The noise in the chamber did not dissipate and the speaker stood, attempting to silence the house. Gerrard on cue, promptly resumed his seat, for when the speaker was on her feet, everyone must immediately be seated and silent. It took a little time for the cacophony to subside, but eventually protocol was reinstated. Bagshaw waited until there was an extended period of silence.
‘I know some of you want to leave early, and you may wish to test my patience today, but I ask the house to retain its dignity and decorum as we work to the end of a rather horrid fortnight.’ Bagshaw resumed her seat. ‘I call the prime minister.’
Gerrard continued his answer, but this time carefully explaining the many achievements of his government in health, while at the same time highlighting the weaknesses of the opposition.
Only three questions into the usual twenty, and the chamber echoed with abusive interjections and commentary from the opposition benches. Gordon was concerned about the increasingly unruly behaviour, and as the prime minister began his fifth minute, he quietly left his chair and approached the speaker.
‘Speaker, I believe you are in for a difficult time today. Best you take firmer control of the prime minister. He is obviously being provocative and misusing the no-vote agreement with the opposition.’
‘I will control them the way I believe they need to be controlled, thank you, Gordon.’ Gordon was dismissed.
Messenger again turned to Stanley. ‘We’re getting murdered here, Peter, can we move question nine forward to change tack a bit?’
‘Let’s wait to hear from the boss.’
Gerrard finished his answer and resumed his seat, looking across at Harper. ‘Had enough yet?’ he said. ‘Maybe it’s time to give someone else a go?’
A government question was asked of the trade minister regarding the negotiations with South Africa on the soon-to-be-signed free trade agreement and the house quietened. Gordon looked at Messenger and could see he seemed annoyed and frustrated with his senior colleagues. He withdrew his list from his inside jacket pocket and spread it out in front of him. He looked at the smug Gerrard and considered whether today’s aggressive posturing had anything to do with his list. He wrote a quick note and pushed a button to summon a chamber steward to deliver the message. Stewards delivered various messages during question time as members sent information, suggestions or even jokes to one another. Sometimes it was just a request for water, but mostly it was to deliver a note to another member.
The clerk, as an independent officer of the parliament, usually did not need to write directly to a member unless it was about parliamentary procedure. On this occasion, it was an idea about process, and Gordon slipped the note to the steward. He then watched as the steward made his way to another steward sitting behind the government, who delivered the note to another steward on the other side of the chamber, sitting behind the opposition, who then passed it to Messenger’s adviser sitting in the adviser’s box, who was surprised to receive it.
The staffer saw that it was addressed to Messenger, but had no way of getting his attention. She could not engage with a member of parliament sitting over the low wooden barrier across an aisle next to her. So close, and yet too far away to contact. She would have to wait until she could attract Messenger’s attention.
The trade minister had finished his answer and Harper was again on his feet at the despatch box. ‘My question is to the prime minister, and it follows on from a previous question and his subsequent answer. Is the prime minister aware of news reports today advising that Indonesia has begun breaking ground for the proposed new detention centres? How is this possible, given they are yet to receive any funding from Australia?’
‘What the Indonesians do is entirely a matter for them,’ Gerrard said and resumed his seat, ignoring the opportunity to give the opposition a metaphorical kick as he had done with his previous answers, which caught the speaker by surprise.
‘Ah, yes, the member for Hindmarsh.’ Bagshaw smiled as she called the member.
Messenger looked at Gerrard, wondering why he hadn’t bothered to respond at length as he had with his other answers. He seemed relaxed, smirking and swivelling in his chair, but Messenger knew he was always planning something.
The member for Hindmarsh asked a question of the small business minister. Minister Puopolo was now waxing lyrical about the government’s new business enterprise programs, developed to help small businesses overcome the increased administration costs due to the change from annual to quarterly reporting; small business owners hated the idea of having to report more regularly.
A frustrated Messenger jumped up, and Puopolo saw that he was coming to the despatch box to interrupt him by calling for a point of order, so he stopped talking and stepped back from the despatch box in anticipation. Messenger feigned a stop while the minister waited nervously for his interruption, but then smiled and walked past his colleagues toward his staffer, Julia Dusting, to ask a question about the detention centres. ‘Have the Indonesians actually started site works? Has that been confirmed?’
‘By our embassy, yes today. And I have a note for you.’
Messenger took the note and resumed his seat before opening it. The small business minister was showing no signs of finishing his answer. He flicked open the note and looked around the chamber to see who might be looking at him so he could identify who had sent it, but he saw no-one seeking his attention so he looked down and read:
ASK THE PRIME MINISTER WHY HE IS REQUIRED TO ADD TO THE
REGISTER OF MEMBERS’ PERSONAL INTERESTS BEFORE THE END OF THIS
PARLIAMENTARY SITTING.
IS HE OPENING AN OVERSEAS ACCOUNT?
Messenger immediately looked up, scanning faces, yet again saw no-one. He didn’t recognise the handwriting. He caught Meredith Bruce’s eye and flicked his head to indicate he wanted to talk to her. She got up, as he did, and they both walked toward the speaker’s chair so they could talk privately behind it, a secluded place away from the activity of the chamber. The speaker’s chair, its high back decorated with the Australian Coat of Arms outlined in gold leaf, was only a metre from the back wall, providing a shadowy recess for any discussions between the two managers of parliamentary business or any political combatants seeking to secure agreement on procedure during robust debate on the floor.
‘Meredith, your boss is a little over the top today. Can we tone him down a bit?’
‘I’ll try, but if you keep asking lame questions, it’s no wonder he whacks you.’
‘I can’t guarantee we’ll hold our peace if he keeps attacking us.’
‘You’ll have to, as we don’t have any voting procedures, remember? Another crazy decision by you guys.’ She withdrew.
‘I call the leader of the opposition.’ An audible groan came from the government backbenchers as they laughed and mocked Harper as he stood at the despatch box.
‘My question is to the prime minister. I direct his attention to recent media reports regarding the daily delivery of excessive amounts of flowers to the prime minister’s residence at Yarralumla and ask what the finer things in your life are costing the Australian taxpayer?’
Messenger winced; he had not agreed to the question when Harper proposed it earlier, and now it sounded even worse. There was no reason to ask such a question, but Harper wanted to try and charge the prime minister with wasting taxpayer funds on trivial daily expenses, to provide a negative about Gerrard before the by-elections.
‘Prime minister.’
Gerrard rose to the despatch box, slowly shaking his head, a mocking smirk on his face. He leaned on the box and looked back at his team, who were hooting and laughing. ‘Madam speaker, the economy is strong. We have full employment. The kids will enjoy a good Christmas this year thanks to my government’s stimulus package that will pay a bonus to every household, and yet we get this type of question, a question from a dill about a few bunches of flowers.’
Messenger jumped to the despatch box, ‘Point of order, Madam Speaker.’
>
‘The prime minister will resume his seat, the member for Gellibrand on a point of order.’
‘Madam Speaker, the chamber today is out of control and the prime minister has been the chief culprit …’
‘You will come to your point of order.’
‘It is a disgrace that we have to endure this nonsense. My point is, Madam Speaker, the prime minister used an unparliamentary term when referring to the leader of the opposition and I ask that he withdraw.’
‘The prime minister will withdraw.’
‘Withdraw what, Madam Speaker?’
‘You will withdraw the unparliamentary term.’
‘What, dill? Oh yes, how silly of me to use a term that described the leader of the opposition as a herb, when we are talking about flowers. I should have used daisy, or better yet, pansy. If it will assist the house …’
‘It will.’
‘… then I withdraw my insensitive comment.’ Gerrard was leaning over the microphone and smirking at Harper. ‘What a sad, sad example of leadership here in the parliament of Australia where we are charged by the Australian people with providing leadership on important issues. I must say, Madam Speaker, there are plenty of important issues before us, which I could list.’
‘List them! List them!’ shouted his backbench.
‘My colleagues want the list, which I like to call the leadership list. This is the list of a government doing the right thing for the Australian people and shows my government getting on with the job. So let me list just a few: we have a financial stimulus going to the people of Australia to help them at Christmas time and provide an economic lift to the many retail small businesses in Australia which will have a strong flow on effect; we have new developments in our health system to help the Australian people and those less fortunate than many of us; we have a new trade agreement with South Africa being negotiated that will add jobs and growth to our economy; we have an agreement with the Indonesians to build detention centres and protect the sovereignty of our borders … I could go on and on, but these important issues are ignored by the leader of the opposition. Does he ask me important policy questions?’
‘No!’ responded his backbench in unison.
‘Does he ask questions on the economy?’ Gerrard asked, enjoying the theatre.
‘Nooo!’
‘The house will come to order,’ the speaker tried to reduce the noise level.
‘Does he show any leadership at all, on any policy?’
‘Nooo!’
‘Order!’
‘Apparently there is nothing better to discuss than floral arrangements. Well, petal, perhaps I can provide you with a botany lesson.’
Messenger was immediately on his feet seeking the call and getting it. ‘Madam Speaker, I rise on a point of relevance. The question was about the misuse of taxpayers’ funds, which the prime minister …’
‘Order, there is no point of order. I warn the manager of opposition business, and ask him to withdraw the inference.’
‘What inference?’
‘You know very well, and I ask you to withdraw.’
‘Please help me, Madam Speaker, I am at a loss to understand the inference you seem to have thought I had made.’
‘You know full well what I am referring to, and I ask you to withdraw. Otherwise, I will be forced to deal with you.’
‘If it pleases the house, I withdraw any inference the prime minister may be using taxpayers’ funds for his own benefit.’ Messenger pushed the speaker, and the government backbench erupted. Bruce was immediately on her feet to complain, but was waved down by the speaker.
‘Order! You will withdraw, unequivocally.’
‘I withdraw.’ Messenger bowed.
‘I call the prime minister.’
Messenger resumed his seat and Harper turned to him, damning his byplay. ‘This session is bad enough without you having to antagonise them further.’
‘I told you it was a dumb question.’
‘Madam Speaker, we have just witnessed the opposition’s smears and innuendoes. Not only do they have a dud leader incapable of running a national government, but they also have a henchman, a political thug, to smear and diminish the role of the prime minister. A henchman who will play with language to imply that the highest officeholder in the land would consider defrauding hard-working Australians of their taxes. Mind you, Madam Speaker, they have not sat on this side of parliament for such a long time, they may have forgotten what it is like to be a respected leader. And I must say, Madam Speaker, they will never be on this side of the house while lightweights like that trumped-up little piece of Hogwarts’ refuse they call the member for Gellibrand consider themselves as leadership material.
‘Their leadership group is full of flakes and fakes; they are not leaders, they’re losers, Madam Speaker.’ Gerrard panned across the frontbench with a pointing finger and on cue the opposition politicians erupted, shouting and pointing back at Gerrard. The prime minister stood back feigning shocked indignation and smiled, waiting for the speaker to bring them to order.
The speaker moved on cue. ‘Order! Order! The house will come to order.’
Many respected her position and stopped shouting, but others were so fired up by the prime minister’s comments that they ignored her plea. The frontbench didn’t respond, disheartened by the verbal attack they had endured, or perhaps agreeing with the prime minister that they were weak on leadership.
The government members sat silent, knowing it was best to stay quiet during such dramatic moments in question time so the media grabs would be all about opposition rowdiness. Gerrard often performed this routine when an election was in the offing so that he could portray the opposition as unworthy to lead the country.
‘Order, the prime minister will be heard in silence.’
‘Thank you, Madam Speaker. No amount of discipline can be used to contain the wild beasts in the opposition. They do not deserve to be in this place working with my government for the betterment of the Australian people.’ Gerrard was not letting up and the opposition members again broke out in a chorus of shouting as Messenger again sought the call.
‘The prime minister will resume his seat.’
‘Go on, sit down.’ Messenger waved Gerrard down.
‘The manager of opposition business on a point of order?’
‘Yes please, Madam Speaker.’
‘Your point is? Make it swift.’
‘Relevance, Madam Speaker. While it is a privilege to listen to the prime minister’s rhetorical flourishes, none of them is relevant, and I ask you to either bring him to order, or sit him down.’ Messenger had rousing support from his backbench.
‘The prime minister will remain relevant to the question.’
‘My apologies, Madam Speaker,’ Gerrard nodded to Bagshaw. ‘As I was saying, they are not beasts. Even beasts are worthy of respect.’ The opposition erupted again. Messenger was on his feet seeking the call, and Gerrard was enjoying himself.
‘Speaker, Madam Speaker.’
Bagshaw looked at Messenger and waved him away. He didn’t move and called her again. Harper tugged at Messenger’s jacket encouraging him to sit. Messenger ignored him.
‘The prime minister will resume his seat. The manager of opposition business is seeking the call. I warn the member against any more spurious points of order.’
‘Madam Speaker, relevance, I—’
‘There is no point of order, the prime minister.’
Harper muttered to Messenger, imploring him to sit, and he eventually obeyed his leader, as Gerrard continued the assault. Messenger glanced at the press gallery high above the speaker’s chair hoping for a familiar face among the hundred seats, but could not see one.
Gerrard chided the opposition and Harper for another few minutes, while Messenger and his colleagues sat in stony silence taking it all. Suddenly, Gerrard sat down, and no-one knew whether he had answered the question or not. Certainly no-one in the opposition cared – they just wanted h
im to stop.
‘The member for Richmond.’
While the government member asked a question of the education minister Meredith Bruce about government funding for preschool children, Gerrard went to his advisers in their box to speak with Miles Fisher. ‘I think we should go for the jugular now, what do you reckon?’ he said.
‘Give it a couple more questions and allow us to ask it, so it gives you greater credibility. I’ll give it to Michael to ask.’
‘Are you sure? They look a little sore and sorry right now.’
‘Let them ask two more, bat them away quickly, and let us ask the climate change question and then your question so that you can reveal your coup de grace. The media should be ready for it by then.’
‘You’re a good man, Miles.’ Gerrard took his advice.
As he returned to his place he stopped at the speaker’s elbow and leaned in. ‘Is there any chance you can come to my suite after question time? I feel a little aroused and I need you,’ Gerrard whispered and moved on with a leer. The speaker did not respond other than to nod, but she looked a little flushed and distracted.
Messenger was rostered on for the next opposition question about road transport, and began to mull it over, trying to think of a verbal whack he could deliver the government, yet the anonymous note still lingered in his mind.
Meredith Bruce finished her answer and Messenger sprang to his feet seeking the call from the speaker, which he received. He took his place at the despatch box shuffling his papers, looking for the question.
‘My question is to the prime minister.’ Messenger paused for a moment to think through his options.
‘Come on son, what’s keeping you?’ Gerrard smiled at Messenger’s hesitation.
‘Ask your question.’ Bagshaw directed.
‘Yes, thank you, Madam Speaker.’ Messenger shuffled his papers and took the question he had covertly received. ‘Can the prime minister confirm if he is required to add to the parliamentary register of members’ interests, and if so, under what circumstances is he required to do so?’
Deceit Page 18
