"Momma," she said. "I want Momma."
Dora's heart broke at the child's cries. "Shhhh, honey, it's all right. Wake up, sweetie."
Rocking her gently, she wasn't certain if she was crying out or awoke from a nightmare.
"I want Momma," she said again, tears cascading down her face.
Not knowing how to ease her sadness, she simply held her and rocked the little girl while her own tears slid down her cheeks.
She didn't understand why God had taken their mother and left their worthless father. Yet, she couldn't let herself become too attached to Jesse's family. If life was fair, they should belong to her and Leo, not him and Ida.
Regardless, the children weren't at fault because her husband's lying created so many problems. These kids were innocents.
Finally the little girl’s sobs quieted, but Dora continued to comfort her. In a soft voice, she asked, "Will I ever see Momma again?"
The question ripped at Dora's soul and she wanted to scream why this mother? Why this child?
"Your mom is in heaven. If she could, she would have stayed here with you. When she realized she had to leave you behind, her heart must have been broken. And yes, someday when you die, she will be there to greet you and tell you hello."
While Dora didn't know this with certainty, this child needed answers. "In fact, I bet your mother is looking over you right now and wishing she could hug you and tell you good night."
The little girl nodded. "Momma told us she would always be watching over us. But I would really like to look at her again. I don't want to forget her."
The child's words left Dora's chest aching with pain again. In the darkness, Dora felt tears rolling down her cheeks. "Then don't. Every night or even during the day when you get scared, picture your mother's face. The way she smiled at you when she told you she loved you."
A deep sigh escaped her. "Thank you," she said. "Anytime I have a bad dream, I'm going to think of Momma."
"That's right. She'll chase the bad away. Can you go back to sleep now?"
"Uh-huh," the child said.
"Good." She laid the girl on the bed, covered her, and kissed her on the forehead. "Night, Ella."
The little girl didn't answer, and she became aware she was asleep.
As Dora made her way across the room to her bed, where she lay for hours, sadness filled her as she thought about Jesse's family, understanding she was becoming too involved. Ella clung to her needing a mother figure and the baby too. Both children searching for the loving parent they lost.
Grace understood the realities of death and dying. Dora was just a woman passing through their lives and she refused to even be friends. Grace held a firm grip on her responsibilities and yet she was a child herself.
Waiting for the dawn, listening to the steady breathing of the children and Jesse, she wished they were her family. Oh, how she wanted Jesse and her to share wedding vows and these three kids be a result of their union. But that was a dream and not reality.
Dora still belonged to another man. A woman who believed in the vows of until death do you part, she would not consider breaking that bond. Only Leo cheated and tried to take a short cut. Now these children were a product of the lies and schemes of his cheating.
As they ate breakfast in a restaurant the next morning, Jesse glanced at Ella. Yesterday had upset the poor kid and last night she suffered nightmares. The woman had comforted the little girl. In fact, at the oddest moments, she would soothe a child. Just like running out into the street and grabbing Ella.
This made no sense.
"For a woman who hates kids, you were up last night comforting Ella," he said.
"Oh, so you lay there awake and let me get up and comfort her," she retorted. "The only reason I got up was to stop the kid from crying."
Dora was lying. Last night, he heard her sniffling as she comforted the child.
"That's why you told her to always think of her momma when she got scared?"
The woman's eyes narrowed. "She's your responsibility, not mine."
"True," he said. "You did a really great job of comforting her."
The scathing look he received should have warned him to back off, but something between what she said and the way she acted didn't make sense. The two were at odds.
The woman took a bite of her eggs and made a humph noise. "The poor kid was frightened. Seeing her daddy last night really shook her up. This is the kind of stuff you should be prepared to deal with as their caretaker."
As she finished her breakfast, she laid down her napkin and glared at him. "The next time she starts crying in the night, I'll expect you to comfort her. And if we're sharing a bedroom, which, please Lord, not again, I will wake you and say get up and make her shut up."
Part of him wanted to laugh at how upset she was getting. The children always seemed to agitate her, and he didn't understand why. Was it because these kids, except for Grace, belonged to his sister or because of some other reason?
"Why didn't you and Leo have kids?"
For a moment, he feared she would throw her coffee at him as her eyes narrowed and blazed with a heated stare that should have ignited his hair on fire.
"That is none of your business. Like I've said before, I didn't want kids. Still don't."
Something wasn't right and he had yet to figure out what, but she was lying. Eventually he planned on learning everything he could about this woman who intrigued him. The wife of his hated archenemy.
"Where are your kids?" she asked him. "Why aren't you married?"
A simple story. One of duty to his sister. One he would never give up on. One where their father would never take these children from him. They were his now, though he would still like a couple more.
"Raised Ida, built up my business and now that I'm ready to start dating women, boom, my own instant family. Someday I want a son to carry on the family name and a daughter who looks like her mother, whoever that should be."
"So you want even more children," she said.
"Yes, I do. If I have my way, I would like a whole passel of kids on the farm."
For as long as he could remember, he’d dreamed of having a big family.
"Then you better start looking for a wife," she said. "Time’s running out."
A laugh escaped him. "Hardly. Who needs to search? When you're as good looking as I am, the women come running. Then you choose the one you want. Unfortunately, I haven't found one I'd say I do with yet."
"Ohhhh," she said, making a mournful sound. "No one makes the man happy. So, so, sad. Better luck next time."
A grin spread across his face and he leaned in. "I'm hoping I'm gazing at someone I want to try out."
Like a porcupine, she bristled and he knew he said the wrong thing. "I don't do try outs."
With a quick glance at the table where the children sat eating, he noticed Grace staring at the two of them. Her forehead scrunched, lips in a frown, her sapphire eyes narrowed.
Of all the children, she had kept her thoughts of her mother's death a secret. Not complaining, not crying--but rather moving through the motions of everyday living, taking care of her siblings. She wiped the baby's face and he squealed with discontent. Sometime soon, Grace needed to become a child again.
While her childhood slipped away, she had become their nursemaid.
He longed for and wanted a wife. Someone to help him raise these children and give him more babies. With a quick glance at Dora, he smiled. The woman would be perfect, if she liked children and would stop acting like a man.
She claimed not to like kids and that seemed odd. Her words didn't fit her personality. But why would she lie?
"Time to get started," she said, rising from the table. "The day is getting away from us and we need to reach Dallas."
She was right. They were wasting valuable daylight and the con man couldn't be that far ahead of them. Once they dropped the kids off at his aunts in the next day or two, the sooner this trip would be over.
The
n what? Would Dora kick them off the farm? And if she did, where would they go? His small house could not hold three cats, let alone three children.
Later that night, they finally pulled the wagon over to camp not far from Dallas. By day after tomorrow, they should reach the town and Jesse's Aunt Matilda.
Though she would miss them, Dora would be relieved when the children were no longer there. The baby would come over and smile at her and say Momma, and every time a piece of her heart would splinter off.
While she tried to keep a wall around her fragile emotions, it was getting harder and harder to appear the mean person who didn't like children. When all she really wanted was to grab and love them.
They were Leo and Ida's babies. Not hers and Leo's. She had to keep saying that to herself.
Grace had tagged her as the enemy and the girl did everything she could to keep her brother and sister away from her. Probably, it was for the best and though Dora had done nothing to the child and even tried to help her, she could no longer accept her snotty attitude.
While Jesse went in search of wood and some fresh game, Grace sent her glares across the fire. Finally, she’d had enough.
"I'm not the enemy," she said to the young girl.
"Don't know if you are or not," Grace said, preparing the pallets for the night. "You're not our mother."
That was the problem. Grace was jealous of how Ella and Ben reacted to Dora. "No, I'm not. I'm someone who will soon ride out of your life. So, don't worry about me trying to take your mother's place, because that's not going to happen."
The girl’s eyebrows narrowed, and she considered her words. Dora stepped away to spread her bedroll on the other side of the fire away from the children. To make Grace happy, but also to protect her heart, she needed distance.
Tomorrow she would try to spend more time riding and less time in the wagon. They were Jesse's responsibility and he could drive the team.
The thought of Jesse warmed her. Handsome as sin, and even though he'd kissed her once, she had discouraged any further physical touches. With three kids in their midst, it was beyond impossible, plus, she was not the woman he would want. The man wanted children and her womb was as barren as the desert.
"Ben, step away from the fire," Grace called. "Ella, get your brother."
Poor Ella as the middle child, she was always being yelled at. Dora watched the toddler, but the girl didn't move until he started to fall way too close to the flames for comfort. Jumping up, Dora caught him and led him from the fire to his quilt where she showed him his blocks once again.
The snap of a twig had her jerking toward the darkness, her hand on her pistols.
"Daddy?" Ella said, and Dora whirled around to face Leo's pistol.
He was one stupidly brave man to walk into camp with his gun drawn and his children with them.
"Dora," he said, "as you can see, I've risen from the dead."
Rage like nothing she ever felt coursed through her veins and she had to take a steadying breath. "And you're a lot richer."
Leo laughed as his three kids ran toward him and wrapped their tiny arms around his waist. "Hello, kids."
The children loved him unconditionally and he wasn't worthy of their love, their devotion. At the sight, Dora wondered if they’d had children, would he have stolen her money and found another woman?
"Momma's dead," Ella said, standing back staring at him.
"Yes, you told me last night," he said. "Come here, honey, I couldn't talk to you then. Mean men chased me."
Ella reluctantly stepped into his one-armed embrace, he patted her on the head. "You're still daddy's girl."
The manipulation of his own children made Dora nauseous.
"So what are you doing with my kids and why are you following me? The money is long gone and you're never getting your inheritance back."
All the pent-up anger Dora had held onto for the last few months seemed to explode and spew from her mouth. "Yes, I saw that you bought me a nice farm. Though if your wife had still been alive, I'm sure we could share lots of notes on how bad a husband you are."
"That doesn't answer why you're following me."
With his children standing at his side, she couldn't tell him she planned on killing him. She couldn't, not in front of them. "Wanted you to understand, I knew you were alive."
"So now I know. Stop following me."
Some things she would keep to herself and surprise him. "You have nothing to worry about unless there's a bounty on your head. Then you better be looking over your shoulder."
Patting his son on his head, he pushed him away. "What are you talking about?"
The man needed shaking up and she aimed to do just that. "These guns in my holster are there for a reason. A money-making, catching-criminals reason."
A smirk crossed his face as his feet moved backward toward the edge of the woods. Once again, he was going to sneak out of here, leaving his children all upset.
"When I ran out of money, I had to find something to earn me cash. So I trained and became a bounty hunter. Oh how I wish I could arrest you. Until you've got a price on your head, you're free and clear. Look out if you're wanted. Because I will haul you into jail so fast, your head won't have time to spin."
Throwing back his head, his laughter echoed in the camp. "Now that I would like to see."
Jesse who had been hunting fire wood stepped into the light and dropped the sticks as he stared at his brother-in-law. Watching his gun hand.
"Good to see you," Leo said, nodding at Jesse, the pistol still aimed at Dora. "Your sister must have gotten in touch with you before she died."
At first, Jesse didn't respond. "You can't take the children. On her deathbed, she asked me to care for them and I will."
She was proud of the way Jesse stood up to Leo, refusing to let him have the kids, though she doubted he wanted them. His own children were pawns in his game, but mainly they would just get in his way.
Leo smiled. "Always your sister’s knight in shining armor. Why didn't you save her?"
Jesse's fists clenched and she understood the pain those words inflicted on him.
"Poison. Your miracle drink killed her."
Shaking his head, Leo unwrapped Grace's and Lee's hands from around his waist. "I don't believe you. Ida helped me make the batch."
"Well, the miracle cure killed her and almost Dora. From what I heard, your drink also was the end for the preacher's wife in the last town we were in."
The man ran his free hand over his face. "No, you lie. It's not true."
In shock, Leo stood contemplating, his brows drawn together in a frown of disbelief. Maybe he loved Ida; Dora didn't know, didn't have any insight into their marriage. Though Jesse did tell her she said a lot of the same things about Leo that Dora had.
Ida might have found herself stuck - married to a man she didn't care for, just like Dora.
"Daddy, Momma got real sick after she drank your juice. Dora too," Ella said, gazing at her father like she didn't trust him.
Grace glared at Dora like this was all her fault, but she didn't say anything defending her father or her mother.
"No, nothing in that drink should make you ill. Something else made her sick. Ida has been drinking that juice for years. I don't understand what happened."
"Did you pick the right mushrooms?"
In the firelight, his gun hand sagged and the questions were beginning to form. Could she kick the pistol away from him? Taking Leo down was too much of a risk with the children so near him.
Listening to the two men, Dora didn't say anything, but merely stood, wishing he would either put down his weapon or walk away. Right now, with the children present, she would do nothing to harm him. But once they were in Dallas, Leo's life wouldn't be worth the next bottle of miracle cure.
"Don't sell any more of those bottles," Jesse said, warning him. "People will die."
Placing the baby in front of him, he continued to inch toward the woods where he slinked from. Ang
er rushed through her veins at the way he used his son as a shield. What a coward.
"Cash is king and I need the money," he said. Taking Grace's arm, he pulled her in as a shield. "Make certain they don't follow me."
As he turned and ran into the darkened woods, Grace stared at her and Jesse like she would knock them down if they went after him.
Finally unable to stop herself, Dora glared at Grace. "Relax, I'm not going anywhere in the darkness. There will come a day when I will get my revenge, just not today."
Chapter 6
The kids were down for the night. Surprisingly, Dora did not help get them ready for bed. Instead, she walked to the edge of their camp and paced back and forth like a caged animal. Tension radiated from her crossed arms. Her stance was rigid, and the way she strode told him to stay away. Occasionally, he thought he heard her weeping.
Damn Leo for showing up and creating more strain. Grace snapped at everyone. Ella cried and the baby wanted to be held. Normally she pitched in, helping him prepare the children for the night. Tonight, Dora retreated to face her own demons and he would be shocked if she remained here in the morning.
He needed to talk to her and find out what besides Leo she was so upset about. After the kids had finally gone to sleep, he noticed she lay in her bedroll, her eyes wide open as she stared at the stars.
"Gorgeous Texas night," he said softly, not wanting to wake the little ones.
She didn't respond but continued to stare.
"Did you see how he used the children? Especially Grace? Given a chance, he will train them to be just like himself. Always looking for a way to cheat other people."
Silence.
"How did you two ever marry?" he asked. How could two opposites be united? Then again, Leo had a way of charming women, showing his best side, and after he married them, out came his worst behavior. Jesse witnessed his mistreatment with his sister.
With a sigh, she turned over in her bedroll and leaned on her elbow. "My father. Leo connived my father into thinking he was the man I needed and Papa believed him. Now looking back, my father died suddenly. His death, the reason I received my inheritance. I can't help but wonder if Leo had something to do with his sudden illness."
Lipstick and Lead Series: The Complete Box Set With a Bonus Book Page 108
