Having that thing thundering behind me was intimidating as hell. I ran for a block and then tried to put on some speed and lose it. That didn’t work. I was a bit faster on a straight sidewalk, but I had to slow down at the intersections and it would catch up again. It didn’t slow down for anything. Fortunately, it was nighttime and there wasn’t anyone on the sidewalks and light traffic on the roads. I don’t even think a car would stop it. The car would be crushed, someone would get hurt, and it would just reform and come after me again.
After three blocks the panic subsided a bit and I found my rhythm. I couldn’t run forever but I did have a moment to think. I wasn’t completely helpless, I did have my own magic. It just took a while to work.
My magic had gotten a boost since my Waker Moment, but it was still small and weak compared to what I was seeing others do. I know I had been able to snap a magic band off the golem, but it was using my little supercharm. I couldn’t cut more bands unless I stopped and if I stopped it would crush me.
I didn’t think one of my little magic creations could take on the purple bands, either. They looked pretty powerful and sophisticated. What I could do, though, is take out the stone. It was using its stone body to run and fight. If I took that away then maybe I could survive this thing.
What I needed was my little flying miners again.
With a touch of magic I created my little guy in front of me. He had blue overalls, a miner’s helmet with a light, and work boots. He was just a little fella, about a quarter of an inch high, but I was amazed at just how real he seemed. My magic upgrade was really working. I knew that the more detail I gave him and the more physical he seemed the better he would work for me. Hopefully it would be enough.
Since he would be working with stone, I gave him goggles to keep his vision clear, and a mustache because he was going to be doing some manly work. Next came a GPS to find his way and a jetpack to get there. In a burst of inspiration, I added a little walkie talkie. That way I could continue to give him orders once his mission started. Finally, I added his green duplicator ring. It would collect what magic it could from the golem, and once it was fully charged, the miner could use it to clone himself.
Maybe I couldn’t break the purple bands directly, but the duplicator ring might be able to weaken them. Finally, I gave him his weapon of rock destruction, a diamond and adamantium pickaxe. Guaranteed to chop through anything! I brought up its spec sheet, just like an RPG game, and gave it +10 strength, +10 dexterity, +10 against earth and +1000 against golems. That didn’t really mean anything in the real world, but I wasn’t in the real world. I was in the magical world. I needed this pickaxe to be amazing and in my mind that worked.
I pumped magic into my little guy. I made him as solid and bright as I could without getting dizzy, then sent him off. He gave a happy Wheee, because that is what tiny flying miners do, and did a test lap in the air. Then he took off for the golem, trailing little puffs of white smoke from his jetpack. I followed him with my magic sight as he landed ok on the golems shoulder and set to work.
He wasn’t big, but he started chipping off tiny bits of rocks with ease. It was working!
Or maybe it wasn’t. The tiny bits of rock stayed inside the bands of purple and continued to be part of the mass that was the rock golem. A finely pulverized golem was just as bad as a blocky rocky one was. What I needed was a way to shoot the rock away from the golem. What I made was the ass blaster 2000.
I’m sure there was a better way to do it, but this seemed fun and I could already see how it would work in my head.
I started with a worm body, then gave it a big open mouth for the rock chips to go into. The middle of the body would crush the rock down and make rock pellets. On the back side of the worm I gave him powerful legs. They would be used to move the worm around, but mostly to point the back of the worm into the sky. The back end of the little guy I made a bit like a shotgun. It would cock itself, then pwew—shoot the rock pellet at high velocity into the sky. I added a duplicator ring, walkie talkie, goggles (safety first), and GPS. As a final touch I added a mustache as well, because this little fella was also going to be doing manly work, even for a worm.
My ass blaster 2000 was now complete! I pumped him full of magic too and sent him off. He didn’t go Wheee, but his mustache wiggled and his little legs pumped the air. I think he was happy. He landed next to the miner and started munching on freshly chipped rock. Nothing happened.
The miner duplicated, so now there were two little guys chipping away, and the ass blaster 2000 was still eating, but nothing was going out the back end. Finally, the legs got to work and it assumed the position. The ass pumped, and bam, a little rock pebble shot away from the golem. For a moment, it looked like the purple bands would pull it back into orbit, but it made it away clear, and now the golem had just a tiny bit less rock as part of its makeup.
Success! Now I just needed that to happen like a million more times.
It was disorienting using magic sight to see the golem behind me and still paying attention to what was happening in front of me, so I let the magic sight go for a little bit. I thought I had a winning solution and I didn’t want to foul everything up by stumbling and falling.
So, for a while I just ran. Feeling the cool night air and the hard sidewalk beneath my feet. I was in a part of the city I’d never been in before. I had no idea where I was or how far I’d gone. I just knew I couldn’t stop.
I heard the difference before I saw it. The steps behind me had a solid booming sound as the golem hit pavement. Now the booms didn’t sound as loud and the pitch went up slightly. I switched on my magic sight to check the progress.
And what progress it was! There must have been more than a hundred miners working all over the golem’s arm. Each miner was paired with an ass blaster and a rain of rock pellets was shooting off the golem.
A few blocks later there were two hundred and then four hundred pairs working on the golem. They covered his head and most of the other arm. They were taking him out from the top down.
The bands were shrinking too, and they started shifting the rocks around to keep the golem whole and running. It had started out more than seven feet tall. Now it was about six feet and shrinking.
The miners were still doubling in numbers so the work was happening much quicker. In only two blocks it was down to five feet, then four, then three. Its stride was much shorter and I didn’t have to run as fast any more. I could have outrun it at this size but there wasn’t any point. I’d let my little guys do their job.
The last rocks went super fast and the purple bands faded away. Finally, the only thing left was a smooth round black ball rolling to a stop on the sidewalk. There was no light coming off of it and the miners were ignoring it.
Instead, there was a spontaneous celebration in the air. All the little miners and ass blasters fired up their rockets and took to the sky. The night was filled with puffs of white smoke, wiggling mustaches, and more Wheees than I could count. It was indeed time to celebrate. Ding Dong the wicked rock golem is dead.
I just stood there for a long moment, breathing in the cool air, basking in the glow of life. Somehow, I’d won. I was going to be ok.
Following close on the thrill of victory was the realization that I’d just run a long way. I was sore, tired, and I had no idea how long it would take to get back home. I needed to wrap this up and head back to Annabeth.
The league of Flying Miners was still celebrating and tooting in the air. I’d learned my lesson back in Sandy’s living room, I wasn’t going to just ask them to vanish. They were filled with magic. It had started as my magic, but most of them were created from borrowed golem magic and had a slight purple cast to them.
I didn’t want to absorb all that magic directly. Partly because I wasn’t sure what the golem magic would do to me (maybe I’d turn into a stone monster myself. That didn’t sound fun.) and partly because I wasn’t sure how to absorb them in the first place. I needed to talk to Sandy before d
oing anything rash.
I felt a burning around my finger. My little penny was trying to get my attention again. I held up my hand and it uncoiled off my finger. It wiggled to the center of my palm and turned into a little egg again. It occurred to me that I couldn’t just keep calling this thing my little super charm any more. It had pulled off some amazing work for me so far and it needed a proper name.
I held it up so all my little creations could see it. “I now dub thee Penny!” I said formally. Then, since it didn’t have any shoulders, I breathed on it. Like I was giving it the breath of life.
Penny burst into light and all the miners and ass blasters paused in midair, turned as one, and bowed to the little charm.
“Penny, do you have a way to absorb all these creations?” I asked. I felt a little strange talking to my charm but it seemed to be listening.
It gave a little chime which felt like a yes.
I made a quick walkie talkie and then addressed the assembled host.
Instantly all hands and tails were raised and the Wheeeing started again. They seemed excited by the idea. I was winging things at this point so a cautious experiment was in order. I pointed to a little miner close to me. He flew over, perched on my palm, then put his hand on Penny. There was a little pop and he was gone.
“Are you ok, Penny?” I asked. She gave a little trill in reply. It sounded happy so again I assumed it was a yes.
I didn’t want her contaminated with the purple golem magic either, even if she thought she could handle it. I had an idea.
I addressed all the little people and worms again.
There was a murmur of voices as all the miners and Ass Blasters started talking to each other. I couldn’t pick out anything individually as they were talking so fast. Then one ass blaster 2000 flew to the front, opened its mouth as wide as it would go, and seemed to take a deep breath. Then it closed its mouth and you could see a tiny bump of air moving down its length. It reached the back end, which made a cocking motion, and then blew off some foul purple gas. For its size, it was the fart to end all farts, and it even made a high-pitched flatulent sound.
I couldn’t help but laugh. Potty humor at any size is still funny. It seemed to have worked, though. There wasn’t any purple aura around it any more. Now one was successful, the others joined in, and soon the air was filled with thousands of purple farts.
I backed down the street to get away from the purple haze and the crew followed me, tooting all the way. Finally, it all died down and the Ass Blasters were all cleared of tainted magic. They moved off to the side and now it was the miners’ turn. Again, there was a round of high-pitched conversation and then two miners flew forward.
They lined up with each other, and then slammed their pickaxes together. Where they locked together the diamond started shining with a purple light. It flared brighter and brighter and as it did so the light became clearer. Finally, it died out and the miners were left clear of any stone-magic influence.
Now that there was a successful way to make it happen, the other miners squared off and soon the whole street glowed with purple and white light. I made a mental note to make this easier next time. In addition to communication and flight, I needed a way for my little peeps to decontaminate from any hostile magic.
Penny flared up with light again and any of the creations that had pure magic started flying over and merging with her. This went on for several minutes. I hadn’t realized how many thousands of magical constructs had come from this and it took a while to process everyone.
Finally, the last of the little people merged and Penny wrapped herself around my finger again. She seemed slow and sleepy. She had just absorbed a huge amount of power and I was worried about her. I hoped she was going to be ok.
“You did good, Penny,” I told her. “Thank you for all your help.” She gave a single trill. “Go to sleep, or whatever it is you need to do to recover. I got it from here.”
She seemed to give a little sigh and then I felt nothing more.
After all the activity, that street now felt very quiet. There were a few street lights providing illumination, but suddenly I was aware of how many shadows were around me. I’m not afraid of the dark, but after what had just happened, I was a bit on edge.
There was one more thing to handle before heading home, and that was the dark orb lying on the sidewalk. That was all that was left of the once hulking rock golem. It was a shiny black sphere, about three inches in diameter, and it didn’t appear to have any sort of power at all.
I kicked it lightly with my foot and jumped back. Nothing happened other than it rolled a few feet. I examined it with my magic sight, but it seemed completely inert. There wasn’t any glow or magic to be found. I didn’t want to touch it with my bare hands, and I didn’t want to leave it on the sidewalk, so I took off my shirt and wrapped it around the orb.
Nothing happened so I decided to look closer. I thought the surface was dimpled, but really it was covered with runes. They looked like the strange writing on the purple bands around the golem.
I took a peek at the inside of the orb, and gasped in shock. I’d seen the inside of Sandy’s rune. It had a few magical symbols inside that filled with magic and caused it to work. I wasn’t sure exactly what I was looking at, but the inside of this orb was filled with hundreds and hundreds of symbols. They were laid out in neat patterns and tiny lines connected them in a maze. This had to be a charm on a level that was beyond anything I’d seen yet. Of course, I’d only seen one other real charm before. I was so new at everything and I wondered what Sandy would make of this.
I made sure the orb was bundled safely in my shirt, still not wanting to touch it directly, and started heading north. I’d stayed on one street running south, so I just needed to keep heading north and eventually I’d be home.
I didn’t recognize the neighborhood at all, and after a half hour of walking, I still didn’t. How far had I run? Obviously being chased by a giant stone monster will cause you to lose track of distance. I walked another half hour and I was getting tired of it all. Winning the battle had felt amazing, but now I was off that high and I just wanted to be home.
That’s when I felt the cold dark breath of the grave.
I knew that feeling. It meant a remnant was getting ready to cause problems. I was out on my own, at night, in a strange neighborhood and the last thing I needed was my personal poltergeist to make an appearance.
I picked up the pace to a medium jog. I needed to get back to the House before this thing hit. It seemed to have a different feeling than the last time. This one felt a bit weaker and it was taking longer to manifest. It didn’t feel like the hurricane of force like the previous one. Instead it felt like a whisper of evil. Like someone was stalking me and they were in no hurry to pounce. After a few minutes I could see the smoke in the air. Keeping pace with me.
I also recognized my first landmark. I knew where I was and I wasn’t that far from the park. I picked up the pace even more. If I could make it back to the House then Tyler could take care of this thing. As if it knew its time was limited, the remnant manifested faster also. The night got cold, and I could see my breath. Then it got colder still. I was freezing.
I didn’t know it was possible to shiver and run, but that was what I was doing. The smoke was thick now and I could feel it sucking the life out of me. I was shaking too much to run when I saw the park ahead of me. I just needed to get Annabeth, make it through the park, and then I would be at the House. I was close.
I dropped out of the run and began stumbling through the park. I
f anyone saw me, they must have thought I was drunk as a skunk. I looked like a hammered freshman coming back from a frat party, but I was on my feet and still moving.
I got to where Annabeth should have been but she wasn’t there. Hopefully she had regained consciousness and headed home. I could see the lights of the House through the trees when I fell. I tried to get up but I was shaking too hard. The smoke whispered to me. Stay down. Just relax. This will all be over soon.
There was no way in hell I was letting that happen. My only option was to crawl, so crawl I did.
Hand over hand I drug myself closer to safety. The analytical side of myself noted that crawling wasn’t so bad. At least I wasn’t going to fall over.
This struck me as funny and I started laughing. It sounded a bit crazy to my ears, like the Joker had hit on my funny bone. This had been a rough night, but there was no way a remnant was taking me down now. I only had about ten yards left, then the road, then I would be in the front yard of the House. I was going to make it.
Then I heard a strange chattering noise. I looked up to see a huge groundhog glaring at me. I’d seen groundhogs before, and I usually thought they looked cute. Not this one. It was at least twice the size of a regular groundhog, and it glowed. This thing was magical. The chattering noise was the sound of it grinding its teeth together.
That’s not scary at all, I thought sarcastically. Usually groundhogs are defensive little creatures and they run and hide. They only fight when they are cornered and then they fight viscously. They have long claws for tunneling through the dirt and powerful teeth to bite through nuts and roots. I did not want to mess with him, especially in my condition.
I could see the smoke circling around it. I guess my remnant figured it couldn’t win on its own and was calling in reinforcements. Maybe it was making me seem like a tasty nut or a troublesome predator. Either way I clearly had Mr. Hog’s attention. I kept crawling as he made a barking noise and two more of the mammoth groundhogs showed up. They were magical too, and just as big.
Misfit Mage Page 12
