by Emma Cole
“Ashton.” I tip my chin at him, the best I can manage without bodily harm. He, or any one of them, could have stopped Damien. I start counting my breaths, in and out, as unobtrusively as possible. Worry registers in Ash’s eyes as it's apparent I’m struggling, despite my efforts, but he heads off Mr. Jacobsen as he comes out behind me, and I can only be slightly grateful for it since I’d barely managed to avoid the counseling he’d tried to foist off on me. I’ve gone through a couple months of it and taken the meds, and I’ve managed to wean myself off the daily ones without too much of an issue. Now I only have them on hand for occasional panic attacks and sleeping pills for the bad nights when I need sleep. Those put me out further than the dreams can reach.
“Cordelia, you know Mr. Reid already?” Ash’s tactics are thwarted, but I’ve had a moment to catch my breath at least.
“We’re acquainted; we attended Mooreton together.” I leave it at that, and Mr. Jacobsen wishes me luck and tells me to come see him if I need anything at all before leaving me with Ash. “Well, lead the way, dorms first please, if you don’t mind.” Mr. Jacobsen had made me two keycards for my room and to use for incidentals on campus, and I am more than ready to unload my arms.
“Here, let me take those.” I hug my papers to me more tightly when Ashton tries to take them. Apparently, I'm not quite ready to let them go after all. “Suit yourself.” His tone is clipped, and I give him space as he leads me to the dormitory.
There’s one. With three wings and six floors, the building houses a thousand students give or take a few. That’s how elite Blackbriar is. I have a detailed map I'll be going over as soon as I'm settled to find my classes, and since the campus isn't huge it should be fairly easy to memorize it. I have the rest of today and tomorrow to acquaint myself with the grounds.
“You should drop all this and leave. It’s not worth it, you know?” Ash finally speaks up after we’re outside and halfway to the dormitory.
“How would you know what is and isn't worth it to me? Maybe if you all hadn’t fucked up my life, I wouldn’t have been forced into this. But we both know that’s your specialty where Damien is concerned, don’t we?” Ash pales at the venom and truth in my words. The night of the wreck isn’t the only time he’s been culpable regarding Damien.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about. Stopping Damien was like trying to stop a train that's gone off its tracks.” He swallows hard, and I’m sure there’s some truth to his words, but I really don’t care.
“What happened, Ash? You wanted to date that summer, remember? We went out on a few that ended with us at that cabin Drake and Damien’s parents own on the lake. It was supposed to be us and your friends and maybe a couple girls they brought too. How did that end with Jag and Damien crashing it and me losing my boyfriend and my virginity and gaining a stalker? Care to explain that one? ‘Cuz no one else has ever bothered.” We’re at the steps leading up to the dorm entrance now, and Ash is making a big to-do about using the keycard reader— meticulously lining it up and giving it his full attention, like he'd rather do anything than face me.
“I can’t talk about that night. You wouldn’t understand or believe me.” The last bit is so quiet that I barely catch it.
“You’re right. I don’t believe a thing you have to say. Just hurry up and get this tour over with. I can’t stand being near you.” His expression turns stony as he leads me into the elevator, remaining silent as we go up to the sixth floor where my room is located.
That’s not quite true. I still hold a special hurt and bruised up place for my first puppy love in my heart, but he doesn’t have to know that. Or that I still find his dark and dramatic features hot as hell. I get a pang of guilt at even the thought of admiring another man so soon after Kael.
“Here, let me see your keycard.” Ash holds out an expectant hand, and incredulity courses through me.
“Right, because I trust you to have it, period. Unless there’s some trick to using it, I think I can handle this part.” My snottiness is a small comfort when I realize I don’t really have a free hand, and I’m either going to have to set everything on the floor, let him take some like he’d originally offered, or let him fish the card out of my bag.
Ash’s cocked brow and pursed lips say it all. I’ve painted myself into a prideful corner.
“Shit, just get in my bag, please.” The shock that crosses his face when I give in without an argument goes a long way toward perking me back up. “What, you thought I couldn’t be reasonable?” It’s my turn to raise an eyebrow, and I hope it looks more badass than it feels.
He rummages through until he finds my wallet, pulling out one of the copies of my school ID that doubles as my room key. He has a funky expression on his face, and I’m wondering what he saw in there that I probably wouldn't have wanted him to.
“You’re still going by Shultz?” I’m not sure why my last name is an issue.
“Yes, it’s not as if I decided to get a divorce. Not sure what business it is of anyone else’s though.” And it’s really not. If someone has an issue, they can shove it.
“It may make things… uncomfortable. I think, no, never mind, I’m sure it’s fine, or it would have been in the contract.” It’s as if he’s talking to himself now.
Before I can question him about the contract and his knowledge of it since I had to sign an N.D.A, he swings the door open to my room. Excuse me, rooms, plural. A quick perusal shows a main living area, kitchenette, and several more doors I take to be the bedroom, bathroom, and maybe a closet, but I have no idea what would be behind the others. It’s awful big for one student.
“What the heck am I going to do with all this room? I have maybe three boxes and my suitcase in the car.” Ash side-eyes me, giving me a pitying glance. “What am I missing? I have roommates, don’t I? Of course I do, that’s how dorms work. Please tell me they’re not awful.” Ash’s eyes widen right before a voice speaks up.
“I’m sure I can be a pain, but I don’t know about awful. And Ash here doesn’t seem to have mistreated you so far.” The deep resonant voice of my older step-brother, Jaeger, has me spinning and losing half my papers I’d kept a deathgrip on up until now.
“What the fuck! Get out of my room. You’re not welcome here.” I start backing up in terror until I come up against a hard body where the open doorway should have been.
“Cora, calm down, you’re fine.” Strong, long-fingered hands grip my shoulder, and I twist around enough to find Drake standing in the open space. “We’re your roommates.”
The hell they are! I’m going straight back down to the counselor’s office to demand a reassignment.
“Nope. Not a chance in hell.” Pulling away from Drake, he eventually releases my shoulders, and I gather up my paperwork and fly out of the suite and into the elevator. Jaeger must not have thought I’d take off as he’s too slow, and I’m able to slap the close doors button before he follows me. The last thing I see is the panic in his expression as they shut and muffle his “Cora!”
I’m shaking and rehearsing my speech about my need to change rooms when the elevator arrives at the ground floor with a cheery ding. The doors slide open, and I make it two steps before it registers that Jaeger is blocking the entrance to the building. He must have slid down every banister on the way down to beat me here. He’s lucky he didn’t break his neck.
“Cora, wait. You can’t ask for a transfer.” I’m about to interrupt him when he drops a bombshell. “Compliance with all assignments, remember? It’ll break your contract.” His voice drops on the end as if he’s ashamed to be part of it, which he should be. It was his best friend and him telling said best friend that caused me to be here now.
“You can’t be serious. Since when are dorms that co-ed? I mean, yeah, there’s mixed housing, but actually sharing a suite, no.” Crossing my arms across my chest with my now raggedy papers, I wait for his answer.
“It was the only suitable room available on such short notice," he stiffly inform
s me. "The school was full up until we had an— opening.” At his reluctance to add the last bit, it dawns on me then that I’m taking Damien’s room. A shudder rolls through me, and I feel sick.
“You can’t make me stay in his room. That has to be a harassment clause or something. That’s wrong, and you know it.” I need my meds. I’ve made it six days without them, but I’m now at my breaking point. Meds and a nap. I’m going to have to go back up there.
“No, I switched. You’ll have my room. I sent all his belongings to his parents except the ones he wanted me to keep.” The grief he still harbors makes an appearance in his countenance, and I can almost have sympathy for him. Except, you know. They killed my baby and took Kael from me.
It’s an odd thing; Damien and Jaeger had been inseparable nearly from the moment they met. Had I not known for a fact they were into girls, I’d have thought they were an item. Case in point, bequeathing belongings after death.
“Fine, I need to lie down. I can’t take much more today.” That remorse pops up on his face again before he follows me back into the elevator.
“I shouldn’t have stopped you. You’d be better off away from here. You can go and try to change it if you’d like.” Whoa, have a one-eighty.
“If you think I’m giving up that easily, you’re delusional. I need to regroup and take a nap, then I’ll be just fine.” I flounce out of the elevator and don’t even have to use the keycard to get in the door as Ash is holding it open. Except I stall out inside, having no clue which room is mine. My head drops back in frustration, and a growl escapes, much to the amusement of Drake who is waving me into an open doorway. “Thanks,” I grudgingly offer before entering, immediately slamming the door shut behind me, and flipping the lock.
“That was rude, you know!” Drake's voice is only slightly muffled through the door, and I hope I don’t have to hear what they do in the privacy of their rooms. Taking in the room, I see a toilet through an open door, and I'm really glad to have my own bathroom. Sharing one would have been a catastrophe with five guys. Especially ones that I’d be perfectly fine with falling out of my life.
I don’t bother to respond and barely take note of the dresser, desk and chair, nightstand, and bookshelf before I go straight into the bathroom. Fishing tablets out of my purse, I swallow them with water out of the tap in my cupped hands and lay down. It’s not long before I’m out hardcore.
***
It's well after dark when I resurface. After shaking off the disorientation from waking in an unfamiliar place and washing my face, I quietly go out into the living room with my purse on my shoulder, determined to find the cafeteria and get my belongings from my car. At least I'm hoping the cafeteria will still be open, or at least a vending machine. However, stealth doesn’t matter when Jaeger is lying in wait for me.
“You’re still wearing his rings,” he says.
“What does it matter what I wear? And why is that your business?” I go to walk past him out the door when he snags my wrist.
“It is my business when what you do reflects on me, as the Headmaster reminded me while you took your nap. You’ll abide by the rules, or you’ll be kicked out, just like you were out of our parents’ house.” He’s stone cold serious, and I'm not sure if he realizes it, but his grip is getting tight enough to sting.
“Jaeger, I think you have a problem, and it’s not mine. Mom may kowtow to your dad, but the only man that I’d even consider obeying was yanked away from me on our wedding day. Don’t fucking try me, bro.” That manages to get under his skin. For whatever reason, he’s never liked the distinction.
“You know damn well I’m not your brother. We only met three years ago, so knock that shit off. Maybe it would be better if you left now since things are only going to get worse for you if you stay.” He abruptly releases my wrist— as if he's only just noticed he was holding it, and I pull it up to rub at the red mark his grip left. He’s never touched me in an ill manner before, even when his sidekick stalked my every move, and it's unsettling to say the least.
“Fine, you’re not my brother, but you can keep your hands to yourself all the same. And you can’t make me quit. I’ll get my grades, get my degree, and get the payout that’s the least Damien’s dickhead of a father could have allowed already.” I barely get the words out before Jaeger is advancing on me, menace in every step. My back hits the wall, and his palm settles over my racing heart, pinning me in place.
“Never, and I mean not ever, talk about Damien or his family in that manner again. Do you understand?” I nod, only wanting to escape.
I don’t understand what’s happened since I took a nap, but Jaeger has gone nuts. This is deja vu to the night I went to the lake house with Ash and his friends. It was like a switch had flipped in Damien, and now Jaeger is acting odder than usual. I edge away and slip out the door, heading for my car. I need a break already, and it’s only barely begun.
On my way down I plan how to make the situation palatable enough to get through it. Switching rooming assignments is a no go, but I can work with that. I’ll just have to learn their schedules and try to avoid them as much as possible. Which reminds me I haven't even seen the others yet. A sigh escapes me as I get in my car and start it up to move it to the student parking before hunting down the cafeteria.
They’re closing down for the night, but one of the workers takes pity on me and loads me up with an actually appetizing lasagna and a bag full of goodies she was going to have to throw out anyway. Making my way back to the dorm with my dinner, I take the opportunity to mark where some of the halls are by their names illuminated in the spotlights on the exterior. Most of my classes should be close together from what I could tell on the map, instead of across campus. This time around, I pass a few other students but avoid drawing attention to myself. Plenty of time later if I want to make friends.
The living room is empty, and based on the noises coming from the bedroom directly across from mine, I’d say someone has company. Ugh, boys. I nearly tiptoe to my room, trying to stay undetected, and manage to get into my room and close the door without encountering anyone. After stuffing my face with the surprisingly good cafeteria food, I stow the leftovers on the dresser, not interested in braving the living area, and half-assed brush my teeth with mouthwash from my purse and my finger.
Chapter Six
The straight-backed desk chair I’d shoved under the doorknob wakes me as the sliding feet make rubbing noises against the hardwood floor. I bolt upright and dash for the door, slamming it shut and twisting the lock again.
“Assholes! I knew you’d have a key. I want a deadbolt installed!” I yell through the closed door as I swipe at the tears that appear almost nightly on my cheeks. Based on the swearing coming from the other side, someone’s fingers had been in the way.
“Cora, it’s nearly noon. I suggest you get your things unpacked and get your supplies before classes start tomorrow,” a voice returns. I’m not sure which one of them it is, but it’s not any of the three from the night before. “And a deadbolt isn’t going to stop someone who can just get a key.” A thump on the door from a fist, I imagine, is left in parting.
Raking my hands through my messy hair, I plop down in the chair, having no clue how I’m going to make it through the day, let alone longer. I get up and go to the bathroom, relieving my bladder and doing what I can with my hair and teeth with what's on hand in my purse. The skin on my waist is itching and burning with patterned indents from wearing my jeans to bed, but I hadn’t been about to sleep without pants on.
As presentable as I can get, I make my way out into the common area, pulling up short when I find all of Drake's posse and Jaeger are in attendance, as well as a couple females who I’m assuming are other students. What a lovely surprise. Hoping to maybe make some friends, even if I'm feeling dishevelled, I smile at one of the girls. Only to have it fall as soon as she opens her mouth.
“This is the chick Damien was all hung up on? What was he thinking?” Pissed at myself
for even trying, I roll my eyes at the blonde and keep walking. Every place needs a snatch, and I’m thinking there’s more than one around here as well. I can’t wait to meet the normal people.
“Oh, I don’t know about that, sugar. Little sis over there was a sure thing for putting out.” I whip around at Jaeger’s remark, shooting him a look full of disgust. He knows that isn’t how things went down with Damien.
Determined not to cower, I snap back. “I wasn’t little sis last night, now was I, big bro?” A couple of the other guys jeer at him for that, and the girl on his lap wrinkles her nose, not at all happy.
“Turnabout is fair play, Cora. Better watch that sass around here. It’s liable to cause you some issues.” Jag pushes the girl off his lap onto the couch cushion next to him, a couch I’ll have to make sure I don’t sit on, before getting to his feet and heading toward me. “Need some help getting your things out of the car?”
I shake my head no while trying to find my voice. After last night, I don’t want him anywhere near me. “Back off, Jag,” I whisper when he’s within arm’s reach.
He halts at the nickname I gave him during those first few months when he and his dad moved in with me and Mom. Regret flits briefly across his face before he opens his mouth again. “Sorry, Cora. Headmaster says to make sure you settle in. That goes for all of us, and you’re not settled yet, are you?”
Ignoring him and not wanting his company, I spin on my heel and dart out the door, down to the elevator that stands open. My hand reaches in to slap the button for the bottom floor before I race to the stairwell and down to the floor below. I've just stepped out as I hear the door above slam followed by creative cursing that echoes through the hallway. Instead of sticking around, I cross the floor, not making eye contact with any of the residents meandering in the hall, until I reach the stairwell on the opposite side.
Gingerly, I open it and peek in to see if it’s clear. After the magical pop-up Jaeger did yesterday, I wouldn’t put it past them to have a secret shortcut down. Instead of going to my car, I stop at the school store to collect my books and supplies. The guy at the counter lights up when I give him my list of classes for textbooks.
