Oh, I’ve tried. Tried harder than men like me should admit to. I’ve failed to woo so many women. I have fucked so many women.
And, I have killed many women.
I will never tell anyone I’m anything but a monster. That’s all I have room to be, and I don’t play pretend. I am too fucking old for that. I was too old for that shit when I was eight.
And even though I do like my drinking and even my drugs on occasion, I will never blame my behavior on those things. Vices are vices, and decisions are decisions. And my decisions, they come from the darkest part of my heart, if I even have one.
I don’t know if I was born with my heart many sizes too small like the Grinch or if it shrank every time I knew that my family didn’t really love me. I don’t know if this world ruined it even more once I found out the way things work was to take what I wanted, and that was all the world was about.
It’s all about fucking making a way for yourself. I’m okay with that now. I’ve accepted it and want to go with the flow. That doesn’t mean that every little boy doesn’t hold this little light of hope inside them throughout their childhood which has to die for them to discover the man they were meant to be.
And I’ve been dead a hell of a long time.
“Well, I think we should celebrate being here in this lovely city. I don’t want to be out too late tonight. But I suppose we could hop to a couple of the best clubs. I heard they’re excellent.”
The beaming look on Isaac’s face tells me he is ready to party. And I bet I can convince him to stay out longer than he thinks he’s going to.
“Let’s get the fuck out of here, then.”
Both of us go outside and have our driver pull up the car and get in the backseat of the black vehicle with illegally tinted windows. If someone pulls us over, it’s not like they’d be around for very long anyway. I’d handle it, even if Isaac doesn’t want to. Even if he thinks that the police have their time and place. Me? I have no qualms about eliminating whoever is in my way, including law enforcement which has better things to do than fucking harass me about some damn windows.
We pull up to the first club, and I go to get out of the car, but Isaac stops me. He looks at me like he has something important to say, and I don’t know if I’m in the mood... “Before I get too drunk or try to, there’s something I should tell you. And a favor I have to ask. I know you’re not going to understand, but I hope as my brother, you will help me.” See, that’s where Isaac could be a good leader. All because he is so fucking manipulative. He always has just the right words to say to make you feel guilty for ever thinking ill of him. For ever wanting what he has. A method that, for right now, will allow him to continue talking. Continue breathing.
“I couldn’t find you to be a part of the meeting, but Pavel and I sat down with a lawyer tonight. We drew up a contract. He should be getting Elena to sign too at any minute, but not like it matters. Ion and Mariana will go ahead and approve as well as force it on her if they must. You know how they want all of us married off. And we’ve all decided that it would be best, and most romantic, if we get married while still here in Rome. Tonight.”
Never fucking mind that whole still breathing thing. But he continues, and I get even more fucking pissed the more he says to me.
“What the fuck does any of this have to do with me?” I rage.
“Brother,” he stops me, looking at me with sympathy. Something I am not fucking okay with. “I know that you wanted this. I know that you may always want this. Trust me when I say that you’re better off this way. I think you have some great things ahead of you, and you’re going to be my right hand man in this. And hey, to be honest with you, Elena is probably going to be just as fucked up about this as we are and need satisfying in a way that I can’t give her. I think I will have to be honest with her once we say I do, about certain preferences I have, and maybe that’s something you can help us with. It’s just a marriage. You know the Clans; that doesn’t mean as much as you think it means. It’s just about power. It’s just about protection. Nothing else. You can help me protect her. And I want you to be my best man. That being said, I need your help. I need you to keep me sober enough to be able to go through with this wedding, and I was hoping that I could get you to go pick up the marriage certificate and a set of rings for us? I think you’d be better at picking those out. Besides, I think there’s something about the best man hanging onto the ring.” He smiles at me like it’s so fucking amazing he just asked me, his twin brother and a Clan member in my own right, to be his errand boy. And that was after offering for me to be his wife’s side piece.
We have plenty of people that could do this job for us, including the driver that’s sitting here, waiting for us to get out of the fucking car. Conversations like this whole thing just ruin the mood for the night. Maybe he knew it would do that. Maybe he doesn’t want me to party with him at all.
And here I was thinking that sometime after we had a few drinks enough to stomach it, I would bring up the Bădescu sisters. Tell him that they were in town and sitting right across the street from the event. Probably planning their next move. I mean, he is the Clan leader. It is his job to know and do something about it. But between this, and the fact that our little sister, Annamaria, has bigger kahunas than Isaac, I’m not even going to fucking bother. Not only can I use this to my advantage, but I don’t see him being able to deal with these women anyway. They’re too good at what they do. And they’ve had years and years in the dark hole of Eastern Europe to plan their revenge in order to kill us all.
And with Isaac at the helm, they just might succeed. Time for me to be the hero.
“Why don’t you go ahead and head in there; I’ll go ahead and run those errands you want. You’re the one that deserves the party tonight. I can get my drink on afterward and maybe some of the Clan women might want to attend – and then attend to me once I come back to the room tonight or something. I will handle everything. I’ll get you your own room. I’ll get everyone that needs to be there. I’ll even grab Annamaria so that she can be a part of the ceremony. I don’t think that Elena has anyone with her to be the maid of honor, anyway.” I tried to put the best smile that I can muster on my face. Something that looks genuine, but I don’t know if I’m that great of an actor.
I must be, because he accepts that and gets out of the car, thanking me. I don’t know how I’m going to pull this off, but I do know I don’t think he will be thanking me by the end of the night.
I wait until I know he’s inside, and I give the driver his instructions for the night. All the places that I need to go to get the shit done.
The rings first. Then, I start calling around and making sure that a select few Clan members can be there to witness this. This is going to be a more intimate event, just in case. Next, I call the hotel we are staying at, specifically the ritzy joint known as Hotel Eden. It is probably the most beautifully elegant hotel in Rome, and the best part is they have this awesome venue that for the right price they’re willing to open up late tonight. A huge library with all kinds of hidden doors, including a secret bar. Everything will be the perfect place to see the look on Isaac’s face when he realizes that this may not turn out as planned.
Lastly, is getting the marriage license. It’s rather easy to find someone that’s willing to meet me at this time of night and sign it and extradite the process. Only, I just might have told him that the name that’s supposed to be on it is mine.
Whoops.
When I’m done, I go back to the hotel where I text my brother and guests to meet me.
I lead them straight to the venue that is being prepared for us, called La Libreria; the special lounge with the secret bar.
He is stunned, looking around at how beautiful and intimate it is. He’s probably thinking that it’ll be romantic for Elena to experience her wedding day like this, even though it’s so fast and clearly not what she wants.
And I just keep fucking grinning like the cat that ate the canary. Because
in the end, I’m going to be the brother that wins. And I don’t care who I have to betray to make it happen.
Chapter Five
Elena
The clock is about to strike midnight, and my heart is racing. I am sequestered here in the hotel room that will become the honeymoon suite after I say ‘I do’. Isaac has prepared everything for us. Or rather, his servants or possibly his family have. I don’t really know how that works.
What I do know is when I came back from leaving those two sisters at the café, Ivana and Galina, I was met with news I didn’t quite expect. While I did expect my father to arrange a marriage, I didn’t exactly expect him to want to have the wedding tonight. But somehow, he and Isaac have cooked up this whole thing where we are eloping tonight. And then I flit off with him to Spain tomorrow. So, no chance to say goodbye to my old life, myself, or any friends I have back home.
I’m sweating bullets and glad for more than one reason that the dress I wear is black. I don’t know how I got away with it getting through my father who went dress shopping with me, but one of the few designer dresses we could find at a boutique willing to open specifically for us for this event tonight, was black. Half sleeve, black tulle, with a few red, gray, and white flowers. The back is almost completely open, and I look like the harlot, the other woman at a funeral for an elderly rich man.
It’s fitting, really. For the same reason that I wore black to this event in the first place, I wear black to my wedding tonight. Though, the meaning may ring truer this time.
It doesn’t matter that I’m nervous. It doesn’t matter that I’m not ready to give myself to this man who doesn’t even like women, just to consummate the marriage contract. It doesn’t even matter that I won’t get to see my own bed anymore.
Because before the wedding is over, I’m going to take the hairpin that is holding my dark curls up in a beautiful updo, and I will shove it straight through his eyeball. It’s going to go through to his brain, and that is going to be the end of Isaac Ungur.
It’s going to be the end of my life being taken over by my father and other people. This is the fucking end of men telling me what to do with my life.
And there’s no reason to worry about me having the balls to do this, because I know I have those. It’s just about failure. Failure to hit the right place, failure to have enough strength to get it all the way through. But I made sure I found the sharpest hairpins I could at the store. And if I have to break one apart for good measure, then, hell, I will.
But the groom won’t be surviving the night. There will be no marriage bed, no hotel suite. And I seriously fucking doubt the Clans are going to do anything about it. Because if they did, they would have to admit all the other bad things they do just to get the porci involved.
So, it will be a new life for me. And I will finally be free.
There is a knock on my door; my father, no doubt. I open it and frown at him. Just because I don’t intend to have to actually go through with this doesn’t mean I’m not going to give my father hell for putting me through this to begin with. He’s going to know my complete displeasure before I actually go through with this.
I wrap my arm around his, but I also walk as slow as possible on purpose. We’re going to be late. My father wanted to marry us at the stroke midnight in La Libreria; the room that has been rented inside the hotel that Luca and Isaac are staying at. It is a library, but one meant to be a venue full of secret little rooms and corridors. It’s almost like a library and speakeasy in one. This will turn out well for me, considering there’s probably a good way out through this place. It’s probably pretty secluded compared to the other venues inside this hotel. In fact, if I heard right, it is in the basement.
In Romanian, I have let my father know my distaste for this. I don’t call him out completely because I will do that the minute that Isaac is dead instead. But he will know that it makes me sad that he wants me to leave now without saying goodbye. He wants to just send me off to be somebody else’s problem.
A long walk doesn’t last long enough, and I find myself being led into the room, ushered to the sound of the wedding march.
How boring and typical for an event like this. At least go for something unique, maybe dark, considering both of us are heading into a forced marriage.
Down the aisle, I look up at the groom to be. Isaac is particularly stunning in his designer suit. If I’m not mistaken, I believe it’s an Armani. And instead of the traditional black and white, it is a charcoal color. I don’t know if it’s because he couldn’t find anything else on short notice or simply to go against the grain, considering all of this is nontraditional.
He smiles at me and puts on a good act as if I am beautiful and amazing. He is trying so hard to make this a good night for me.
The library is beautiful, and I can’t deny that. If I were to have a wedding in Rome, this would be a good place for it. But his demeanor, his fakeness just serves to make me angrier. If it would kill him fast enough, I would just wrap my hands around his fucking neck and choke him to death. Even if my father is the mastermind behind this, it isn’t right of him either. My father may have begged for the marriage contract, but he accepted it, knowing he doesn’t even like women. He doesn’t fuck with women at all if what I hear is right. So, why be supportive of this? Why is he even pretending?
His brother and I would have a better time of it than me and him, but his brother is useless because he’s not the Clan leader. And none of it matters. I’m going to wash my hands of every person in this room within the next 30 minutes.
I get to the end of the aisle, my father goes through the whole traditional thing; giving me away, my hand placed into Isaac’s from my fathers’ before he takes his place in front of us to also perform the nuptials.
I face Isaac in my black dress, my face stoic as my father drones on and on in a mix of Romanian and English and even a little bit of Italian about the life I’ve had, the life he has led, and about how our life will be full of a faithful love for each other.
Ha! No way would a gay man be faithful to me. I wouldn’t be faithful to him either. The result is a fucking joke. If I wasn’t waiting for the right moment, I would just say so.
He finally gets to the part where he asks if anyone objects, and I swear I hear a scoff coming from one of the Clan men that has been brought to witness this wedding. Apparently, it’s some kind of law that these mafia people have that one of them has to be present. This one’s name is Stefan. Dalca, I believe.
Looking away from Isaac for a moment, the resemblance between him and Luca really is uncanny, but I can still tell them apart. Luca has this bad boy look about him at all times. He seems totally real, even if he’s probably a dick. Isaac always has this appearance of being sociable and kind and all these good things that he’s clearly not. Because if he was, he never would’ve accepted this, or he would at least have asked my permission before basically forcing me to sign the contract.
Nobody speaks up and protests, and so my father drags on, until he gets to the vows. Isaac goes first, luckily, to build the drama. He promises to love and cherish me forever and blah blah blah. All lies, so it doesn’t make me feel guilty. I don’t shed a tear and even pretend like I feel something about this. Why would I? This is not my wedding day. Not the one I should be having.
I wait until it’s my turn to say my vows. My father tells me to repeat after him, and that’s when I pretend to have a moment of hesitation. I put my head down and wipe my eyes as if there are tears. Not tears because this is my wedding day and it’s beautiful and overwhelmingly emotional, but tears because I don’t want to get married to someone I don’t know. I reach up and fidget with my hairpin. At first, it appears like a nervous tic, like I am thinking.
Luckily, my father and Isaac are both gracious enough to wait for me.
“I don’t know about this,” I mumble. “I don’t know if I can go through with this.”
Then, I pull the hairpin out so fast, it rips several strands of
hair along with it. With all my strength, my fist wraps around it, and I shoved the pointy end straight through his left eye. A pained scream echoes through the library.
Everything goes silent for a moment as he holds his bloodied, useless, blind eye and collapses to the ground, and then his brain shuts down, and he is dead.
The man I have decided is no longer my father suddenly gasps in a delayed reaction and jumps back, looking at me, horrified. “My daughter, what have you done? Why have you done this? He was to be your husband. He is a prominent member of the Clans and the church. What will everyone say? What will happen to you now?”
“I’ll tell you what the fuck happens to me now father,” I emphasize the last word so he understands exactly how I feel about him. I’m about to spew all the things I wanted to say all these years that he has sworn he’s taken good care of me and been this amazing single father when really, he trapped me between four walls of some kind and called it good. “I’m going to walk out of here, and I’m going to live my life the way I fucking want to live my life, and you’re not going to be in it. None of these people in this room are going to be in it because I’m going to live my own life. I’m going to go back to my friends, I want to do the things I want to do. All my life you’ve put me in a prison. Whether it was a Catholic school, or your rules and ideals, or the four walls that was the room I grew up in, that’s what you did. You never really raised me. I had to raise myself. I saw terrible things. I don’t know why you claim to be this upstanding Christian man when really you’re just as bad as all these people in this room, maybe even worse because you’re doing this to your own daughter. At least all these people are honest about the fact that they are fucking out of their minds. Besides, you wanted me to be a part of the Clans, well, I acted like I was part of the Clans. I took what I wanted, and I killed a man that was going to put me in the new prison. Now I am free. So, you’re going to let me go.”
Heretic: The Clans Book Ten Page 4
