by Brynne Asher
I pull her to the door where my nephews are jumping up and down waiting for us.
Chapter Thirteen
The Ugly Road
Leigh
“Hurry up with the key, sweetheart, I’m gonna drop the salsa.”
“I’m coming, sorry.” I climb the stairs to get to the door of my new apartment where he’s waiting while balancing Mexican take-out with four bags of groceries dangling from his arm.
I’ve got another three bags of groceries, along with my dress from the wedding and overnight bag. My overnight bag that’s getting more use than it should lately going between whatever bed Tony and I decide to sleep in. It’s past dinner time and we’ve had a busy day.
After meeting Finny—who honestly, is the sweetest puppy ever and even though I know what Tony is doing by getting a dog, there’s no way I can be mad at him anymore because I’m going to love Finny way too much to hold a grudge—we went to the pet super store and spent too much money. Noah and Cayden came with us and Tony let them pick whatever they thought Finny would like. He’s going to have more toys than any puppy could ever play with. I got into the fun as well and chose collars, leashes, doggie shampoo, and a dog bed. The bed is too big for him now, but he’ll grow into it. It’s chenille in the perfect color of grey with a smoky blue piping. I’ve decided not to think about why I picked that specific bed and told Tony it was the perfect color for a boy. Heck, I won’t even admit to myself why I picked that color—even though it’s because it matches Tony’s house perfectly and I’ve come to love Tony’s house way, way more than I want to think about loving his house. Tony put himself in charge of choosing an enormous dog kennel, stating resolutely, “He’s gonna be big. He is not sleeping with us.”
After our Finny shopping spree, Noah and Cayden wanted ice cream, so off we went. Cayden, being four years old, made a hellacious mess of his waffle cone and was blue from his nose to his waist with Birthday Cake flavored ice cream. I guess kids mature into ice cream eating somewhere between four and six years old because Noah only made a mess from his nose to his chin and was much easier to clean up. They were hilarious, ornery but cute, and talked a mile a minute sitting across from Tony and I in the booth at the ice cream shop.
Once Cayden was mostly mopped up—he still had blue stains all over his shirt—we took the boys home and Sophia didn’t blink an eye when she saw him. She jabbered with me, never breaking eye contact while whipping his shirt off and tossing it toward the laundry room while holding little 5-month-old Isabella on her hip who was pulling her hair the whole time. She’s honestly the definition of a multi-tasking mom.
We stayed to gab with Sophia and Lanny for another hour. I looked over at Tony when he had started to play with the ends of my hair where we were sitting on the sofa. His gaze swept my face, but when he finally looked into my eyes, his were heated in a way I knew exactly what he was thinking about. When he announced, “We need to go,” I couldn’t help but smile because by the look on his face, he was remembering last night and this morning. There was no way I could resist the look. Of course, I agreed and off we went.
Tony wasn’t happy when I told him I had no food at my new apartment so we had to stop by the grocery store. His face went tight because I can promise you this, he did not look like he was in the mood to go grocery shopping. I honestly have no idea what’s in my seven bags of groceries, because Tony dragged me through the store at the speed of light.
Once we loaded the groceries, I mentioned I was getting hungry so Tony asked, “What are you hungry for?”
“What do you want?”
“Leigh, you’re the one who said you were hungry. Tell me what you want.”
“I’m good with whatever you want.”
“Leigh, answer the question,” he pushes.
“Tone, I don’t care. You pick,” I mumble into my purse, digging around for my lip gloss.
That’s when I feel him hit the brakes and make a quick turn into a deserted parking lot. I look over to him as he stops the car and throws it into park. Looking around, confused as to why we are parked crooked in the middle of an empty lot at a business complex. “Why did you stop?”
Tony unlatches his seat belt and turns fully to me, his left hand shooting out to catch me behind the neck pulling me close to his face.
“Tony! What are you—” I start before he interrupts me.
“That is not us,” he states.
“What do you mean?”
“I’m not him.”
That statement shut me right the hell up and my breath catches.
His next words come out hushed, “You’ve come a long way, gem. You gave me you last night and, in the process, told me you were happy. You know I love you, but what you need to learn and what I’m gonna teach you is when you love someone you care what they want. I care that your work makes you happy. I care that you want a dog and want to give you one because you’ve never had one before. I care that you want to sleep in your new apartment because it’s yours and that means something to you even though I’m not happy you got an apartment, so we’re sleeping there tonight. Even though it’s a clown car, I care that you have what you want even though it makes me crazy and I want you in something bigger. And gem,” he says pulling me even closer so I can feel his breath on my lips. “When you want something to eat, I care that you have what you’re hungry for.”
My tears form and I see he sees them too even though the sun has almost set and the low light from the late winter day is all we have filtering in around us. The muscles in his hand tense at my neck and open my eyes to look at him.
His hushed voice continues. “Sweetheart, I am not him. Whatever he conditioned you to do, I’ve gotta work that out of your system. I’ll stop the car and get in your face about it every time if I have to. But one day, you won’t have to think twice, you’ll know that I care. I care about what you want and I want to give it to you. I am not him. That is not us. That is not what we are building here. Do you get me?”
My tears spill over and I nod.
“Okay, now that we’ve got that straight, you’re hungry. All we’ve had today is breakfast and ice cream. I want you to tell me, gem, what do you have a taste for?” His eyes sear into mine, communicating the importance of his question.
I pull in a trembled breath. “Spinach enchiladas and cheesy potatoes.”
His other hand comes up and his thumbs swipe my face as he holds my head in his big hands. “Then that’s what you’re gonna get.”
He pulls me in to him and presses his lips to mine, lingering into a perfect kiss. He barely pulls back and says against my lips, “Call it in so I can feed you. I’ll have the tilapia.”
I nod again, trying to swallow over the lump in my throat and control my emotions. He pulls me in for another kiss, lets me go, belts up, and pulls out of the parking lot.
I do my best to gather myself and google the number for my favorite Mexican restaurant. I’m able to pull it together enough to order our dinners for take-out while Tony grabs my other hand giving me a squeeze.
I disconnect the call and feel Tony pull my hand up to his mouth to kiss the tips of my fingers. “Love you, gem.”
I don’t have the courage to respond in any way. But I do squeeze his hand back and he looks over at me. All I can manage is a shaky smile in acknowledgement. He gives me back his smile, warm and steady, just like always. I look back to the road and do my best to let all of what he said settle over me, scaring me all the same.
I feel different. I act different. I think I’ve come a long way. But I don’t even realize what I’m doing half the time because it’s become my nature out of necessity to survive during my years with Preston. Tony calling me out on it is as scary as Tony recognizing it, but Tony doesn’t miss much when it comes to me. This should not continue to surprise me, even though it catches me by surprise every single time.
Tony leaves me to my thoughts as he goes in to get our dinner and then drives straight to my apartment. Recovering from my
drama, I’m pulling up the rear as Tony waits while I dig for my keys. I fumble with my purse, groceries, and keys, reaching around him to unlock the door. “Go on in. You’ve got the food.”
Tony pushes the door with his foot, heads in and I follow. But I’m still trying to shuffle everything around in my arms when I run into the back of Tony who’s stopped inside my doorway. “What the fuck?”
“Tony—?” I start to step around him, but he keeps talking.
“Stay where you are.” His voice is rough and demanding. “Why in the fuck are you here and how did you get in?”
At the sound of Tony’s voice, I stop ridged and move in close to the back of him. I peek around him at the same time I hear the familiar—but not welcoming—voice for the first time in many years spill like venom. “Well, well, well. What do we have here?”
“Mom?” I whisper.
But there’s no question.
There she is, Sheila Johnson, in all her glory. My mother, sitting on my sofa, scooched down like she’s in the middle of watching a movie and was settled in for the night. I haven’t seen her in three years since she moved to South Dakota with the last idiot she tied herself to. Her hair is blonde, but fake, and she’s about eight weeks overdue of needing her roots done. Dark circles surround her brown eyes, and the lines around her mouth are deeper and more set than they were the last time I saw her. Her face and voice show the signs of a smoker even if I didn’t know she was one my whole life. She’s tall, my height, but I can still see her frame is thinner and bonier than normal. She looks way older than she should for her fifty-three years—her lifestyle taking a toll on her body. Her clothes are skanky and tight as usual, not a good look for anyone, even on a more youthful skank than her.
Once Preston and I were married, he made no bones about how he felt about my family, which is probably one of the only things we ever agreed on. He made certain she and my sister knew they weren’t wanted in our house, just one more unpleasantry I had to deal with.
“Always knew,” she strangely starts.
“What are you doing here?” Tony asks, not caring what she’s referring to.
“Always knew you were no better,” she elaborates.
“How did you get in here?” Tony keeps on.
She ignores him. “Always thought your shit didn’t stink. Always acting high and mighty, with all your fancy-ass friends and going to college, gettin’ yourself a hospital job. Then you landed a rich husband, livin’ in a big ‘ole fancy house. But you’re no better, just like I always knew.”
My heart is beating through my chest listening to her spew her words—words I’m used to hearing from my mother. I glue myself to Tony’s back, but I feel him move, bend at the waist to dump our food on the coffee table between us and my mother. Dropping the groceries to the floor, I feel his hand come to my lower hip and thigh holding me back at the same time holding me tight to him.
“I’ll ask you one more time, and you’d better start talking to me instead of Leigh. How in the fuck did you get in here?”
“You’re new.” She looks Tony up and down, ignoring his question again.
“I don’t care that you’re Leigh’s mother. I’m calling the police in two seconds if you don’t tell me how you got into this apartment.”
“I’m her mother,” she states the obvious. Then she smiles saccharine sweet, going on. “Her loving mama who hasn’t seen her in years and wanted to surprise her with a homecoming visit and the nice maintenance man let me in.”
I feel Tony’s body tense and I’m instantly nervous for the maintenance man.
“How did you know where she lives?” Tony bites, barely controlling his rage.
All of a sudden, my mother starts feeling cooperative. “Well, even though I don’t know who you are, or the fact that my daughter is now divorced.” She slices her stare to me. “I went to your home. The home you shared with who I thought was your husband, but now I know isn’t your husband anymore. He was the one to tell me my daughter is now divorced and I could find you here,” she flips her hands around my tiny studio apartment. “Is this all you can afford after being married to that rich man?”
I ignore her last comment because I have to grab the back of Tony’s jacket and hold on to stay standing. I thought I felt rage emanating from his body before, but nothing compared to now. I pull myself to him, still holding my tote, three bags of groceries, and my dress now squished between us.
“Tony,” I whisper.
“He knows where you live,” Tony bites, looking to the side and down to me.
“Tony—” I keep on, my voice strangled.
“He’s watching you. He knows where you live, even though you just moved in and there’s a restraining order,” he continues, stating the scary facts that are obvious to me with his face set in stone and rage billowing.
“Tony?” my mother asks, as she lowers her feet from my cool coffee table Gabby refinished for me. She leans forward as if she’s taking a good look at the man I did the deed with last night. Putting her elbows to her knees, she continues to spew her venom. “As in, Carpino?”
“Mom,” I start.
“You’re with a fucking Carpino?” she says in a malicious voice.
That’s it. I immediately start to pull around Tony, letting go of him to spew right back at her. “Don’t you dare!”
But Tony grabs me at my waist before I can make it around him and pulls my back to his front. He takes a step back as my mother starts in with her normal hate. “Always the Carpinos. So fucking perfect. I never stood a chance up against The Gabrielle Carpino with her perfect parents and family. ‘Gabby this, Gabby that,’ for fucking ever! And you left your husband for him?”
I throw everything in my arms to the floor, doing my best to get out of Tony’s hold so I can rip my mother’s hair out. I forget about her breaking into my apartment and the scary fact Preston must be keeping tabs on me. I can’t think of one thing besides her spewing her hate and venom about Tony, my friend, and their family who have shown me nothing but compassion and love, not to mention, I hate the fact Tony has to share the air she breathes.
But a second arm locks around me as Tony holds me in a vice. Before I can think of what to scream and yell at her, Tony starts in. “Why are you here?”
She looks at Tony and then back to me. I see her swallow and purse her lips together. “Tina’s in trouble.”
My body slumps in Tony’s arms.
Tina. Of course.
My stupid, stupid sister.
“What trouble now?” I ask.
“She scared. Says she has people after her. Says she needs money to pay them off,” my mom explains, looking uncomfortable for the first time since we walked in after she broke into my apartment.
“You mean she owes her dealer money?” I surmise. “Unbelievable. You came all this way and think you’re going to get money out of me to pay off my sister’s dealer? What’s it for this time? Is she still a ‘recreational’ user or has she moved on to the big stuff? Huh, mom? Prescription drugs? Blow, acid? What’s she into now?”
“She needs help, Leigh-Leigh.”
“Don’t you dare call me that. I can’t believe you came to me for money, and for drugs of all things!”
“She said this is it, Leigh. She said she’ll get help—she’ll quit.” My mother’s voice starts to panic.
“Right, I’ve heard that before,” I say.
“Get out,” Tony demands. “She’s not giving you a dime. Get out now.”
“But I don’t have anywhere to go.” She starts talking directly to me. “I’m staying with you, Leigh.”
“There’s no way you’re staying with Leigh,” Tony stresses.
“Leigh, you have to help her,” my mom starts to plead. “I asked Preston, but he said you got plenty of money in the divorce and sent me on my way. She’s scared. You have to do something.”
“I’m not giving her money,” I say.
She throws her arms out. “What else is there to do?�
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“You can stay here,” Tony butts in. I turn to look up at him, not believing what he is saying, but he lets go of me, moves me back and steps in between my mother and me. He turns to me. “You’re coming home with me. She can stay here.” He looks back to my mother as he digs his wallet out of his pocket. “Is Tina still in Florida?”
“Yeah, near Destin,” she answers, looking relieved she isn’t being kicked out.
Tony sighs and pulls his business card out of his wallet and shoves it toward my mother. “My cell is on this card. You get Tina’s information to me. Then you communicate with me, not Leigh. You get that? I don’t know what we’ll do, but Leigh is not paying off a dealer. We’ll come up with something. You can stay here and eat this food, but that’s it. If Leigh doesn’t want to see or talk to you, she won’t.”
“What are you going to do?” My mother panics.
“Get me her information, anything you know about the situation. Text it to me. I’ll be in contact with you tomorrow,” Tony says. He leans down to pick up our dinner and turns to me. “Get your bag, sweetheart, but leave the groceries here with her and give her your key.”
I don’t pick up my bag because I can’t move. I stand here and stare up at him. I cannot believe my mother is here and she wants money to pay off my sister’s drug dealer. How did this happen? I just had the best weekend of my life and it ends like this?
My freaking family, so screwed up. They found a way to mar what should have been the most precious memories I’ve ever had.
“Gem,” Tony calls. I focus on his face as he leans close. “Let me take you home.”
I woodenly bend to pick up my bag, toss my key to the coffee table, and barely look at my mother who is now carefully surveying Tony and me. I move to the door with Tony behind me. Without another word, we leave, Tony pulling the door shut behind us and walk away from my new apartment. I go directly to the passenger side of Tony’s Explorer, he beeps the locks and I climb in. He’s right behind me standing in my open door, hands me the Mexican take-out and lifts his hand to my cheek. Not saying a word, he steps back and swings my door shut.
