by Piper Rayne
Blanca knocks lightly on the door and pushes it open. She looks like she got about as much sleep as I did last night. Dark circles ring her eyes and her hair is thrown into a messy ponytail. She’s wearing yoga pants and a short shirt that reveals all her curves. Though she looks less put together than her normal self, she still looks good.
“Hey,” I say, wrapping my arms around her waist and picking her up to kiss her.
“Hi.” Her body doesn’t relax into mine, it’s tense and unsure.
“What’s up, Blanca?” Dylan says, getting up off the couch.
I place her back on her feet and she tosses her purse on my small table by the front door, heading into the living room. “Does everyone know?”
Dylan shakes his head. “No. Seth and Knox are all waiting to take their cue from you.”
She buries her head in her hands. “I’m a horrible friend. I should’ve told her this morning.”
“I didn’t get to ask last night. How good of friends are you? Because I dated her for over a year and I never heard your name.” I walk over to take a seat beside her on the couch.
The hurt on Blanca’s face says she wishes something was different between her and Sierra. “We lost touch for a few years, she’s the one who brought me to Cliffton Heights. She gave me a new start and a fresh start for our friendship was born in that moment as well. We’re childhood friends, we grew up together.”
Well fuck. I’d hoped they were roommates in college who didn’t get along all that well. Childhood friends means so much more. Not that I have any friends from childhood. Dylan’s my oldest friend and technically I met him when I was an adult.
“We didn’t know. I’m sure she’ll understand.”
“I have to talk to her.” She pulls her phone out of her back pocket and cradles it in her hands.
It’s then I realize they’re shaking. “Blanca,” I say.
“I should go.” Dylan stands. “Let me know if you need anything.”
“Thanks,” Blanca says.
I shoot him a nod of appreciation before he leaves the apartment.
“Blueberry muffins?” Blanca raises her eyebrows at me.
“So you know Rian’s in love with him too?” I ask.
She smiles. Crazy world. We now have so much more to talk about since I lived with the same people she does now.
“Want one?” I ask.
“Had one this morning. Fresh from the oven.”
I laugh and pull her into my lap. She comes easily and I take the opportunity to kiss her jaw. “Sierra isn’t unreasonable. The two of us didn’t work out. That has nothing to do with you and me.”
“About that. Can you tell me more about why you guys broke up?”
I stop kissing her and my hand falls off her hip. I blow out a breath because why would anyone want to tell their new girlfriend about their ex and why they didn’t work out? I don’t want to tell her I was selfish at times. That it wasn’t only Sierra, it was me too, but that I learned from that relationship and I won’t make those mistakes with her.
“We just didn’t get along. We fought all the time.”
“I’ve heard that, but what about? Were you jealous? Did someone cheat? I need more information.” She stares down at her fingers as she picks at her nails.
“I don’t really want to rehash my relationship with Sierra, and I don’t see why it matters. What happened with her has nothing to do with my relationship with you.”
She slides off my lap to sit next to me on the couch.
Her face is makeup-free and I love that she’s just as beautiful without it. Another thing I love about Blanca is that she’s transparent. She’ll never tell me one thing and mean another.
“I like you, Blanca, a lot and I know I’ve been a dick about the work thing. It’s hard for me not to worry that I’ll lose my job or vice versa because of being involved with each other, but it’s too late. I’m one hundred percent in this.”
She inhales a deep breath. “And it has nothing to do with getting back at Sierra for whatever you broke up over?”
“Seriously?” I jolt to my feet, needing space. I’d never do that even if I hated Sierra, which I don’t. “How could you think that of me?” I stalk toward the kitchen.
“I don’t know because I’m in the dark when it comes to you two. She hates you. I have no idea how you feel about her. I’m flying with no radar here.”
She follows me into the kitchen.
“I don’t hate her. We had our problems. Our fights were pretty out of control which usually resulted in me shutting down and disappearing for a few days. We just weren’t a match. No one cheated. No one lied. No one did anything terrible. It was just a relationship that didn’t work out. That’s all.”
“Okay.” She weaves a design on my counter with the tip of her finger and it’s clear she wants to ask another question, but she’s scared.
“What is it?” I ask, exasperated at having to rehash things about Sierra.
She looks up at me, square in the eye which tells me this is important to her. I slap my mental armor on to prepare myself. “Did you love her?”
I close my eyes for a second and when I open them she takes a step back. I try to grab her hand, but she backs up.
“That was a stupid question,” she says in an almost whisper. “You don’t stay with someone for a year if you don’t love them. Of course you loved her. She’s great. How could anyone not fall head over heels in love with her?” I can see her withdrawing from me the more she convinces herself I had some undying love for her best friend.
“I thought I loved her. I told her I loved her. But by the time it ended, I’m not sure what I felt. Love wasn’t it then, I can tell you that. It’s complicated. Haven’t you ever had a relationship that was a large part of your life that left you empty?”
“I haven’t had a lot of relationships. None where I loved the other person.”
I want to scream out Bingo! We have our answer as to where all this insecurity I never knew she possessed is coming from—she’s inexperienced to long-term relationships. “Blanca,” I say, finally grabbing her and pulling her to my chest. “I’ll tell you this, I’ve never felt this thing between us with anyone else.”
“What do you mean?”
“You know what I mean. It’s the same thing you’ve been talking about these past weeks. There’s something here between us and I’ve never felt this way before. Something that told me to screw the work situation and just go with it. That what we could be would be worth it.” Her forehead falls to my chest and she balls my T-shirt with her fists.
“She won’t let me have you,” she mumbles.
I kiss the top of her head. How did I not realize how much I want her until I feel her pulling away? “Who says she gets to be the one to give us permission.”
She tilts her head up and rests her chin on my chest, staring up at me. “I can’t date you if she tells me no. It’s not right. She’s my friend.”
Anger rushes through my veins. “She’s your best friend from years ago. You said yourself that you two were estranged for years. You’re gonna throw this away because Sierra throws a temper tantrum over the fact that I want you and not her?”
Her hands tighten pulling my T-shirt tighter as if she’s afraid I’m about to leave her. “I live with her. I…”
“Let’s go together. We talk to her together.” I place my hands on her cheeks so she can’t stray from looking at me. “I’ll be right there with you.”
“We can’t. That’d be like an ambush. But before we continue this, I need to talk to her.”
I stare into her gorgeous brown eyes. Eyes that have transfixed me from our first meeting on the train, so honest and pure. “But—”
She puts her finger to my lips and shakes her head. “Me alone.” Rising on her tiptoes, she replaces her finger with her lips.
Her lips press to mine and my hand falls to the back of her head not allowing her to move away from me. Our tongues glide along one anot
her’s with a kiss we’ve perfected over our short time together. A kiss I’d hoped of having numerous times with her, but now it feels like a goodbye kiss. The kind someone gives someone as a parting gift.
She ends the kiss and falls back to her heels, her hand running along the stubble on my cheek. “I’ll call you.”
“Blanca, let me come with you.”
She squeezes my hand. “Bye Ethan.”
I’ve never hated those two words more than I do watching her open my apartment door and disappearing through it.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Blanca
*
I take the long way home, stopping at Scrumptuals for a few pick-me-up brownies and cakes that will hopefully make Sierra take the news better than I expect. Everything that’s ever come out of her mouth about Ethan has been negative.
Opening up the door to the apartment, I hear shouting. Dylan has one foot on the edge of the couch and one on the coffee table. Seth stands by the window with one foot on each arm of the chair. Sierra’s standing on the kitchen table with no chairs in sight while Rian has one foot on a kitchen chair across the room and the other on a cushion on the ground.
“Lava!” Sierra yells and points to the ground.
I drop my purse on the entry table and walk across the room. “How old are we all?”
“Come on. It’s fun,” Sierra says.
“Are you playing Piranha?” I ask, sitting down on the couch.
Dylan shoots me a sympathetic look.
“No, we’re playing Volcano and Lava and you, my friend, have died from the burning lava,” Seth says.
I shrug my shoulders and put my feet up on the table.
“Time out. Blanca went to Scrumptuals,” Dylan says. He and Seth each climb off their spots.
“We were at a standstill anyway. You need to play with an odd amount.”
I pay no attention to Rian because they’re playing a childish game I used to get yelled at for when I was younger for throwing beautiful hand stitched pillows onto the dirty floor.
“I gotta get to work anyway.” Dylan jumps off the couch. “Seth, didn’t you say you were looking at a new piece?”
“Yeah, I’ll join you,” he says.
Sierra falls onto the couch next to me and grabs the box of sweets from me.
“Rian, I bet Seth could use your input,” Dylan says to her.
“Really?” Her face beams and she grabs her purse, following them to the door.
“See you guys later.” Dylan shuts the door and it leaves Sierra and me alone.
My stomach knots and clenches so bad my hands fall to it.
“Aren’t these brownies the best? Don’t tell Rian, but I think they’re better than hers.” She cringes and I don’t say anything. “How is Dom?” She pops another mini brownie into her mouth.
“Good. Val is six months pregnant, can you believe it?”
“I can’t believe they actually got married. I mean, they were the couple who were fated to be together from such a young age that it was like a horror story when she got pregnant with Ryder. The fact that they found their way back to each other all those years later is really something.”
I half listen to her. I wasn’t really surprised. Val and Dom were made for one another, it was just my pig-headed brother who probably kept them apart.
“Maybe I should’ve gone with you so I could visit my dad.” Her head falls back against the cushion. “Last time I talked to him he said he had a woman he wanted me to meet.”
My head falls onto her shoulder. I know how hard that must be for her.
At ten, Sierra’s mom went to war for our country and gave her life in return. I’m not sure her or her father ever fully got over it. They were both in the military and deployed at different times. It was a devastating loss and Sierra rebelled hard after that. So much so that Mama told me I couldn’t hang out with her for a while. She was never quite the same after that. Still awesome, but not as soft or smooth as she used to be. She had more jagged edges after losing her mom.
“Maybe this person will make him happy.”
She nods. “I don’t really want to find out.”
I find her hand between us and clench it because what people don’t understand about Sierra is how vulnerable she is when it comes to her family. I have to think that might have been a problem with her and Ethan since he goes to see his family every Sunday.
“I’ll go with you if you’d like.”
She turns to me and smiles. “I’d like that. Thanks.”
I nod. Taking a deep breath, I figure it’s now or never.
“I need to talk to you about something.” I sit up straighter but don’t let go of her hand. I turn to face her, and concern runs deep in her eyes.
“What is it?”
“You know last night how I went out with that guy from work?”
“Yes, and I was very upset you came home.” She winks and smiles.
I’m about to crush her.
“When he walked me home, we ran into Dylan, Seth, and Knox.”
Her shoulders fall. “Shut up. They met the mystery guy before me?” Her lips tip down and she almost pouts. “I’m your bestie! It’s supposed to be me who judges whether he’s good enough. I should tell you, as long as the guy drinks beer, watches sports and likes tattoos, the guys will love him. Their standards are very low.”
An awkward chuckle is the best I can do in response.
“This can be fixed. Invite him over tonight.” She stands up and heads into the kitchen, opening up the fridge. “We’ll go up on the roof and then we can all go out. He can spend the night here if you’d rather not spend the night there. Does he live alone? Or does he have roommates? Is that why you didn’t spend the night?”
“Man, you really are a reporter, Sierra.” She looks at me over her shoulder.
“Score! So if this goes well, we won’t see you around very often, huh? Remember hoes before Joes.” She laughs, cracking open a can of Diet Coke and sits down at the table, picking up a blueberry muffin. “Can you believe Rian lied to us? She never even went to her parents. These were totally for Dylan.”
I just stare at her, working up the nerve to say what I have to.
“Why are you looking at me like you’re about to give me bad news?”
I round the back of the couch to take a seat at the table. “The guy from work. You already know him.”
She tilts her head. “I do? How do you know?”
“Because Dylan, Seth, and Knox knew him when they saw us together.”
She purses her lips and surprise as well as intrigue falls over her face. “Who is it?”
“I just want you to know, I had no idea.”
Her face pales. She’s smart, investigative smart. It doesn’t take a lot because she pushes the Diet Coke aside and grabs a muffin, taking a chomp out of it. “Sig?”
“I only know him as Ethan Ryland.”
There. It’s out and there’s a rush of relief that encompasses my body. Sierra will react however she will, but at least I’m no longer withholding a secret.
“The guy from the train?”
I nod.
“The guy from the office? The bagel? The taco date?” She mumbles that last one to herself as if she thought he hated Mexican food.
“I’m so sorry. I had no idea until the guys found us outside the apartment last night.”
“You guys have slept together.” She seems to say this more to herself than me, but I nod anyway.
“I didn’t know, Sierra.” I reach for her hand, but she tucks her hands under the table.
“You like him?” I say nothing because I want her to absorb this information before we have that conversation. “You do, right? I mean I know that just from the way you talk about him.” I open my mouth to speak but she beats me to it. “I could tell you a thing or two about him. He’s not Mr. Nice guy. I should’ve figured it out because of the train ride on Sunday night. He always went home on Sundays. I was never invited on thos
e trips. His family life was always so hush-hush. I told you about how he punched my brother in the nose on Thanksgiving, right? Who does that? He was always so competitive.” She stops talking and looks at me. “But if you like him, go ahead, I’m not gonna stand between the two of you. Maybe it’s true love with you guys.”
A five-year-old could see the passive aggressiveness she’s throwing out there. She doesn’t want me to date him, which I already knew would be the case the minute they told me who Ethan was. In some layer deep down, Sierra still likes him or has some soft spot for him. Otherwise she wouldn’t hate him as much as she does.
“No. I’ll break it off.” The words escape in a rush and are painful to say, but it feels like the right thing to do.
She stands up and pushes her chair in. “Not on my account. I’m fine. Totally over him. You should invite him over tonight. I’d love to see the two of you together.” Now she’s just being completely fake.
“Sierra, can we please talk about this?”
“There’s nothing to talk about. I forgot I have a kickboxing class today.” She looks at the microwave clock. “I’m going to be late.”
“Sierra?”
“It’s fine, Blanca. The boys always loved you more than me. I’m not surprised Ethan does too.”
“That’s not fair. Neither one of us knew who the other were.”
She turns around at her bedroom door. “I said it’s fine. Go ahead and date him, but just so you know, he really is an asshole and not mature enough to have an actual relationship. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. But I wish you both the best.” She disappears behind her door and I slide down the chair, resting the back of my head on the top.
Her immature reaction to the news doesn’t surprise me. I’ve always given her a pass because of her mom dying young but I want to shake her right now and tell her to be real with me. Regardless, one thing is clear, she is not okay with me dating her ex-boyfriend.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Ethan