by S A Clayton
“Damn, I knew you would feel amazing but… fuck.”
My head dips, taking a nipple in my mouth and sucking, gasping as her pussy tightens around me. My head rests on her chest as my hands grasp her hips, holding her still as she continues to try to move.
“Wait Nel, if you move right now, this will be over before it even starts.”
She doesn’t listen, her hips surging up and that’s all I can take as I start to slam into her over and over again.
“God…” she whimpers, her legs still wrapped around my waist as I pull her up, her lips meeting mine as everything starts to slow down. I bring her to the edge of the counter as I slow my thrusts. Her arms wrap themselves around my shoulders and before long I start to feel that unmistakable tingle in my spine as I speed up, my fingers finding her clit as her body shudders once more. Her teeth sink into my neck as she muffles the groan that escapes and although I know it’s stupid to do this here when Jaxon is just down the hall, I can’t stop what’s about to happen. Her pussy ripples around me as she begins to convulse, lost in the throes of passion, I bask in Nel at this moment because it’s damn beautiful.
“Nel, baby, I need to pull out. I’m so close…” She shakes her head, her breathing is ragged from the orgasm that just ran through her. Her lips sear to mine in a kiss that can only be described as desperate, so I surge back inside her, my cock swelling instantly as her pussy flutters once again, pulling the orgasm from me and leaving blinding light behind.
Neither of us says anything for a minute, as our breathing goes back to normal. My arms stay around her waist as her fingers play with the hair on my chest. This is the feeling I’ve been searching for all these years, this feeling of contentment, of satisfaction, and adoration. At this moment, I know I could easily fall into life with Nel, and it’s only been a few days.
“You okay?” she asks, her voice just above a whisper, her breath still shaky as the aftershocks slowly diminish.
“Sweetheart, I am way more than okay.” I lean back so I can see her, and the smile that lights up her face is one I will remember for days to come. “Are you okay?”
She nods, her eyes leaving mine as her head leans against the hollow of my chest.
“I didn’t think it could feel like that,” she admits, loving that I was the one that could make her feel this way, but also upset that her jerk of an ex didn’t know what the fuck he was doing. “Don’t go getting a big head,” she jokes.
“Too late.”
She smacks my chest, laughter rolling through her body, causing her pussy to tighten around my cock once more. Her eyes bulge as she feels him getting harder once more.
“Again?”
I smirk, loving the heat that washes off her, my fingers digging into the small of her back.
“Nel, you’re going to learn fast that it doesn’t take much for me to get hard around you.”
She blushes, the pink color traveling past her cheeks and onto her chest, which is heaving with desire. Before she can question anything, I pick her up, her legs anchoring her to me as I walk us out of the kitchen and down the hall to my bedroom.
“What are you doing?” she asks as I climb onto the bed, bringing her over me so she’s straddling my hips.
“I’ve dreamed about you riding me in this bed for days, and I think it’s about time it came true, don’t you?”
She smirks, her hands resting on the top of the headboard as her hips begin to move.
It doesn’t take long for the slow and steady pace of her hips to become erratic, and that’s when I take over, rolling us and surging into her as her mouth opens on a scream.
Heaven.
That’s what being with Nel feels like, and I know that when the time comes to go back to my old life, I might not be able to leave her behind.
Chapter 15
When I wake up, the room is pitch black, and for a split second, I forget where I am, panicking when I don’t feel Jaxon’s small body next to me. As I turn, taking in a sleeping Dane, a groan leaves his throat as he rolls over while his arm stretches across my stomach. I close my eyes as I replay the events of last night like some kind of erotic feature film.
I’ve never been one to fall into bed with someone I just met, or in this case someone I’ve only known for a few days. Yet, I can’t deny the chemistry that courses between us every time we’re in the same room. Dane has this aura that calls to my primal need to wrap myself around him, feel his warmth and bask in his protective nature. What he did yesterday for Jaxon was more than I ever expected. He took every guilt-ridden thought he never knew I had and turned them into a little boy’s dream, and for that, I will always be grateful. But right now, I need to concentrate on how I’m going to get out of this bed without waking him up.
“Don’t you dare think about getting out of this bed,” Dane murmurs into the pillow next to my head and when my gaze finds him, his eyes are closed. I start to roll my eyes as he says, “You can roll your eyes all you want, sweetheart, doesn’t change the fact that you’re not leaving.”
I try to hide my chuckle, but it’s no use. “How the heck did you know I was about to leave… you were sleeping?”
He finally opens those eyes and the smile that filters across his face sends a flutter through my core.
“You tensed.” The smile is gone as he leans up onto his elbow, his hand lightly brushing the side of my face.
“I tensed?”
“Yeah, when I rolled over and wrapped my arm around you, you tensed.”
I did? I didn’t even realize I did that.
“You okay with everything that happened last night?”
Was I okay with it? My body obviously enjoyed it since my pussy feels like raw sandpaper and I can’t seem to move any of my extremities. He must sense the doubt that’s about to come crashing down around me, so he leans down and lightly kisses my bare shoulder.
“Nel, I like you; I want to see where this goes, but only if you want to. Only if you’re comfortable with this. You have Jax to think about and I don’t want to stand in between you and the life you’ve built with your son.”
My heart stops. Never in my life has a man said anything close to something so perfect, and when our eyes meet, I know without a doubt that I will do anything in my power to make this work.
“I like you too,” I whisper as his lips stretch into a smile that causes my entire body to come alive. “But…”
The smile falters right before I take the hand that rests on my stomach and bring it to my lips.
“I need to talk to Jaxon before this goes any further.” As much as I wish I could throw caution to the wind, I need to think of my son. He is more important than the number of orgasms I can have in an hour.
The answer to that question is six.
“Nel, I know I’m just some washed-up rock star, but I do know that your son comes first, and I would never make you choose.”
My eyes lower before his fingers dip beneath my chin, lifting my eyes back to his. “As much as I wish I could spend every waking hour learning your body and that gorgeous brain of yours, I’m okay with going slow.”
The breath I let out lifts some of the weight I’ve been carrying for the past few days.
“Good,” I whisper as I kiss him lightly, pulling away before it turns into something more. He groans as I get out of bed, trying to find my clothes only to remember that he discarded them on the kitchen floor, along with my ruined panties.
“Here,” he says from behind me as he holds out one of his T-shirts.
When my eyes take in the picture on the front, I can’t help but start to laugh.
“Really? You’re giving me one of your band T-shirts?” I quirk an eyebrow as he shrugs. I just shake my head, pulling the fabric over my head, and sigh when it hits just below my knees.
“You better leave now, Nel.”
“Why?”
“Because the sight of you with my face on your chest is causing me to lose my damn mind. So if you don’t want to spend the next hour with me deep inside you, then you need to leave.”
God, those words hit right at my core, and as much as I would love to know what that desire behind his eyes would mean for my body, I know I need to get back to Jaxon.
“Save that look for later, okay?”
“Promise,” he grunts as I turn, walking out of his room and back into mine.
I smile as I take in a sleeping Jaxon, the only five-year-old I know who sleeps like the dead. His little body takes up the entire bed, his head facing the wrong direction as his feet hit the headboard. I carefully pick him up, place him right side up and then I find a new pair of panties. It doesn’t take long for me to drift off once I lie down, and I dream about everything that would have happened if I stayed in Dane’s room.
Before I know it, my alarm is going off and I’m groaning into my pillow, hating my past self for depriving me of my eight hours of sleep. When I open my eyes, I expect to see a sleeping Jaxon, but when my eyes adjust and notice his spot is empty, my chest compresses, and that sense of panic starts to kick in. It’s not until I hear laughter coming from the kitchen that my heart starts to slow and my breathing calms.
As I get dressed, I hear my phone go off, and when I check to see if it’s Brian, I see it’s an email from the landlord and I open it immediately. I don’t know why I’m dreading going back to my apartment, it’s better that way. Yet the idea of leaving Dane is becoming harder and harder the longer we stay.
Dear Ms. Winston,
Please be advised that your apartment will be complete no later than December 24th, you will be contacted once the work is completed. If you have any further questions, please don’t hesitate to call.
I stare at the email for a second, wondering why on earth the end date would be Christmas Eve, but it’s not like I have a choice. Hopefully, it’s done in the next day or two so Jaxon can have Christmas in his own apartment.
Since Brian got home early from his work trip this week, that means Jaxon will be staying there all weekend, so I run around our room trying to collect some things for him to take to his dad’s. I take a glance at my watch and curse. I still need to get Jaxon ready for school, so I rush out of our bedroom and head into the kitchen where I find my son already ready to go.
“What…”
“Look, Mom! Dane helped me get ready!”
My eyes bulge, meeting Dane’s. He looks almost guilty but what he doesn’t understand is the relief that just washed over me.
“He did! Well, that was very nice of him.” I walk past both of them, going to the fridge and quickly making Jaxon’s lunch since I was a little too preoccupied to do it last night.
“You okay?” Dane asks, coming up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist while his lips find the crook of my neck. My body tenses, my eyes going directly to Jaxon who isn’t even paying attention.
“I’m fine,” I whisper, unfolding myself from his arms as I make my way to where Jaxon is sitting. Just as I’m about to turn around and apologize, Dane’s phone goes off, distracting him.
“You ready to go, sweetie?”
Jaxon nods his head, his blond hair falling into his eyes which reminds me that I need to take him to get a haircut. When I push the hair out of his face, he looks up at me and smiles.
“Mommy, are you and Dane getting married?”
Dane spits out the coffee he was drinking while my mouth goes completely numb. Dane’s face showcases just how frightened he is by that question, but I ignore it as I crouch down, looking my son in the eyes as I try and come up with a way to explain this away.
“Why would you think that?”
“Well, Daddy lives with Jessica and they’re getting married, and we live with Dane now, so I thought…” He trails off as relief floods through my veins.
“Sweetie, your daddy and Jessica love each other, that’s why they’re getting married.” Although the fact that she’s ten years younger probably helps a lot too.
“So, you don’t love Dane?”
I knew this question was coming but when I hear it said out loud the room stills. Dane’s eyes meet mine from across the room, a small smirk peeking through his lips.
“No, sweetie, I don’t love Dane.”
Jaxon’s face falls, and yet, like nothing just happened, he jumps up and runs toward the living room.
“Jaxon, come back here, please.”
He stops, turns, and runs back to me.
“What would you think about Dane spending more time with us? Like Jessica does with Daddy?”
He cocks his head to the side, his little fingers resting against his chin like he’s thinking really hard, causing Dane to chuckle.
“Yeah, that’s okay.”
“Yeah? You’d be okay with that?”
He nods his head and then runs back into the living room as if what I asked didn’t change a thing.
But it did. It changed everything.
Chapter 16
BRENT: We have a problem. Meet me at Bruno’s in an hour.
That text from Brent sent chills down every limb of my body when I read it this morning. I knew Frankie being this quiet was too good to be true, I knew the final shoe was going to drop, and I have a feeling this is it.
When I walk into Bruno’s, Brent’s already sitting at a table in the back, away from the windows and secluded. He looks the same, except for the heavy bags under his eyes and the posture of someone that looks almost defeated.
“Dude, you look like shit,” I joke, sitting across from him, that sense of dread washing over me when his eyes meet mine only to find all humor gone.
“And you look disgustingly happy.” We both laugh as I clasp his hand, taking the coffee he ordered for me and taking a sip.
“I’m not gonna lie to you, man, life’s been pretty decent.”
He nods, still not saying much, realizing I’ve missed him these past few weeks. The longer we sit in silence, the more the guilt permeates under my skin as I silently curse myself for being a shitty ass friend.
“What’s going on, man?” I ask, knowing there’s a reason for me being here, and a reason he looks like complete shit.
“Frankie is still pissed.”
I roll my eyes, not surprised at all, but the desperate look on Brent’s face puts me on alert because both of us are used to Frankie being a drama queen, but I have a feeling this is on another level.
“He went to the label.”
My heart stops. I knew he’d be pissed, but going to the label and tattling on me for wanting to leave? That’s fucking low, even for him.
“Seriously?” I shake my head, lowering it into my hands and taking a few deep breaths. “Was that really necessary? It’s only been a month.”
He doesn’t need to know that this month has pretty much secured my decision of not going back, instead, I want to try and build a life with Nellie and Jaxon.
“Yeah, well, apparently that’s a few weeks too many. They’re pissed, man, talking about a breach of contract.”
I scoff as he just shakes his head.
“We have one more album under contract Dane, that means it has to be made or we’re fucking screwed. You get that?”
I do get that. I also get that the situation is fucking insane. I shouldn’t be forced to do something I don’t want to do just because my record label wants some fucking money.
“I don’t care, Brent, I meant what I said in that hotel room. I don’t want this life anymore.”
God, how I wish I could go back to my younger self and warn him about this life and what it takes away. Yes, it gave me so much for a short amount of time, but at what cost?
“Dane. We signed that contract knowing full well what it meant. You can�
��t just walk away and there not be consequences.”
Fuck. I know he’s right, but the idea of leaving Nel and Jax to go back to LA only to record something I want nothing to do with sounds like my own living hell.
“What’s holding you back right now? Because I know you, and needing a break is one thing but up and quitting altogether?”
“I met someone.”
Realization crosses his features as he finally gets it. I tell him everything, from the night at the club, finding her again and asking her to live with me. He doesn’t say a thing, just takes sips of his coffee and listens.
“I’m falling hard, man,” I admit and that’s when he speaks.
“You really are going to quit, aren’t you?”
When I don’t say a word, he knows what that means. I will always love the memories we made, but there’s no way I can leave this life now that I’ve found it. I like the anonymity, the freedom, and the simplicity it brings. I’ve missed waking up in the morning and not dreading the day, and meeting Nel has given that back to me.
“I’ll figure something out,” I promise, even though at this moment I have no idea what that something is.
“You better, because as much as I love you and respect your decision, you are playing with all of our lives here, Dane. Frankie and I still love this life and so what you’re doing, although a good thing for you, fucks with our lives. Remember that.” And with that, he gets up, clasps his hand on my shoulder before leaving out the front door without another word.
Just as I’m about to leave, my phone dings, and when I see a message from Nellie, I smile.
NELLIE: Pizza and beer tonight? Jax is with Brian all weekend.
It’s the wink face that gets me off my ass, out the door, and back to the woman that has taken over every aspect of my life. I can lie and say she’s just a holiday hookup, but I’d be lying. That woman is changing my life whether she knows it or not.
Now it’s up to me to make sure that my past life doesn’t ruin the one I’m building, and that’s something I can’t let happen.
