by Penelope Sky
That was all it took—a few seconds.
I gripped the back of his neck and moaned in his face, my cunt squeezing him hard, constricting around his length like a strong grip. When he made me come, tears usually sprouted from my eyes, which was something I’d never done before him. He made me come in a different way, made me explode in a way other men never could. Even when we wore a condom, he made it happen, so it was either his size, the way he used it, or because we fell in love almost instantly.
He pounded me into the bed as he watched me, working his body hard to keep the climax going, to squeeze the juice from the lemon and make it last as long as possible. He ground his body against my clit after every thrust, pleasing me like he knew exactly where all my triggers were—and when to hit them.
I finished with tears dripping to my ears, my nails carving him like a pumpkin on Halloween.
He watched my performance without interrupting his own, and once the preliminary orgasms were out of the way, he changed, turned into the aggressive man who used to boss me around. “This pussy is mine.” He increased the effect of his words with his hard thrusts, slamming his dick through my come as well as his. “Fucking mine.” Sometimes he made love to me, told me he loved me, kissed me like he wanted to feel our souls wrap around each other. But sometimes, he just wanted to claim me, to remind me that I belonged to him, that he wouldn’t let me go—not now, not ever.
I wasn’t sure which I liked more.
Heath made dinner in the kitchen, wearing only his sweatpants. He wasn’t afraid of the hot oil splashing onto his naked body, because he always seemed to put just the right amount into the pan.
His fair skin had returned to its natural color, with a few scars that were mostly hidden on his tattooed skin. I suspected the ink obscured most of his injuries, so it was misleading, but he was much better, nonetheless.
I pulled the plates out of the cabinet, wearing his shirt with my panties underneath. We returned to the quiet companionship we used to share, making dinner with little conversation, just comfortable being together.
He scooped the food out of the pan then added the veggies next.
“Looks good.”
“Talking about me or the food?” he teased.
“Both.”
We sat at the dining table and each had a glass of wine. Now that he was off his medication, he could enjoy alcohol again, but he seemed to have gotten used to living without it because he didn’t drink as much as he used to.
I watched him as I stabbed my fork into my food and took a bite. “Thank you for dinner.” He always cooked for me when I stayed over, making a gourmet meal with his expensive pans and fancy cooking oil.
“Don’t thank me,” he said as he kept eating. “What’s mine is yours.”
“I do have one complaint…”
He lifted his gaze, his expression hard at my words.
“Maybe have some sweets once in a while…”
A soft smile sprinkled his lips. “I’m surprised you would ask that.”
“Once in a while isn’t going to hurt.”
He continued to eat. “I’m glad your attitude about food has changed.”
“I do eat more with you. But I also jog now, to keep it off.”
“When?”
“Before I take a shower. I’m not big on exercise, but I force myself to do it.”
“You don’t need to,” he said. “But whatever makes you happy.”
I was glad I had a man who didn’t care about my weight. Men I’d been with complimented my figure, but they wouldn’t encourage me to eat. Heath was such a big man that it didn’t matter what my size was, he would always be the bigger one of the two of us. Gave me some wiggle room. “I asked Anna to talk to Damien, but she said no.” I didn’t want to mention my brother to him, but he was on my mind a lot, and I felt uncomfortable hiding it from Heath. We were honest with each other, speaking our minds. “She said she didn’t want to get in the middle of it.”
He didn’t show his annoyance at my statement. “It’s too soon anyway, baby. Just leave it alone.”
“Yeah, but Anna has a tight hold on him. If anyone could talk to him, it would be her.”
“Still too soon. Time and distance are what we need right now.”
“I guess I could ask her again some other time…”
“Baby, I told you I would fix it. Let me take care of it.” He lifted his chin and looked at me instead of his food.
When he gave me that expression, I knew to back off. “Alright.”
He went back to eating, either looking at his food or out the window behind me, quiet. His elbows were on the table, his broad shoulders blocking most of the view behind him. His cut arms showed the distinctions between his different muscles, something even his ink couldn’t hide.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Anything,” he blurted out, choosing to be transparent. He’d lied to me before, but he seemed intent on proving he would never do it again.
“You said you were open to getting married…but not having children.”
He finished chewing his bite but didn’t take another. He set his fork down and looked at me boldly, not avoiding my gaze at the difficult subject.
“Do you still feel that way?” I pulled the glass of wine closer to me, my fingers resting on the rim.
He didn’t say anything.
“I know this is the beginning. We’ve barely had time to be together. But I won’t waste my time and go through this unless I know you’re willing. Because I have to have children. Nonnegotiable.” He didn’t seem like the fatherly type, with his profession and his sleeves of tattoos. He didn’t seem like the kind of man that would drop them off at school in the morning then take them to soccer practice. But I would love to have a son in his likeness, with those blue eyes and light brown hair.
He was still quiet.
Not a good sign.
“I’m not sure if I’d be a good father.” He held my gaze as he spoke, not directly answering the question, but at least responding to it.
“Because of what you do?”
“Among other reasons…”
“What other reasons?”
“I’m impatient. I’m authoritative. I’m selfish.”
“Authoritative is a good skill to have when raising kids. The other two, we’re all like that. Everyone has their reservations about being a parent. Hades didn’t seem like the father type to me, but he’s an amazing dad.”
“What makes an amazing dad?”
“Loving your kids. It’s that simple.”
“Well, I love you… So I’d imagine love wouldn’t be an issue.” He grabbed his fork again and continued to eat.
“Are you going to answer my question or just continue to ignore it?” I asked bluntly.
He smiled slightly, aroused by my bossiness rather than irritated. “You’re right, that’s a long way away. I’m not in that place right now. But if that’s a requirement to be with you and we made it that far…yes.”
That was the answer I’d been hoping for.
“I didn’t think Balto would ever be a father, and his son isn’t even here yet and I can tell he’s going to be great at it.”
“If you can run an underground world of thieves and criminals, being a father should be a simple task in comparison.”
“I can leave the Underground whenever I want. But I’d never stop being a father. I’d be a father until the day I die.”
Five
Heath
I took the elevator to the top floor then stepped inside.
Balto was on the couch, shirtless, wearing a hooded expression as he regarded me. “What’s that?” He glanced at the flowers in my hand.
“They aren’t for you.” I held up the grocery bag in my hand. “And neither is this.”
“So, you’re bringing flowers to my wife?” He rose to his feet. “Get your own woman flowers.”
Cassini came out of the kitchen, wearing jeans and a loose black top to hid
e her stomach. “Wow, they’re beautiful.” She took the lilies from my hand and smelled them. “That was thoughtful of you. Thank you.” She looked down at my bag. “And there’s more?”
I held up the bag and opened it. “Ice cream, cookies, brownies…since Balto runs this place like a prison.”
She chuckled. “Thank you, Heath. That was very thoughtful.” She took the bag into the kitchen then placed the flowers in a vase filled with water. She set it on the dining table, so they could feel the sun in the morning.
“Just wanted to see how you were doing.” I felt guilty for everything, even though it had all turned out alright. I’d taken something from Balto that wasn’t mine…and it was wrong.
“I’m fine,” she said. “The pain stopped, and everything returned to normal.” She placed her hand over her stomach as she came back to me. “And having my husband back is nice, even though he’s been a little moody.”
Balto stood there, quietly hostile.
I knew that hostility was directed at me. “He’s always been that way, so that’s nothing new.”
She smiled then looked at her husband. “Aren’t you going to say anything?”
“Don’t need to,” he answered. “My brother already knows exactly what I want to say.”
“Yeah,” I said, placing my fingers against my temple like I was reading his mind. “Lots of f-bombs and liberal use of the word asshole.” I dropped my fingers, trying to lighten the mood with a joke.
Cassini continued to watch her husband. “Balto, let it go.” She placed her palm against his shoulder and gave him a gentle squeeze. “You had to be there for your brother, and then he was there for me.”
“I don’t need another man to be there for my wife. I can do that by my damn self.” He turned away and headed back to the living room.
That stung. “I think he’s just jealous that I didn’t bring him flowers.”
He halted but didn’t turn around. Then he kept walking again.
Cassini lowered her voice so he wouldn’t hear. “He’ll get over it. Don’t worry about him.” She moved into me and kissed me on the cheek. She squeezed my hand before she turned to the kitchen to continue preparing lunch.
Balto sat on the couch, staring at the TV and ignoring me.
I walked over to him. “I got some chocolate ice cream bars.”
He stared at the screen, his hands together as his elbows rested on his knees.
I hated it when my brother was mad at me—especially when I deserved it. I moved to the armchair across from him.
He still ignored me.
“It won’t happen again, alright?”
“Doesn’t matter if it won’t happen again.” He turned back to me. “It already happened. You took my wife to the hospital when it should have been me. I’m the fucking father. I’m the fucking husband.”
I bowed my head in shame.
“If you’re lucky enough to have a wife and a kid someday, you’ll understand how shitty that feels—when your wife needs you and you aren’t there. You took that away from me. For what? So I could collect money you don’t even need?”
Cassini came back out of the kitchen, probably hearing every word because Balto spoke so loudly. “Balto.” She raised her voice, her hands on her hips, her attitude in full force. “We can’t change the past, so just drop it. It wasn’t like Heath took a vacation and asked you to fill in. He was really hurt—might have died.”
Now Balto bowed his head.
“Our son is fine, Balto. Forgive your brother.” She turned away and headed back into the kitchen.
He was quiet.
I lifted my head and stared at him for a while. “You have no idea how terrible I feel…”
“You don’t feel worse than I do,” he whispered. “Now my first memory as a father will always be that…”
“But your first memory won’t matter compared to all the other memories you’ll make, Balto. The first real memory is the day he’s born—and you’ll be there for that. I’ll be there too because I’m not going to miss it for anything.”
He took a quiet breath, like he was beginning to calm down.
“I understand you’re angry, but I am sorry.”
He finally looked at me, less hostile. “I thought I was okay with it, but then it hit me later.”
“I get it.”
He rubbed his palms together. “My life is different now. I don’t expect you to understand.”
“I do understand,” I said quietly. “And if I didn’t, I understood when I took Cassini to the hospital. I was scared for her because I love her, would die for her, and I love your son because he’s my nephew.”
He calmed down further.
“So…are we good?”
“Yes,” he said. “But not because of the bribe you just brought.”
It was a relief to hear him make a joke. “I don’t know…you should try those cookies.”
“I’m not going to have a dad bod, so no.” He looked at the TV. “How’s the office?”
I shrugged. “Nothing new.”
“No one asked about your scars?”
“I don’t work naked, so no.”
He rolled his eyes at my comeback. “And Catalina?”
“She’s going to stay with me, but I’ve got to work it out with Damien.”
He chuckled. “Good luck with that. The guy almost killed you. That’s real hate right there.”
“Well, I love her, so I’m going to figure it out.”
He shook his head slightly. “I think that’s hopeless, but I wish you the best.”
I had to figure it out if I wanted to keep Catalina, so I would find a way to break his shell…somehow.
“I’d just pay Bones to kill him, if I were you. She’ll never know.”
“But she’ll lose her brother—which will leave her miserable.”
“She’ll get over it,” he said simply.
“Well, I’d never get over losing you, so I doubt it.”
He turned back to me, his eyes slightly soft.
“She asked me about having kids last night.”
“Yeah?” Now our previous conversation seemed like ancient history. “What did you say?”
“I told her I would do it…someday.”
“Did you mean it?” he asked.
“I was honest. Told her I wasn’t interested in that right this second, but if it was important to her, I would get on board. My answer may just have been no altogether, but seeing you do it makes me realize I could do it.”
“Well, I haven’t actually done it yet.”
“But you’re excited about it. You’re prepared. I never would have pictured that before you met Cassini.”
He shrugged. “When you love a woman, shit changes.”
“Yeah. I can see that.”
“I mean, I’ll never bring her flowers because that’s pussy shit, but I’m there for her in other ways.”
“She seemed to like them, so maybe you should give it a try.”
He gave me a cold stare.
“Just saying…”
“Don’t tell me how to be a husband when you barely know how to be a boyfriend.”
“Boyfriend?” I asked. “I’m not a fucking boyfriend.”
“Then what are you?”
“I’m her fucking man,” I snapped. “I fuck her like a man, and no one else does. That’s what I am.”
He chuckled slightly when he got a rise out of me. “Yeah, you’re definitely in love with this woman. Too bad her brother is standing in the way. Too bad you didn’t meet her sooner, so a lot of this could have been avoided.”
“Yeah. Fate isn’t on my side.”
Cassini came into the living room. “Want to stay for lunch, Heath?”
I looked at Balto, asking for his permission. “Depends.”
Balto shook his head slightly before he caved. “Yeah. You can join us.”
I walked up to her door.
Last time I was here, I stood on the doorstep, listening
to the TV in the background. I left the flowers and walked away, because I’d had no right to enter her apartment anymore. I should have returned her key, but I didn’t want to do that because it felt too harsh, too final.
So, I put the key in the lock and opened it.
I stepped inside because I could, because I had every right to come and go as I pleased. It was an out-of-body experience, like living a dream, because her absence was still so potent in my mind.
She was on the couch watching TV, and she immediately sat up to look at me, dressed in her little shorts. She walked over to me, looking at the sunflowers in my hand that I’d brought for her, the ones I grew just for her. She stared at them awhile, her emotion so subtle, almost unnoticeable.
She lifted her gaze to look into mine for a few seconds before she took them, placed them against her nose to smell them, and she closed her eyes as she inhaled the forgotten scent of summer. Wordlessly, she grabbed a vase from underneath the sink and filled it with water before setting it on the kitchen island. Then she arranged them, making them good enough to sit in the window at a flower shop.
I watched her, feeling my heart grow for her every time I looked at her.
She walked around the kitchen island and came up to me, that look in her eyes the one I loved to see, like she wanted me with her mind, body, and soul. Her hands pressed into my chest as she stepped into me, her lips crashing hard to mine, like she wanted me then and there, didn’t want to waste a second by speaking.
My arms held her close, pulling her petite frame tight to my chest, kissing her with the same urgency, our mouths breaking apart and joining again, a sexy exchange of tongues and breaths. My hand moved into her hair, and I told her I loved her without actually saying it.
She tugged on my shirt then yanked it over my head, barely pausing our kiss because just a few seconds without me was too long. She hopped up on the counter so we could be eye level, so she could undo my jeans and push them off.
“Fuck, baby.” My hand dug into her hair, and I kissed her hard, lost in the combustible chemistry that lit us up like a display of fireworks. I couldn’t get enough of her, couldn’t get my boxers off quick enough, could get her shorts off fast enough so I could be inside her, where I belonged.
