It’s only my opinion, but… This devalues the importance of your opinion.
I’m sure many of you might disagree, but… People are quite ready to disagree with speakers if they have different opinions. You don’t have to invite them to disagree with you. By saying this, you are putting your audience in a state of disagreement, and they will listen to what you say next through a filter of what is discordant. Also beware of “One could argue that…” Using the word “argue” will likely trigger your listeners’ desire to debate your information.
I may be incorrect on this, but… Your audience will be wondering why you are bothering to speak if you may be incorrect. Why waste their time with doubtful information? Everything you say from now on will be received with skepticism.
Tentative language
There’s a big difference between directive communication, and communication designed to be tentative. Tentative language is defined as “cautious” or “hedging” language, and it’s favored in academic writing where you must be careful of making assertions without qualifiers. Phrases such as appears to be, or perhaps might be attributed to, or might be seen in some cases as, are all examples of tentative, softening terms seen in academic reports. Limiting words, such as possibly, probably or likely also convey uncertainty. This kind of approach does not translate to contexts where you want to come across as clear, assertive and confident. When your goal is to inform and lead, employing a more directive approach with fewer words is more effective.
Tentative: “I don’t really have the exact numbers and I may be a bit off, but…”
Directive: “The numbers we have at this point are…”
Tentative: “Without having seen all the data yet, it’s hard to say for sure whether this is indeed the best way to go, but I think it may be likely that…”
Directive: “From the data I’ve seen so far, here’s my view on how we should proceed…”
Tentative: “In some developing countries about which we can be reasonably confident of the data, our evidence may point to a possible supposition that the involvement of a greater percentage of women in the formal sector could have a slightly positive effect on overall GDP rates. So we could perhaps think about addressing gender gap disparities when designing country assistance strategies for those client countries that might possibly be willing to undertake targeted, gender-based labor policies.”
Directive: “Our research shows that bringing more women into the labor force can boost GDP rates by nearly 2% a year, and push up incomes by more than 10%. So how can we best assist the countries we work with in investing in women and girls?”
Words and phrases to eliminate
I think. This phrase is often misused, and comes across as tentative, as in: “I think we’ve found a promising way forward.” Speakers use “I think” as a softening term to blunt any possible aggressiveness the listener may construe. The problem is, the statement is weakened, and what is conveyed is uncertainty rather than a weighted opinion coming from an authority. Better to say: “I’m confident this is a promising way forward.”
“I think” can easily be replaced by a number of stronger terms, including: “In my view,” or “According to my analysis…” You can use “I think” when there is uncertainty, or you are still thinking through an idea that is not fully formed, because in such cases you really are describing your thinking process. (“At this point we think this is the best way forward. However, there are other options we need to consider as we get more information.”)
Try. “I’m going to try to give you a summary of the report…” Don’t try, as if there is a chance you won’t succeed. Do it. Instead say, “Here’s a summary of the report…”
Hope. We hear this word all the time from a vast majority of presenters or at meetings:
“Hopefully, this presentation will be interesting to you.”
“I hope I was able to answer all your questions.”
It implies that these speakers are not sure they were able to answer questions on the topic they were just presenting! When used in this context, hope implies supplication, and puts you subliminally on a lower plane than those you are supplicating to. Instead say:
“I know you’ll find this presentation intriguing, and look forward to a lively discussion afterwards.”
“Thank you for these great questions. I’m glad we had time for such a rich discussion.”
You can use “hope” when you truly mean hope. For example, as a noun to mean expectation, vision or desire, as in: “Our hope for you today is that these new tools and techniques will turn you into a compelling and powerful communicator.”
Just. This word also devalues and diminishes the worth of what you will say next. Eliminate it.
“I just want to add my opinion.” “I just want to say a few words.” “I just want to point out something that I think is important, and I really hope you will too. Let me try to be concise…”
Instead say:
“Here’s how I see it…”
“Let me add a few words…”
“I want to briefly point out an important aspect of this topic…”
But. This word negates what comes before it. Imagine this: what if your boss called you in and said, “I’ve been watching you. You’re working to full capacity and taking on a lot of new responsibilities, but…” Then the phone rings and he or she stops to answer it. What are you thinking? Probably: “I’m getting fired.” What if the scenario went like this: “I’ve been watching you. You’re working to full capacity and taking on a lot of new responsibilities, and…” Now the phone rings. This time you’re thinking, “I’m getting a raise!”
And can be substituted easily for but to make your statements less negative. Instead of: “The government’s efforts have been beneficial, but there’s so much more to do,” you can say, “The government’s efforts have been beneficial, and there’s more to do.”
Negative language
Speaking in negatives diminishes the power of your messages and can confuse your audience. You are highlighting what is not the case or what you do not do:
“It’s not true to say that I am an argumentative person.”
“I can’t agree with those who say I am arrogant.”
Instead, assert what is. This improves the clarity of your speech, and keeps you from sounding defensive. So instead of the negative phrasing in the example above, you could say, “I’m quite agreeable and open to new ideas.”
Also, when you state things in the negative, listeners tend to believe the opposite of your denials:
Negative: “I am not a corrupt official who takes bribes. I am not a crook!”
Better: “I have always been honest. Integrity and honesty are everything to me.”
Negative: “We’re not here just to grab as much power as we can for our party.”
Better: “We are here to work for all the people of Nepal. That is our goal.”
Negative: “I’m not saying your comments aren’t appreciated.”
Better: “I appreciate your comments.”
Political strategists often use negative language, because combined with strong visuals and messages that evoke fear they can have a powerful impact on an audience. They work by convincing an audience to move away from something, or to not choose a particular candidate or legislation. They are rarely motivational or inspirational, and are often bluntly manipulative.
If you strategically decide to use negatives to show your audience what needs to change, always provide a vision of what you do want. For example, a development agency’s mission statement could be, “We are working towards a world free of poverty.” While this phrase explains simply what the organization’s efforts are working to move away from, it would be better if said this way: “We are working for a world in which every citizen can thrive and prosper.” Statements of leadership are more effective if those you seek to motivate can clearly see the goal they are working towards, instead of the not-goal they are trying to avoid.
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Confident Expressions
After learning about all the expressions to avoid, here are some ways to begin your statements that increase clarity and impact. They capture an audience’s attention immediately and make you sound confident:
I propose…
I urge you to…
I’m confident that…
The facts on this issue are…
My/Our recommendation is…
Let’s look at the numbers…
I have 3 points to make. Number 1…
I’ll give you 2 reasons why this is so…
Research in psychology and communication has shown that the most memorable words are those that are short and evoke strong emotion. Too often speakers pepper their talks with abstract terms, buzzwords, or bits of conceptual language that wash over an audience and do not make an impact. These are words and terms such as “sustainable development,” “inclusive growth,” “biodiversity,” “value chains,” “beneficiaries,” “non-food items,” and so on. Every industry and professional area has its special language. While audiences may understand these terms, they do not create images in the minds of the listeners, and this is key.
Concrete words are objects or events we can see, hear, feel, taste or smell. So, for example, instead of talking about agriculture, you should talk about coffee growers, or maize crops. Even “crops” alone does not conjure up an image. Be specific. Beneficiaries could be referred to as, “the families in the fishing villages near the dam.”
If you need to say one of the buzzwords for a particular audience or context, follow it up with the concrete phrase that will create more impact: “We want to make sure Africa’s growth is inclusive growth. That means making sure that women and young people in particular get the opportunities they deserve.”
The reason specificity is important is that the brain retains information best when that information is connected to one of our senses. When we speak, our visual sense is the easiest to activate. When you use visual words, you turn on an additional, different part of the human brain from just our left-hemisphere, analytical side. Concrete words stimulate the right side of the brain, which conjures images, triggers memory, and is connected to our emotional and motivational centers. We are rarely motivated or inspired by abstract terms.
For example, “freedom,” “equality,” are strong words we all can aspire to. However, Martin Luther King Jr added strong visual images to those abstract terms in his “I Have a Dream” speech:
I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood…
I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists…one day right there in Alabama, little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.
I have a dream today.
Here’s an example, from one of our courses, on how to improve the impact of your statements by using concrete, visual words:
“A World Bank sanitation project aimed at reducing the incidence of cholera in low-income communities was also successful at providing training and jobs for slum-dwellers.”
Better: “In the slums of Soweto, or the favelas in Rio, one of the disturbing things you see are open channels of sewage flowing through the streets and alleys…and children playing alongside them. A World Bank community project hired and trained unemployed residents to put in closed PVC pipes into these open channels. Within a few months, the incidence of cholera in these neighborhoods dropped by more than half.”
The improved example makes much more of an impact. In fact, we still remember this example word for word though it’s been a few years since we first heard it, and we only heard it once.
Whenever possible, use real facts and numbers as opposed to vague, broad statements. Some listeners might hear such statements as just your opinion. For example: “The education budget was quite low again this year, while the military budget was too high.”
Better: “This year’s education budget was once again less than 2% of total budget allocation. That’s the lowest in the region. Meanwhile, the military budget was raised from last year, to nearly 70% of total budget allocation. That’s the highest in the region, and actually, one of the highest in the world.”
Studies on communication and perception of audiences have shown that people tend to think those who use numbers are smarter speakers. Do not overwhelm the audience, however, with too many numbers, and make sure the numbers you use are relevant and key. Comparisons are quite useful to explain the importance of numbers. For example: “A hundred years ago the wild tiger population was over 100,000. Now there are only 3200 tigers living in the wild.”
Summary: 7 Elements of Powerful Communication
1. Show confident body language
Stay open. Do not cross your arms. Sit up straight. Relax and occupy your space. Maintain eye contact. Gesture naturally. Smile when you greet your audience and when you thank them at the end.
2. Speak so your audience listens and absorbs
Speak clearly and modulate your voice, so that your words are music to your listeners’ ears. Don’t rush. Avoid “ums” or “ahs.” Emphasize key words by saying them a bit louder than the rest. Pause at the end of sentences, and before or after important phrases to draw attention to each one.
3. Speak in short sentences
Short sentences help your audience process and retain what you say.
4. Use powerful expressions
Choose expressions that show your authority, such as “I propose…” Eliminate those that are weak, tentative, self-diminishing or conceptual. Four words to drop: try, hope, just, but.
5. Avoid negatives
Speaking in the negative can confuse your audience by highlighting what is not the case or what you do not do. Instead, say what is true, or what you actually do.
6. Be specific
Speak about specific facts and numbers; avoid generalities and value judgments. The statement “Ireland did not do very well last year” can be construed as an opinion. “Ireland’s growth rate fell last year from 8% to 1%” is a fact. Be concrete, and use word pictures.
7. Structure your remarks
Keep your audience’s journey in mind. How will you move them from A to B?
Part III
Answering Questions
Chapter 7
Answering Questions Effectively
What’s the best way to answer a question? Give the answer up front, make your main point clearly, back it up with a good, relevant example, and wrap it up in under a minute. Would you like more information? Now the details…
1. Answer the Question First
Answering questions is one of the most potentially effective forms of communication, because a dramatic tension is created in the act of asking. An exchange is about to take place akin to the electrical impulse passing between nerve cells. There’s a power dynamic between one who knows, and one who doesn’t, that will shift as soon as the answer comes. And there is anticipation of the unknown, about what is going to be revealed in the answer. All this is the perfect situation for heightened attention, the state in which information can most effectively be transferred from one mind to another.
Sadly many people, especially experts, blow it. They inadvertently shut down this gift of attention. They do this by starting with the background, context or history surrounding the issue before they get around to answering the question. In working with hundreds of economists, environmentalists and scientists all around the world, we’ve come to the conclusion that this is because experts answer questions in the same format they use for presenting academic papers. They first put forward context and premises, explain methodology, present findings, and at the end, reveal their results and conclusions. But when you do this for answering questions in a media interview, presentation, meeting or simple conversation, listeners easily get confused, frustrate
d or just plain bored. The tension dissipates without being resolved. People stop listening. As we stress throughout this book, communicating is about impact, not about output. You may be waxing eloquent about your topic, but if nobody is listening to you, you are just talking to yourself.
Instead, when asked a question, begin first with a direct answer to the question. This immediately satisfies your questioners’ desire to know the answer. It releases the tension while making them receptive to what you have to say next. As an example, here’s the before-and-after response to a question, as answered by a wildlife biologist we worked with recently:
Question: What’s the best method of controlling deer populations in North America?
Answer: Well, there are a lot of reasons for deer and human conflict. In some communities, it’s deforestation: there’s too much building of houses on land that used to be forests. In other communities, there are too many deer because of Climate Change, so the change of vegetation and temperature is causing deer to move into other areas. In other places, it’s the lack of predators that has led to overpopulation…
The Master Communicator's Handbook Page 5
