“Placing a bet or betting on you?”
“Both.”
“Seb, do not be daft, I have full confidence in your abilities on a horse. I have seen you ride, for goodness sake. Aside from the fact that you are my husband—who else would I bet on? And why are you not mad about him unseating you?”
He shrugged. “It was a minor rub. There is nothing to be upset about.”
“A minor rub that could have gotten you killed. That hoof missed your head by a hair.”
“So you were worried for me?”
“Of course I was.” Her head cocked at him, contemplating. “That is what you want to hear, is it not? That I was worried for you?”
His head bowed, his brown eyes slicing into her. “Possibly.”
Brianna stared at him for a long moment.
She could lie. She should lie.
Instead, her mouth opened. “My heart stopped, Seb. Everything stopped. I would not have thought it until that moment, but my heart stopped when you fell…and rolled…and then that horse went over you. I…” She shook her head, her eyes closing as she forced down the lump in her throat. “I cannot describe it…I did not breathe for minutes.”
Her eyes still closed, his lips suddenly on hers made her jump. But the instant heat of him, the power of him calmed her, affirmed that he was standing next to her, alive and well.
He pulled away. Soon. Much too soon.
One look at her face and he chuckled. “I would continue, but we are about to become a spectacle.”
Brianna took a deep breath, looking around, her anger still not sated. “Well, I still would like to yell at that fool jockey. You may be walking, but I did lose a pretty coin from it.”
He laughed, loud and hearty as he pulled her even tighter into him. “Help me hobble over to Lord Bayton and then prop me up so I do not look weak. That showing of Red Swallow—at least until I was tossed—was hopefully enough to convince him of the mare’s worth.”
They started walking, and Brianna was surprised at how very much weight Sebastian was putting on her. But as long as her spine stayed straight, she could handle it.
“I think you could have every bone in your body broken and you still would not look weak, Seb.”
He squeezed her shoulders. “Thank you for saying so. Let us hope Bayton agrees. And if the horse’s performance was not enough, I might have to leverage your charms to convince him.”
Brianna guffawed. “My charms? I think you know full well how my charms lack.”
“On the contrary, I saw you speaking with Lord Bayton for some time before the race. He looked quite interested in what you were saying, and I happen to know Bayton has very little interest in talking to females—unless they are mares. He is of the distinct belief that the fairer sex should be docile, dumb, and mute.”
“I gathered that about him. But he was actually quite pleasant to me, and after a few moments we were talking about the horses you and the duke have at Notlund. And then, of course, we spoke of his horses.” Her head tilted, thinking. “Possibly, I can help. I did just spend a half hour listening to all of his views on horses and the care of them.”
“I can see your mind spinning rampant, my wife.”
“Luhaunt.” Lord Bayton waved his hand in the air, making his way out of the edge of the crowd, his cane quick through the dirt.
“Luhaunt.” Slightly winded, Lord Bayton stopped in front of Brianna and Sebastian. “I dare say, man, your wife is far faster than that horse that trampled you.”
Sebastian chuckled, tightening his grip on Brianna’s shoulders as he leaned on her. “That she is. She was rather quick to me.”
“That she was.”
“The privilege of a newlywed,” Sebastian said, looking down at Brianna with a twinkle in his eye. His focus went to Lord Bayton. “How did you enjoy the race, Lord Bayton?”
“A fine race—until the end.” Both hands clasping his gold-tipped cane, he nodded. “A shame about the end. I would have liked to see your mare finish the hill. But I trust you are unhurt as you are walking about?”
“Nothing for concern. Just a minor tumble.” Sebastian motioned to his left. “And there—my man has Red Swallow now. I presume you would like to take a closer look at her? Shall we walk and discuss?”
Lord Bayton looked from Sebastian to Brianna. “Only if your wife will accompany us. I find her perspective on your horses very interesting.”
Sebastian smiled. “I dare not let her leave my side.”
“Good man, Luhaunt.” Bayton slapped his palm on Sebastian’s shoulder. “Good man.”
{ Chapter 12 • Earl of Destiny }
“I am concerned about Lord Bayton.” Clicking the door closed, Brianna moved back into the room and shoved the table in front of Sebastian to the side, its four legs scraping along the rough floor.
Hands on her hips, she surveyed the private back room of the tavern, then grabbed the wooden chair Lord Bayton had occupied. “He was quite sauced when he stumbled out of here.”
“The man can handle his liquor, and his driver will take care of him,” Sebastian said, watching Brianna as he leaned against one of the cherubs carved into the high wooden back of the long bench they had both been sitting on. “I am more concerned that he will forget our bargain, come morning. A bargain that would not have been possible without your gentle persuasion, my wife.”
She glanced at him, pulling the chair across the floor, and setting it sideways in front of his knees. “Let me try my luck, then, in persuading you to put your leg up. We are alone in here now, the door is closed, and I have been watching your ankle throb—through your boot, mind you—for the past hour.”
She bent to grab his right leg, lifting it and setting it on the chair. Sebastian thought for a moment to resist, but then relented. Brianna pampering him was foreign, but he was enjoying it.
“And I can see how tight your shoulders are, my wife.” He snatched her wrist, pulling her down to sit next to him on the bench. “You must be in pain after holding me up all day.”
His hands went to her shoulders before she could scoot back on the bench. Kneading deep into the muscles, his fingers worked her shoulders, her back, and he could see goosebumps rise along her neck as he brushed aside the tendrils escaping from her upsweep.
“You do realize any success I had with Bayton was due to you, Bree?”
“Me?” She turned her head slightly to look at him. “I merely used what I knew of him to persuade him that you were of like mind.”
“Yes. And I am almost afraid of your delicate cunning.”
She straightened her head, soft smile on her lips as she leaned into his fingers. “I do not know if that is a compliment.”
“It is in this situation—and in most, as far as I have seen. You use your cunning to help your family—it is not used for evil.”
She chuckled. “Well, thank you.”
“I am just happy I am family—forced or not—and can benefit thusly.” The back of her neck so delectable, he leaned forward, kissing the middle divot.
Straightening, Sebastian watched the fire in the deep hearth across from them as Brianna’s head fell to the side. He could feel her muscles under his fingers relax, turning to jelly.
“Hmmm. When you are doing this there is no pain—no pain at all.” Her words tumbled out, slow, lazy.
Sebastian stared at the bit of her profile he could see from his angle. Her eyes were closed, face relaxed. “You, my wife, are a marvel.”
The smile touching her lips slowly faded, and he could see her mind start to work. He kneaded harder into the muscles lining her neck, trying to stave off her thoughts.
“What do you want of me, Seb?” She asked the question without emotion, without moving. Just words sneaking into the room.
His hands stopped.
Her eyes popped open. “Did I say that out loud?”
“Yes. And I have been nothing but honest with you, Brianna.” His voice went low.
She straightened h
er head, turning to look at him on the bench.
“I have been honest about my intentions. Honest about what I want in life. I want you. I want to know you. Fully and completely.”
“And that must include my past?”
“Yes.”
Her head shook, her hands falling into her lap. “You are not about to let that be an unknown, are you, Seb?”
His head tilted to the side. “For now I am. Until you are ready.”
“And if I never am?”
Sebastian shrugged. “I am a patient man, Brianna.”
Head dropping, she looked down at her fingernails pressing into her thumbs for long seconds. Her blue eyes came up to him, challenge clear in them. “What about you, Seb—your past? You never speak of your past either.” She took a deep breath. “I am fighting myself to want to trust you, Seb, but you left me so quickly at Notlund—you ran. And that is what Wynne said about you. You are the wind. You are always running. Why?”
“Wynne said that?”
“They both did. The duke said this is the longest you have ever stayed in one spot—up until you left a fortnight ago.”
Blast it. Wynne, sure, she would share such things—but Rowen as well? Sebastian scratched the back of his neck, his eyes shifting from Brianna to the fire.
“My past is open for exploration, but yours is not, Seb? Truly? You ask me to trust you with things I cannot bear to dredge up, yet you cannot tell me what is in your past. Why do you not stay in one place? Why do you refuse to keep a real home—a place that is yours alone?”
His eyebrow cocked at her. For all he wanted to know of her past, he wasn’t sure that he wanted to bare light to his own.
Her left hand slipped from her lap, landing on his thigh. “Tell me.”
Still within reach on the table, Sebastian moved forward to grab his glass of brandy, drinking half of it before he leaned back on the carved bench once more.
“My past?”
She nodded.
His eyes went to the fire as he fought down the crushing need to leave. The demanding urgency to get on his horse and move on from this place. But he knew it instantly—it would mean moving on from Brianna. She would never trust him if he left her again. And that, he could not have.
“I had a home once, Brianna. A true home. Father, mother, older brother.” He stopped, downing the remainder of the glass, and then looked at her. “You know we were on the continent, in the wars together, Rowe and I?”
“Yes.”
“When we came back to England, I stepped off the ship, expecting my family. Someone. Every man around me was greeted by someone. Mothers, sisters, children, fathers, cousins. Someone. Tears. Hugs. Laughter.” He shrugged. “But there was not a soul for me. It had been years, yes, since I had been on English soil, but there was no one. So I made my way to our townhouse, expecting to find them there, at least my parents—it was in the middle of the season, and they never missed the season. But the place was empty—only a maid I had never met.”
Brianna’s right hand silently joined her left on his thigh, giving the slightest caress.
Sebastian’s eyes closed, his head shaking. “A complete stranger—a nervous girl with a lisp and a twitchy eye—was the one to tell me my father was dead and that my brother had died in the war.”
“Your brother? But he was heir to the earldom, he would not have been allowed near the fighting.”
“No. No he was not. He was never supposed to leave England. But that would not have stopped Robert. He came after me and then died on the continent, and I never even knew he was killed—a full year passed, and I never knew.”
“What happened to him?”
“Our father was dying—consumption—and my mother sent Robert to find me. My father wanted to see me, and Robert was going to give him that. He was never supposed to be near any battles. Never in harm’s way.”
His eyes drifted to the fire. “It was stupid—he died in some skirmish over a bridge that meant absolutely nothing to either side. He was only a day behind me.” Sebastian drew in a shaking breath. “One day. And I never even knew.”
“What happened to Robert is not your fault, Seb.”
His look snapped to her. “No? My mother would disagree. She never wanted me to leave in the first place. Begged me not to go. But I was the second son and I had so much to prove.” His voice slowed. “Such a need to carve out my own way. She begged, and begged, and begged. But I left. When I found her at our estate in Suffolk, she blamed me for all of it. For leaving, for Robert’s death. Even for my father’s—his will to live deserted him after Robert died. All of it was my fault. She made me very well aware of that fact, and then demanded I leave and never come back.”
“But it has been years since you returned, surely—”
“She still refuses to see me. I have made the attempt several times. The last time I saw her…there was so much hate. She once loved me—adored me—she would have done anything for me. But the last time—there was nothing there—nothing but hate.”
Brianna’s hands tightened on his leg. “But it is not right—you lost so much and then for her to blame you for all of it—it is unfathomable unfairness.”
“Unfair? I was the selfish one. I was the one that left. So I have come to accept it as a cruel twist of fate that I am of the living, after everything I survived in the war, and they are of the dead. I have had to.”
He set the empty glass down next to him on the bench before looking to her. “Do you not see, Bree? I had everything. A family that loved me. A home. A mother that adored me. A proud father. A brother that was my partner in everything. And gone. Just like that” —he snapped his fingers— “gone. Everything I was. Everything I knew and loved. Gone.”
A tear slipped from the corner of Brianna’s eye, sliding down her cheek. Sebastian watched it, wanting to wipe it away but afraid to touch her.
Unable to watch his pain reflected in her face, his eyes moved to the fireplace to stare at the dancing flames. “So I left. I started moving and have not stopped. And I have never wanted a home since then. Never wanted to settle in one place. Never wanted a wife.”
He had to force his eyes to leave the glowing embers and look at Brianna.
“Not until you, Bree. Not until you.”
Her blue eyes solid on him, she took a deep breath. “And I asked you why you ran from Notlund. I am so sorry, Seb. I did not know.”
“I could not stay and chance you hating me, Bree. So I left. It was all I could think to do.”
“No. No more.” Her hand went to his cheek, her palm rubbing along the stubble. “I understand. I do.”
Her hand dropped from his face and she went to her feet. For a moment, Sebastian thought she would leave the room. Leave him. But then she turned to him, pulling up the middle of her skirts as she brought her leg up, straddling him. She settled onto his lap, her shins on the bench as she scooted forward until her chest was touching him.
Both of her hands came up, capturing his face, her clear blue eyes intense on him. “I understand. But do not leave me like that again, Seb. Ever.”
He gave her one nod. “I will not.”
She leaned forward, her lips meeting his. Her mouth opened to him without any provocation, her tongue slipping out, melding with his. Her lips sweet, he took her, hungry, needing to feel her, be part of her, be more than just himself.
Her hands dropped from his face and Sebastian grabbed her about the waist, thinking she was to escape him. But she made no motion to stop the kiss, instead, stripping off her riding jacket and setting loose the pearl buttons down the front of her silk habit shirt.
Her hands busy, she did not leave his mouth, deepening the kiss, taking his lips between her teeth, teasing with her tongue. His hands moving along her back, Sebastian helped her shirt disappear and shimmied down her short stays and chemise, freeing her chest.
Brianna leaned forward, her fingers wrapping around his head as she offered her right breast to his mouth, her voice heat
ed. “Kiss me, Seb. Here. Everywhere.”
He needed no further invitation, taking her nipple into his mouth, harsh, ravaging with every breathless rumble from her chest. One nipple satisfied, he moved to the other, continuing the onslaught. Her fingers deep in his hair, she held him fast, hard to her skin as her hips gyrated on his lap.
The sudden hand around his cock stunned him. He hadn’t even noticed Brianna unbuttoning his breeches.
Hard, straining for her, he let her fingers move along him for a few glorious seconds before he pulled away from her chest, realizing they had already gone too far.
He looked up at her face, her lips, red and bruised, her blue eyes smoldering as she looked down at him. Her hair had come undone, the long glossy curls falling around his head, hiding them from the world.
“Not here, Bree.”
“Here.”
“The door—”
“Did I mention I locked it?”
A smile, straight from the bowels of debauchery crossed his face. “Temptress.”
“Yes.”
She curled down to him, her mouth capturing his just as she lifted her skirts and her hand guided him through her folds, deep into her.
Sebastian nearly exploded at the tightness surrounding him, but he held. This was far too delicious to end overly soon.
She pulled up, tugging at his shirt, pulling it over his head. It gave him just enough time to gain control of his body. He wasn’t about to let Brianna have all the control, to leave her unsatisfied.
Her hands going to his chest, she lifted herself, then slid down slowly on him. Twice more, and her head fell back, deep moans exhaling from her chest.
Sebastian grabbed a nipple in his teeth, rolling his tongue on it as he yanked up on her skirts, finding his way through the cloth to her skin. Fingers splaying along her hip, his thumb went inward, diving to her core, circling the nubbin.
A scream, and her body convulsed at the touch. Sebastian gave a savage chuckle. His thumb sped.
But Brianna was not about to go easily. She looked down at him, challenge in her blue eyes as she increased her own pace, gliding up and down. Harsh, demanding with every stroke. Taking him to the edge of abandon and then thrusting downward.
Lord of Fates: A Complete Historical Regency Romance Series (3-Book Box Set) Page 43