by Glines, Abbi
I nodded my head in greeting, unsure about speaking just yet.
“Are you gonna make Rio waffles too?” Cullen asked.
Bryn yawned, covering her mouth, and, Jesus, why was that sexy! Then, she nodded her head and gave the kid a genuine smile. It was a good thing she hadn’t given me one of those. My head was too mixed up this morning to handle that. I would have forgiven her anything if she’d smiled at me like that. I was pretty damn sure I would have forgiven her even if she had set my Jeep on fire.
It was the lack of sleep. That was all this was. Sleep deprivation was making me stupid.
“If Rio wants waffles, I will happily make him some,” she told the kid, then shifted her gaze to mine only briefly before turning to get a cup from the cabinet. The T-shirt she was wearing lifted with her arms, and there was a small flash of skin just above the waist of her shorts.
Why was that so damn sexy when I had seen the woman practically naked? It was the sleep deprivation. That, and I needed to get laid. Tonight, I would fix that. It had been weeks since I’d fucked. That had to be part of this.
“I need to get going. I’ve got things to handle before going into work,” I said, wanting to get away from Bryn as quickly as possible.
I wasn’t sure how much longer my good sense would hold out. My attraction to her wasn’t something I ever intended to act on. Seeing her last night, alone, taking care of Cullen the way his mom should have been, that had done something to my head. My good sense was gone for a moment. She’d almost won me over, and then I remembered all the reasons she was bad news.
I had been wrong about one thing, and after my brief stay here, I was willing to admit it even if only to myself. Bryn was a good aunt. Hell, she was a good mom. She was the mom we never had. The kid wasn’t suffering because of her. Tory was a piece of shit, but Bryn made up for it. She sacrificed for him, and it was clear he loved her. Working at a fucking strip club wasn’t the answer, but she wasn’t my business. If that was what she wanted to do, then fine.
“Okay, uh, thank you for that and last night,” Bryn replied with a soft smile that was as genuine as I was going to get, and that was a good thing.
“No problem,” I replied. I shifted my gaze from her to the kid. “See you around,” I told him.
He didn’t smile at me this time but nodded his head. His shoulders were slumped, as if my leaving was letting him down. Damn, this wasn’t something I had been prepared for either.
“Cullen, I need a little help, washing the berries. Can you get a chair and do that for me?” Bryn asked.
Just like that, his face brightened, and he rushed over to grab a kitchen chair.
She smirked when I looked back at her and shrugged. “He’ll be fine,” she assured me.
I knew he would be. I had witnessed how fine he was with my own eyes. I started to turn for the door when I paused and looked back at her. She was watching me.
“I forgive you for bashing the Jeep,” I told her. “It’s forgotten. Whatever made you do it, I don’t care.” If nothing else, I needed to let that go.
I didn’t wait for a response before heading for the door this time. She hadn’t expected my forgiveness, and I knew she probably didn’t know how to respond. I didn’t require one. I’d just needed to get that out. Then, maybe I could put her behind me. Move on from what I had witnessed here and forget her.
“Aunt Bryn didn’t bash your Jeep,” Cullen called out, and I paused with my hand on the doorknob.
“Cullen,” Bryn said his name, but I turned back around and looked directly at her.
She looked nervous and unsure. It was as if she was battling shoving me out the door or covering Cullen’s mouth.
I shouldn’t have said it in front of the kid. I hadn’t thought before speaking. Shit. He hadn’t needed to hear something bad about the woman he trusted and loved. But how did I backtrack and fix this?
“You’re right. I got confused. I think I dreamed that.” I replied, hoping that was enough so he would forget about it.
Cullen frowned at me. It had been a poor cover-up, but he was four.
Did he have to think it over so hard? Let it go, kid.
“You didn’t dream it,” he said to me. “We found Mama with that pole, beating up a Jeep. Aunt Bryn told me to lie back in my car seat and close my eyes, but I didn’t.” He looked at his aunt and lowered his head. “I’m sorry I looked, but I was scared Mama would hurt you with that pole.”
“It’s okay,” she assured him, then reached down and ran a hand over his head. “Go on and wash the berries,” she added, but she didn’t look at me.
She shifted her gaze down at the kitchen towel she was wringing in her hands. I waited for her to elaborate. To explain why I’d found her with a pole in her hand and not Tory. Asking Cullen to say more felt wrong. He shouldn’t have known the truth or witnessed it. But him being in the backseat made sense. Where else would he have been? I knew now that there was no way Bryn would have left him home alone to come bash my Jeep. Maybe once, I would have believed that about her, but not now. I had seen too much into their life in my brief stay here.
“You gonna say anything?” I asked her when the silence continued.
She sighed and finally lifted her eyes to meet mine. “What?” she snapped.
“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe explain why you took the blame for it, lost your job,” I began and decided to leave out, Started working at a strip club . I had already said too much in front of the kid.
Bryn leveled her gaze on me, and it suddenly looked more like a glare. She was angry with me, as if I should understand. As if this were my fault.
“I did what I had to do,” she replied.
How the hell was this my fault? She had let me believe she had bashed my Jeep. I’d had every right to be pissed off about it. I should have filed charges that night. I shouldn’t have let my insurance pay for it. And she’d given two thousand dollars for it.
“You lost your job and your last paycheck. How was that the thing to do? Look at what you ended up doing because of it.” I stopped myself and glanced at the kid.
He was watching me. This wasn’t the place for this conversation. He didn’t need to hear it. But he had seen what had happened that night.
I looked back at her, and with a softer voice, I asked, “What if I had pressed charges? He needs you .”
I saw something in Bryn’s eyes before she looked back down at the towel in her hands. “Thanks for forgiving me,” she said finally but didn’t look back up at me, but at Cullen. “Let’s get those berries dried. We have waffles to make.”
Cullen handed her the fruit he had washed, and she went to work, putting them on the towel she had spread out on the counter. She wasn’t going to say any more in front of Cullen. As much as I wanted to talk about this, I didn’t press because she was right. He had heard too much already.
Without saying any more, I opened the door and left the apartment.
I didn’t walk away from the door yet. Instead, I stood there and took a deep breath to calm myself, but it didn’t work. My chest felt as if someone had a fist inside, twisting everything. Why was I reacting like this? Because I had believed a lie? Did this matter? Should it? Every-fucking-thing about Bryn Wallace was screwed up. Her entire world was full of baggage I didn’t want to deal with. Shit I had left behind a long time ago in my own life.
I studied the place, my surroundings, and made sure nothing was sketchy before making my way down to the street. I heard the bolt click into place in the door as I walked away and wondered if she had seen me still standing out here.
I wasn’t her hero, and I didn’t want her to think I was going to be. I’d do what needed to be done to make sure the kid was safe from whatever shit his mama had left behind, and then that was it.
Getting in my Jeep, I turned and headed up the main street toward my house. I needed a shower and some food, but first, I was going to get Saul and Drake. It wasn’t that I was nervous around dealers or addicts. I had
lived with one most of my life. My mother had been an addict, and dealers had come and gone in our home, wherever it was at the time.
Saul knew the area better than me because he had dealt with his mother’s addictions. He could find the people I needed to see. Drake was just another body. Numbers were always safer. The more of us, the better. I wanted this handled, and I wanted to get on with my life.
Chapter Twenty
Bryn
An hour after lunch, Cullen fell asleep on the sofa, watching television. He had wanted to go to the park today, but I had been waiting to hear from Rio that it was safe. I didn’t like having to keep Cullen inside all day, but I had no other choice.
Rio had said he was going to handle things this morning. Maybe he hadn’t planned on updating me. I was just supposed to trust he had done it. However, I had Cullen’s safety to worry about, and I needed to know for sure. I thought about calling Henley and checking to see if she had heard anything. In the end, I decided to just wait. If I didn’t hear from him by tomorrow, I would call Henley. Right now, we would stay inside, locked up safely.
I wasn’t sure what I expected now that he knew the truth about the Jeep. I hated that Cullen had heard any of that, but there was a sense of relief. No matter how I felt about Rio March, him knowing I wasn’t the kind of person who would bash in someone’s vehicle was important. He knew my background, and as stupid as it was, I wanted him to see what I had overcome. He had made it out, thanks to his grandparents. I had made it out, thanks to me. I had done it. I had survived it.
Rio had kept his distance when I arrived in town. Other than a nod and smile when he saw me at work, there was nothing else. He looked at me as someone lower than himself. It had been painful at first, but I was over that now. Or close to over it.
I knew the job I worked to give Cullen a decent life was something Rio saw as a failure. I needed to stop caring what he thought of me. It did not matter. I was never someone he had interest in since my return. I was the one with the silly attraction to a boy I’d once known, dreaming of something stupid when I’d decided to come here and find him.
A knock on the door snapped me out of my thoughts, and I glanced back at the sofa to make sure it hadn’t woken Cullen. Moving quietly, I made my way to the window to peek outside to see who it was. It wouldn’t be Rio. I had expected a call or possibly a text from Rio but gotten neither. There was no chance he was going to come by here to update me in person.
Saint’s tall form startled me, and I dropped the curtain and quickly went to open the door. My first concern was something being wrong with Marley or possibly Trix. Instead of letting Saint inside, I stepped outside so that our voices wouldn’t wake Cullen.
Without my platform heels on, I had to tilt my head back to make eye contact with Saint. The leather jacket he was wearing told me he was on his Harley. There was no other need for a jacket this time of year.
“Sorry, Cullen fell asleep on the sofa. I don’t want to wake him up,” I explained, nodding my head toward the door. “What’s wrong?” I then asked, trying to tamp down my imagination.
Saint smirked. “I miss you. That’s what’s wrong,” he replied.
Oh. I stood there, relieved that this visit wasn’t because something bad had happened. “I, uh, I think I’ve just been expecting the worst lately.”
His smirk instantly faded. “Has something else happened?”
I shook my head. Marley would have updated him on things. She had sent me a text last night, and I’d explained the situation. I knew that was part of the reason Saint was here.
Saint scanned the area with his gaze. I had no doubt he could spot a problem. It was his main job at the club. He weeded out the trouble before it became an issue.
“You shouldn’t be staying here alone,” he said, his gaze locking back on me.
I opened my mouth to say that we were fine and explain how things were being handled, but I didn’t get a word out before another voice spoke up.
“They’re not alone,” Rio said from behind me.
I spun around to face him. He had come back. My heart rate picked up, and I wanted to curse myself for feeling anything where Rio was concerned. So, he had come to tell me what had happened instead of calling. Henley had probably made him do this.
Rio wasn’t looking at me. He was glaring at Saint. Rio stepped beside me, much closer than I was used to him being. I could feel the heat from his body. If he moved an inch closer, he’d be pressed against a portion of my back.
Why was he acting possessive? Did he assume Saint was here to make me work? I had to say something, I realized.
“Rio, y-y-y-you r-remember Saint from the c-c-c-club,” I stammered, wincing at the sound of my voice.
Rio needed to back away from me. I was struggling to focus on my words. My breathing was a bit off too.
His gaze dropped from Saint to me. “Are you okay?” he asked.
“Of course,” I replied. Why wouldn’t I be okay?
“She was fine until you arrived.” Saint’s deep voice reminded me he was here, and my gaze swung back to him.
I felt my face heat from him witnessing my obvious weakness where Rio was concerned. I had told Saint that a guy broke me. He didn’t need to know who, and if I continued to stammer and act nervous, he would figure it out easily enough.
“She wasn’t struggling with her words when I left her this morning. That leaves me to assume you’re the cause of it.” Rio’s tone was challenging.
“Funny thing,” Saint replied. “She rarely ever stutters and never like this.”
I felt Rio stiffen beside me, and although I wasn’t sure why Rio was unhappy about Saint being here, I did know why Saint didn’t like Rio.
I held up my hand and took a deep breath before speaking. “Stop. Please.”
Both sets of eyes were on me then. My heart began to quicken its pace, and I was unsure what it was I needed to say and if I had the ability to say it without struggling with each word. The door opening slowly behind us saved me from having to do anything.
“Bryn?” Cullen said softly, looking from me to both men, then back at me.
I moved over to him and placed a hand on his shoulder. I could see the fear in his eyes and realized he’d woken alone, and like so many times before, he’d thought he’d been left. I never wanted him to feel that way again.
“Hey, buddy. I didn’t know you were awake. We had company, so I kept them out here, so you could sleep,” I explained to him.
He moved closer to me then, pressing his small body against my leg. My heart ached, as I knew he was searching for security. I was all he had. I slipped my arm around him and held him there, then looked up at Rio and then at Saint. I no longer felt nervous, but protective, and I knew I could control my words. Cullen needed me.
“Thank you for stopping by, Saint. I appreciate it. We are fine,” I told him. I knew his rough appearance would frighten Cullen.
The dark look in his eyes made it clear he believed something was going on between Rio and me. He had that all wrong, but I wasn’t going to explain it to him. This part of my life wasn’t Saint’s business. I hadn’t crossed that line with him, and I never would. He was work. This was home.
“If you need me, call,” he said. Then, without another word, he turned and walked away.
I sighed in relief. I didn’t want to burn bridges, but Saint would always be my boss and a friend. Nothing more. I didn’t want him in my personal life. It was separate from the club and needed to stay that way.
“Can we go inside?” Rio asked, and I nodded but said nothing as I walked Cullen back into the apartment.
I heard Rio close the door behind us, and I bent down, so I could look into Cullen’s eyes. Before I moved any further with Rio’s visit and the information he had for me, I wanted to reassure Cullen.
“If you ever wake up and you can’t find me, I will always be right outside the door. I did that, so we wouldn’t disturb you. But, buddy, I will never, ever leave you here.
I promise you that,” I told him, holding both his little hands in mine.
“Pinkie promise?” he asked me.
I let go of his right hand and held out my pinkie for him to link with his.
“Pinkie promise,” I said as we held our pinkies together like that for a moment.
He let go and put his little arms around my neck. I held him close, swallowing the emotion clogging my throat. It would take years for him to trust me completely. I’d left him with his mother too much. She had ruined his faith in adults or having any form of security.
“I love you,” I told him, wishing those three words could heal all the mistakes.
“I love you too,” he replied and squeezed me harder.
Chapter Twenty-One
Rio
The kid lifted his eyes from Bryn to look at me. “Are you staying over again?” he asked.
I felt an unfamiliar emotion tighten my throat, watching them. This wasn’t something meant for me to see, and I was afraid of how it would affect me now that I had. My goal in stopping by had been to tell Bryn it was all handled. They were safe. Then, I was going to leave and get ready for a date. The getting laid and getting Bryn out of my head was my plan. I’d even called Vanessa and asked her out, knowing she was a no-strings-attached kind of girl.
Before Bryn could respond, I nodded my head. “Yeah, I thought we could order pizza and let you pick out a movie for us to watch.” The words came out before I could think them through.
Seeing the bouncer here had flipped some damn switch in me I couldn’t control. There was what my head was telling me I wanted, which was Vanessa and a good fuck. Then, there was the rest of my damn body, demanding I stay here. With Bryn and Cullen.
The memories of my life with my mother weren’t good ones, and the time I had known Bryn were the worst. I had gone without food, a parent, electricity most of the time, and in the end, I’d found my mother dead. Keeping my distance from Bryn and the world I had left behind was what I needed to do.
