Let’s Start Over

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Let’s Start Over Page 12

by Laurent, River


  Cooper’s name glared at me from the top of the message. I ran my finger over it and it took every ounce of willpower within me to keep from begging him to come over. As long as I had been home, Brian hadn’t popped up. He wasn’t at my door or down below, he hadn’t tried to barge in. Maybe, just maybe, it wasn’t him. Maybe some teenager thought the note was a good joke and a way to freak someone out.

  Safe & Sound. Thank u 4 asking.

  I debated about putting an x and then finally decided not to. After what happened tonight, I had to be careful that I didn’t behave like a tease. Then I closed the message and walked into the bathroom. I determined that I would not be afraid of what I couldn’t see.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Ivy

  I tried to make myself sleep, but it was harder than I realized. I was up again in an hour. I fixed myself a hot chocolate and prayed it would soothe me enough for me to sleep. All I needed was some sleep, pure, blessed release from having to think about Brian and the problems he would undoubtedly cause. I wasn’t going to be afraid of him was what I told myself, but the reality was that his smiling face while he’d strangled me kept coming up like bile until I shivered with unease and fear.

  When my head hit the pillow, I didn’t stay asleep for long either.

  Instead, I popped up alert and every nerve on fire as if Brian was staring down at me while I slept. When that didn’t happen, I tried to knock myself out by drinking half a glass of vodka. I was sure I would wake up with a hangover, but it hurt more to think and dream about Brian choking me to death.

  After my big drink, I curled up against my pillow and turned the TV on, but kept it on mute, just in case there were footsteps or any noise that might alert me to an intruder. The vodka and the soundless images soothed me until I eventually, relaxed and dozed off once again.

  I slept until I heard something and jumped out of my sleep.

  The room felt cold, freezing even. I wondered if I had left the AC on once again. More often than not, I fell asleep with the thing running and froze myself to death by morning. I kicked my legs over the side and slipped out of bed. My feet shifted against the carpet as I left my bedroom and walked out into the living room. Before I could get to the thermostat, a figure shifted on the couch. I froze.

  He had already laid eyes on me and he narrowed them. “There you are,” he growled. “Come here right now. Where the hell have you been? Who the fuck do you think you are?”

  I backed away from him and ran into the wall behind me. My ability to speak had stopped working.

  Brian stood up and adjusted the jacket that he wore. He lurched forward and my heart rate skyrocket. I wanted to turn and scramble back into my room, but my feet wouldn’t cooperate. My chest rose and fell faster as his grin widened and stretched across his face like a grotesque mask.

  I finally forced myself to move just as his hands slammed into the wall where I had been. I fell through my bedroom door and kicked it shut with my foot. Shaking, I threw the lock and screamed when he slammed against it.

  “You can’t get rid of me, you fat bitch!” he growled. “I’m watching you! I know where you are and who you’re talking to, you slut! If I can’t have you, no one can have you. Do you hear me? You’re nothing without me and I’ll make sure you know it you bitch!”

  I wrapped my arms around my legs and buried my face between my knees. Sooner or later, he would burst through the door and I’d be dead. I tried to block out his rabid words, but they flowed into my ears anyway. The door bowed out under the force of his fists and I knew it was over. He was going to get me. It was worse than The Shining when Jack Nicholson went crazy and tried to kill his family.

  Then the door cracked and Brian appeared in front of me. He grinned as he lurched for me.

  I screamed at the top of my lungs…

  The sound of my own screaming jolted me out of my sleep. I was gasping for breath and covered in sweat. Cold tingles slid down my spine and I shuddered as my eyes flashed around the room fast. My hand reached for the lamp. I switched it on and winched as bright pain hit my eyes. Squinting, I threw my gaze into every corner until I was positive Brian wasn’t in my room and it was all just a horrible nightmare.

  My chest rose and fell as my heart pounded even after I knew it was only a dream. The adrenaline was taking its time to wear off and there seemed to be nothing I could do about it. I closed my eyes and focused on my breathing. Bit by bit, the fear dissipated, and I was left a shaky, sweaty mess in my bed.

  I reached over to the nightstand and yanked up my phone. It was six in the morning. I’d slept only for a while, but the nightmare was apparently enough to shake me out of my deep sleep. I knew I had to work in a few hours, but I wasn’t feeling it. I needed to get myself together.

  My thumb scrolled over Cooper’s name and stayed there for a minute. He had wished me a goodnight.

  I sent him a quick text letting him know that I was not feeling very well and was going to stay home for the day. I let him know it wasn’t serious and he didn't have to worry about me. I would be back tomorrow. For now, I just needed some time to myself.

  I realized that Brian had got what he wanted. He had frightened me so much I just wanted to stay home. At that moment, I felt as if I never wanted to open my front door and go outside again. Why would I want to leave when I could stay safe and sound locked into my room?

  Brian could be outside, waiting just around the corner to finish the job he had started in New York. Even now, I could still feel his hands squeezing my throat as life went out of me. I shuddered at the phantom sensation.

  I laid the phone on the nightstand and scrunched down underneath my blanket. Fuck going outside. I didn’t feel safe being exposed and out in the open.

  My phone buzzed, and the noise made me jump. I gripped my pillow instinctively even though I knew it had to be just Cooper telling me to rest or letting me know he received my text. That could wait. I was too on edge to answer anyone. I would answer him when I wasn’t dizzy and out of it and trembling after such a horrible nightmare.

  Eventually, the buzzing ceased. I didn’t want to go back to sleep, but it was better than being awake and wondering every second if Brian would burst through my door and hurt me. My eyelids grew heavy and before I knew it, my body had started to settle down as it dragged me back down for another nap.

  By the time I woke up again, I still felt groggy and out of it. I reached for my phone, and saw dozens of texts and I knew I’d have to actually call, so I might as well get it over with. With a groan, I hit Cooper’s name.

  His phone was answered before the second ring, “Where the hell are you?” he growled.

  I blinked. “I sent you a text to tell you I wasn’t feeling very well. Didn’t you get it?”

  “Yeah,” he huffed. “I got it, but it seems like bullshit. You were perfectly fine yesterday.”

  “I can’t help that my body suddenly decided not to feel good, Cooper. Come on. I need the day off so I can heal up and then come back to work fully upbeat and ready to go. If I have to sniffle over drinks and people think I’m going to infect them, it won’t be a great day anyway.”

  Cooper sighed. “Why do I feel like you’re hiding shit from me?”

  Maybe because I’m definitely hiding shit from you. Of course, I couldn’t tell him that, but it was true. I didn’t want him to know about Brian, or the note. All he would do was worry over me, but what if he got caught up in something that didn’t even involve him? I’d never forgive myself if he got hurt or sent away because of me.

  “It’s not,” I said as I pretended to cough. “I was fine until last night, then it hit me. I guess it’s been creeping on for a few days. I’m really okay, though. I have soup and juice and if I need anything else I’ll—I’ll get it delivered.”

  “Hmm,” Cooper said. “I’ll be over in a little bit.”

  I jumped up. “Cooper, I told you I’ll be okay. You have to work.”

  “It’s a weekday, the bar will be fi
ne. I’ll see you in half an hour.”

  I growled. “You don’t listen even a little bit, do you? I’m fine. I don’t need your help. Stay at work.”

  “Half an hour. So get dressed.”

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Ivy

  I started to tell him to stop, but he had already killed the call. I stared at my phone in astonishment for a few seconds before I began to curse and swear. Hardheaded, dominating bastard. I should have known he wasn’t going to back off.

  I forced myself onto my wobbly legs and trudged into the kitchen. I clicked on the coffee pot before I went into the bathroom and cleaned myself up a bit. One shower later, my hair was no longer sticking to sweat-slicked skin. My cheeks were rosy again and my teeth were clean. It helped me feel a little more alive than when I had first jolted from my nightmare.

  The coffee pot was ready to go and I poured myself a cup. I left the cream and sugar behind in favor of the strong, bitter liquid. It just might give me a boost.

  Knock, knock, knock.

  I jumped and almost spilled boiling liquid on me. My heart raced. It was Cooper. What if it was Brian though? I gripped my mug so tightly, I was sure it would break in my hands.

  “Jo? Open the door, it’s Cooper.”

  The fear left me. It was just Cooper. I quickly stalked into the other room and peered through the peephole just to be sure. When I saw him, I unlocked the door, shoved the boxes out of the way, and yanked the door open.

  Cooper pushed inside and slammed the door after him before he looked around. “Why are there giant boxes behind your door?”

  “Oh, I was—uh, looking for something,” I said as I turned away to pick up my mug and take a sip from it.

  Cooper looked as if he didn’t believe a word that I was saying.

  I stopped while panicking internally. Just having him here was enough to soothe me, but I wanted every single precaution that I could take.

  He nodded toward me. “You look like a wreck. What’s going on? And don’t lie about it because I can see the redness around your eyes. You’ve been crying.”

  I couldn’t deny that, not when it was so visible. I shrugged my shoulders and walked over to the couch.

  He followed.

  When I reached the table, I picked up the note and gave it to Cooper so he could see it for himself.

  He read it before he frowned. “What the hell is this?” he asked before he looked up at me. “Who fucking sent this?”

  “Brian, I think,” I whispered and clutched my mug needing the burning heat to keep me grounded. “I can’t think of anyone else that would want to scare me. I mean unless it’s some asshole kids just screwing around with me, but I don’t think that’s it at all. I think it’s him.”

  “What the hell?” he muttered as he examined the note. Cooper turned it over and stared at the words before he finally shook his head. “We have to go to the police with this.”

  I waved a hand. “What good would that do? No one would ever believe me. Besides, I have no proof that it was Brian who did it.”

  “That’s not the point. At least if you tell the police everything you’ve been through, maybe they can start to work up a restraining order, or at least you’ll have a trail of evidence about what he’s done and said to you. This could turn ugly really fast, Jo. I don’t want to see you in danger.”

  I chewed my lip. Could he be right about that? I was worried they would laugh at me, but I did need to protect myself. Brian was unhinged and he had been for some time. If there was even the slightest chance that he’d found me in Springston, then I wanted to take every precaution I could find. “Maybe you’re right.”

  “I am right. Where was this?” he asked, jerking the note in his hand. “When did you find it?”

  I shrugged. “I felt weird last night when I was walking home, like someone was watching me. I thought it was just my imagination playing tricks on me since it was dark and quiet out, but the feeling stayed the whole time. And then I found this on the floor. Someone had pushed it underneath my door.”

  “He got into the building?”

  I nodded.

  “It can’t be anyone but Brian, can it?” Cooper breathed.

  “It could be one of your crazy, stalker, wannabe girlfriends,” I pointed out. “Some people aren’t exactly happy that I’ve moved back and most of them seem to be people you’ve dated.”

  Cooper looked at me as if I was crazy. “No one I know would go this far, Jo. You can’t be in denial about this forever. If he’s here and I have a bad feeling he is, we need to make sure you’re going to be safe.”

  I frowned. “I don’t want you to get wrapped up in my drama, Cooper. You have your life.”

  “You are my life. I’m not going to let anything happen to you. Go and get dressed so we can go to the police station.”

  I stared at him. “You’re not going to give me a choice in the matter, are you?”

  “Glad you recognize that, so we don’t have to waste time arguing about it. I’ll make myself a cup of coffee and wait for you out here.”

  I sighed, but gave up on arguing with him. Instead, I walked into my room and made sure that my curtains were pulled tightly. Once I was positive no one would be able to see me, I stripped off the robe then changed into a pair of jeans and a dark t-shirt. I tugged on my sneakers before I pulled my hair up into a bun and headed back out.

  Cooper was right where he said he would be. He sat perched on one of the stools in the kitchen drinking from one of my mugs. For a minute, my heart did flip-flops in my chest. How could anyone be so effortlessly beautiful? Cooper was more than gorgeous, he was kind, protective and… more important than any of that, he cared about me.

  He glanced up at me. “Ready to go?”

  “Yeah,” I said, shuffling from one foot to the other. “Before we go, I just wanted to say I’m sorry for the way I acted last night. You’ve come through for me so many times since I’ve been back and it was unfair of me to be so unkind. Thank you.”

  Cooper stood up and eclipsed me with his size. “You don’t have to apologize. I know what you’re going through. You can’t get rid of me so easily. I’ll always be here for you. Whatever you need, call and tell me. Don’t ever feign sickness again, or feel you have to lie to me.”

  I grinned sheepishly at the look on his face. “I told you I didn’t want you to get involved. Every movie or show I’ve ever seen shows the guy that gets in the middle gets hurt or killed. I wouldn’t know what to do if I was responsible for that. I can’t lose you, Cooper. I wouldn’t be able to take it. You’re the only one I’ve got left.”

  “I’m stronger than you think,” he said softly as he reached out and gently stroked my cheek. Then he yanked me forward and I was crushed against his hard body. “And I would rather die a hundred times than let you suffer through this by yourself. Stop thinking that you need to take on the world alone. You have me now. There’s not going to be any more talk of you putting up with this shit all on your own. Do you understand me?”

  My voice caught in my throat and I choked on the words that were trying to come out. It was impossible to form sentences or even coherent thoughts when I felt such overwhelming emotions emanating from him and my own heart. Cooper cared about me and he reminded me of a time when other people cared as well. Maybe I hadn’t had the best life in New York, but I was back home now. There were people like him, Mel, and even Cindy that cared about me and wanted me to be all right. I hadn’t felt care and concern so strongly since my parents died.

  I stayed pressed against the warmth of his chest, and Cooper didn’t move an inch. He was like a rock I was holding on to. I felt grateful for that as I buried my face against his body and let the tears pour down my cheeks. Am I ever going to be done crying? It seemed like lately that was all I did, but I couldn’t stop. Brian had tried to kill me. He hated me that much after all I did for him. There was so much emotion stuffed inside me that it all seeped up in a steady stream threatening to drown me and r
uin Cooper’s clothes.

  “Do you understand me?” Cooper repeated into my hair.

  “I u-understand,” I hiccupped.

  His big, strong hand moved down my back gently and I melted even more against him.

  “Good. That’s all I need to hear.”

  He didn’t rush me to stop crying or try to hurry me along. No, Cooper just stood there with me in his arms and waited patiently. He whispered against my ear that everything would be okay, and shushed me gently until I finally calmed down.

  “God, I feel like such a fucking baby,” I muttered, rubbing at my cheeks. “I swear, I don’t usually cry at all. I don’t think my boss or Brian had ever seen me cry even once. Not even after all they put me through.”

  Cooper shrugged. “I don’t have a problem with you crying. Cry as much as you want.”

  I sniffed. “I’m done… for now.”

  His lips quirked. “In that case, get your shoes on, and let’s get this over with.”

  I smiled mistily at him. “Can I just go wash my face first?” I felt like a freak for sobbing so much and it was nice to hear his comforting words.

  “Of course. I’ll be right here waiting for you.”

  When I came back with my face still looking swollen but with some semblance of being presentable, Cooper took my hand in his and gave it a squeeze. I knew I had to get this done. So I held my head up, sucked in a deep breath and walked on to meet it. I couldn’t let Brian turn me back into the scared, helpless person I was before.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Cooper

  I’d intended to give her some space. That was what I told myself after she freaked out in the bar the night before. Clearly, there was a lot that she needed to work out and I was going to give her that space.

  Until I heard the stress in her voice on the phone. And the hours of pep talk I had given myself was gone in a flash. I’d jumped up and decided to get to her right away and I was glad I did. I couldn’t believe the state I found her in. Just looking at the boxes she had piled in front of her door, made me shake with fury. How dare he scare her like that? She was a complete wreck.

 

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