Once the food was done, they all sat at the picnic table, and it seemed one by one every member of her family grilled Kevin.
“You’re a soldier?” her father asked.
“Yes, sir, I’m in the navy.”
“Are you originally from here?” her mother asked.
He shook his head. “I was born in Albuquerque, grew up mostly in New Mexico. Don’t really have a particular place I call home. Except the navy.”
“So, you’ll be going back? Into active duty?” Justin asked.
“I’m on medical leave at the moment.” Jane watched Kevin reach out his left arm and stretch his fingers—something she’d seen him do often in the last few days. “I took a bullet to the shoulder, and it did some nerve damage in my arm. We’re waiting to see if the damage is permanent.”
“But you’ll go back out there when you’re cleared?” Jane found herself asking.
He turned and faced her, his blue eyes locking onto hers. He swallowed visibly. “That’s the plan. But now I have a home base to come back to. You and Stella.”
Jane’s heart crumbled like a sheet of discarded paper. No matter how she’d tried not to, she’d gotten her damn hopes up. Not for herself, but for Stella.
Her baby girl deserved to know her father.
Jane nodded and went back to her food, pushing the potato salad around with her fork.
…
After leaving Jane’s parents’ house, Kevin pulled up to the curb outside of the Thompsons’ old place. The FOR SALE sign hung from a post in the yard. It needed some trim work done, but other than that looked like the quintessential family home. Eerily like the magazine cutout he’d carried around in his wallet since he’d been a teenager.
“What is it about this place?” he asked.
“I don’t know. It’s always been my favorite. Seemed like the perfect family place. There’s this amazing treehouse in the back yard, and I always loved the shutters and the big front porch.” She shrugged.
“I stayed in a house like this one. Think I was there for about four months before I was moved somewhere else.”
She reached over and squeezed his thigh. “I’m sorry your childhood sucked,” Jane said. “I mean, my family is a total pain in the ass, but they’ve always had my back, and it’s not right you never had that.”
He nodded tightly but said nothing. He liked that she didn’t try to sugarcoat anything for him, just called it like it was. His childhood had sucked. “What’s up with your sister giving you so much shit?”
“She doesn’t mean anything by it. I’ve always been a little different than the rest of my family. Not as put together. Even before Stella I had a hard time getting my shit together. I’m good if I end up at school with clothes on that don’t have food smeared onto them.”
“I don’t know what you see when you look at yourself, Janie. I only see a beautiful, sexy, and amazing woman. You obviously went to college, and now you’re a successful and popular teacher. You’ve been raising our daughter alone and doing a damn fine job of it. If my mother would have put in a fraction of the effort you put into Stella, my life might not have been so shitty.”
He looked out the window in an effort to collect himself. He wasn’t generally an emotional man, and these big feelings were unfamiliar.
“My mom was beautiful,” he continued. “She was a model, magazines and catalogs mostly, but pretty successful. She got wrapped up in drugs as a way to keep thin. I have no idea who my dad is. I don’t think she ever knew, either. My mom OD’d when I was seven. I found her when I got home from school.” He shook his head. “I don’t even remember crying.”
Jane said nothing, but her hand kept periodically squeezing his thigh.
“So, from where I’m sitting, you going to work with coffee spilled on your shirt is nothing.”
“I didn’t mean to make light of…”
“No. That’s not what I meant. I come from nothing, Janie. Your family thinks you’re this hot mess, and I keep thinking that all I’ve ever been good at is lining something up in the crosshairs and pulling the trigger.” He turned his body to face her completely and cupped her cheeks. “So, ignore your family. You’re amazing.”
Then he kissed her with all the hunger he felt. Her soft lips parted in surprise, and he took full advantage by deepening the kiss, plunging his tongue into her hot mouth. She kissed him back, her hands coming up to wrap around his neck.
He went slow, taking his time to explore her mouth, and then suddenly she was pushing against his chest and shaking her head.
“No, Kevin, we can’t. I’m sorry, but I can’t.”
Chapter Seven
“Jane, hey, Jane, wait up,” a voice came from behind them.
Shit. She wasn’t ready to see anyone from work just yet until she and Kevin worked out all the details of their relationship. He’d only been back in her life for a couple of weeks. She slowly turned, forcing a smile on her face.
“Logan, hi,” she said.
He smiled broadly, then his eyes fell on Kevin with Stella perched on his shoulders.
Logan shoved a hand out. “Logan Roger, I’m a math teacher and golf coach at the high school with Jane.”
“Hey.” Kevin took the man’s hand and gripped it tightly.
Jane barely missed Logan’s grimace at Kevin’s squeeze.
“I’m Janie’s baby da…uh, babysitter, Kevin.”
“Oh, like a manny? A male nanny.” He nodded as if he were in on the joke. “Very progressive of you, Jane. So, when are you going to let me take you out? You can only make excuses for so long. Now that you’ve worked out your childcare issue, you free tonight?”
“Uh…”
“Yeah, Janie, now that you’ve worked out childcare, you’re free to date. Go, I’ve got this.” He glanced up at Stella. “Right, baby girl? We’re a good team.”
She squealed and tugged on Kevin’s hair, which only made him laugh. God, he looked good with his daughter—their daughter. It made her heart squeeze. But he wasn’t staying. He’d said as much to her dad. As soon as he was medically cleared, he was leaving. She’d never know where he was or what he was doing or if he was safe and coming back. It was not the life she wanted for Stella.
“Who coaches golf? I didn’t even know that was a thing,” Kevin said once they were in the car. He’d just finished buckling Stella into her car seat and had taken it upon himself to jump in on the driver’s side. He held his hand out for the keys, which she obediently gave him.
“We have a boys’ and a girls’ golf team. He coaches both.”
Kevin made some sort of disgusted noise in his throat. “He also has two first names. Makes him sound like a jackass.”
She tossed up her arms. “Then why did you force me to go out with him?”
“Hey, I’m just the manny, remember?”
“You almost introduced yourself as my baby daddy,” she said with a bark of a laugh.
“Yes, I did. I’d prefer to introduce myself as your fiancé or your husband.”
“Kevin, we’re not discussing this again.”
“Yes, you’ve made that abundantly clear. How long has he been asking you out?”
“I don’t know. A year or so.”
“You won’t date me, you might as well date the man with two first names.”
Was he testing her? She didn’t want to go out with Logan, but maybe she’d have fun. He was a nice guy. And she couldn’t have Kevin. Well technically, she could have him. He’d made that clear again and again. Her body definitely wanted him. She hadn’t had dry panties since he’d returned—her pussy was in a constant state of arousal. But she couldn’t commit to someone knowing she was an obligation or a duty.
Kevin was an honorable man, and so far, he’d made good on all his promises to get to know Stella and he’d abided by all of Jane’s rules. She knew he wanted her, in a “let’s have some sexy times” kind of way, but that wasn’t enough. She shouldn’t have to settle for less than marrying someone
who loved her. Not because she was the mother of his child, but because she was the one who made his heart sing. Ugh, when had she become so melodramatic?
“What are you ruminating about over there?” Kevin asked. He eyed the backseat before pulling out of the parking lot.
“Being someone’s first choice,” she said before she could stop herself.
He made a sound in his throat. “Yeah, I wouldn’t know what that’s like.”
She scoffed. “Oh please. There were no fewer than four women in that bakery who wanted to climb you like a pole.”
He was quiet for a minute before he spoke again. “You ever heard of adoption picnics?”
Her heart plummeted. She was a damned idiot. “No, I haven’t.”
“They’re these big gatherings where prospective families show up to, like, a city park. Then they bring a bunch of kids that are in the system. There’s usually fair food, you know like hot dogs and cotton candy. Because it’s such a good idea to sugar up kids before parading them in front of would-be adoptive parents.”
She swallowed but said nothing.
“Well, you can imagine how these shindigs went. The littles—the cute young ones—were the ones the families all glommed on to. The older kids were shuffled to the background. We were never the ones that people wanted. Especially the boys.” He glanced in the rearview mirror, then switched lanes. “I went to my last one when I was twelve. Just refused to go anymore.”
“Kevin—”
“Don’t. There’s nothing to say. It was a shit situation, but it was a long time ago. I’ve moved on. But yeah, I know all about not being anyone’s first choice. At least not in any way that matters.”
…
She slid the front door closed as quietly as possible then set her purse and keys on the front table. The TV was on but muted and showed some sports news or something. She’d almost left the room to go and check on Stella when the sight on the couch stopped her cold.
Kevin stretched out on her worn sofa and their daughter snuggled and sleeping soundly on his chest, his arms wrapped loosely around her. His own face was relaxed in slumber, and God he was so beautiful, it was always painful to look at him. To know she could never have him. Not the way she wanted. She could say yes and marry him, and she even figured he’d probably stay faithful while he was out chasing terrorists. But he’d never love her, or at least she’d never know if he loved her for her or just because she was Stella’s mom.
She slipped off her shoes then moved to him and bent to grab her daughter. She’d just bent over him when Kevin’s eyes opened.
“Hey,” he said, his voice sleepy and quiet.
“Hey, yourself. I’m just going to get her in her crib.”
He frowned. “No, I got her.” He maneuvered himself off the couch, all the while holding Stella to his chest. He walked to Stella’s room and put her to bed perfectly, as if he’d been doing it her entire life.
“How was your date?” he asked once they were back in the living room.
Jane plopped herself down on the couch, folding a leg under her. “Not the worst I’ve ever had, but not great.”
Kevin sat facing her so that their legs almost touched. “How so?”
“First of all, he talked about golf, like, the majority of the evening. I don’t even like putt-putt. So, I pretty much had no comment to all of that. Then at the end he tried to kiss me, and I turned my face at the last minute, and he ended up licking my cheek.”
Kevin winced. “That’s what he gets for leading with his tongue.”
“Terrible technique. And now it’ll be all awkward at school.” She sighed. “And the whole time I just kept thinking…”
“What?”
“That he wasn’t you.” She gave him a weak smile.
“Aw, Janie, do you need a better good-night kiss?”
“Your end-of-the-date kisses usually go better?” she asked, knowing she was playing a dangerous game.
“I’ve never licked a woman’s cheek. At least not the one on her face.” He leaned forward and put his hands on her face, cradling her. His blue eyes bored into her, stealing her breath. He licked his lips.
She smiled.
“That smile, baby, you have no idea what that smile of yours does to me.” Then he lowered his mouth to hers. Soft and sweet as if he had all the time in the world, his lips moved across hers.
…
He was kissing Jane. He was rock-hard and more than ready to pull her into his lap, but he didn’t want to scare her away. He deepened the kiss, slipping his tongue into her mouth, tilting her head just the way he needed it. Her tongue swept against his, and suddenly things had shifted from tentativeness to hunger.
She moved so that she straddled him and rubbed herself against his erection.
“I want you, Janie. I’ve never wanted anyone the way that I want you.” He kissed down her throat to the sensitive place at her collarbone.
“Take me to bed, Kevin,” she said, arching into him.
He lifted her as he stood, and she wrapped her legs around his waist. His eyes searched hers, the gray coloring nearly being swallowed by the black of her pupil. “Sure?”
“Yes. I’m a mom first. Always. But with you, I feel like a woman. Tonight, I need that.”
He walked them to her bedroom then shut the door. “Take your clothes off,” he told her as he let her slide down his body. He tugged his shirt over his head then stripped off his jeans, boxers, and socks until he stood in front of her naked. He wrapped a hand around his hard cock and gave it a tug. “I wanna take my time with you.”
Make love to you.
But he couldn’t say that. Hell, he didn’t even know what love was.
Her eyes slid down his body, and he felt it as strongly as if she’d touched him. Her hands went to her shirt, and she unbuttoned it and slipped it off her shoulders, leaving her in a pale-yellow bra. Her jeans were next and then her underwear, and then she was naked. Gloriously naked. He drank in the sight of her body, her curves more pronounced than he remembered—her breasts fuller, her hips rounder, and a gentle slope to her belly.
She swallowed. “I’m not as thin as I was before I had Stella.”
“No, you’re curvier, and it’s delicious.” He moved to her and weighed her breasts in his hands. “So fucking sexy. I’ve always loved your tits, so responsive. These nipples,” his thumbs scraped across both hard points, “delicious.” He lowered his mouth and sucked one into his mouth then the other.
She lifted his head. “I want to do something.” Her tongue peeked out and licked her lips. She gripped his cock and stroked upward.
He hissed a breath out his teeth. “Whatever you want to do, baby, I’m all yours.” He knew he meant that, in more ways than one, but now wasn’t the time to say it. She was still skittish about them, and he didn’t want to do anything that put a stop to this.
“Lay down.”
She didn’t have to tell him twice. He crawled up to the center of her bed and sprawled out. She started at his feet and crawled up his body, running her hands up his legs as she went. Her eyes were hooded and so heavy with lust he could come just from looking at her. Then she bent her head and licked up his shaft.
“Fuck, Janie.”
Her lips wrapped around his cock, and she sucked hard. “I can’t fit you all the way in my mouth,” she said then swirled her tongue around the tip. He grabbed her by the armpits. “C’mere. I have a better idea.”
“But I want—”
“And you can but come here.”
She crawled up his body.
“Now turn around. Let me lick that sweet pussy of yours while you suck me.”
“Your mouth is filthy,” she said with a wicked grin. But she did as he commanded, lowering her hot, wet center to his mouth.
Fuck, yeah!
He slipped his tongue inside her, lapping at her sweet nectar. Her moan vibrated through his dick. She sucked him furiously, and he ate her like she was his last meal. Her lips and tongu
e felt better than anything he could remember, and his balls tightened, pleasure racing down his spine. He couldn’t come yet, though. He wanted to do that inside of her, facing her. He was a fucking SEAL. He’d endured Hell Week. He could delay his own orgasm.
He added two fingers curling up inside her, and he sucked her clit into his mouth. She ground herself against his mouth.
Her own ministrations stopped, and she pushed back into him, chasing her pleasure. Damn but she was sexy, and she didn’t even understand that.
“Oh God, oh Kevin, oh, oh, oh. You’re going to make me come.” She slid her wet pussy across him while he licked and finger fucked her, and then she tightened her grip on his thighs and shattered. She rode out her orgasm then shifted off him. “Guess I’m not so good at multitasking.”
“No, baby, you were amazing.”
Her eyes fell to his still-engorged cock, and she ran her fingertips over it. He hissed.
She wiped up a drop of precum and brought it to her lips, sucking her finger with a pop. “Do you want me to finish?”
He gripped her hips and shifted her to straddle him. “I want you to ride me.” Then he sat up. “Shit, I don’t have any condoms. I wasn’t exactly expecting this.”
She shoved at his chest until he was laying back down. “Relax, I’m on birth control. Just a little something I added to my life after our big surprise. And I know we’re both clean.” She gave him that grin of hers that seemed to simultaneously wrap around his heart and melt it.
“You have no idea how beautiful you are, do you?”
“No need to sweet-talk me now. We’re definitely doing this.” She positioned him at her entrance and slid down until he was fully seated inside her.
“I’ve never said anything to you I haven’t meant 100 percent. Now give me a minute, because I’ve never gone bareback, and your hot pussy is blowing my mind right now.”
She giggled and her inner walls squeezed him.
“Shit, Janie, you’re gonna make me blow before it’s time.”
“Sorry.” But her smile said otherwise.
Men In Uniform Anthology Page 18
