.
I tapped the send button, then cursed myself for sending such a lame text.
Jessa: Hey.
Oh, shit. I had no clue what to say.
Me: How’s your dad?
Fuck. That was stupid. I didn’t want to talk about her dad. I wanted to talk about her body. Beneath mine. Or on top. Jesus.
Jessa: About the same. Still coughing, but no fever.
Me: Oh, that’s good.
Me: About the no fever.
Oh, my God, I fucking suck at this.
Jessa: Yeah.
I clenched my teeth and took a deep breath as I tapped out my next message.
Me: It was good seeing you at the bar the other night.
I watched as the bubble popped up, telling me she was responding. Then it disappeared. Then it popped up again. Then disappeared again.
Shit. Should I say something else? Change the subject?
Jessa: Yeah, it was good to see you, too.
Yes!
Me: So, did you see the Braves’ game last night?
I’m such an idiot. Why am I texting about baseball now?
Jessa: No, but Dad watched it. I heard him screaming from the bedroom.
All I read were the words “screaming” and “bedroom,” and I started to sweat.
Me: I hope he didn’t overdo it. He needs rest right now, more than anything.
Why am I still talking about her dad’s medical condition? God, I really do suck at this.
Me: So, anyway, do you have any plans for today?
Jessa: Not really. I don’t have to work.
&
nbsp; Me: Me neither.
Jessa: Cool.
I was losing her attention. I could tell. It was now, or never.
Me: Do you want to go out for lunch?
There. Lunch was simple. A casual meal between friends. We could get to know each other better without the pressure that dinner entails.
Jessa: Sure. Will Ivy be joining us?
“Oh, shit,” I mumbled. Did she think Ivy and I were dating? I did bring her to the bar with me, but that was just so I wouldn’t have to go alone.
Me: No, Ivy is working today. At the hospital. Where we work. Together. As colleagues.
Real smooth, asshole.
Jessa: Oh, okay. Where should we meet?
“Yes!” I shouted, pumping my fist into the air. I didn’t give myself a second to rethink this or even consider that it might be a bad idea.
Me: I can pick you up at your house.
Jessa: Or I could pick you up.
I laughed and texted her back with my address.
Jessa: See you at one?
Me: It’s a date.
“Shit, why did I send that?” I grumbled.
She didn’t respond, and I let myself worry over it for about thirty seconds before shrugging it off. I was too excited, and I jumped off the couch to take a shower.
I didn’t want to agonize over how Jessa might have interpreted my words. I didn’t want to concentrate on why I was so fucking excited to go to lunch with her. It was happening, and I couldn’t stop smiling.
14
Jessa
I sat in my Jeep—my fingers strangling the life from the steering wheel—for several minutes in front of Rafe’s house. I had no clue what I was doing. Why had I agreed to this?
And why had I felt that not-so-tiny shiver of pleasure when he’d texted, It’s a date?
Other than a few misguided one-night stands in college, I’d never really dated before. I had no clue what to say or how to act. I’d insisted on driving, thinking I’d feel more comfortable in my own vehicle, but now I was second-guessing myself, wondering if I’d sounded like a bitch, refusing to ride in his car with him.
