by A. L. Knorr
"He died on the ice. Heart failure. It was a real shock because he was still so young. We never even knew he had heart issues."
He shook his head and made a single 'tsk' sound with his tongue. "What a shame. And your mom never remarried?"
I tried not to laugh. “Mom is more focused on dodging men than dating them. Her passion is diving. Who knows, maybe one day she'll fall in love again. But I haven't seen her take an interest in anyone since my dad died."
"I'm sure she has her hands full if she wants to stay single. You don't see women like your mother every day." His eyes lingered on mine.
"Are you crushing on her too?" I took a sip of my water, keeping my eyes on him.
He laughed. "She's pretty amazing, but no. Your mom..." he paused and leaned in to whisper, "...she scares me."
I laughed. "Dude, you have no idea."
As we pulled up to the garage and left Antoni's Jeep for the valet to park, I was surprised by how much I had enjoyed the night. I found myself sneaking glances at him when he didn't know I was looking, trying to search within myself for how I felt.
Before we went into the manor we stood in the yard to admire the stars. We walked out into the darkness, the soft grass cushioning our footfalls. His hand went to the small of my back, a caring gesture as we couldn't see where we were stepping. The clouds had finally broken and the black sky was filled with fairy lights. He dropped his hand from my back when we stopped walking and looked up.
"Gorgeous," I said. This sky looked very different than the one I had seen from Georjie’s back yard less than two weeks ago.
"Yep. We might actually get a nice day tomorrow. If it's warm enough would you like to go to the beach?" He turned his face towards me in the dark.
"Yes, please. I love the ocean." How could I not, with a siren for a mother?
Our serenity was interrupted by boisterous male voices. Two people entered through the gate at the end of the driveway. I recognized their voices: Eric and Jeff. It was obvious they'd had a few drinks. They weren't aware of our presence.
"Idiot Pollacks," spat Eric. "If they wanted the job they shouldn't be such shit divers. Old man Novak ain't stupid. He knows pros when he sees 'em. That's the last time I'll spend my money in that pub."
"Ha!" Jeff responded. "Your money? Does your bookie know you're drinking his earnings away in Poland?"
There was the sound of a fist making contact with a body and air leaving a chest by force. "Shut up, jackass. You're gonna help me make it right."
They disappeared around the side of the manor. We heard a door open and close.
"I'm sorry," I said. I was embarrassed and horrified that Eric had used a racist slur. Simon would have been mortified.
"It's not your fault," Antoni answered. "I know men and I know drink. I also recognize men with gambling problems, and I think that guy Eric is in a bit of trouble."
"How do you know?" I asked as we climbed the steps to the main entrance.
"I've overheard them in the evenings a couple of times now. They like to play poker and he gets a little too involved, let's say. They invited me a few times, which I appreciate but I don't know how to play poker. Besides, they play for real money and I'm not interested in losing mine that way."
He sounded more straight-laced and responsible than any other guy I’d known. Surprisingly, I found it more attractive than I’d ever found the guys with a reputation for being ‘exciting’ to be. The dangerous guys were more to Saxony’s taste.
We went through the foyer, the lights had been dimmed for the night and the space was full of shadows. We went up to the first landing, where Antoni and I needed to go our separate ways. Suddenly, I felt awkward, like it was the end of a date. "Thanks for another great day, I had a lot of fun," I said, clasping my hands in front of me and feeling like an idiot.
"Thank you too. It's not every day that I get to spend time in such lovely company and be paid for it," he responded.
And there it was. He was being paid to take care of me. In the game of he likes me, he likes me not, I just swung back in the direction of not for the tenth time that day. I was getting a little seasick. I gave him a boyish shove on the shoulder with my fist. "Night, Antoni."
"´Spij dobrze," he responded, and turned away.
My phone vibrated when I was just outside my suite.
Georjayna: Who's the cute marine?
She was referring to his short hairstyle and his Novak Shipping jacket, which looked like a navy uniform.
Me: That's Antoni. I've been assigned a babysitter.
Saxony piped in too. Hello. He can babysit me anytime. Is he funny?
Me: He's Polish. Everything he says is funny. We're just frnds.
Saxony: WHAT. R U Unwell? WkeUp, T-Nation.
Georjayna: He's rather pretty, isn't he. Nice guy?
Me: Very.
Georjayna: Lucky you.
Georjayna sent through a photograph of a young man walking in front of a vine-covered building that looked like it might be a garage. He was carrying several broken old windows. I clicked on the photo and zoomed in on him. He was muscular and darkly tanned. Dark hair curled out from under a baseball cap, and he had dramatically dark eyebrows and eyelashes.
Me: Looks like you lucked out too. Tall?
Georjayna: He's a giraffe. Even next to me.
Saxony: What the... Is that your COUSIN?!
Georjayna: Not by blood. Adopted, remember?
Saxony: Merciful heavens.
Me: What's he like?
Georjayna: Friendly as a nest of vipers. Nothing lucky about it.
Saxony: Would you like me to have him killed? I've been here two weeks and I've already made friends in the mafia.
Poor Georjayna. It didn't sound like her summer in Ireland was off to a good start if her cousin was going to be a miserable sod.
I closed my phone case and let myself into our suite, thinking back to the boys I'd dated. They'd all seemed so young, so immature. So, in Antoni, I had found an older guy – a very attractive older guy. He was smart, sincere, driven, funny, and gentlemanly. All things being equal, I should finally be feeling the heart palpitations and the butterflies, shouldn't I?
Chapter 12
The next day was overcast but we deemed it worthy enough to be a beach day. I was excited to do something different. I loved the history and architecture, frequenting the cute cafes and strolling by the canals. But I was dying to let my hair loose and go for a swim.
Antoni had the staff put together a picnic lunch and we walked from the manor to the ocean through sandy bluffs and scrubby trees. The wind tugged at my hair, and even though it wasn't bright enough for sunglasses I put them on to keep sand from blowing in my eyes.
The beach was a half hour walk from the Novak estate and as we crested the hill, I saw it up close for the first time. It was a golden yellow colour. The water was a dark, murky blue, not dissimilar to the beaches of home. Hardy grasses poked up from the sand, waving in the wind like wheat, and at the edge of the bluff was a cluster of large stones. We crossed the scrubby section and hit the sand. The grains were large and coarse and squished up through my toes. I only wished it was a bit warmer. A lot of people must have agreed with me as there weren't many out on the beach.
"Did you know that the Baltic has much less salt than other oceans?" Antoni asked me as we scouted for a good place to put down a blanket.
"I did actually. I mean, I didn't until the flight over here. Micah told me. He said it's one of the reasons that The Sybellen is in such good shape."
Antoni nodded. "That's right. We also experience big fluctuations in how much sea life we get from year to year. The currents that bring the salt down from the North Sea are always different. Sometimes, there are large areas of the Baltic that have virtually no sea life except for bacteria," he continued, sounding teacherly. "We also sometimes have algae problems over the summer because of fertilizer runoff."
"Really, how interesting, professor," I said, unfurling
our beach blanket on a clear patch of sand.
He looked at me like he couldn't tell if I was being sarcastic. "Enough with the biology lesson? Time for a sun tan?"
"No," I said, stripping down to my bikini. "Time for a swim." I tossed my sunhat and sunglasses down on the blanket, which was already starting to blow away.
"You said beach. I brought you to the beach. You didn't say swim," he deadpanned, setting the sun chairs on the corners of the blanket to hold it down. He sat down in one and made a show of getting comfortable.
"You have to. It's your job, remember?" I teased.
He balled up his towel and threw it at me, but he stood up and took off his shirt and ball cap. He wore navy swim shorts with the mermaid icon embroidered on them.
"Nice shorts, princess.”
He looked down. "Embroidery is very masculine I'll have you know," he said. "I have quite the reputation in town due to her." He rubbed his thumb over the mermaid. "No one messes with me."
"I'm sure they don't. You're downright intimidating."
Through shedding his layers he revealed not only that he was fit, but also that he spent more time in clothes than out of them. He was almost as pale as me, only his hide included freckles across his shoulders. Otherwise, his body was a perfect landscape of blank white skin. He was a tattoo artist's dream. He was broad and long, with a deep chest and back. But he had no ink that I could see and I wondered if he'd ever been tempted. Probably not. He was too square for that.
I laughed at his grimace when we waded into the cool sea. Cold water had never bothered me and I dove in and swam out far enough to lose the bottom. I stuck my tongue out to taste the Baltic. Nothing.
Antoni didn't give me the satisfaction of splashing him before he'd had a chance to adjust to the temperature. He braced himself and dove in, popping up moments later and bellowing something in Polish. I laughed but didn't ask him to interpret.
We chatted while we swam out to sea and then parallel along the beach for a while, and then back. Antoni’s teeth started to chatter.
"Ok, I'm a popsicle. Can I go now? You're a freaking polar bear.” He put his feet down on the sand and stood. His nipples were completely erect and gooseflesh covered his lean body.
"Go on, then." I splashed his back as he ran away.
He made a caricature of himself as he ran out of the water, exaggerating being stiff and frozen. It worked – I laughed. I found myself feeling wistful as I watched him dry off. He was perfect and by far the most interesting, attractive guy I'd ever spent time with. Yet, somehow, I was still void of desire. I wanted the warm feeling Saxony always talked about.
Before long he was back in his clothes with his towel around him. He sat down in the sun chair and pulled a book out of the beach bag.
I swam for long enough to tire myself out then headed back to shore. It wasn't that much fun swimming on my own. The wind picked up and goosebumps swept across my skin as I left the water and ran back to our blanket. I pulled a giant towel out of our bag and wrapped it around myself.
Antoni said, "I know it's early, but swimming always makes me hungry. Do you want to eat something?" he asked as he stuck his nose into the bag. "We've got fish sandwiches, apples, and cheese. Oh, and..." he pulled out a bottle full of brown liquid and squinted at the label doubtfully. "Iced tea?"
My stomach growled. "Absolutely, I'm actually starving."
The sound of the waves breaking on the shore had intensified. My wet hair whipped into my face, stinging my eyes. "The wind is picking up," I said. "I'm not so sure we picked the perfect day to spend at the beach." I sat down on the blanket, towelling my hair.
Antoni pulled out one of the sandwiches and handed it to me. He looked thoughtful. "You're right. You know what we should do instead? I can't believe I'm only thinking of it now. The wind is perfect for it."
"What's that?" I unwrapped the herring sandwich and took a big bite. It was saltier than I'd expected but delicious. The bread was fresh.
"Take out the laser.” He unwrapped his own sandwich.
I swallowed my bite. "What's a laser?"
"It's a two-person boat. It's fun and it's fast. You want to?" His eyebrows shot up and he gave me the enthusiastic look I had come to like.
"I'm game."
"Do you get seasick?" he asked as we were eating our apples and cheese.
I shook my head. "I never have so far, but I don't spend a lot of time on boats. Is it pretty..." I mimicked the movements of an unstable vessel with my hand.
He laughed. "Yes, it’s as tippy as a surfboard. That's part of the fun."
“Good thing we just ate.”
He looked concerned. "Should we wait until after we've digested?"
"No, I'm only kidding. I think that’s an old wives tale anyway.”
Fifteen minutes later we headed back to the estate. I changed into shorts and a sun shirt, and Antoni said he’d find me a pair of water shoes.
We took the staff at the boathouse by surprise and they scrambled to get the laser down and ready to go. Although they weren't speaking in English, I could sort of tell what was being said. Antoni kept apologizing and telling them not to worry, that it was a last minute decision. He was kind, but they still looked embarrassed that they hadn't been able to read the mind of Martinius' PA.
The laser turned out to be even smaller than I imagined. There were two diminutive sails and the boom was so low that you had to almost lay flat in the boat to duck under it as it swung back and forth. The vessel was so shallow that it was more like a raft.
Antoni held the boat still in the shallows while I got in. Just as we were pushing the boat out into deeper water one of the boathouse staff called something to Antoni from the dock. Antoni told me he'd asked us to wait a moment.
The man dashed back into the boathouse and emerged with a two-way radio, which he tossed to Antoni. He caught it and snapped it onto his belt. He took hold of the rudder and turned the raft so the sail caught the wind. The laser immediately lurched forward. The shore fell away behind us.
Antoni taught me how to steer with the rudder, and lean out over the water when the boat seemed like it was going to tip. The faster we went, the steeper the boat angled.
"Want to go for another swim?" he asked. Before I could answer we were tilting so sharp and going so fast it took my breath away. I laughed, half joyful and half freaking that we were going to tip. We both leaned out over the water together for counterbalance. The waves zoomed by underneath us. The feeling of being on the edge made my heart leap into my throat.
The wind pushed us along at an increasing speed and the beach curved alongside, moving away and then moving closer as we traveled. We sailed for close to an hour, and I was amazed at how much ground we'd covered in that time. I could see the Gdańsk port off in the distance.
A small ray jumped out of the water less than five feet from us. It flashed his belly at us and I got a clear view of his straight mouth and tiny eyes.
"He's checking us out. Those devil rays are super curious," Antoni said.
A few minutes later, Antoni called over the wind and waves, "We should turn around. Going back is going to take longer because we'll have to tack against the wind."
"Just a little further. Please?" I begged. I loved it. "I might have to put 'laser' on my Christmas list."
He grinned. "Like it?"
"I haven't had this much fun in... Ever."
“Hang on to your sunglasses!" We caught another gust of wind. We picked up speed again, and as we leaned out over the water together the boat went up on its side. I felt like my face was going to crack from grinning.
We hit choppier water and skipped like a pebble. The scenery of the beach had changed, now there were more rocks and artificial breakers. There were a few people on the beach, picking their way along the rocks - small figures in the distance. A few of them waved.
After another fifteen minutes, Antoni slowed the laser. "Let's turn around. The wind is picking up and those look mildly unfri
endly." He pointed and I turned and looked back in the direction we'd come. Mildly unfriendly was an understatement for the thunderheads darkening over the water. I swallowed down my anxiety. If Antoni was calm, then I would be too.
Calmly, Antoni steered the boat in a circle, giving me directions. “Pull the tiller towards you and lean back to push the bow out of the water. Yep. Just like that.”
We had to sail in a zigzag fashion when going against the wind. The thunderheads looked heavy and full of rain, but I thought we had a good chance of making it back to the boathouse before the showers came. The ride turned rough, my neck jarred a few times as the boat dropped into hollows between waves. I kept my mouth shut so I didn’t bite my tongue.
Once Antoni had shown me how to tack, he stopped talking. He was at the rudder and I was in front. It wasn't until I looked back at his face after he'd been quiet for a while that I noticed that his mouth was tight. There was a deep line between his eyes that hadn't been there before.
"Anything wrong?" I asked. "The look on your face is making me nervous."
"We're ok. Just wish we'd headed back sooner. These waves are a little too choppy for my liking.”
We settled back to the business of sailing, but soon I felt like Antoni was having difficulty keeping us on course. The wind was much stronger now, ripping at the sails and ropes. Fear began to curdle in my belly when I realized that the boathouse was no closer than it had been ten minutes earlier.
A huge gust caught our sail and before I could react, the laser was wrenched over and I was dumped back into the cold embrace of the Baltic.
Chapter 13
I flailed under the water, twisting to right myself. When I finally popped up I saw that the laser was on its side and Antoni had crawled up on top of it and was clinging to it like a monkey. I paddled towards him but the wind shoved the boat away from me much faster than I was able to swim.
Antoni looked around, his face serious. He spotted me and called over the growing expanse of ocean between us, "Targa, are you hurt?"
