"Oh." The man frowned, then his expression cleared somewhat. "Oh, right, you weren't there, it was Kana and that kid that Snow's training. Elton or something. Anyway, that's what happened. The barrier was, ah, hiccupping."
"And… it threw a building?" Vel asked, just to clarify.
"Yeah. No. That was—I mean, no, yes. It threw a building." Gabriel nodded unsteadily.
The guards sighed sharply as their walkie-talkies crackled. "Just go, Gabriel, before you cause any more trouble. Come back tomorrow when you're thinking straight."
"I never think straight. I'm a whore and my clients are men. Get it?" Gabriel giggled once and made a face. "I need a shower. Can I borrow your shower, Vel?"
Vel was intensely surprised that he remembered his name. "Um," he stammered, glancing at the guards. One of them had departed through the gate, and another was speaking into his walkie-talkie. He spared Vel a glance and waved his hand absently.
"Just get him out of here," the soldier grunted, turning away. "Comm, C-5 reporting. All fine at Main Exit. We need another net. Affirmative. Affirmative. Negative, there's…"
Gabriel tapped Vel on the shoulder. The look he gave Vel was ridiculously piteous, like a lost puppy. "I want a shower," he told Vel.
"Uh, okay. Just… follow me."
Gabriel walked unevenly after Vel as he led the way back to the barracks. Vel kept a wary eye on him in case he fell over—he certainly seemed drunk enough for it. But they made it up the stairs and into the bathroom without incident and without talking. Gabriel plucked off his clothes clumsily without an iota of modesty, and went into the nearest shower stall. Vel sat down on a bench and waited, glad that the bathroom was empty.
Gabriel ran the shower so hot that the soap-scented steam rolling out of his stall obscured even his head, which the short porcelain-tiled wall didn't cover. It made Vel feel a little less awkward. Gabriel seemed keen on taking his time, so Vel slipped out quietly and went to his room to get a towel; when he returned, half of the bathroom was foggy and echoing with cheerful whistling. Several more long minutes passed before the loud patter of water stopped and Gabriel stepped out again, gloriously naked. The questions Vel were about to ask evaporated on his tongue as he stared, momentarily caught up in how beautiful the man was. His body was in the perfect grey area between lithe and muscular, tailored to suit his tall, broad frame, rippling with subtle contours that shifted with his movements. His skin glistened and dripped with hot water, and his ordinary brown hair had turned the colour of black coffee, gleaming glossily.
"Like what you see?" Gabriel teased. He sounded a lot more sober. Vel snapped out of his daze and wordlessly handed over the towel. "Cheers." He scrubbed his hair briefly, wiped down his skin then tied it deftly around his waist. He stretched, rolled his shoulders and grinned, sitting down beside Vel. "Ah, I feel so much better. I love the showers here."
"So you use them often, then?" Vel asked.
Gabriel slouched down and propped his feet up on a laundry basket. The towel threatened to slip and he made no move to tug it back into place. "Not here, obviously. The lieutenants' showers. They're even better. Well, Snow's is; I haven't really sampled many others. The walls go up to the ceiling, at least. Not that I care who sees," he added with a wink.
"You use Lieutenant Snow's shower?" Vel repeated, smirking. "Can I ask what leads up to that?"
Gabriel snorted. "Only the desire to get clean. I'm sure you know all about the astounding sanitary levels of the slums. I shower alone, to be perfectly clear. Believe me, I've been trying for years, but not much has ever happened. Snow is a little asexual."
"Really? But is he just not into guys? Does he actually mind you hitting on him all the time?"
Gabriel stared at him askance, then burst out laughing. "Dude, I'm not going to sit here and dish out gossip about my friend's personal business. Who the fuck do you think I am?"
"The type of person who would do exactly that. Providing said business is harmless, of course.
Plus, you brought up the topic." Vel waited.
There was a pause before Gabriel chuckled again and leaned back. "You're a funny kid. No, he doesn't mind guys, and I honestly think he likes my attention, but… hm. There was this one woman who… nah, I won't tell you. And please don't ask him about it; it's highly unprofessional and you might end up getting punched. You don't want that, trust me. Anyway. Let's not talk about him."
Fine by Vel. Elstrin would probably want to find out more, but he wasn't Elstrin. He had more pressing matters in mind, but he thought he ought to start out small. "What happened back there?"
Gabriel wriggled his eyebrows suggestively. "Back where? Be specific, cadet." "Oh my god. Back at the fucking gate. Where something flung a house at the wall." "It wasn't a house. It was some office storeroom. Don't worry, it was pretty useless." "Yeah, I'm so glad nothing important was destroyed," Vel said dryly.
"Heh. I told you. You know about the barrier around HQ, right? It had a little—well, big-ish— glitch. They'll patch it up, it's no big deal."
Vel did know about the barrier—Kana had told him months ago. He'd spent a few days trying to poke at it to no avail. It was made of solid, tightly-linked magic that slotted together like a hard geometric pane, completely resilient and so perfect that it was nigh undetectable. Whoever made it knew what they were doing, to say the least. "But why were you so angry? Who was that drama queen you were talking about? You were implying 'he' threw the building."
"I was? I don't know. I was drunk. It was the barrier, not some guy."
"Why were you drunk, then?"
"Because… I consumed vast amounts of alcohol in a short period of time?"
Vel sighed, irritated. "Come on. Be serious."
"I am. I'm telling the truth, and if you want to waste the rest of your weekend sitting here and grilling me with questions, then go right ahead."
"If you don't want to talk to me, then why are you still here?" Vel huffed.
"I want you to ask all the questions you want to ask so you'll stop hounding me whenever I come up here. Your instructors are starting to complain I'm distracting you during your training. As if it's my fault I'm so hot."
Vel smiled grudgingly at that. "Fine. Three months ago…"
"Still got that necklace?"
"Yes. Um, thank you. I was wondering…" It seemed rude to outright accuse the entire army of spinning a lie about their colonel's death, and Vel wasn't sure how loyal Gabriel was to the soldiers, so he tried to play it safe. "I was wondering when exactly my brother last spoke to you. I mean, did he know the mission was going to be dangerous and he might not come back, was that why he left behind such a… detailed message?"
"He last spoke to me two minutes and seven seconds before his death," Gabriel said bluntly.
Vel froze, looking at the man with wide eyes. Gabriel clearly saw right through him, so with an effort, he went on. "H-how—"
"Why did you want to find me so badly?" Gabriel interrupted. "You, your sister, and later your boyfriend. I was aware of it. Serpent never told you guys much about me, I know that. So why?"
Vel looked down. "I… heard things. About you."
"Tell me."
"You're an actual necromancer. A proper one. Back in Lupalia, you could do… impossible things. Not just dismissals, anyone could do that, but stuff like… exorcisms. Banishments. Crazy dark rituals, things that fifty sorcerers couldn't manage. And… um. Resurrection."
"That last one's a little far-fetched, don't you think?" Gabriel said with a smile. "And?"
"You could communicate with spirits, talk to them, interact with them. You could… line up borders, whatever that means. You could find and speak with ghosts from different places, different times. So when my brother…" Vel cleared his throat. "Erm. After… it happened, I was reading through all his letters, and in one of them he mentioned you in passing, and I remembered all those rumours I'd heard."
Gabriel's eyes were surprisingly gentle. "Well then, Vel, you
just answered your own question."
"Huh? What do you mean?"
"They weren't rumours. Apart from the resurrection bit, of course. But the rest I could do, yes. I'd stopped when I came to Mernot, but people still knew." He gazed at the far wall. "When Serpent was dying, alone and scared… he sent me a prayer. I heard it."
Vel just stared. One question answered, and the answer wasn't the one he'd been desperately hoping for. He burst out again, "How—"
"It doesn't matter how he died."
"What? Of course it matters! What if it wasn't an accident? What if there were people responsible for it? I'm just supposed to let it slide?"
"An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind," Gabriel mused.
"What? Who said that?"
"I don't know. Probably some wise old monk. Point is, it's no use dwelling on the past. Thinking about stuff like revenge won't bring your brother back."
"Okay, I won't. Just tell me, please. If you were there, I mean, if you were… listening, or something, then you must know. Just tell me so I can have some closure."
"You already do." Gabriel sighed, shoulders slumping tiredly. "You're fine, Vel, you've gotten over it. Look at you. You're doing everything he could've ever hoped for. Isn't that enough?"
"No," Vel said flatly.
"Why not? You made it out, you made it up here. At least you're luckier than your sister—"
"Don't talk about my sister," Vel snapped harshly.
"Why not?" Gabriel challenged again. "I don't know her, but in a way, I'm closer to her than you ever will be."
The world stopped for a second, then Vel found he was standing up and backing towards the door, because it was the only thing he could do to physically stop himself from launching forward and beating the shit out of Gabriel.
"Okay, I'm sorry," Gabriel said quickly, holding up his hands. "I shouldn't have said that. I'm having a bad day, that's all. Come back here."
Vel didn't move. "Don't talk about her that way ever again," he warned shakily.
"Got it. I promise." Gabriel gave him a beseeching look. "What? You want to punch me? You can, if you want. I deserve—"
Vel's fist smashed into the side of his face with enough force to make his knuckles sting. Fuck, the man had sharp cheekbones. Vel rubbed his hand and almost immediately regretted hitting him, all his rage having puffed away in that single violent moment. Gabriel shook his damp hair out of his eyes, worked his jaw and laughed a little.
"Fuck. Ow. Didn't think you'd actually do that."
"Sorry."
"No, don't be. Brought it onto myself." Gabriel ran his tongue over his teeth once, seemed to think the damage wasn't too bad and sat back again nonchalantly. Vel joined him. "What I was trying to say is you should stop worrying about Serpent."
"I can't," Vel said, voice small.
"Just accept what happened and try to move on, okay? There's nothing you can do to change the situation anyway."
Vel picked at his nails. Gabriel reached over and casually moved his hands apart again. "How come he never talked about you?"
Gabriel hesitated. "I'm not sure. I told him not to reveal any secrets about the things I used to do in Lupalia, I tell everyone that, but I never forbade him to mention me or anything."
Vel waited.
"We were best friends. We did everything together, at least as much as possible. But… what I think is… ah, it's a little private."
"It doesn't matter. He's dead," Vel mumbled, and suddenly he wanted to cry. He'd had years to cope with the absence of his brother, but the pain never really went away.
"Aw, hey," Gabriel murmured, shifting closer to put a warm arm around him. Vel sniffed and leaned his head on Gabriel's shoulder, staring dejectedly at the ugly anti-slip mats lining the floor. Gabriel was quiet for a while, but eventually he admitted, "He was in love with me."
In any other context, the news would've shocked Vel. Now, he just managed a tired nod.
"And I tried not to let that get in the way, 'cause he was a great guy. But I couldn't return his feelings, and I think that drove us apart a little over the years. I was the first guy he was seriously romantically attached to, and I guess he didn't want to risk revealing that in his letters and have you guys ask questions. Towards the end he was just trying his hardest to just stay friends with me, nothing more. I think ultimately he would've moved on with someone else and then he'd feel more secure talking about me, but… that didn't happen, obviously."
"Why didn't you love him back?" Vel asked softly, speaking to his lap.
Gabriel looked at him patiently. "Because I didn't," he said. "Not in that way. Sometimes I wondered what it would've been like, but I just never felt the same."
"Why not? What was so bad about him?"
"Nothing, nothing at all. It's just… these things don't just all fall perfectly into place, Vel. Sometimes you break someone's heart without meaning to, and sometimes somebody breaks yours without realising. Do I even need to lecture you on this? I'm not the best person to go to when it comes to relationship advice, you know."
"I'm just trying to understand. You and him. All these secrets."
Gabriel squeezed his shoulders. "I know. But like you said, and like I've been saying, it doesn't matter. The best thing you can do now is honour his memory and just be happy, like he wanted."
Vel exhaled and sat up, and found that he missed the warmth. "Yeah. I am, but there are still things that—"
"Vel? God, I've been looking all over for you, where have you—" Andrew strode into the bathroom and stopped short, staring at them, dumbstruck.
Gabriel stood up calmly and started to get dressed back into his dusty clothes. "You must be Andrew Walker. Nice to meet you. Vel and I were just having a pleasant conversation."
"Oh. Uh—not to sound rude or anything, but were you almost naked the entire time?"
"Why, are you jealous you didn't get to see too?" Gabriel shrugged on his shirt and smoothed it out. He turned to Vel, but Andrew spoke before him.
"What happened to Vel's brother?"
"I've asked him that already, babe," Vel muttered, slightly embarrassed.
Gabriel smirked. "My, my, you two have really gotten your whole ambush plan worked out, haven't you? Trap me in the bathroom and just interrogate the fuck out of me. Appreciate it." He gave Vel his towel back. "I'll be going now."
"Thanks for the talk," Vel mumbled.
"No problem." Gabriel turned serious. "About the business with Serpent—will you agree to not
look into it? I'm not saying you don't have the right to know, but I'm not calling the shots here. Some people think it's best for you."
"Okay," Vel said heavily.
"Good. See you around, maybe." Gabriel patted his shoulder once, nodded to Andrew and strode out of the bathroom, turning a corner out of sight.
"What was all that about?" Andrew asked, nonplussed, glancing around the bathroom as if it would give him clues. "Apparently there was this explosion or something right inside the wall, I thought you might've been hurt."
"Oh, that," Vel said absently. "No, that's nothing, I'm fine." He took a deep breath and smiled at Andrew's confusion, linking their hands together and exiting the bathroom. Gabriel was already gone. "I'll tell you tonight, okay? Let's go to the music room. I miss the drums."
"You always miss the drums. You miss home," Andrew pointed out, and Vel couldn't agree more.
Chapter 18
The eighth time Snow didn't show up, Elstrin got frustrated enough to ask after him. He knew he wouldn't get much more than vague versions of "it's none of your business", but it simply
felt wrong that Snow could be so sick that he'd miss seven days of training in less than two months. The man was a machine, for god's sake—not just for melee weapons, but now that they'd started archery and ranged weapons, Elstrin found that it was nearly impossible to jostle the lieutenant off-target, even if you shoved him. It was improbable that he'd suddenly catch some virus that he couldn't sha
ke off, given his physical fitness and HQ's obviously well-stocked medical supplies.
Elstrin remembered the first time it had happened, around six weeks ago, a few days before Kana dragged him out into the storm and they came back to end up doing something else entirely. Stag, who'd only appeared briefly to address the cadets, had told him imprecisely that Snow had a cold and would be unable to supervise him, and promptly assigned him another lieutenant. That was strange enough—the previous day, Snow had looked absolutely healthy. And what was even stranger was he also looked absolutely healthy the next day. It was as if he'd simply decided to skip training without warning. No amount of nagging could get Snow to deviate from his patient explanation of it being the flu, and in the end Elstrin had accepted it as a true, albeit unlikely, report. Mentioning glimpsing Gabriel in the morning only brought forth a shrug and the casual admission that he had ties to HQ. Nothing more.
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