by J. L. Wilder
She cried out, thrusting against him. He grabbed her hips and fucked her hard, licking away the droplets of blood that had risen to the surface of her skin. Her arms went around his neck and she clung on, obviously wanting more.
He interlaced his fingers through hers and spread her arms wide, pushing down so hard that her hands made little impressions in the hard dirt. Her eyes were closed, her face sheened with sweat, her breasts heaving. She lifted her hips to meet him—
The world came apart. She seemed very far away, yet he could hear her crying out in pleasure—
And then, he was back, the woods were back, and he lay gasping in her arms.
After a few moments like that, he rolled away onto his back, keeping one of her hands locked in his. He gazed up through the leaves at the darkening sky above them. “Are you all right?” he asked quietly.
“I’m great.”
“The fight you heard...,” he hesitated, “that wasn’t about you. You know that, right?”
Peripherally, he saw her shoulders rise and fall.
“It wasn’t. It’s been building for a while. Since before we met you.”
“Since the auction.”
He turned to look at her.
“I talk to all three of you,” she pointed out. “I care about all three of you. I’m getting all three sides of the story.”
Even Jamie’s? He couldn’t bring himself to ask. He didn’t doubt that Maddy liked Jamie. Even now, Mark could admit that Jamie was perfectly likeable when he wasn’t being completely smug.
“We’ll work it out,” he said instead. “The pack comes first. Everyone knows that. The pack comes before any of this other bullshit. And the pack can’t survive if its alphas are fighting.”
“I guess that’s the drawback to having your authority vested in three different people,” Maddy said.
“Guess so. It’s never been a problem before.”
“Until I came.”
“Stop. I told you, it isn’t your fault.”
She nodded. He wasn’t sure she believed him.
He wasn’t sure he believed himself.
Yes, he wanted to work things out. He was sure his brothers did too. But, how could they? These weren’t superficial disagreements they were having. His brothers were questioning his morality, and Mark was beginning to see things in them he didn’t like. Jamie was too self-righteous, and Harley was too indecisive, too noncommittal. The only stance he’d managed to take was that he didn’t want them to be fighting. Very bold.
Mark would have given a great deal to make peace within the pack, but he didn’t even know where to start.
Chapter Twelve
A new routine was established fairly quickly, and it surprised Maddy to see how well everyone settled into it. Everyone still ate meals together, as if refusing to concede to the tension that had gripped the house, but as soon as their plates had been cleared, the men scattered—Jamie to work, Harley to the garage, and Mark into the woods. The younger members of the pack worked on their homeschooling with varying degrees of dedication; although, now that the house was more often than not empty of alphas, they tended to spend more time reading novels or playing cards.
Maddy had been ordered to stay inside, but she hadn’t yet felt the powerful force of an alpha’s command. She supposed that would come in due course. One of these days one of the men would order her to do something—or not to do something—and she would feel compelled to obey. And on that day, she would know that she was fully and irrevocably a member of the Hell’s Wolves.
For now, though, she was still just a guest.
Although she wasn’t compelled to obey the order to stay inside, she had decided to do so. There was still a chance—although it seemed to diminish with each passing day—that the Death Fangs might find her here. The last thing she wanted was to be alone in the woods and come upon one of them.
Besides, there was plenty to keep her occupied.
Specifically, her men.
Harley had explained the concept of imprinting to her. Although Maddy had been appalled to learn that no one had ever asked an omega what the experience felt like, she was glad to know that there was a name for what had happened. That someone had been through it before. It legitimized it somehow, and when her conversation with Harley turned physical, Maddy was only too pleased to go along with it. They made love every day that week, and in every room of the house. He found her in the pantry when she was looking for a snack. She came upon him on the porch one night, smoking a cigarette and regarding the stars, and he flicked it away and took her in his arms instead.
With Mark, it was different. Mark came to her bedroom every time he wanted her, and she grew accustomed to waking up in the night to a hand on her arm or a leg wrapping around hers. She took to sleeping naked, expecting him, eager for him, wanting him to know he was welcome.
By week’s end, Maddy felt giddy with the constant rush of endorphins. She walked around the house feeling messy and happy, and Amy gave her knowing looks whenever they were in the same room. If this was being an omega, she decided, it wasn’t so bad. This was better than anything the Death Fangs had ever given her. This was even better than the life she’d had as a child.
And then, early one morning, before anyone else was up, she ran into Jamie in the kitchen making coffee.
Maddy hovered in the doorway, anxious. Jamie was the one member of the Hell’s Wolves she had almost no relationship with. The younger pack members had grown friendly enough, inviting her to play cards with them and sharing their books when they’d finished reading them, but Jamie still treated Maddy like a stranger in the house. He was cordial, always polite, but very distant.
Now, he looked up and saw her standing in the doorway. “Would you like a cup of coffee?” he asked.
“Am I allowed coffee?”
He looked confused. “Sure, you are.”
Caffeine had always been strictly off limits before, but Maddy supposed this was something like the conversation she’d had with Harley about the chocolate cake. She accepted a cup of coffee and thanked Jamie.
He sat down across the table from her. “How have you been settling in?”
The question felt so strange that she laughed, and after a moment, so did he. “I’m fine,” she said. “But I guess you probably know that already.”
He nodded. “I guess I probably do.”
“Are you all still fighting?” she asked.
He bit his lip. “You know we are.”
“I just...feel badly about it,” she said. “Everyone says it isn’t my fault, but I feel like it is. I don’t know what to do.”
“It’s not your fault,” Jamie said. “It’s our fault. All three of us. We’ve been looking ahead to having you here with us for a long time. We’ve been looking forward to passing along our genes. And now, you’re here, and we’re doing it wrong.”
“Are you...?” she hesitated. “Are you and I still going to—?”
“What, have sex?”
She nodded.
He sipped his coffee. “I thought about it,” he said. “It’s not like the imprint is a requirement. Actually, everything I’ve read indicates that it’s really rare. So, we could go ahead, if we wanted to.”
“I would do it,” she said. “If that’s what you wanted.”
“You would?”
She nodded. “I wasn’t sure about you three at first, but...I don’t know. Things have changed. And given the way things have been with Mark and Harley, and the fact that I know all three of you wanted to have a litter together—”
“I thought you weren’t in favor of that.”
“It’s probably going to happen at some point anyway,” she said. “Considering how often they—”
He held up a hand, as if saying that he didn’t really need to know.
“Anyway,” she said, “you should be included. If that’s what you want. And I know that’s what you’ve always wanted before.”
“Yeah,” Jamie said, “but I don�
��t know.”
“You don’t?”
“It seems like...well, no offense. But it seems like we’d be forcing something that shouldn’t be forced. Harley and Mark imprinted, and I didn’t, and I feel like that’s biology trying to tell me something.”
“Trying to tell you what, though?”
“I don’t know. Maybe that my genes shouldn’t be passed on. That I shouldn’t help breed the next generation. That Harley and Mark should be the only ones to do it.”
She reached out and took his hand. “I don’t think that’s true,” she said quietly.
“No?”
“You’re an important part of this pack. You shouldn’t let yourself be held back just because of this stupid imprinting thing.”
“It’s not stupid. Whatever else it is, it’s not stupid. I see the way you look at them. The way they look at you. It’s like you’ve found your drug.”
“Okay,” she agreed, “it isn’t stupid. But it isn’t the only thing that matters either. You’d be a good father, Jamie. You have qualities the others don’t have. Important qualities.”
“You think so?”
“You’re responsible.”
“Well, somebody has to be.” He sighed. “That’s why they’re mad at me. They think all I care about is cooking the books and having the last word.”
She raised her eyebrows. “That’s what you think is going on?”
“That’s obviously what’s going on. If you’d been in the conversations—”
Maddy shook her head. “You’re too close to it,” she said. “You’re not seeing it clearly.”
“What am I not seeing?”
“They’re not mad that you’re responsible, Jamie. Haven’t they always liked that about you? When Harley talks about you, he always mentions how you take care of things he and Mark don’t know how to handle. And Mark thinks you’re a genius.”
“He does not.”
“He does. He told me.” This was a bit of a stretch—Mark had never actually said the word genius. He had, however, extolled Jamie’s virtues as they’d lain awake talking into the night, and Maddy had realized he was filled with sadness at the growing distance between his brothers and himself. Jamie’s the smart one, he’d said. I can’t believe he went off at me the way he did. I never would have thought Jamie would be the one to lose his cool. That’s the sort of shit I do, or maybe Harley. But Jamie? Never.
“If that’s not what they’re mad about, then what’s the problem?” Jamie asked her.
“They think you don’t respect them,” Maddy said.
“What?”
“They think you think they’re...well. Nothing but animals.”
“I respect them! They don’t respect me! They think I’m soft!”
Maddy shook her head. “You see? It’s all a misunderstanding. If any of you would just talk to each other—”
“We’ve talked. We’ve talked plenty.”
“You haven’t listened. You haven’t really heard anything. You’ve let yourselves get angry because you feel slighted and small, and you’re all projecting your insecurities onto each other. And none of you sees what I see.”
“What do you see?”
“You’re all wonderful,” Maddy said quietly. “You’re all amazing. Each in your own way.”
Jamie smiled slightly and squeezed her hand—
Maddy gasped as sensation swept up her arm and radiated through her body. She recognized it immediately—there was no mistaking that feeling—and her eyes darted to Jamie’s, desperate for his response.
He was clearly feeling the same thing she was—his breath had caught, and he was staring at her as if he’d never seen her before. “Oh,” he whispered.
She nodded, as if he’d asked a question, because she knew what was on his mind as clearly as if he’d articulated it. This is it, isn’t it. This is imprinting.
She would have done anything he’d asked of her in that moment. She would have laid down and let him take her right there on the breakfast table, and never mind the fact that the rest of the pack would be along at any moment. If this had been Mark or Harley, no doubt that’s exactly what would have happened. But this was Jamie, and Jamie was different, amazing in his own way, just as she’d said. And now, Jamie got to his feet, still holding her hand, and strode purposefully from the room, allowing her to trail along behind him.
She figured out where they were going once they reached the top floor of the house. This was where the men slept, each in their own room with a common living space in the middle. She’d never been here, had only heard descriptions of it from Mark and Harley. Now, Jamie led her through the living area and into one of the little bedrooms, sat her on his bed, and locked the door behind them.
Privacy. As much as Maddy had loved the insanity of her intimacy with Harley, the thrill of fear that they might be caught at any moment, there was something delicious, something decadent, about knowing she would be allowed to relax and enjoy this. They could go as slowly as they wanted. They could take their time. Even her interludes with Mark in her bedroom had never afforded her that luxury—there was no lock on her door.
And as Jamie came to her bed, she felt, for the first time since coming to the Hell’s Wolves, as though she could truly surrender to a power greater than herself.
With Mark, she had been enamored by his forcefulness and his ability to take what he wanted. She had allowed it. She had wanted it. But Mark had always been in the driver’s seat.
With Harley, they had been equals, exploring each other like teenagers, giddy and excited, neither of them entirely knowing what they were doing or where their moves would lead them.
But, with Jamie, Maddy knew, intuitively, the reins were in her hands.
It was a strange dichotomy. He was so big. So strong. He could have taken her with as much force as Mark, if he’d wanted to. But he was exceedingly gentle. He was careful, as if he thought he might break her with his touch. She was the one guiding his hands, bringing them to her body, leaning in to show him how much she wanted it.
God, she wanted it.
His face shone with awe as he peeled off her shirt. He ran his hands slowly up her sides, feeling her bare skin. Those hands were so big. His fingers circled her nipples, hesitantly at first, then with more confidence as she gasped and arched her back. She sat astride him and rocked her hips over his, rubbing against him through the clothing they still wore, wishing he would hurry up, and simultaneously reveling in this maddeningly slow pace.
He spent what felt like hours kissing around her breasts, tasting her skin, drawing first one nipple and then the other into his mouth. How could he possibly have this much control? And how could Maddy have believed, for even a moment, that she had any power here. She could have made him stop if she’d wanted, she didn’t doubt that, although the very idea of stopping was laughable. But to make him go faster?
She rolled them over, pulling him on top of her, and wrapped her legs around his hips. She pulled him down, so he was pressed against her and felt how hard he was. This must be driving him as wild as it was her. But he only smiled, bent down, and kissed along her jawline.
Finally, when Maddy thought she was going to combust with desire, he undid her pants and slid them slowly down over her hips. He kissed her ankle as he removed them, and she felt her eyes roll back in her head. Who knew she had so many nerve endings in her ankle, for God’s sake?
And now, he was kissing his way up the inside of her leg. He stopped at the knee, briefly exploring the area, before continuing up her thigh. When he reached her hip, he slipped two fingers inside her and she gasped, both overwhelmed with relief and aching for more.
Jamie worked his fingers slowly. She tried to pick up the pace, to thrust against him, but he smiled and wouldn’t give in. He kissed his way up her torso, his hand still at work, and up to her neck. Maddy was moaning aloud now, writhing beneath him, desperate to be fucked. She felt as if it had been months since the last time she’d had a man. I was j
ust with Mark a few hours ago, she thought, but already that was a memory from another life. What mattered now was Jamie—his thick, steady fingers, his smoldering eyes, and—
He stepped back from her and dropped his pants, stepping out of them as they pooled on the floor. She drank in the sight of him. How could she have ever thought these men were too hard to tell apart? They might have had the same body, but the way they carried themselves was completely different.
He covered her like a blanket, and somehow, even though she’d been with his brothers every day this week, when Jamie entered her, it felt completely new.
And the thought that came to her as he thrust slowly into her, his arms wrapped around her neck, her legs tight around his waist, was, I love you.
She loved them all.
It came to her like spring rain, washing away the horrors of her past and her trepidation about being one of the Hell’s Wolves. She wrapped herself around Jamie, drawing him in deeper, and felt her orgasm crash over her. I love them. I love them. I love them all.
Jamie’s moan of pleasure mingled with her own, and he collapsed on top of her. “God,” he whispered.
She kissed his neck, kissed his jaw, held him close, not ready for him to leave her yet.
MADDY HAD HOPED THE news of Jamie’s imprinting would heal the breach between the brothers, but it didn’t. Over the weeks that followed, they seemed farther apart than ever. She still spent time with each of them, still relished the hours they had together, and one by one, she opened her heart to them.
“I love you,” she whispered to Mark one day in the woods after they’d made love, when they were lying still and listening to the river. He rolled over and climbed on top of her again, which was all the answer she needed.
“I love you,” she told Harley as they sat on the porch after dinner, each with a cold soda and a bowl of pistachios, tossing the shells into the yard.
He grinned and tossed a shell at her, and it bounced off her nose. “I love you too.”
“I love you,” she said to Jamie, coming up behind him as he worked on balancing the family’s budget one night, massaging his shoulders and kissing the top of his head. He reached up and pulled her hand down to his lips and kissed each of her knuckles gently, then stood and took her in his arms. The kiss they shared then was one of the best of Maddy’s life.
