She wasn’t sure where she was going, but all she knew wasit couldn’t be where he was. If she stayed there any longer, more hurtful words would be said and lines would be crossed. Their fight would take focus off what really mattered. Saying goodbye to Tomas. She couldn’t do that to Ana.
So, off she went to find a spot to hide out until the send-off was over
Chapter 14
It didn’t feel like four days had passed, nor did it feel like a full week since she’d been home. Four nights ago, Ember had seen a crew, no, a family, say goodbye to one of their own. From her hiding spot she could see the way Ari held her sister while she grieved for a lost love. She heard their favorite memories of him, some funny stories he was included in, and just a perfect summary of the kind of person he was.
Ember wished she could have said how he was a nice man or that he was kind, but she would have been lying. She didn’t spend enough time with him to form an opinion. He died a hero in her eyes though. She could at least say that.
Since that night, Ember stayed out of the crew’s way. She felt like she was intruding on their mourning period. After her argument with Nikolas she knew it would only make things worse if she pushed herself on them.
While no one said anything to her, she could see how the loss of Tomas affected the way the crew handled their daily tasks of keeping the ship afloat. Someone else had to fill the void he’d left in his passing. She wanted to offer herself up for the spot, but she felt like they wouldn’t take kindly to that. While her heart would be in the right place, she knew they’d reject her offer.
She was an outsider to their close knitted family. Because of her, one of their brothers was gone and Ana had lost someone she loved. That wasn’t an offence easily forgiven. No matter what Nikolas said, she knew she would hold onto this guilt for the rest of her life.
Night had fallen a few hours ago and Ember found herself up on deck watching the night sky. She’d never seen so many stars sparkling above her before. Even from her window she could never see this many stars. It felt like an entirely different world up there. It just cemented the fact her life would never go back to how it was before. She was never going to be that girl hidden away from the world as she watched the night sky from her window in the palace.
The world was so much larger and more beautiful than she could have ever dreamed. She couldn’t imagine ever going back to just having that fraction of a view from her window.
“I’m sure this is a different sight than you’re used to seeing at the palace.” A voice said out as Nikolas joined her.
Her gaze flickered to her right to see Nikolas leaning against the side of the ship, his stance mimicking how she stood. His head lifted as he watched the sky, a hint of an actual smile on his face as he took in the beauty of it. It didn’t go unnoticed by her that she’d yet to see him actually smile before this moment. It was always a smirk or a grin, but this was a smile.
She had to admit, it looked nice.
“I was talking about the stars. Not how beautiful my face looks.” He chuckled, his eyes flickering to her as if he could read the thoughts going through her mind on her face.
The mischief had returned to his eyes, his taunting grin appearing along with it. Given how their last conversation went she'd take the taunting grin over his harsh words.
Well, so much for having an actual nice moment with him.
Rolling her eyes, she huffed as she returned her attention to the stars. “You’re insufferable, do you know that?”
“A bastard too, I’ve been told.” He chuckled, using this as his opening to bring up their fight from the other night.
She wasn’t sure how to respond. So, she didn’t.
He didn’t seem upset over what she’d said to him. Comments like that seemed to roll right off his back, and she wouldn’t admit it to him, but she actually admired that quality. Rumors and snide comments were not uncommon back at the palace and being that she was the apple of the Prince’s eye, she knew a lot of them were directed toward her. She’d been so worried about those rumors the night of the ruined engagement party and now it seemed so silly. There were so many worse things
happening in this world than people talking gossip behind her back.
Twisting around, she leaned her back against the wood and let her gaze settle on the ship. Her eyes immediately found the door she knew led to the lower decks. She had yet to venture down there for more than a few minutes to search for food. Even when she did, she never dared to go near the steps that would bring her to the cells. She couldn’t face Asher, who she now knew dwelled down there.
A question had been burning in her throat for days now. She’d hadn’t yet had the courage to ask Nikolas, or anyone else for that matter, if she could even slip down to the cells to talk with her friend. She wasn’t sure she was ready to ask the questions she should have the second she knew he was here. Cassius’ condition or if her father was the one to send Asher and the guards to retrieve her. She wasn’t sure if she knew how to prepare herself for the answers that she’d receive from him.
She could feel the Captain’s curious eyes on her. His gaze felt like it was burning into her skin and she resisted the urge to squirm underneath it. It was clear he was waiting for her to ask her questions. He clearly had an answer ready for her most important one. He was just waiting to see if she truly was ready to know.
Was she?
Her head said yes, her heart said no.
“Has he told you anything?” Her voice was as quiet as a mouse, but he’d heard what she’d asked.
He studied her for a long moment. Maybe it was to wonder if she really wanted to know, or if she was asking because she felt she needed to. After what seemed like years later, he finally deemed it safe to give her an answer. “Ari was able to find out from Blu what we needed to break the curse. The bastard is one of the key ingredients, I’m afraid. So, your dear friend gets to breathe another day. That’s the good news.” He said, pausing as he spared her a glance.
Her heart skipped a beat, but she wasn’t sure if it was in relief or worry of what else they could possibly need. “What’s the bad news?”
He turned his body around, mimicking her stance again. He leaned back on his elbows, his eyes raising to watch the stars above them. After a quiet moment, he sighed and turned his attention to her. “We need a witch, and that unfortunately means I know our next heading.” He said with a grimace on his handsome face.
From the expression playing across his features, she was debating if she really wanted to know. If he wasn’t a fan of wherever this place was, it had to be bad.
“Where are we going?” She still asked.
His gaze turned to the sea, his eyes narrowing. “The lunar city. Stellara.”
Stellara was told to be a beautiful city. On the night of the lunar eclipse, they celebrated by turning out all the lights in the city and watching as the moon turned completely black and the stars shot across the sky. It happened twice a year, and it was their biggest celebration. She used to beg her father to take her to see it, but he always said it was too dangerous of a trip.
“Is it the journey there that bothers you?”
His face scrunched up, his head shaking as he waved it off. “Hardly. The route there will be fine. It’s their Queen who is not particularly fond of me. Well, her and the King, if we’re being specific about it.”
Her brow raised as her interest was piqued. “I can only assume you did something dastardly to this King and Queen then.”
The sound of his chuckle sent her stomach a flutter. She lowered her head in an attempt to hide her blush. As if he wanted to prolong this torture, he reached over and brushed back a lock of her hair. His thumb lingered as it stroked her cheek. “That would be a safe assumption, pretty girl. The starlight looks good on you.”
He was changing the subject, she realized. She could call him on it, but she decided against it. “Are you saying I look better when there’s no light?” She laughed, a strange noi
se she hadn’t heard from herself in a long while.
“Not intentionally, no. You’re beautiful, no matter what the lighting is.” He chuckled as his eyes betrayed him as they gave her a once over.
He was a shameless flirt, a pirate with a reputation for charming women and leaving them suddenly naked of their jewelry. His words didn’t hold much weight and she knew better than to fall for his nice words and pretty smile.
Yet, she didn’t call him on it and leave him there as she walked away. She found she didn’t want to. It was a nice distraction to everything else going on. “I’m afraid that line won’t work on me, Captain Nikolas.” She said, turning her nose up. Her smile gave away her attempt at teasing.
Something flashed across his face too quickly for her to decipher. Was it guilt? Not quite. Sadness, maybe? She couldn’t be sure. What she was certain of, was he wasn’t telling her something. Given they were still basically strangers, she’d let him have his secret until he was ready to tell her.
She angled her body to face him, her head tilting to the side as she raised her gaze to meet his. “You mentioned you were learning things about me. What have you learned so far, Captain?” She asked, her eyes flickering to his lips before returning to his gaze.
A silent challenge was given between the two.
He seemed to think about it for a long moment. His eyes studied her as if he was trying to come up with something clever to say. She wondered briefly if he had actually learned anything or if he’d been lying to her.
His lingering gaze returned to her face, mischief crashing like waves behind his eyes as his grin spread across his face. “I’ll only tell you if we can make a game out of it. A theory for a theory, that is.”
On the night of the party during her first dance with him it was the way he read her like an open book that frightened her. The way he spoke that night, it made her wonder if maybe that wasn’t the first time that he had seen her. Perhaps, he had been watching her than just that day. If what he’d said later on, how she was always the job he had been sent to fulfill that night meant he’d actually had his eye on her for a while.
Seeing how her curse was tied to his brothers, she wouldn’t be too surprised if she was hitting the mark perfectly.
Still, she found the idea of revealing something she had learned about him exciting.
“That would imply I’ve been watching you. Which I haven’t.” She said, her eyes challenging to him to call her bluff.
He met her challenge with a taunting smirk. “I know you have. Come on, Lady Emberlyn. I dare you to play.”
She could feel the blush burning her cheeks, but ignored it as she met his challenge with a nod. “Alright, but you go first. Age before beauty and all that, after all.”
His chuckle sent butterflies fluttering around her stomach again. “Fair enough. Alright, let’s see. I don't believe you’ve ever been outside your little town before. You get this look of wonder when you see something as simple as the stars in the night sky. I think you’ve got a curious heart. You want to know the whys and how's of everything.” He said, his voice low and soft as he tried to find the right words.
If she didn’t think she was blush already, she knew she would be now.
Reaching up, she pushed a fallen curl from his eyes. “You hide behind a mask. I know you care for your crew like they’re your family. That’s why you got so angry with me. You were mourning a brother. You love them, even if you pretend that you’re this handsomely tough cocky pirate captain who doesn’t care about anyone.”
A chuckle rumbled in his chest, but she could tell she’d caught him off guard with her theory. “So, you do think I’m handsome then?”
He was deflecting, but she let him get away with it this time.
“You’re impossible.” She said with an eye roll.
As he leaned closer, she tried to ignore the smell she recognized as purely being him. The smell of the ocean invaded her sense, along with a hint of rum he’d been drinking and something else she had yet to be able to put a name to. She was going to make it her mission sometime soon to do that.
“Being out here with me, going on this adventure? I think it excites you. You love being out here on the sea, being free to do as you wish, with who you wish to do it with.”
It might have been his scent making her feel weak in the knees, or how true his words rang true. She wasn’t sure she wanted to know. All she knew was he was standing too close and the idea of pressing her lips against his seemed like a delicious idea.
He moved his hand to the other side of her body, caging her in between his arms. As his chest trapped her in between him and the ship, she found herself craving to be closer. The excitement of being in a scandalizing position with the pirate captain was clouding her judgement, but at the moment she found she didn’t care.
As his head dipped, ready to capture her lips with his own, her hand pressed against his chest. He paused, his lips hovering over her mouth as he waited for her permission to close the space between them.
“I believe you’re a good man, Nikolas. I believe you wouldn’t put me in a position to choose between a life with you at sea over the safety of my kingdom. I believe…. I believe even if you pretend you don’t, you have a good heart and don’t want to see me hurt.” She said, her eyes flickering down as her hand moved up around his neck.
It was a test. She could see the desire he had to fail it, but she knew he wouldn’t.
His hand curled around her waist as if he actually considered proving her wrong, but with a heavy sigh he dropped his head on her shoulder.
Biting her lip, she watched him for another moment until his fingers released the fabric of her shirt. “I don’t know if I’m more disappointed or relieved to be right.” Her voice was a whisper in his ear, her hand rubbing his chest before she slipped free from his hold.
“I’m wondering that very question myself.” He muttered.
As she headed back to the sleeping quarters she shared with Ana and Ari, she paused at the doorway when she heard her name. The only sign she’d given him to say she was listening was the turn of her head.
“You haven’t asked to see him yet.” He pointed out.
She knew exactly which him he was referring to and she knew it had to be strange to him that she hadn’t. If she was being honest it was a mystery to her as well. She should have ordered them to take her to Asher the second she realized Nikolas had brought him back to the ship to interrogate him. She should have wanted to see him, but something in the pit of her stomach was stopping her.
“I know I haven’t.” Was all she replied.
Silence fell over them, the moment lingering just long enough she assumed that was the end of the conversation.
Just as she went to continue on to her temporary sleeping arrangements, he decided to speak again. “You can, if you want to. No one would stop you.”
The surprise that hit her caused her to turn around finally. Nikolas stood a few yards away from her, but she could still see the nervousness on his face as he rubbed the back of his neck.
She found herself speechless. Well, almost speechless.
“Thank you.”
She said nothing else as she turned and went to spend the next few hours tossing and turning as she tried to make sense of his offer.
Chapter 15
Two days had passed before Ember had enough courage to stand before the staircase leading down into the cells where she knew Asher was being held. They’d be docking at Stellara in just another day. It was now or never. She knew she wouldn’t have the courage to do this again if she didn’t do it now. Her fingers shook as she raised her hand to press it against the side of the ship as she descended the stairs.
Her memories of her own time down here did not escape her.
The smell had not change since then, she noted as the rotting wood scent invaded her senses. Holding back a gag at the familiar smell of mold and other things she did not want to know of, she pushed herself to keep moving for
ward.
How had it only been a week since she’d been down here? A week since she was in her ruined red dress that had been then covered in grime and dirt with her hair looking more like a rat’s nest. She had looked every bit the beast Ari had named her.
Her eyes quickly took in her current appearance. The comfortable new pants she now wore were a blessing along with an oversized marooned colored shirt where the sleeves fell off her shoulders and flowed out past her hands. Around her waist she wore one of the corset belts she’d seen the twins always wearing. It wasn’t nearly as constricting as an actual corset she was used to wearing, but it showed off the curves she wasn’t ever aware she’d had.
She’d never be caught dead looking like this in the palace, no matter how much more
comfortable it was than her unbreathable dresses. She looked like…. for the lack of a better word, a pirate.
It didn’t occur to her that this outfit was probably not her best choice when going to see the man she was hoping to show and convince that she hadn’t changed.
Her flame colored hair was tied up with a ribbon with only a single curled lock falling on either side of her face to frame it. She was so used to restricting it inside of a braid to keep her natural curls contained. She wasn’t used to being able to breathe or feel the wind in her hair. Everything always had to be controlled Queen Kailani had once explained. Her hair, her expressions, her clothing, everything. She found she much preferred this look and she wasn’t looking forward to returning to her constricting corsets and tight braids any time soon.
She hoped her old friend recognized her and didn’t hate her for wanting that.
As she reached the bottom of the stairs, she let her eyes scan the mostly empty cells until she paused on the one that wasn’t. Her heart broke at the sight that welcomed her. Asher was sitting on the bench that was meant to be his bed, his head in his hands as he stared at the puddle of water at his feet. He wasn’t the clean-shaven well-dressed boy she was used to.
The Black Moon's Curse (The Stellara Trilogy Book 1) Page 13
