by J. L. Beck
Fight him at all costs, I tell myself. I will not let him do this. I will not let him touch me.
“I like when you fight me, baby, makes your pussy really tight.” He laughs and grabs me by my shoulders. His fingers dig into my skin as lifts me up a few inches just to slam me back to the floor with lethal force. My head bounces off the hardwood floor like a basketball. An explosive pain erupts at the back of my skull, making the room spin around me.
I think I black out for a moment, my body is numb, and it hurts to breathe. Once I’m finally able to form a coherent thought again, I notice that Lucan has ripped my shirt off and is touching my exposed breast, sucking, biting at the flesh.
I try to push him off again, but he just chuckles, wrapping a hand around my throat, squeezing till I see black dots across my vision. I feel his other hand reach down between my legs and tears start to roll down the side of my face and into my hair.
Ivan, where are you?
I close my eyes and try to let my mind drift away. I want to leave this body, forget the sick feeling filling my belly. I want to have no memories of this. Just when I think nothing can save me, that this evil man is going to take something so precious from me, I hear the sound of squealing tires off in the distance. I open my eyes and look up at the monster taking advantage of me. Luca is so busy trying to rape me he’s not paying attention to the noises around him, because he doesn’t realize that someone is coming until the front door swings open so hard I swear the whole room shakes.
I don’t have to look to know who it is that’s come to my rescue. Luca is pulled off of me in the next second. He lashes out with his hands, trying to get away, but Ivan and Roman move with superhuman speed. I cover my exposed chest with an arm and scurry backward.
Luca doesn't take more than one step before Ivan has him by the throat, slamming him against the closest wall. I get up off the floor and run down the hall, my stomach churning, my entire body aching. I can’t sit there and watch them kill him, even though he deserves it.
I hear Luca’s cries of pain as I reach the bedroom and slam the door closed behind me. I strip out of my clothes and go straight into the bathroom, turning the shower onto hot. I step into the hot spray and let the water wash every remnant of Luca away. His disgusting touch, his smell and his sweat, I want it all off of me. Erased from my body and erased from my memory.
I let the tears fall, leaning against the tile sobbing, releasing every single ounce of pain from within my body. I feel myself breaking in two, no way to hold myself together.
“Violet,” Ivan calls out to me, his voice frantic, and it makes me cry harder. I sink down onto the floor, huddling in the corner. I don’t even see or hear him enter the room, but then I feel his hands on me, pulling me into his chest. I clutch to the fabric, and cry into his chest, feeling the warmth of his body encompass mine. I suck in breath after breath of his scent, pushing the thoughts of Luca from my mind. I’m safe. I’m secure. Ivan saved me.
After a long time of holding me, he finally speaks.
“Are you okay? Did he…”
I open my eyes and look up at him. Guilt and shame fill his beautiful gray eyes and I shake my head no.
“I need to get you out of this shower and onto the bed. I want to make sure you’re okay.” He picks me up like I weigh nothing and carries me to the bed, setting me down on it gently. I lay my head down on the pillow. Other than the thoughts of what almost happened swirling inside my mind and a pounding headache, I’m okay.
Ivan’s eyes roam over every inch of flesh before he’s cupping me by the cheeks, his lips pressing against mine so softly, so gently.
“I’m so fucking sorry, Violet. I’m sorry for walking away, for leaving you here alone. If I hadn’t let my temper get the best of me, I would’ve been here, and he never would’ve touched you.”
I can live with the things going on inside me right now, the pain will fade, but I can’t live with Ivan feeling guilt and shame over something he couldn’t control. This wasn’t his fault, and I refuse to allow him to think that it was.
“Listen…” I try to sit up while talking to him but then the room spins out of control. I have to close my eyes to get a grip on the dizziness.
“What’s wrong?” Ivan’s voice is laced with concern.
“I hit my head on the floor. I think I passed out for a little while. I don’t really remember.” I lift my hand, feeling for a tender spot on my scalp. My fingertips graze over the spot, and I feel a huge bump underneath my fingers.
“All right, we’re going to get you to a doctor, right now. Here, let me get you dressed.” Ivan hurries to the dresser and starts grabbing clothes.
“You’re going to take me to see Mac?” I whimper, unable to not feel the tender spot on my head now that I’ve touched it.
“No, a real doctor.” He starts helping me into my underwear, and I almost want to shoo him away, but I’m so woozy that I actually think I’m going to need his help.
“Is that really a good idea, Ivan?”
Ivan gives me a stern look. “I don’t really give a fuck what is a good idea right now. You’re my ending and beginning, and if something is wrong with you then I’m going to take care of you before I worry about anything else.”
He finishes getting me dressed and then helps me into a standing position. Now that I’m standing and eye level with his chest, I notice that his clothes are soaked from getting me out of the shower, but he doesn’t seem to care about them. Actually, he doesn’t seem to care about anything but me right now.
“Ivan…” The words are cut off when a piercing pain shoots through my head. I squeeze my eyes shut in hopes to ease the pain but there’s no point. It feels like someone is carving deep inside my skull with a dull knife.
“Kitten, stay with me.” Ivan lifts me up yet again and carries me out the door.
“Roman! Car! Now!” he yells into the hallway and before I know it, we are outside, cool air hits my clammy skin, and Ivan opens the back door put us in the backseat of Roman’s car, his grip on me never slacking, not even for a second.
Roman enters the car just a moment later, starting it without question.
“We are taking her to the hospital. I don’t care what the fuck you have to say about it…”
“Calm down, Ivan. That’s where I planned to go anyway.” Roman’s voice sounds oddly calm. The complete opposite of Ivan’s worry-stricken tone. My eyes drift closed as I listen to the roar of the engine as Roman starts to drive.
“Open your eyes, Kitten. Don’t go to sleep,” Ivan orders.
“My head hurts… and I’m so tired,” I whine. I don't know if it’s the way Ivan is holding me against him or the soothing motion of the car but the desire to sleep overwhelms me. Maybe just a small nap would be okay?
“Violet, listen to me, you need to open your eyes. We are almost to the hospital.” Ivan’s voice is drifting farther and farther away, and I’m close to letting the darkness take over me when his next words drag me back to reality.
“Kitten, you were right. Ella is alive. You sister is alive, and she is looking for you.”
I pry my eyes open to study Ivan’s face. Did he really just say that? Is he lying? Is he just saying this to keep me awake?
“Ella?” My throat feels dry.
“Yes, Kitten, you were right all along, and I’m a fucking idiot for not believing you. Ella was at the auction just like you said. She was there to rescue you.” I can see the remorse in Ivan’s gaze. I want to ask him a million more questions. How does he know these things? How did Ella know where I was and where is she right now? Before I can get the first question out, the car comes to a sudden stop. I peel myself from Ivan’s chest and look out the window and realize that we are at the entrance of the emergency room.
“I’ll tell you everything as soon as we’re done getting you checked over with the doctor, okay?”
“Okay,” I whisper and let Ivan carry me inside.
The next two hours are filled with
such a long list of tests that I start to feel like a guinea pig in a laboratory. The official diagnosis is as I expected, a concussion, but of course, the doctor wants to keep me here overnight just to make sure I don’t have any issues, and Ivan reluctantly agrees.
Roman somehow got the nurse to admit me under a fake name. I’m not sure how he did it but I’m sure a large sum of cash was involved, either that, or he used other persuasive ways. I don’t know and I won’t get to ask him because he left shortly after he took care of the paperwork, no doubt to clean up the mess left behind in his house.
Right after they bring me in a tray of food for dinner, the door softly opens and a petite woman walks in. “Hi, Rose, I’m Lindsey, the night shift nurse. I’ll be taking care of you tonight.”
I give her a smile and watch her open the folder she brought in.
“Oh, lord, you slipped in the shower and hit your head? I swear, I don’t understand how we can send people to the moon but they can’t make it so you don’t break your neck in a tub when showering.” Her comment makes me giggle, but when I look over at Ivan’s face, he is still emotionless.
“Well, one good thing about this is that you are still early in your pregnancy, so the fall you took shouldn’t have any effect on your growing baby.”
I blink slowly, very slowly, unsure of what I just heard her say. She keeps on talking, but I don’t understand or hear another word she says.
All I hear is the word pregnancy. My first thought is that she’s got the wrong folder, wrong information or that maybe she entered the wrong room or that she is reading the test results wrong, but the more I think about it, the more I realize that I have all the symptoms.
The sleepiness, the hunger, the sudden nausea. I press a hand to my head. Stupid. I’m so stupid. I feel so dumb for not having put one and one together myself.
“Pregnant? She’s pregnant?” Ivan asks the nurse. I can't tell what he's thinking or feeling. His facial expressions are skewed.
“Yes…” She pauses, looking up at him from the folder in her hands. “Wait, you didn't know?” The nurse looks at us with confusion.
Ivan pushes up from his seat and walks over to me, taking my hand into his. I’m assaulted with a thousand different emotions. Is Ivan going to want to keep the baby? I can’t imagine he would want me to get an abortion or give up the baby, but I don’t know at this point, not without knowing his thoughts.
“My apologies, truly, I thought you knew or at least someone would have told you by now. According to your blood results, you are early in your pregnancy. Maybe five or six weeks. The only real concern is that you have low iron, so if you’ve been feeling tired often, that is why. Taking a prenatal vitamin will help with that.”
Ivan’s eyes pierce mine, and he doesn’t even look over at the nurse when he speaks. “Can you please leave us for a little while?”
“Of course,” she murmurs and walks out of the room, closing the door behind her. Once we’re left alone, I start to shake, afraid of what Ivan is going to say, of what we’re going to do.
“Why are you shaking, Kitten?”
“I-I don’t know what you are going to say to me next. I’m scared you not going to want this… want me with a baby.”
He tips my chin up to look at him. “Do you really think that I’m going to make you get rid of our baby?”
My heart bursts inside my chest when I hear him say our. “You mean you don’t want me to get an abortion?” I hate the way my voice sounds, like I’m afraid or something.
Ivan gives me a sour look. “Fuck, no. When I sunk deep inside you without a condom, I knew the consequences.”
“Then… then that means we’re going to have a baby…” My voice shakes, and Ivan smirks at me, happiness twinkling in his gray eyes.
“It sure does, Kitten. We’re going to have babies.”
“Babies?” I ask, confused, as he leans down, bringing his lips to mine. I release his hand and grip onto his shirt, wanting him, no needing him closer.
He grins. “Yes, I want you to be swollen with my babies... not one, not even two... I want us to have a full fucking house, Kitten.”
I swallow around the ball of excitement and fear forming in my throat. “You want to stay with me? After everything that happened?”
Ivan doesn’t answer me, he merely pulls me into his chest, kissing me with a passion, with a need that is unyielding. Our lips fit together like two puzzle pieces, and I mold into him, wanting to crawl deep inside of him. He pulls away just a little, our faces still so close than our noses are touching.
“I could ask you the same. Do you still want me after everything?”
“Always!” I lean into him again, continuing to kiss him like I can’t get enough of him.
He breaks the kiss a moment later, and I suck in a greedy breath, my insides shaky, my body reacting to him in the only way it knows how, with pure unbridled need. He brushes a few strands of hair from my face and cups me by the cheek, his thumb caressing my flesh, making me lean into his touch.
“We had a fight, Violet, and people say stuff they don’t mean when they fight. We’ll have many fights in this life, but that doesn’t mean I’m ever letting you go. You’re mine forever... for-fucking-ever. Nothing you ever say to me will make me walk away from you. Understand?”
I feel myself nodding without even thinking, because I know he’s telling the truth. No matter what, Ivan will be mine and I will be his. We’ve fought through the darkness together and found light on the other side. “I love you,” I whisper, nuzzling into his hand.
“I love you, too, Kitten. Now are you ready for me to tell you about your sister?”
“Yes!” Fear and excitement zing through me. I can’t imagine what she’s been through trying to find me. The fear she’s felt well wondering if I’m still alive.
“She’s alive. I don’t know if she’s doing okay or not. I didn’t get those details but from the sounds of it, she’s fine. She’s been looking for you and showed up at the auction with the intent to find you.” Shame fills Ivan’s features. “I should have believed you, and I’m sorry for that. I will never second guess you again.”
“Don’t. Will you hold me?” I ask, and he nods, picking me up off the bed, taking me into his arms and taking the spot I was just sitting in on the bed. The bed squeaks underneath his weight, and I hold in a bubble of laughter.
“What else?” I ask, burrowing into his chest, the sound of his heartbeat beneath my ear.
“The man that your sister is with is one of Rossi’s sons…” My body stiffens and Ivan runs a hand down my back, soothing the tension out of my muscles. “She’s okay, Kitten, or at least from what I can tell. Rossi has two sons. Both of them have their own illegal businesses but neither one works with or even talks to their father. Matter of fact, his sons have been trying to kill him for quite some time, almost succeeded once. I’m going to be setting up a meeting to discuss things with him, and maybe I can get him to agree to letting you see your sister.”
“I would love that. I miss her so much. I mean, even if I just got to hug her, it would make my entire year.” With his arm wrapped tightly around me, and my body cradled into his chest, I feel safe, cared for, and loved.
“Nothing is ever going to happen to you, Kitten. You carry my heart inside you and as long as I’m living, I’ll protect you from all the bad in this world.” His words bring tears to my eyes.
“You’ve been doing that since the moment I met you.”
Running a hand through my thick blond hair, he whispers, “Because I know you needed someone to watch over you, guard you… I just never expected to fall in love with you.”
“But you did?” I peer up at him, his gray eyes full of adoration, his face now relaxed, and his body at peace.
“I did, and I wouldn’t change it for the world,” he whispers, pressing his lips to my forehead.
Chapter Twenty-two
Ivan
It’s not often that I’m worried or nervous ab
out meeting someone and honestly, I’m not really
anxious because I’m meeting with Xander. I’m more worried because Violet is pregnant, and my priorities now center around her even more than before.
It’s important that I keep the peace between Xander and I, even if it’s just for Violet.
“Are you nervous?” Violet whispers, looking up at me. She’s sitting on the edge of the bed with her hands in her lap while I adjust my stupid fucking suit.
I hate wearing this shit. Since going into hiding, I haven’t had to wear one and it’s been great, but now that I’m meeting with Xander, I need to look and act the part.
“No, Kitten, I’m not nervous.” I walk over to her, wanting to take her into my arms, but I can’t because of this stupid meeting. “I just want to make sure you and the baby are okay. This meeting is to secure our future, so while I’m not nervous to meet Xander, I am nervous to see what happens.”
Violet smiles, and her smile alone has the power to bring me to my knees. Since finding out about the baby growing inside her belly, we’ve moved into our own place. It’s nothing fancy, a simple two-bedroom cottage secluded in the woods but it’s ours, and it’s close to Roman so I can still help out at the gym. I don’t know what the hell I plan to do now but I can’t go back to the shit I was doing before.
“Everything will be fine. I’m sure Xander is a nice man. I can’t see my sister being with someone who is heartless. Rossi might be horrible, but you said it yourself his sons are better than he is.”
I don’t have the heart to tell her the things Xander has been known to do. It’s better if she assumes that her sister is in the care of an angel instead of a psycho, which is what he is.
“Xander’s a criminal, Kitten, the same as me, and the same as his brother. Maybe he’s kind to your sister but at the end of the day, he always has his own interest at heart. Don’t forget that.”
“I won’t, but I like to think that we all can find our own happily ever afters. I’m sure my sister found hers in him.”
