by S J Batsford
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me?” My anger explodes, he cringes, standing there silently not saying a word.
“After everything she’s said and done. She has the fucking nerve, not only to ask to see them, but to call herself their stepmother? After everything I’ve been through because of her and you. You ask me if she can come here to see my New-born twins? You want me to allow her to involve herself in the most, happiest and special time of my life?”
I’m breathless when I’m done. My head feels like it’s about to explode. He looks shocked and ashamed. But is he ashamed of himself or the situation?
I don’t care. I can’t believe he even asked.
“I know, it’s a lot to ask, but she will be in their lives too,” his voice is pleading.
I’m so astonished I laugh.
“You think after she nearly killed them, that I would let her anywhere near them? If you want to see them, then you can. However, she will never see them.”
“Lily, come on, be reasonable here. How am I going to be able to see them if Ashley can’t? We live together, she’s my wife.”
For the first time, him calling her that doesn’t make me cringe. It’s an odd thought, but hopefully it’s a sign. Maybe I can finally move on.
Shaking off my thoughts, I struggle to stand wincing from the pain radiating through my middle.
“Be reasonable?”
“Reasonable? Were you reasonable when you left me pregnant, after making crap loads of promises, only to snog your fiancée in my living room? Were you reasonable, after everything you’d already put me through, to accuse me of sleeping with your brother? Was it reasonable of you to still ask to see our kids, after questioning their paternity? Only to desert us again, when Ashley stomps her foot? You’ve never been there for me, or our kids. Before they were born, I hadn’t seen or heard from you in months. I had to call you yesterday to let you know you were a dad.”
A nurse comes rushing in looking alarmed. “Miss, Carter, are you okay? Do you need assistance?” She looks warily at me shaking, breathless and angry. To Ethan shocked and ashen.
I cringe, realising all the nurses probably heard everything I just said.
“I’m okay, are the twins okay?” She nods, looking unsure.
“Do you want me to call someone?” She asks, lowering her voice. I look at Ethan shaking my head. I assure her everything's fine, she nods, throwing Ethan a scathing look before leaving.
Dead silence greets my ears.
“Lily, I don’t know what to say? I never meant for any of this….”
“Well, neither did I, but I’m the one stuck with the raw end of the deal. I’ve given up so much since meeting you. And now I have to watch you play happy families your wife and another child. Who are more important than our babies. And before you say anything, I’m not saying your other baby isn’t important, because he or she is. But you shoved Seb and Eliza aside when Ashley stomped her foot not once, but twice. You questioned their paternity. Then we hear nothing from you for months. Not even a text to see if they’re okay. Your brother was there through everything. The sickness, tears, appointments, scans and their birth. He was even the first to hold Elizabella.”
I see my point has been made from the look of utter devastation on his face.
“To make myself perfectly clear. She cannot come here to see my children. She cannot spend time with them. She cannot see them and she definitely can NOT call herself their stepmother. She is nothing to them. Have I made myself clear enough?”
Nodding, his eyes go over my shoulder and he pales again. Turning I see my Nan and Mason in the doorway. Both carrying balloons, teddies and flowers. And both have matching expressions of astonishment and anger.
“Where are the twins?” Nan asks, stepping into the room. Mace places, everything he’s carrying down and rushes to me helping me back into bed.
“They’re in the nursery.” My mood shifts from angry to misery, as tears fill my eyes.
“Lils, what happened? Are you okay?” Wiping my eyes, I feel like such a baby for crying.
“I’m okay, I’ll let Ethan explain what happened.” Looking at Ethan, he looks tired. Sighing, he sits down rubbing his face. Looking to me, but I’m not going to make it easy on him.
Ethan goes on to explain every miserable word.
“You’ve got to be kidding me?” Mason hisses, growing more-angry with every word out his brother's mouth. Nan has yet to speak, I think she’s in shock.
“Look, I know I shouldn’t have said anything right now, but she has a point. She’s my wife. She’s going to be there when I have the twins over.” I’m so stunned by his reply I stare open mouthed.
“I’m sorry, but you think you’re having the twins in your house overnight? With the woman who despises them and nearly killed them?”
“She didn’t mean to harm them. She apologised for pushing you. What more do you want? And of course I’m having them overnight, they’re my kids too, Lily.”
Puzzled, I look at Mace, who looks equally confused.
“What apology? She never apologised. And I know they’re your kids too, Ethan. I never forget, but if you want the twins overnight. When they’re older, you can have them at your mom’s house. Just not around her. Until then, you can visit them at our house.”
He looks gobsmacked. And if it wasn’t such a serious conversation, I would have laughed.
“Come on, Lily. You’ve got to be reasonable here, I can’t stay at my Mother’s house every time I have my kids. Ashley’s my wife, she’s not going anywhere. That plan just isn’t realistic. You’re both making my life ridiculously hard. I can’t choose between my wife and kids… I won’t.”
“I’m not trying to make life hard for you, and I’m not asking you to choose. I just won’t allow her near my kids. She’s done nothing but try and take you away from them since she found out about them.”
“No, she hasn’t. She was shocked in the beginning and reacted badly.”
“Oh, is that all. Okay, then you tell me why I hadn’t seen or heard from you in over four months, if it wasn’t her idea?”
“It wasn’t Ashley’s idea. I thought it would be easier for all of us to have time apart. Ashley needed me…”
“Wait.” My brain clears, focusing only on one thing he just said.
“You left me with the responsibility of taking care of… As you keep saying, “our” babies? Your choice?” He nods, shamed.
“You self-centred wanker. What about us? We needed you, too. I was bedridden for weeks. I’ve been scared out my mind, worrying about Seb and Eliza. Worried about how I’d cope. As everyone likes to point out my age, I’m nineteen. Your wife is in her twenties.”
“Wow. How stupid am I? You break promises, treat me and our kids like crap, question their paternity. And like an idiot I keep letting you come back, expecting you to do better, to be there, and you have the nerve to ask for more?”
“Yeah, I’m an asshole, but the reality of the situation is, I’m their dad and Ashley is my wife. And soon the twins will have a brother or sister, who I want them to know. So, we need to work out a better arrangement than this, because it just isn’t going to work.”
“Just leave, Ethan. When we’re home and settled you can visit. Alone. I want nothing more to do with you. So, you can tell your wife not to panic because, I wouldn’t want you if she hand-delivered you to my door.”
Mace and Nan seem stunned. Ethan sits there staring at me, I ignore him turning to Nan and Mace.
“I’m going to shower. Can you ask the nurses to bring the twins back? I won’t be long.” My voice is flat, emotionless.
Mace nods mutely, leaving the room. Getting up slowly I kiss Nan and slowly make my way to the bathroom, closing the door quietly behind me.
~*~
God it’s good to be home. It feels like forever since I’ve slept in my own bed. Looking down at Sebastian and Elizabella, smiling at their alertness. They’re looking around from their twin bea
nbag seat.
“Welcome home, my little cuties,” they both kick their legs happily.
No sooner have I sat down the doorbell rings. “I’ll get it. You stay there,” Mace rushes off. He has been quiet the past few days. I guess he’s still upset over what happened between me and Ethan.
“Oh, look at them…” Isabella gushes, rushing over and kneeling beside them. She’s kept her distance, probably heard about the blow-up.
“Alex isn't here with you?” I ask curiously, she pulls her eyes away from her grandchildren and looks at me. She tells me he’s in the kitchen with Mason making drinks.
I decide to give Isabella a few minutes alone with the twins. She’s amusing them with baby voices and tickling their hands and feet.
I pause in the hall, hearing hushed tones.
“I know it’s not right, but you need to talk to her. Ashley is raving mad about not being able to see the twins. What Lily said about not having them at their house just threw gasoline on the fire. She’s talking about lawyers and taking her to court for custody…”
“Whoa… Hang on a second, what grounds does she have?” Mace hisses.
“I know, I’m not happy either, but Ethan is vulnerable right now. She’s taking full advantage, trying to make him hate Lily. She’s trying to say she’s unfit and unable to take adequate care of them alone. The fact that they’re married and have a stable home won’t help if she manages to get Ethan to take Lily to court.”
I feel sick and extremely angry. If I lose my babies… She won’t love them, she doesn’t even want them, she just wants to stick it to me.
I walk into the room stone faced.
“Over my dead body will she get my kids. Who the hell does she think she is? If she thinks I’m going to sit back and let her walk in and take my kids, and play mommy, she’s must be cracked in the head.”
Walking into the living room, I grab my phone and dialling before Mace and Alex have time to step through the door.
“Nan are you busy?”
“No. What’s wrong? You sound angry.”
“Can you come to mine? I’ll explain when you get here.”
“I’ll be right there.”
I take few deep breaths, before turning to see them all regarding me with wary looks. Mace is sucking on his lip, Isabella’s not sure whether to call and warn Ethan or not.
“What are you going to do?” I look Mace in the eye so he knows I’m serious.
“Well, first; I think I’ll call your brother. Then, I think it’s time to put little Mrs, Tantrum in her place.”
When Nan arrives, she takes one look at me, seeing how angry I am and sits next to me.
After explaining what I overheard… Let’s just say, I’ve never heard her cuss so much.
I take the twins upstairs, making use of the monitors. I don’t want them hearing or sensing any anger.
I take a calming breath and I press the call.
~*~
Chapter Eighteen
“Hello?” Well, if isn’t Mrs Tantrum herself.
“Put Ethan on the phone!” I’m past pleasantries with her now.
“He’s a little busy right now, but if you want to discuss the twins I’m more than happy to talk.”
“No thanks. If Ethan isn’t available, I guess we’ll just talk through lawyers.” My sharp tone, plus the fact that I know about her threat of legal proceedings catches her off guard.
“Here he is,” I smirk at her quick acquiesce.
Nan is grinning like a fool, but his mom and Alex look uneasy and Mace looks like he doesn’t know what to do. He’s caught between his brother and best friend, poor guy.
“Lily?”
“You can put me on speaker, so Mrs, Tantrum can hear, that way I won’t have to repeat myself.”
“So, I’ve heard of your wife’s plans to try and take my children out of my care. That she thinks I’m unfit and unable to look after them alone.”
“Lily, I…”
“No. You listen carefully, because I will only say this once. I’ve had it with your excuses to last me a lifetime. Just listen and hear me loud and clear.”
“Let’s start where it all kicked off again shall we? About three days ago. Let me guess, you went home and told little Mrs, Tantrum what I said to her question, or demand to see my kids and she didn’t like it? Well hear it from the horse’s mouth lady. You are not, nor will you ever see my kids. After all you’ve said and done to them, I don’t want you anywhere near them. As for what I heard today, you want my kids removed from my care into yours? Let me tell you, it will never happen. And I’ll tell you why….
After I finish with this call, I’ll be contacting the hospital for the records of when you… Mrs, Barker, assaulted me whilst I was pregnant. Then I’m going to have a nice chat with the police and have you charged with assault. Then a lawyer will be contacted, to not only make sure you can’t have my kids, but to make a will to ensure that if anything were to happen to me, that my Nan would be soul guardian of both the twins. Now, before this morning I was willing to play nice for the benefit of our kids, but to be quite honest, I don’t think they’d benefit from being around either of you for long periods of time. It hurts me to say that and especially in front of your parents, Ethan, but since marrying her you aren’t the man I fell in love with.”
I look at all the people in the room, there expressions range from stunned to devastated and proud. Mace is stunned, Nan proud. Isabella is devastated and Alex is a mix, somewhere between proud and devastated.
“Lily, wait. I was never going to take you to court!” Ethan voice is panicked.
“Yes, we were. She’s trying to stop us from seeing your kids. She can’t do that!”
“Would you shut the hell up!” Ethan bites out and Ashley quietens immediately.
“Can I just point a couple of things there, Ash? First; I’m not trying to stop Ethan from seeing his kids, just you, and yes, I can stop you from seeing them since you’re no relation, and adding the fact that you’re a danger to them.”
“I’m their step-mother!”
“No. You. Are. Not. You’re nothing to them. You’re just a woman their dad married out of obligation.”
Her gasp makes me smile inside. I know it’s petty, but I’m sick of sitting back and playing nice.
They argue in the background, her whining about what I said and him telling her to go into the other room and let him sort this mess out.
“Lily?” His voice is hesitant, placating, trying to calm me down.
“Yep.”
“Listen, there’s been a huge mistake. I was never going to take you to court. This is just getting out of hand. Listen, I’ll do what you suggested at the hospital. I don’t want all this to be dragged through the courts. I’m sorry, this is a big mess. How did it all end up this way?” He sounds so tired, for a minute I soften.
“I wonder the same thing every day.” I sigh, sitting as everyone vacates the room.
“I never wanted this to happen. I’m sorry, about everything. I know you’ve heard it before. God, I must look so weak, being so easily manipulated by my wife. I don’t even know it’s happening until the damage is done and I’m having to deal with the aftermath. I’m not making excuses it’s just she makes it all sound so logical. Well, until she runs into the force of nature that you are.” He chuckles, making me laugh too. I can’t help it, I have a sunny disposition, mostly.
“Well, I’m a Mom now, I can’t afford to let people walk all over me anymore.” I realise my mistake as he winces. “Ethan, I…”
“No, it’s okay. I’m ashamed to admit it, but I have done that, but I never meant to. I loved you…” I gulp at his use of the past tense. Even though I’m angry and hurt at all the things he’s done, I still love him and hearing him say he loved me hurts like hell.
“Listen can we talk about this later? Your mom and Alex are here, along with my Nan, and the twins are waking up.” I manage to squeak, my throat tight.
“How a
re they? Can I come and see them please? I’ve missed so much already.”
“Ethan. I don’t know if that’s such a good idea right now. Your wife is probably pissed and if you announce you’re coming here, then she’ll flip her lid.”
“I’ll talk to her. Please, I just want to see my kids. It’s been three days already, we can talk.”
I soften, knowing a yes is coming, because no matter what, I still love him and crave seeing him. God, the moment he holds one of our babies… I melt.
“Okay, but if she causes any more trouble… That’s it.” I hear him blow out a relieved breath. He must have been crapping himself thinking I’d refuse him. I’m not the type of person who keep children from their father.
~*~
Ethan and I sit in comfortable silence, watching the twins snooze in their cots.
“This place is amazing,” he looks around at the animals and all their things.
Smiling, I nod. “Yeah, Mace and Niles did a good job.”
He looks at me, so drained and tired, I push the plush stool off the rocking chair over for him to sit.
“We shouldn’t be fighting over them, you know. This should be the happiest time of our lives,” he states, looking at them wistfully. I agree, all I want is a peaceful life with my kids.
~*~
Over the next few days we settle into a happy, tranquil routine, until Ashley has to have an induction, she’s a week overdue, so Ethan stays with her constantly. I understand, but the twins miss him, they cry every day at the time he normally arrives.
Mason gets a phone call later that evening, he’s an uncle again. The twins have a little sister, not a brother as they were told. They named her Evie Marie Barker. It’s a beautiful name, and I’m happy for him and his family.
Ava’s been around a few times. Niles more than most, he loves the twins.
Ethan has been absent for a few days, spending time at home with his wife and new daughter. Nan’s not happy, but life goes on. My days are filled with check-ups for the twins, daily Mommy duties and my writing which is coming along nicely.
