by Wolf, Bree
In this one regard, however, Louisa was inferior. She had always known it, and now Lord Barrington’s words had confirmed what she had always known to be true.
Never would she forgive him for this off-hand remark.
Never.
Never again would she be able to look at him and not remember this crushing feeling of loss and disappointment.
To be considered wanting.
To not be worthy of another.
To be inferior.
Chapter One
A Particular Woman
Windmere Park, England, December 1801 (or a variation thereof)
About one and a half years later
Snow had draped a thick blanket over the world, perfectly fitting for Lord Archibald’s annual Christmas house party. Now, there would not only be singing, parlor games and mistletoe kisses, but also outdoor activities, such as ice-skating and sleigh rides.
Phineas Hawke, Viscount Barrington, had never much cared for these seasonal affairs. He had often remained in London and amused himself with like-minded gentlemen, who preferred card games to parlor games and did not mind losing the occasional coin.
This year, though, was different.
This year, Phineas had decided to attend Lord Archibald’s house party for one very particular reason.
Or rather because of one very particular woman.
“How are you, Phin?” Anne Thatcher, his younger brother’s childhood friend, asked as she and her two cousins, accompanied by their elderly grandmother, alighted from their carriage.
As far as Phineas knew, the Whickertons attended Lord Archibald’s house party every year without fail. Why only the two sisters and their grandmother—aside from their cousin Anne—disembarked from the single carriage standing by the front stoop, he did not know.
Beside him, Phineas felt his brother tense. It would seem Tobias had been persuaded to attend for very much the same reason as Phineas himself.
The reason was a woman.
Fortunately, not the same woman who had moved Phineas. As different as he and his brother were, they had always been loyal to a fault.
Tobias greeted the dowager Lady Whickerton with a formal bow. “I’m delighted you are in attendance as well.” His gaze moved to Anne and lingered, and he seemed to have all but forgotten what to say. Then, however, he abruptly redirected his attention back to the old lady eyeing him with amused curiosity. “Do you remember my brother, Lady Whickerton?”
To Phineas’ delight, the old woman chuckled devilishly. “Of course, the wicked one.” Her watchful eyes seized him up. “Have you acquired manners since last we met?”
Phineas had to admit he rather liked the dowager. “I thought I had,” he laughed, “though, I’m afraid I might have misplaced them once again. I’ll inform you immediately should I succeed in locating them.”
The old lady chortled, her pale eyes lighting up with glee. “A wicked one, indeed.” Then she turned toward the front hall, leaning heavily upon her walking stick. “Give me a head start, ladies,” she told the three young women. “I’m certain you’ll catch up with me at the landing.”
Phineas had to admit that the dowager possessed the kind of humor he appreciated most; a spark of which he often saw in Lady Louisa. If only she had not come to loathe the very sight of him.
His gaze moved to her, took note of the dark glare in those enchanting green eyes and then moved on to settle on Anne. “Little Annie,” he greeted her, finding villainous delight in the way his dear brother tensed beside him. Merely friends, most certainly! “How long has it been? Ten? Twenty years? I must say I hardly recognized you.”
Shaking her head at him, Anne smiled that sweet, dazzling smile that had no doubt been complicit in stealing his brother’s heart. “How are you, Phin?” she asked, ignoring his lacking manners.
Grinning rather mischievously at the woman Tobias loved with an ardent fervor—judging from the way his eyes had narrowed into slits—Phineas teased, “I am utterly fine now that you’re here, Annie. I must say I missed you dearly.”
Tobias looked ready to murder him.
Phineas wanted to chuckle for his brother had yet to confirm his intentions to wed his lovely friend. In fact, Tobias had gone to great lengths to prove that they were merely that, friends.
It had been a long time since Phineas had heard such nonsense!
Anne shook her head at him, smiling. “Are you ever serious, Phin? A man of your age should have learned to comport himself, should he not?”
Phineas frowned. “Are you calling me old?”
“No, simply immature.”
He laughed, “That, I can live with.”
Out of the corner of his eye, Phineas glanced at Lady Louisa. Her strawberry blond curls glistened warmly in the bright winter sun. Her dark green eyes, though, seemed to be on the brink of shooting lightning bolts…his way, no less.
Not that he was surprised!
Still, Phineas could not say why Lady Louisa had come to dislike…or rather loathe him, to speak quite truthfully. She simply had.
Whenever he set foot into a room, she made a point of spinning on her heel and disappearing. Whenever he joined her conversational circle, she would make up an excuse and leave. Whenever their eyes happened to meet—be it at a ball or a garden party—Phineas could not help but think that she wished he would be swallowed up by the earth.
And it bothered him.
It had been bothering him.
With a gaze that whispered of her current desire to strangle him, most likely with her bare hands, Lady Louisa regarded him through narrowed eyes. “I had not realized that you would accompany your brother to this house party. I’d heard you had decided to remain in Town.”
Regarding her, Phineas could not help but smirk for he both loved and hated the way she glared at him. It spoke of a passionate nature, which to him was quite alluring; however, he would have preferred to see her passion directed toward more pleasurable emotions. “Did you now?” he teased her, enjoying the way her chest rose and fell as she fought to remain calm. It seemed the only time she did not run from him was when he challenged her, teased her, baited her. “Well, my dearest Lulu,” her nostrils flared at his nickname for her, “I must say you sound displeased to see me. Have I done anything to wrong you?” He clearly had; if only he knew what it was.
Still, the lady remained as tight-lipped on the matter as always.
That, though, was the only matter she refused to comment on.
“Do not call me that!” Lady Louisa fumed, outrage darkening her enticingly green eyes as she took a step toward him. “I’ve told you so before, and I’m saying it again. I am not a poodle, and you’re not to call me that! Is that clear?” Without waiting for an answer, she spun on her heel and rushed inside, her dark-haired sister following in her wake.
Phineas sighed, looking after her. If only she would not always run from him!
“Was that truly necessary?” Anne said reproachfully. “You used to be such a charming boy.”
Phineas chuckled, “What can I say? Your cousin brings out the best side of me.” Indeed, he had never felt more alive than when those dark green eyes looked into his, stirring his heart into a most unfamiliar rhythm.
“You truly ought to apologize, Lord Barrington,” Anne told him sternly.
Phineas feigned a sigh, then rushed off, only too glad to have an excuse to seek out Lady Louisa yet again. He caught up with her and her sister as they stepped off the last stair onto the landing on the first floor.
As though sensing his approach, Lady Louisa glanced over her shoulder, and the moment she beheld him, her eyes narrowed into slits and she spun to face him like a warrior ready for battle. “Are you following us?”
Phineas grinned at her as he strode closer, stepping onto the landing and forcing her to lift her chin to maintain eye contact. He towered over her, and he could see that she hated it; still, she would not yield.
Phineas admired that about her. “Your cousin sen
t me,” he told her in hushed tones, completely ignoring her sister who stood only a few steps away, watching them with curiosity.
Lady Louisa’s lips thinned. “She wouldn’t,” she snarled. “She knows how much I detest you.”
Phineas could not prevent a stab of pain jerking through him at her words. “She bade me apologize to you,” he told her, leaning closer, curious to see if she would retreat.
She did not.
“Apologize?” she asked, drawing in a slow breath. Still, the pulse in her neck hammered wildly. “For what then?” she challenged with a daring gleam in her eyes.
Phineas grinned and moved closer another inch; he could feel her breath against his lips. “That, she did not say,” he teased, noting the way she fought the outrage that bubbled under her skin. “Perhaps you care to enlighten me?”
Her jaw clenched, and for a moment, she simply looked at him, the expression in her eyes almost contemplative. “I’d appreciate it,” she bit out then, taking a step back, her chin still raised proudly, “if you did not address me in the future.”
Before she could rush off, Phineas reached out and the tips of his fingers brushed her arm.
Lady Louisa flinched and drew in a sharp breath before once more schooling her features into a mixture of bored indifference and righteous indignation.
“Would you have stayed away,” Phineas asked, his eyes searching hers, “had you known I would attend this house party?”
Holding his gaze, she paused. “Do not for a moment believe that your comings and goings have any influence upon how I spend my time.” Her eyes narrowed once more. “I detest you, yes; but I would never allow you to ruin this holiday season for me.” Her brows shot up in challenge. Then she gave him a feigned smile, nodded her head to him and bid him a good day before hastening down the corridor, her sister on her heels.
“Until later, Lulu,” Phineas called after her, unable to keep his lips sealed.
As expected, her shoulders tensed, but she kept walking, successfully fighting the urge to turn back around and rip his head off.
Phineas smiled. Oh, how he loved ruffling her feathers!
Chapter Two
A Foolish Wager
Needing a moment to herself, Louisa decided against joining the other guests downstairs, but rather remained on the first floor. After all, she longed neither for entertainment nor refreshments, but for solitude instead. That man had once more gotten under her skin, and she hated herself for this inexplicable weakness of hers where he was concerned.
With a shake of her head, Louisa marched down the corridor, away from the large staircase leading to the ground floor and toward the back of the house. She passed door after door, her eyes seeing nothing of the paintings hung upon the walls or the vases filled with hot-house flowers set on side tables here and there. No, instead, her eyes continued to conjure that man’s smirking visage—much to Louisa’s displeasure!
Now and then, another guest passed her after leaving their chamber to head downstairs and mingle with the others. Louisa, however, proceeded to march up and down the corridor, now and then turning a corner and heading down a thus far unfamiliar hallway. Where she was going, she did not know nor care.
At least not until an annoyingly familiar voice called her name.
Or rather that vexingly inappropriate and completely infuriating nickname that dratted man had reserved only for her! Oh, what an honor!
Flinching at the sound of his voice, Louisa drew to an abrupt halt, her hands balling into fists as she listened to his approaching footsteps. She wanted to run, to flee—to scratch his eyes out!—but her body seemed to disagree for it behaved in a rather mutinous fashion, refusing to comply in any acceptable way.
“My dearest Lulu.” Stepping around her, Phineas Hawke smirked down at her. “How wonderful to find you here. How are you?” A mocking frown descended upon his features. “You look a bit flushed. Is everything all right?”
Glaring at him, Louisa willed herself not to respond—after all, her parents had taught her better. Still, never in her life had she faced a more trying moment, had she? At least, she could not recall one. Her heart burnt, and her mind spun as her stomach churned with anger. Louisa knew she was about to explode...and then suddenly and rather unexpectedly, her body did move.
The paralysis fell from her and she found herself stepping away, her hand moving to reach for a handle, then pushing open a door. Without thought, Louisa slipped through it, ignoring the man staring at her and...belatedly realized that she had stepped out onto a balcony.
Snowflakes drifted down and settled in her hair. One even landed on the tip of her nose. An icy wind blew, and she wrapped her arms around herself, beginning to shiver, her woolen dress no match for nature’s wintry breath.
“Would you care for a coat?” that familiar voice asked in an equally familiar, mocking tone. As Louisa turned to glare at Phineas Hawk, she found him standing in the doorway, a bemused smile upon his lips as his dark gaze swept over her. “Your lips are turning blue,” he observed, a wicked gleam coming to his eyes. “Shall I warm you?”
Gritting her teeth, Louisa fought hard to subdue the renewed urge to claw his eyes out, to fling herself at him with outstretched hands and… She did not dare finish even the thought for it would prove that there was quite another side to her, one unfit for a lady. Her parents would be displeased if they knew!
Watching her carefully, Phineas Hawk waited. When she remained silent, though, he took a step forward, following her out onto the balcony. Snow settled into his raven-black hair, softening the dark edges of his appearance. For a moment, Louisa looked at him and saw not her enemy, but someone she had liked once. She watched as a snowflake landed on his left temple, melted upon touching his warm skin and then slowly snaked its way down.
And then his hand settled upon her arm, and Louisa flinched. Her gaze dragged down to meet his, and she found his eyes looking into hers without even the slightest bit of amusement or mockery. “You should come inside,” he whispered, his hand on her arm remaining where it was as he took another step closer. “You’re shivering. You’ll catch cold.” He moved sideways, his free hand gesturing to the open door behind him. “Come.”
For a split second, Louisa almost believed him, believed that there was a kind and caring side to him. She wanted to. She wanted to very badly, but she had learned her lesson and she would not forget.
Unwrapping her arms from around herself, Louisa all but shoved Phineas Hawk out of her way. Then she stormed back inside, welcoming the warm air upon her chilled skin. Her feet kept walking, her eyes fixed on the other end of the corridor. Unfortunately, she managed to take no more than a step or two before that man once more stepped into her path.
Huffing out in annoyed breath, Louisa glared up at him. “What is it that you want? Why are you here?” Again, she crossed her arms and lifted her brows in a challenging manner. “Say what you wish so we can each go our separate ways.”
A moment passed before that familiar, mocking grin once more appeared upon his face as though he were capable of an altogether different emotion. “Do not pretend you’re not happy to see me,” he teased, moving closer, undoubtedly aware of how much his presence annoyed her. “After all, is that not why you’re here? No doubt, you found out that I would attend this year’s house party, and so you thought to yourself—”
Louisa scoffed, “Do not for a second believe that I am here because of you. I am here in spite of you. My family always attends this house party,” she regarded him with a pointed stare, “you, however, do not.”
A most annoying chuckle left his lips. “Do they? If that is true, then I cannot help but wonder where they are.” He made a show of turning his head left and right as though trying to spot them. “I doubt one can overlook them; after all, there are so many of you.” He frowned, a bit of a quizzical look coming to his face. “How many sisters do you have?”
“Five,” Louisa huffed out before she could stop herself. “Don’t pret
end to care!”
“Ah, yes, and one brother, is that not so?”
Louisa glared at him. “What do you want from me? A prize for remembering that I have a brother? Applause, perhaps?”
His grin broadened in a very unsettling way. “That won’t be necessary.” He moved closer, and Louisa had to fight the instinct to retreat lest he think he could intimidate her. “I’d settle for a kiss.”
Her eyes bulged. They felt as though they wanted to jump out of her head. “You’re mad! Completely and utterly mad!” Oddly enough, outrage was not all she felt in that moment.
The man had the nerve to reach out, his fingers grasping the tip of a loose strand dancing down from her temple. He twirled the curl between the pads of his thumb and forefinger, his dark gaze never leaving hers, once again daring her to retreat. “Are you truly offended? Or are you trying not to be intrigued?” Again, he flashed that grin at her.
Trying her best not to explode, Louisa ignored the tantalizing flutter in her belly, slapped his hand away and raised her chin. “You are insufferable!” Then she made to storm past him, but didn’t get far because he once more stepped into her path. “What are you doing? What is it you want from me?”
His chest rose and fell with a slow breath as he continued to gaze at her, the look in his dark eyes hinting at emotions Louisa did not dare dwell on. “If only I knew,” he mumbled under his breath, and his feet brought him closer yet again as though he were being pulled toward her by an invisible force.
For a terrifying moment, Louisa thought he would reach for her—Her! Not a curl of her hair! Then, however, he stilled, blinked and that annoying grin was back on his face. “So, no kiss?”
Louisa gritted her teeth. “No, no kiss,” she forced out, a surprisingly poignant spark of disappointment settling in her heart as the words dropped from her lips. “Now, get out of my way!” She moved to step around him, but he swiftly blocked her path.
