“Oh… I didn’t realize that.” Clearly her tastes are as strange as her clothes. “That’s amazing.”
She beams at me. “Thank you. I come from a large coven who really thought I should dedicate my time to their stuff, so I’m very happy they allowed me to go down this path instead.”
What path? The path of horribly gaudy clothes? They were probably just trying to keep her from a life of embarrassment.
She gives me a wave. “Sorry! I didn’t mean to start going life story on you! I’m just blabbing! I can tell you have magic too, but I can’t tell what it is.”
I give her a wink. “It’s a secret.”
She blushes. “I do have the problem of talking more than I should.”
“Miles, we can only tell that it’s leading into a basement. The magic is very heavy on the door. Only those who are allowed can open it. I think that unless we break the spell, we’re not going to figure out what’s down there.”
Yes, but if we break the spell, the caster will know and come see what’s up.
“I’ll try this on now,” I say.
“Great!”
I step into the room and close the curtain. Just as I’m pulling the shirt on, Havoc hops inside. “Alright, we’ll watch the place and see if something’s going on,” I whisper.
“I’m sorry, were you speaking? Your shirt is so damn loud, I couldn’t hear your voice over it,” he says, then begins doing his cawing laugh.
“You don’t dig it?” I tease as I turn in the mirror and see myself shine. “You know I have to buy it. This poor lady’s so excited I’m here.”
“Good, I think it suits you. It reflects your sparkling personality.”
“It turns you on, doesn’t it?”
He hops a bit. “Never been more turned on. Especially because I can see my reflection in the rhinestones. And boy, am I sexy.”
I stifle a laugh as he shifts, feathered cloak fluttering around him as he looks down at me. “You’d better not get caught,” I whisper.
“Me? I’m like a whisper in the night. A breath in the air. A cucumber in a bit of squashes.”
“None of that made sense.”
“What also doesn’t make sense is how sexy you look in this outfit,” he says as he runs a finger down my rhinestoned chest. Havoc presses into me, pushing a knee between my legs so I part them. He directs my chin up and runs a thumb over my lips, making me want more of him. Just a taste of his lips will be enough until we get home. He presses into me softly before opening his mouth just enough that his tongue brushes against mine.
I hear a yelp of surprise and jerk back. “What the hell?” I ask.
Havoc shrugs and shifts, so I yank the shirt off and grab mine before stepping out to where the woman is having a staring contest with the cat.
“Is this… a familiar?” she asks in confusion.
“A… cat,” I say.
She raises an eyebrow. “A cat?”
“I love the shirt!” I say as I carry it over to her.
Her expression shifts into pure happiness. “Thank you so much! Is that… do you want to buy it?”
“I’d love to.”
She promptly forgets about Menace, the creepy cat, and merrily rings it up.
I summon two semi-intelligent lesser demons that are shaped like small gargoyles and ask them to keep a watch on the shop. I think they’re more interested in boning each other, but they seem to be doing an adequate job because they let me know every time someone walks in the shop.
My phone rings and I see that it’s them again. At least I’m on the couch this time and not busy with other things.
“Hello?” I say, trying not to show my irritation at getting called for the fifteenth time today. The first time was the mailman, the second was the delivery guy, the third was the witch who owns the place, and on and on. I’ve been trying to get them to understand that it’s okay for normal people to be there.
“Master!” One croaks out. “Master? Master! This stupid thing. Make it work!”
Feeling extra creative, and unable to call them by their true names since that should stay between a mage and a demon, I asked what they wanted to be called. The female picked the name One because she is, and I quote, “Number one,” and the male picked “Popsicle” because he wanted a popsicle.
Semi-intelligent is the key here.
“I’m here.”
“Now… I know you mentioned only calling if there was something alarming.”
“I did.”
One hesitates. “And I might have promptly called about a dog that walked by.”
“You did.”
She hesitates again. “But this time I think it might be something.”
“Okay, what is it?” I ask.
She hems and haws a bit first. “Now, I could be wrong.”
Havoc leans into me. “Them again?”
I nod. “Come on, One. What is it?”
“Will you be mad if I’m wrong?”
“No. So?”
“Popsicle thinks I’m wrong. So we discussed it, and we really don’t know, so I thought it was better safe than sorry and he was like it’s better sorry than safe and then we realized that that made no sense, and I asked him how he could rather be sorry than safe—”
“One, please tell me who entered the building.”
“Oh, a whole group of people! Kind of looked like a cult!”
I sigh as my hand instinctively balls up like I’m wishing to strangle something. “Oh my god. And how long ago was this?” I jump up and wave to Havoc as we rush for the door. Menace chases after us, eager to join in on anything that involves him making things bleed or tearing them up.
“Well… first we thought about it for a bit, then we considered it, and then we debated whether we should call you or not. So… about an hour.”
I groan. “We need to talk about what seems suspicious.”
“Dammit. I told you!” she growls at the other demon.
I sigh but hang up on her and rush after Havoc who is striding toward the front door. We head to the car and just as I’m shutting the door, Menace jumps onto my lap. I still can’t tell if he wants to murder me or love me, so I toss him into the back seat. He promptly crawls back into the front seat and parks his ass on my lap as I drive.
“I can’t tell if that thing likes you or wants to be close so it can stab you without having to move too far,” Havoc says.
“Funnily enough, I was thinking the same thing. I’m also not sure.”
I reach down and pet his ears. He huffs, like he’s annoyed because he’s “not a cat,” but doesn’t move. I think he secretly enjoys it, so I poke at his ear. He swipes at me with a paw, but thankfully, his claws weren’t out or I’m pretty sure Havoc would have tossed him through the window.
Not out the window. Through it.
We reach the little shop and park a short distance away from it before getting out. One, the demon, flies down and lands in front of me. She’s about knee high, phone in a taloned paw.
“There are three outside. Smoking.”
“Ooh, perfect,” I say as I rush past her. We slip around the corner and see the three people—two men and one woman—smoking in silence.
“Let’s get them into the alleyway and knock them out,” I suggest.
“How do we do that?” Havoc asks.
I see that one of the men is playing on their phone, so I nod at it. “Swoop in, grab his phone, and bring it this way.”
“Got it,” he says as he shifts into a raven and leaps into the air. I wait patiently until I hear shouting and the sound of feet rushing this way. Clearly, they’re not happy.
Havoc zips around the corner and shifts, dropping the phone to the ground as the three round the corner. Havoc punches the first square in the face, dropping him like a sack of potatoes.
“Wha…cha!” he shouts as a kick lands. What that means or why he shouted it, I’ll never know. All I do know is he’s enjoying himself if the huge grin is anything to go b
y.
Instead of relying on my magic, which will likely harm the second man, I grab him in a headlock and start choking him. That’s when the woman begins casting a spell. Before she can get it out of her mouth, Menace leaps onto her, scaling up her body as she screams at his claws digging into her. The man I’m hanging on to thrashes and hits me until his arms grow weak and he drops to the ground.
“Don’t murder her!” I yell at Menace as he digs one claw into her forehead and extends his nails like he’s going to claw her face off.
Havoc grabs her and puts her into a chokehold before Menace can proceed with the face disfigurement. Menace hisses, clearly displeased over the lack of a good face skinning.
“I feel… like that was a little overkill, but it might just be me,” I say as I look down at the bleeding trio. They’re just heaps on the ground.
Menace is licking his paws like he’s proud of himself and Havoc is still grinning, clearly pleased.
“Nah, nothing’s ever overkill for us,” Havoc says. “If it was overkill, we would have killed them. Get it? Ha ha!”
I ignore him while wishing I hadn’t gotten it. “Okay. Since we don’t have a third person, we’re going to have to hope no one notices the woman’s gone missing.”
The cat meows like he wants to know our plans.
“I’m putting an illusion on us,” I explain to him. “So Havoc and I will go in looking like these two.”
Menace walks over and sits on the woman’s face, like butthole right on her mouth, and meows again. That’s when I realize what he wants.
I shake my head. “No! I’m not putting an illusion on you! You could screw it all up.”
He growls and extends his dagger claws.
I eye him. “Brute force won’t get you everywhere in life!”
He begins yowling.
“Is… is Master really having a conversation with a cat?” One asks Popsicle.
“Don’t ask,” Havoc says as he sets up two of the bodies, then shoos the cat off and sets up the third.
“Fine.” I jab a finger at the cat. “Don’t fuck this up.”
He’s all cocky as he pads over to my side, tail flicking back and forth. I kneel in front of the first man and examine him so I can get the illusion right. “Havoc… did he have a broken nose before or after you punched him in the face?” I ask.
Havoc stares at him very closely. “It’s not bleeding. I think he already had it.”
I poke it but it doesn’t feel broken. “Are you sure? I mean that fucker’s like a beak and it’s clearly broken.”
“Positive. I remember his tilted beak when I grabbed the phone.”
“How positive?” I ask.
“Ten percent.”
“Out of what?” I demand.
He chuckles then sets a gentle hand on my shoulder. “Trust me, babe.”
“I don’t trust you at all,” I say as I scrutinize the man and then place an illusion on myself so I look just like him. Then I turn to the next one so I can make Havoc look like him. He’s shorter than Havoc, but the taller of the two. The issue with that is that people will see him as the height of the original man. So if they reach for his head, they might feel that something’s off. Honestly, it shouldn’t be a huge deal since people rarely go around patting the tops of heads.
The cat, on the other hand, could be a disaster.
He meows.
“Yeah, I’m thinking about you.”
He lifts up his paw and extends one claw.
The middle one.
“You’re such an asshole,” I say as I make him appear like the woman. I use my magic to tie up the three unconscious people and set my minor demons to watch them as the three of us head toward the door of the shop. “I’m just going to put this out there. This is going to be a disaster.”
“Why?” Havoc asks, sounding like Havoc.
That’s when it hits me. “Ah, shit. I didn’t listen to them speak. I don’t know how to make them sound.”
“I did when they were shouting at me! Your guy sounded like his balls never dropped. Very squeaky. Think like mouse whose balls also never dropped.”
“Splendid.”
“And I sounded sexy. Masculine. Handsome.”
“How do you sound handsome?” I ask.
“Hi, my name is Havoc,” he says, voice low and grumbly.
I stare at him.
He grins at me. “Went to your dick, didn’t it? Speechless.”
The cat, who now looks like a woman, hisses. Literally the woman hisses.
“You can’t talk at all,” I say as I point at Menace. I try to magically modify our voices some to how I think they should sound, but before I can do much more, the door opens.
“What are you three doing? We’re waiting on you!” a woman shouts from the doorway of the shop.
“Here goes disaster,” I say as I head toward them.
Chapter Five
We go inside and through the now open door. Thankfully, the barrier for the door has been opened, otherwise, I might have had to snap it, and that could’ve caused many issues.
We head down the stairs into the bottom floor where about fifteen people of different magical descent linger. I actually recognize two of them. The woman from the shop, who is sitting in the corner looking a little pale and wide-eyed, and a mage named Terrance.
“What happened to your nose?” a woman asks, looking startled.
Dammit, Havoc.
I try to appear calm and normal. “Uh… Broke it.”
That gets everyone’s attention. “You broke it while smoking a cigarette?” the blonde witch asks.
“Tripped. Right on my face. Pow. Snap crackle pop. Broken.” My god, I need to stop talking.
“That’s right,” Havoc says as he walks up looking menacing, or at least trying to, but the body he’s in is nowhere near as menacing as his real body. So he’s got the pose, just not the look. Honestly, he looks a bit ridiculous.
“Eugene, what happened to your limp?” Terrance, the mage I know, asks.
Of course he had a fucking limp. I give Havoc wide eyes, praying he’ll pull this one off. He’s a smart man, he can do this.
“Some good ol’ drugs,” Havoc says.
“Like… Tylenol?” a succubus asks.
All right, drugs are good. Drugs make pain go away.
“Cocaine,” Havoc supplies.
Drugs are NOT good!
Eyes get wide. There’s whispered talk, and I know we’ve ruined our chances.
“Bloody hell, you’re on the coke, Eugene?” a man exclaims.
“He’s such a joker!” I add.
They all turn to me. “Eugene hates jokes,” a male witch says.
Of course he does.
“Eugene, you just went through rehab, and you’re already back to the coke?” Terrance asks.
Oh my god. Of course Havoc can pull this off while I’m floundering like an idiot. I want to just fade off into the background and let Havoc take the lead role. That is, until I see Menace as the woman licking his paw. Visually, the woman is just standing there licking her hand before rubbing her spit-slicked hand all over her hair.
“Menace!” I hiss.
He pauses, tongue out, hand frozen.
“Menace?” Terrance asks.
I quickly look around as I try to find a way to save this situation. “Yes! Menaces everywhere!”
Kill me now.
“Our buddy here told me he wasn’t feeling too good,” Havoc says as he pats my shoulder.
I scowl at him.
“You know how simple he is,” Havoc says. “Broke his nose tripping over his own feet! Should’ve seen it!”
Everyone’s laughing now, and I’m contemplating punching Havoc.
Havoc beams at me. “That’s alright. You’re one of us.”
I glare at him but he’s giving me a huge smile.
“So what are we up to now?” Havoc asks as he rubs his hands together.
“You’re awfully eager.”
“It’s the cocaine talking,” he says as he looks around.
I look over at a magic circle beneath some of their feet as they begin to step away from it. I can finally see enough of it to examine it.
“Let’s begin,” Terrance says.
Everyone heads over to the circle and I push Menace between us so we’ll be the only ones holding furry paws instead of hands.
“Everyone’s good? Everyone’s ready?” Terrance asks as he kneels and everyone follows suit.
I examine the circle. It’s some type of summoning circle, but it’s hard for me to possibly recognize every type of summoning circle when there are thousands of them. I see the symbol for summon, earth, and soul, but I’m not quite sure what they’re summoning. It’s not a demon, I can tell that much. I’m very familiar with demon summoning seeing as I currently have four demons summoned myself. Most mages can’t have more than one, let alone four. And two of mine are high level.
I eye the others as they gather in a ring just outside the summing circle and take each other’s hands. Feeling awkward, I reach over and take Menace’s paw. It’s furry and fluffy and hiding death daggers that I’m really hoping he doesn’t extend. Havoc reaches for the other paw but Menace refuses to give it to him.
“Something wrong, Yuna?” the blonde witch says.
The witch from the shop looks nervous and now a little green. I have my doubts she wants to be here, telling me that some of these people are probably from her coven. Maybe they own this building she runs her shop out of.
Menace grudgingly hands Havoc his hand/paw, claws aimed toward him, telling me that they’re extended, like he thinks it’ll keep Havoc from grabbing his paw. Havoc leans over.
“I will make kitty noodle soup out of your hairy ass,” he growls.
“Don’t worry, he won’t. He doesn’t understand the concept of cooking. But I can’t promise you he won’t try,” I say.
Menace gives in.
Terrance smiles at his brain-dead cult. “Alright, now let’s begin the summoning.”
I look over at Havoc as I question how far we should let this go. Do I stop them now? Do I see what they’re up to?
Havoc gives me a look. Now we’re looking at each other with some silent discussion going on between us with neither of us really knowing what to do. The thing is, at this point, I don’t know if they’re doing anything illegal. If I stop them, there’s nothing I can do, and they’ll just go elsewhere and do it again. So I decide to at least wait and see what they’re cooking up. I’m pretty confident that I can stop the spell at any point if I need to, but I’m not going to aid them with my magic.
Familiar Beginnings Page 5
