“How about not. I won’t take no for an answer, Ashley.”
“That’s what got us here,” I tell him.
“Do you trust me?”
I scoff. “Hell no.”
He chuckles. “That’s fair. Think you could trust me?”
I look into his dark eyes. So mesmerizing. I wonder if our baby will have… nope. Not going to think about it. Can’t think about it. What is wrong with me? His eyes hold sincerity when he looks at me and I can’t help but feel like whatever he’s about to guide me into, isn’t bad at all. I might have only spent a day and a half with him, but I do know a good man when I see one. He’s one of the good ones.
Nik gets right up in my space and slides a hand from my elbow to hand. “Ashley. I would never, I mean never, do anything to hurt you. I wouldn’t put you in a position that I think you’ll be uncomfortable. I promise. Trust me?”
The feel of his hand on mine sends shivers through my spine and for whatever reason, I believe him. I find myself nodding in agreement and he smiles just a little bit, taking the pregnancy test from my hand and tossing it into his cart along with Mrs. Maxi Pads’s pads. Then he looks at the shelf where I was just contemplating which pregnancy test to get and proceeds to grab one of every other brand, throwing them in with the rest of his haul.
“Ready?”
“I have no idea.”
“Yeah, me either,” he admits. Then he’s shooting off a text to someone, probably Mrs. Pads to warn her that his potential baby mama is joining them for a night of fun and festivities. Oh lordy, if I ever say or think the term baby mama again, just slap me back to reality. When he’s finished, he slips his phone back into his pocket and places a hand on my lower back. The comfort it brings me is dangerous but I don’t want to step away and make him feel bad.
There’s absolutely no logic in me going with him wherever he is wanting me to go. But for the life of me, I can’t seem to say no to him. Obviously. Geesh, it’s not like my willpower is all that strong with this one anyway but this is ridiculous. I’m going to chalk it up to nerves. That’s the only explanation that could possibly make sense right now. I simply didn’t want to be alone when I took the test to find out if my life is forever changed so I accepted his offer slash demand to go along with him.
Rolling my eyes at my own inner-turmoil, I move out of his way so he can push the cart and feel a mixture of relief and disappointment that we’re no longer touching.
It’s just that I’ve never felt this turned on, for lack of a better word, in the presence of another man before. Nik does something to me, making me crave his touch. It’s more than just attraction. It feels like something I could become addicted to if I’m not careful. Since he’s buying feminine products for another woman, it’s safe to say he’s taken which means I need to be extra careful.
I stop walking and tug on his coat sleeve to get his attention. “You know what? Let’s just exchange numbers and I’ll let you know what I find out, okay?” I ask, my pleading tone heavy in my voice. He can’t miss it. I no longer want to go wherever he’s going so I can sit by and watch him and his girlfriend together while I’m finding out if I’m carrying his baby. This isn’t Jerry Springer — it’s real life. And that scenario won’t work for me.
He guides me into a side aisle so we’re not in the way of the shoppers’ traffic. Probably smart. Not a great place to have a conversation such as this one, anyway. “What do you mean?”
I wrap my arms around my stomach and his gaze follows. His eyes stay glued to where our baby could be forming behind my arms and I shift nervously on my feet.
“It’s just that this is already a lot to take on and I don’t think it will be good for me to go wherever you’re wanting me to go. I’m already stressed out enough and I need to be alone.”
“Ashley,” he pleads but doesn’t say anything further. He stares into my eyes hoping to find something that will give him a clue as to where my head is at. But the thing is, I’m telling him the truth right now. I do need to be alone and this entire situation is stressful. I want to go home where I’m comfortable and be surrounded by my stuff, the smell of my house, make a giant bowl of fettucine alfredo and maybe take a bubble bath afterward.
“It’s okay, Nik. You have plans tonight already.” I reach into the cart and grab all the pregnancy tests, dropping one because my arms are full. He bends to pick it up and keeps hold of it.
“I can change my plans, Ashley. This is… I want to be there for you.”
“And you will. If it’s positive.”
“But…”
“It’s fine, Nik. You go do your thing and I’ll,” I hike up my haul of tests and nod down the aisle toward the checkouts, “… I’ll just do my own thing and let you know, yeah?”
“I don’t like this,” he admits.
Yeah, well, neither do I. Never did I imagine that I’d be a thirty-three-year-old woman with a possible pregnancy with someone I literally have only known for a couple days, most of which we were both drunk. Doesn’t exactly say much for my character.
“It’s okay. It is better this way, you know? I’ll let you know, though.”
“You don’t have my number,” he reminds me.
“Oh. Um.” Looking down, I have no idea how I’m supposed to manage to fish my phone out of my purse. “It’s, well, my phone is in my purse. Can you help?”
“How about you just tell me your number and I’ll put it in my phone here,” he offers, holding his own up.
Right. That would be easier than him having to search through my purse for my phone for sure. He probably also wants to make sure that I follow through with the whole letting him know if I’m pregnant thing. It’s not like we know each other all that well to know if the other is trustworthy yet. And look at me, possibly having a baby with the man.
I rattle off my number and he plugs it into his phone. From inside my purse, I hear it ping with my text sound and he grins. “Got it. Do you, uh, need anything, though? I feel really weird just sending you away by yourself.”
“Don’t feel bad. Besides, you’re hardly sending me away. If anything, I’m sending you away. It’s just that I know I’ll need time to process whatever the results are and let’s be honest, we really don’t know each other well. I’ll feel more comfortable doing it alone.”
“Promise me that if you get home and you realize it’s too much that you’ll give me a call. I sent you a text so my number is in your phone now.”
It’s really sweet that he’s being so caring. Not that I expected anything different from him. The time we spent together, drunk or not, he was considerate and thoughtful. But if he is going to maintain this level of kindness, I’m going to have to build some serious barriers to guard my heart against him.
“I promise.”
Nik watches me for a few beats then pulls me in for a hug. It’s not sexual or even intimate, however, it is almost too much for me to bear. My emotions are all over the place and this hug feels really… nice. Too nice. It’s what got us into this whole mess in the first place.
I step out of his warm embrace and give him a small smile, hoping it doesn’t tremble or come across like I’m about to burst into tears.
“You okay?” he asks and I nod, not fully trusting my voice not to betray me.
My stomach is in knots and has been since my missed period. I’ve always been very regular so even a day or two off is strange for me. Ten days? That’s unheard of. Deep in my soul, I know I’m pregnant with his child but until I have confirmation of that, I don’t want to continue to shake up both our lives.
I definitely, definitely, do not want to be in the middle of a love triangle between him, Mrs. Maxi Pads, and myself. That’s something I won’t do.
“I’ll talk to you in a bit, then, yeah?”
I raise my eyebrows at him and he shrugs a single shoulder. “In a bit, huh?”
“Not sure about you, but I’m pretty eager to find out the results and I’ve only known about this possibili
ty for a few minutes. Can’t imagine how it’s been for you, knowing this for days now.”
“It hasn’t been a picnic,” I admit.
“Bet not.”
“Okay, well, I guess it was lucky I bumped into you tonight, huh?”
“Lucky or some higher power making sure we were in the same place at the same time,” he suggests.
Hmm. If God had a hand in orchestrating the two of us to wind up in the tampon and pregnancy test aisle at the same time, I do believe He has quite the sense of humor.
Chapter Six
Nikolas
“She might be pregnant.”
“Come again?” my sister asks, digging through the bags of groceries that I brought over tonight. She begged me to stay at her place through the holidays and I finally caved. Her husband, Dean, is now one of my best friends so spending time with them isn’t exactly a hardship. Plus, she’s about a million months pregnant and super crabby — not that I’d ever say that to her face — and I didn’t want to set her off.
She finds the box of glazed doughnuts I snatched up on a whim and her eyes light up. Setting it down in front of her at the table, she opens the box and leans over, inhaling the sticky sweet scent of deep fried goodness.
“You gonna just dive in or eat one like a civilized human?”
She glares at me and lifts one out of the box. “Not that I care what you think of me, but I figured I’d better at least take it out of the box.”
I shake my head, laughing, and continue putting some groceries away. Dean would do it but he got called back into work tonight because of the snowstorm. He works for the city and in the winter, he helps make sure the roads are clear of snow and spreads salt. He’s a fucking gem of a man. And not just because he puts up with my sister’s shit, but because he practically raised his siblings when his dad ran off and his mom had to work three jobs to support the family. As the oldest, he stepped up to the plate and finished high school a full year early. Rather than even considering college, he went straight to work.
He’s what I strive to be as a man in general. Loyal, hard-working, caring, humble as a person can be, generous, and fiercely protective of his family. Dean would do anything to ensure his family was not only safe, but also happy, healthy and thriving and now that he and Josie are expecting one of their own, that protectiveness has only quadrupled. There was a point right after they found out she was pregnant after having two miscarriages where it felt like it could become unhealthy, but he reined it in after they hit twenty weeks.
Now, he’s working himself to the bone to make as much money as possible, go to every doctors’ appointment Josie has, building the baby a crib by himself, and remodeling certain rooms in the house. I don’t know how he’s not exhausted, but every time I talk to him or see him, he’s smiling and thrilled as can be that he has the privilege to do what he can to make his family’s life great.
Not to mention, he loves my sister fiercely. He’s a mountain of a man and she’s an itty bitty thing. They look like an odd pairing at first glance, but that’s where it ends. One look at the couple together and it’s impossible to miss the love they share.
If I can pick up groceries and other essentials and help out a little around here with little things to take the burden off both of them, I’ll do it. They deserve it.
“You gonna leave any of those doughnuts for Dean?”
“Verdict is still out on that one,” she mumbles around a mouthful of food.
“Such an asshole.”
“He knows the deal. You snooze you lose around here.”
I raise my eyebrows at her as I put some ground beef in the freezer. “You mean, since he’s working his ass off to clear the roads he doesn’t get to eat doughnuts?”
“Right.” She grins, licking the glaze off her fingers. “Did you get the maxi pads?”
“Yeah. But why do you need them, anyway?”
“For after the birth.”
“Enough said.”
“So… this girl might be pregnant?”
Even though it’s scary as hell and inconvenient as fuck, I smile. “Yeah. I think so. I saw her at the store while I was buying your pads and I’m pretty sure she thought they were for a girlfriend or something. She started acting a little shifty about it. I should be hearing from her tonight whether or not your little guy will be having a younger cousin by about eight months.”
“You’re smiling,” she says, standing up to help me put the rest of the meat away in the freezer then squeals when she sees I picked up not one, but two Party Size bags of Cool Ranch Doritos. Something she’s been craving the entire pregnancy. Seeing the snacks makes me wonder what kinds of food Ashley will crave, if any. It also makes me wonder if she’ll allow me to be there for her.
“Not the worst thing that could happen,” I admit.
“You don’t know her,” she reminds me gently, putting away a box of pasta.
“Don’t I?”
She gives me a look that I’m sure will one day remind her children who’s boss but it does nothing to me. “All I know is that I felt comfortable around her and when I saw her at the store today, I was… I don’t know, happy. It was good to see her.”
“Even though she told you that she could potentially be pregnant with your child?”
I flinch. “I know. I know. That was definitely unexpected and actually pretty scary. My gut instinct, though, tells me it’s a good thing.”
“You’ve always been one to follow your gut,” she says.
“But it hasn’t always led me in the right direction,” I remind her.
I pull the pizza box out of the oven where we had it keeping warm and we take it with us to the living room, Josie carrying a can of Coke for me and one of Sprite for her. She’s held off on drinking even an ounce of caffeine since they started trying to get pregnant but she says sometimes she needs something fizzy, especially when she’s eating pizza.
“Want to watch a movie or a show?”
“Movie.”
“Good. I was hoping you’d say that.”
With a slice of pizza raised in my hand, I pause, noticing her grin and tone of voice. “Josie. No.”
“It’s Christmas.”
“It is not.”
She huffs. “It is in two days. Please? Come on, Dean never lets me watch it and I feel weird watching it alone. I need someone to banter with! You know you love it.”
“I do not.”
“Okay, maybe love it is wrong but seriously, Niko. I’d love you forever and ever!”
“You already do,” I tell her, smiling wide and taking a giant bite of the cheesy goodness. Normally I go for a lot of toppings on my pizza but Josie was begging for one with only extra cheese and honestly, it didn’t sound awful.
“Maybe I’d love you even more. How can you deny a pregnant lady her last wish?”
“You dying and forget to tell me?”
She places her hand on her stomach and sits back in the couch, groaning and making a huge spectacle. The entire pregnancy she’s been incredibly healthy and goes to yoga classes to keep her body in shape. But right now she’s lying back like a wounded animal. If I didn’t know her well, I’d feel guilty for rolling my eyes.
“You’re so full of it. You’re so dramatic.”
She throws her hands up. “You don’t know me!”
I bark out a laugh. “Ha! Right. Let’s try that bullshit on someone else, shall we?”
She quickly covers her stomach. “Watch the language around the little one!”
“Again. You’re so full of it. Just last night I heard a cocksucker slip out while you were cooking supper. You can’t bullshit a bullshitter, Josie. No fucking way you’re making me sit here and watch White Christmas with you. If I have to listen to that damn ‘Sisters, Sisters’ song I’ll gouge my ears straight out of my head.”
“Now who’s the dramatic one?”
“Let’s watch Die Hard.”
“I hate you.”
“No, you don’t. Die H
ard’s the best Christmas movie there ever was and you can’t even deny it.”
“But…”
“But nothing. You’re not going to manipulate me.”
“You’re going to be a terrible father.”
“Correction: I’m going to be a fabulous dad because I won’t let my kids walk all over me.”
Her eyes instantly well up with tears and she puts her plate of pizza down on the coffee table, scooching closer to me. Josie wraps her arms around me as she sniffles. “You’re right. You’re going to be amazing. I’m just crabby and emotional and want Dean home instead of out on the roads so I’m picking a fight.” Then she mumbles, “I don’t even like White Christmas all that much.”
She’s so emotional lately. I have a really hard time not giving her shit about it but I don’t want to add to it. “Liar. You love it.”
She cries out loud, huffing her annoyance. “I really do. It’s that darn Danny Kaye! And Bing Crosby’s blue eyes. And Rosemary Clooney. And even that skinny one, Vera-Ellen. I mean, she needed to eat a couple cheeseburgers but I just love them all.”
I fold her into my arms. “You’re right. You are emotional. But your tears aren’t going to work on me.”
She’s silent for a moment before shoving away from me. “You suck.”
I smile at her. “Yet you still love me.”
“Verdict’s out on that one. Compromise and watch Home Alone with me?”
“Yeah. That works.”
She takes the remote and starts flipping through their streaming services before finding the one she’s looking for that is showing Home Alone and starts it up.
We keep eating the pizza and I go to the kitchen to pop some microwave popcorn while the McCallister family sans Kevin is running through the Chicago airport.
I’m about to rejoin her in the living room when the door to the garage opens and Dean comes in, kicking off the last of the snow on the bottom of his boots.
“Hey, man. Go okay?”
“It was a bitch. That ice sucks to cut through. Few people had gone in the ditch right outside of town and there was one lady who’d tail ended another gal.”
Together: A Surprise Pregnancy Romance Page 5
