‘Take it slow,’ he warns, his breath hitching at the feel of my soaking skin brushing the naked tip of his cock. ‘Fuck!’ he gulps, his fingers tightening around my hip bones and he’s grinding his teeth, his jaw clenched.
For one wild moment I imagine what’d happen if I just sat down, hard. It’d probably blow his head off, but it might not be so great for me. I’ve a feeling that the depth of penetration, given the size of his manhood, might still cause me a little discomfort. He’s right. I need to take it slow.
I take his face in my hands, stroking his high cheekbones as I start to kiss him and, as every sweep of my tongue deepens, every knead of my lips against his, I drop slowly and very carefully onto Carter’s impressive length.
He’s broken out in a full-on body shake now and his fingers are sunk into my skin so tightly, I’ll probably be bruised tomorrow. I break away from his mouth finally, he’s struggling already and he’s told me that kissing just makes it worse. As soon as my mouth’s away from his, his bottom lip is between his teeth and I know I’m not wrong.
‘Fuuuuuck…’ he grinds as I descend even further, his breath hissing through his nose as he clamps his mouth shut again. He looks tortured, like a suffering man, but the only thing he’s suffering from is pleasure overload. That and the agony of not letting his orgasm smash the door down. I need to get a move on.
Despite the size of Carter’s arousal and the depth he’s already reached, there’s no sign of the nasty pinching from last time. There’s a little bit of that strange pressure, and the feeling of fullness, but that’s not unpleasant at all and, emboldened, I slide a little more, a little more and his eyes fly open.
He’s full on gasping now and if I thought he was undone the time he sweetly took my virtue, I’ve evidently seen nothing.
‘Oh baby, what have you done to me,’ he breathes, and I’m shocked at the pleading I hear in it. He sounds in pain, agony in fact and I search his black eyes. His twists a smile at me.
‘You belong to me,’ he gasps, his eyes screwing shut as I drop the final three inches into his lap and he cries out, his breath hitching on what sounds like a sob. His eyes are squeezed shut, sweat now beginning a stroll down the sides of his face but when I just gasp helplessly, not answering him, they fly open. The look he gives me is blistering and I can’t help but twitch in his lap, clenching my pelvic floor muscles around him.
‘Oh Christ!’ he heaves out, his beautiful mouth twisting as his lip finds its way in his teeth again. ‘Say it!’ he barks and I do. Immediately.
‘I’m yours, Carter. You know I am,’ I groan into his mouth and he crushes me to his hot damp body, kissing me frantically, desperately. He drops his hands to my behind and he pulls my pelvis into him, which of course makes him slide intoxicatingly inside me. We groan together this time and he’s panting hard when his mouth breaks away.
‘As soon as you move, I’m fucked,’ he mutters. ‘I haven’t got a hope in hell of holding onto it.’ He reaches up for another kiss, his eyes sliding shut, before blinking open and I think it’s finally love that I see sitting in the hazed green irises.
Not necessarily. The man’s just in sexual utopia, don’t count your chickens, girlie…
‘This feels like my first time too, do you know that?’ He gives me a strange but wonderful smile. ‘I’m serious – you, this, us… I’m not a virgin, Pearl, but that was just sex. This is making love.’
I melt into him, joy and exhilaration now joining the hot pound of sexual desire that’s obliterating me. We just sit, our arms wrapped around each other on a hard chair in the kitchen, saying nothing, not moving in inch, but at this moment, I feel as though I’m touching Carter Jackson’s very soul. I have never been connected to a human being like this and I never will again. This minute, every passing second just marbles this man further into my very DNA and I will never be able to get him out. Of this, I am absolutely certain.
I want to sit here all night, and although this is indeed making love, I want him to make me come. I want to feel him come – not into a slimy condom, but against my secret walls. I suddenly ache for it, the chance to absorb some of him into my body, keep it mine forever and I pull my head out of his sweaty neck. He tips his head back, his eyes flickering open and they gaze at me with adoration.
He’s still breathing hard, but he’s no longer on the cusp of losing his shit. The few minutes we’ve been sitting and holding each other have enabled him to rein in his control a little. He won’t keep that control, he’s already told me he won’t, but I want him more than once tonight and in bed, at that. It’s getting late and it’s time to make beautiful Carter come like the proverbial train.
Dipping to kiss him, he breathes his next words as his lips connect with mine.
‘I’m such a lucky fucking bastard.’
I break away from his mouth. ‘You ain’t seen nothing yet, Jackson,’ I whisper, hiking a brow and he looks up at me warily. His hands slide from around my back to my breasts and he kneads them gently and slowly, his thumbs brushing my hardened nipples and my stomach contracts.
Placing both my palms on his shoulders, I push the balls of my feet onto the floor. When I’m sure my leverage is right, I kiss him gently, locking with his eyes, which crinkle adoringly at the corners when he smiles.
‘Don’t try and hold onto it, Carter. I don’t care, just let go,’ I whisper to him and he kisses me urgently again.
‘Fuck – the things you say turn me inside out.’ He’s gasping again now as he assaults me with his mouth, his tongue tangled deeply with mine and when we’re completely full of each other, I decide quickly what I’m going to do. Whichever way you slice it, I’m going to obliterate him in seconds. Do I stroke slowly up and down a few times, or… do I give him one hard slam of my pelvis onto his? Can I cope with that?
Hell yeah.
I want Carter’s orgasm to be so powerful that it binds his heart and soul to me forever, so intense, he’ll never forget it. I want this man so drunk on my body and what I can do to him with it, the pleasure that I effortlessly seem to make him feel, that he will never be able to walk away from me. I’m halfway there, even though he’s never said the words, he feels something powerful for me. It’s in him, deeply buried and hidden. Locked away from my yearning mind, but one day, I’ll find the key and let it out.
You need to let something else out first – are you moving or just sitting on his cock all night?
Dragging my mind back to the task in hand, I decide not to give this stunning man underneath me any warning whatsoever. Biting back the burning urge to whisper I love you first, my knees move and I slide quickly up to his tip, gripping his shoulders, clenching my teeth and preparing myself for the pain. I know this is going to hurt, how can it not, and he’s not going to be happy with me at all when he realises, but I’m doing this. Before I have chance to change my mind, I slam my hips back down onto Carter’s length, impaling myself instantly.
I’m too busy focussed on the writhing, twitching man underneath me, but then I realise that there’s no pain, none at all. Just hot throbbing pleasure – I’m lubricated to within an inch of my life, so incredibly turned on.
‘I can’t…!’ he sobs, dragging my face to his desperately, his mouth all over me. ‘Oh, Pearl I… I… Jesus! Fuck!’ and then he jerks violently inside me, his cock contracting. I wrap myself around him, the strength of his orgasm seeming to smash into him again and again. He gasps and groans, dragging my face into his neck, his hands running feverishly all over my sweat coated body.
‘Oh my God…’ he mumbles, his voice muffled in my damp hair but I can hear the tremor in it. He’s trembling all over and when I slide a quiet grind onto him I feel another flood inside me and he shudders.
I haven’t come, but I don’t give a toss. This was about him tonight – not me. This was about him feeling so much more without a rubber sheath, about me stoking his pleasure to dizzying heights, seeing him come apart underneath my body. I’ve certainly done that. I r
emember his gasped words just before he came… Pearl, I… I… Was he about to say the words I long to hear?
I squeeze him gently, plastered against his body, my face burrowed into his neck and I kiss his throat languidly. I could stay here all night, but the bed would be far comfier for round two. As soon as he realises that I haven’t come, he’s going to want to remedy that. At least when he’s got his breath back.
He shifts underneath me, he’s obviously not comfortable on the hard kitchen chair and I peel myself reluctantly from his upper body, my arms releasing him. I sit back, feeling him twitch inside me again as I move and he sits up, giving me the loveliest, lopsided smile. God, he looks so young.
And happy.
He does. He’s glowing, lit up from within, his emerald eyes on fire as he gazes up at me.
‘What the actual fuck…?’ he starts but then shakes his head. ‘I swear too much,’ he mutters, almost to himself and I laugh.
‘Yeah, you do, but I really like it,’ I admit and he cocks a brow.
‘That’s fortuitous, because I can’t seem to switch it off when I’m with you,’ he says, a finger coming up to gently trace my eyebrow. ‘That was the most incredible orgasm I’ve ever had,’ he admits, his eyes liquid. ‘The pleasure was almost overload, it went on and on.’
Excellent. Job done.
I beam down at him. ‘Glad you enjoyed it. Plenty more where that came from, Mr Jackson,’ I say playfully, but I’m feeling pretty damned good right now. I’m an eighteen year old ex-homeless girl and I’ve got an impossibly beautiful man, naked underneath me, telling me that I’ve just blown his orgasm socks off. It’s powerful stuff.
‘Are you okay?’ he murmurs, concern threading into his eyes now. ‘What the hell was that, by the way? I thought you were meant to be taking it slow,’ he says reprovingly.
‘Couldn’t help myself,’ I admit and his eyes clear immediately. ‘I knew it wouldn’t hurt, Carter, I wouldn’t have done it otherwise.’
Bloody liar.
I knew no such thing, but I didn’t care. I took a risk and it paid off.
‘You didn’t come though, did you?’ he asks quietly, his eyes searching. I’m not surprised he knows, even blinded by his own pleasure as he was. My body goes nuts when I orgasm, even from my limited experience. Everything clenches, twitches, jerks. He knows full well I didn’t have one and I shake my head.
‘I don’t care,’ I fire at him and he kisses my nose.
‘I do, though,’ he says, wrapping his arms around me and he stands up. I cling to him, my legs wrapped firmly around his hips, my arms around his neck. He’s still inside me. Good. I want him there forever.
Twenty Five
Carter carries me into the bedroom, flipping on one of the bedside lamps before pulling back the duvet and bending to put me onto the bed. I try, but my arms and legs won’t let go of him and after a few seconds, when he realises that I can’t actually put him down, he laughs softly. Sliding onto his side, he shifts onto the bed himself, me underneath him and he tugs the duvet up, covering us both.
I lie back, hooking my calves over his lower thighs and pulling his pelvis into me. He hisses and groans, dropping his head, his damp curls tumbling over my chest and I feel his hot breath bathe my nipple, which stiffens immediately at the feel of him. He slides out of me gently, but doesn’t move from between my parted thighs. He props himself up on his forearms by the side of my face and stares down at me.
‘Did you have to do that?’ I whine.
‘What?’
‘Take it out!’ I say, pouting childishly and he laughs softly.
‘I’ll put it back in a while, I promise.’ He rubs his nose gently against mine. ‘I know I owe you an orgasm, baby, and you’ll get more than one by the time I’m done with you tonight.’
I gape up at him, and he takes full advantage of my open mouth, his lips parting as his face descends. His eyes close when our skin touches and I thread my fingers through his storm of curls, pushing them back from his flushed face. God, I love him so much, I feel as though I’m going to dissolve with it, explode with it. I’m almost on the verge of not knowing what the fuck to do with myself.
He pulls gently away eventually, his eyes molten and he strokes my tumbled hair.
‘You’ve got such beautiful hair,’ he whispers. ‘I only have to think about running my fingers through it when I’m away from you and I’m hard.’
I grin up at him. ‘Everything about you is beautiful, Carter. If I start, we’ll be here all night!’
He rolls his eyes, but I can see that he’s delighted at my words, the confirmation that I find him so uncontrollably attractive. I really have no idea why he would ever question it. The man has eyes in his head; surely he knows just how hot he is? Besides which, his beautiful cousin is hopelessly in love with him.
Shit.
Why did I have to think about that witch? But now I have, I need to talk to him about her. I’ve held off, we both have, but we can’t ignore Toria the Elephant in the room any longer. Carter can see the thoughts tumbling in my mind, his eyes searching as he strokes my hair. He shifts himself to the side, so that he’s no longer lying on me and I turn to him as he settles next to me. I love it when he lies like this, his head propped up on one powerful arm, the bunching of his biceps making my belly flutter.
‘What’s going round in that head of yours?’ he asks softly and I sigh. I want him to make love to me again, I want to make love to him all night long, but we need to talk about this first. I need to know what happened in Dorset. It’s been chewing away at me since the moment he left, like a parasite buried under my skin, slowly eating me alive.
I take a deep breath.
‘Did you see her?’ I ask quietly. He doesn’t need me to say her name. I see his expressive eyes darken a shade and I’ve got my answer before he says the words. He’s seen her. I can read it.
‘Yes,’ he says immediately. ‘I went to Jimmy’s last night.’
I shuffle a little closer, my trembling fingers fiddling with the damp copper hair smattered on his breastbone, waiting. I don’t want to have to drag it out of him, it would seriously put the wind up me, but thankfully, I don’t need to.
‘It was a difficult conversation, I had to be blunt,’ he starts. ‘I’ve been trying to tell her for some time now that there’s no chance of us ever getting back together, but she wasn’t accepting it.’ He traces my lips with the tips of his fingers and I kiss them.
‘I told her that I’d met someone else and that we’d started a relationship. I told her that I’d been in bed with you, the last time she called me, and…’
He breaks off when he sees my mouth fall open and he winces. ‘Sorry… that was probably going a bit far…’
I shake my head. ‘No, it’s fine,’ I smile. It is. It’s more than fine, it’s great, brilliant! I feel a thread of sympathy for Toria for a moment. If she really is in love with him, and I’ll bet my last pound she is, then hearing those words leave Carter’s beautiful mouth must have been like knives in her heart. A shiver runs through me, as I imagine him sitting next to me, saying the same things. That he’d met someone else, was in an intimate relationship with her. Jesus, I’d never get the vile images out of my imagination. I try and concentrate again, Carter shifting slightly, stretching for a moment.
‘I had to hold myself back from showing her your picture,’ he admits now and I beam a grin at him. I’m surprised, actually, given how bloody smart he is that he didn’t think of my idea. He sees me grinning, as he raises a questioning brow, a small smile of his own playing around his lips. Seeing me happy is obviously infectious to him.
‘What?’ he says and I pull a stupid face at him.
‘I had a brainwave,’ I tell him. ‘I cropped yours, so that no one could see your…’
His mouth drops open. ‘Are you fucking kidding me?’ He looks comically horrified for a moment. ‘Who did you show it to?’
I try for nonchalant. ‘Oh, just Donna, Gemma… Dia
ne.’
‘Christ!’ he exclaims, shaking his head. ‘What did she say?’
‘Nice tat!’
He laughs. ‘That’s alright then,’ he says, looking relieved and I roll onto my back, turning my head to look up at him.
‘She did say that you had an utterly beautiful body and should be a male model,’ I say casually and he groans, kneading his thumb and forefinger into the corners of his eyes briefly.
‘C’mon, Carter,’ I say playfully, leaning forward to kiss his neck. ‘You don’t have to be modest around me. You know full well how incredibly good looking you are.’
My words are softly spoken, but I can hear the emotion soaked into every one. His eyes are gentle as he gazes down at me, and they skip over my face tenderly, as if taking in every feature, every pore. He leans his forehead against mine and closes his eyes.
‘Beauty is only skin-deep, Pearl. It’s who you are inside that really matters.’ He pulls back and kisses me softly. ‘I knew from the moment I first spoke to you, baby, that you were as beautiful inside as you are physically. You’re the most incredible person I’ve ever met.’
I ache with love for this man again. Ache to the point of pain, but it’s sweet pain, the agony of desperate want. In a moment of stunning clarity, looking up into his eyes, it hits me that if I ever lose him, I will never fully recover.
How could I be so stupid as to let myself fall this deeply in love? I’ve just turned eighteen years old and only started to live my life two years ago, but because of one chance meeting, I’m lost forever. This man has made me feel things that I didn’t think I’d be lucky enough to ever feel, and as such, he has a place in my heart and soul that’s his alone. No one will ever be able to eradicate him completely, he’s stolen part of me forever.
I haven’t answered him. I’ve been too focussed on my churning thoughts, imagining the real pain that I’d feel if I ever lost him. I try and push it away. We’ve woven something magical around ourselves tonight, he shouldn’t even be here by rights, and he made love to me bareback for the first time. It was incredible and I want more of him. I don’t want to let thoughts of him ever leaving me sour the incredible connection we’re both feeling.
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