Fresh out of the shower with the scent of sex washed from my body, I plopped down on the bed me and King shared, debating whether I should go back downstairs. The living room television was still blasting ESPN, so I figured Johnie was still sipping a brew on the couch. Part of me wanted seconds with his comrade because the dick was just that damn good. But part of me felt I’d taken it a little too far, especially in our house on the living room floor on our wedding day.
How can you honestly blame yourself when he started the confusion? He’s the one who left that nigga to mend my broken heart while he chased for the next chick. Why am I tripping? Why am I going back and forth? I couldn’t stop my mind from spinning. My heart ached while my pussy pounded. Digging my phone from my purse and powering it back on, I patiently waited for all the notifications to load up so I could call Jamila to have girl talk.
Jamila
Sipping on a glass of wine, with Johnie’s soulful mixes playing through my home stereo speakers, I was cleaning my house in high heels, preparing for the new man who’d be spending more time around here. No man liked a dirty house or a woman too trifling to cook and clean, so I made sure Johnie would have a good impression this way. With a roast simmering in the Crock-Pot, fresh Kool-Aid in the fridge, and the CD player loaded with all of his underground mixes to show I was his supporter, I was willing to walk any avenue to get him back into my panties. I’d already gotten broken off with a few minutes of his good stroke, but just that quick I was sprung and wanted more. Not wanting to say it but feeling it for sure, I was glad King and Samira beefed last night, pushing me and Johnie together.
Ring, ring, ring.
Hearing my phone ring, thinking it was Johnie, I ran across the room full speed not wanting him to think I wasn’t available. Seeing it wasn’t him but just Mira, I still eagerly answered the phone because I hadn’t talked to my girl since last night. And, boy, did I have some news to tell her! “Well, look who finally rose from the dead. Are you okay?” Deciding to see how my girl felt first, I knew she was dealing with a broken heart. Johnie had texted he’d gotten in touch with K.P. and they were at the hospital with Rayna. Since the messages and posts on Instagram stopped, I’d let the issue go, all the while waiting on my sister girl to reach out.
“Girl, no. I saw all of your messages, so my bad on that. My phone was on silent then King knocked it out of my hand, powering it completely off. It’s a long story.”
“I’m sure it is, but we can kick it, boo. I ain’t got nothing but time if you need to talk. You already know I’m here for you.” Sitting down on the edge of my bed, I pulled a bag of weed from my nightstand drawer then prepared to roll up. The cleaning was done, and Samira needed my attention, so I was about to blaze to chill, advise my bestie, and wait on my new boo.
“I appreciate you being here for me, Mila, I swear. But it ain’t much to tell on me and King. Me and him drove to Toledo and eloped this morning after Rayna showed up on a nut.” Samira was talking calmly, too calmly for the information she was dropping.
“Married? Wow, congratulations!” I screamed into the phone, sounding much happier than the bride herself. “Should I calm down? You don’t sound so enthused. And what the fuck you mean Rayna showed up? Why didn’t you call me sooner?”
“Again, it’s a long story, but on the marriage tip, why? I mean, why should I be? You already know the second part of this equation. We’re supposed to be checked into the Motor City Casino hotel as we speak. But naw, he’s busy playing birthing partner to a girl I just found out about a few hours ago.”
“Yeah, I could see how that would piss you off. I’d be feeling some type of way on that too.” Having to let my girl wallow in pity before trying to pick her up, I had to admit I’d be far past hurt too.
“How am I supposed to accept his son? Am I immoral for wishing something to be wrong and that baby doesn’t make it?” I knew Samira was hurt, but the words coming out of her mouth were mean and beyond cutthroat.
“Damn, Mira, that’s a little harsh I think. Remind me not to get on your bad side,” I joked but was keeping it real. I’d always known Samira to take her relationship with K.P. seriously, but to wish death on an infant was some graveyard love I’d never experienced. “I think with time you’ll learn to accept his son, but in the meantime, you might want to keep your feelings to yourself. You know what King said about your slick tongue toward his kid,” I reminded her, trying to be a good friend.
“I can’t call it. Maybe you’re right on that, or maybe you’re way wrong. All I know is that she won’t have to worry about me trying to play stepmomma. I don’t want anything to do with his affair-affiliated kid.”
“I think you’re going to have to eventually have a relationship with his child, Mira. Come on now. Especially as his wife.” I tried keeping it real with her, but I didn’t know if she was in the mood to hear what I had to say.
“Let me tell you how everything played out first.” As she proceeded to tell me about the oohs and aahs of their argument ending in him storming out and leaving Johnie there to console her. I wanted to hit pause in the conversation because that nigga J was supposed to be with King. Before I could pause her to be quiet, the last three words spat from Samira’s mouth had me choking and coughing on the blunt harder than necessary. “Then we fucked.”
“You and Johnie, King’s artist, who took me to my car last night, just fucked?” Trying to make sure I’d heard her clearly, my attitude level was set to gear straight into go-hard if I’d heard correctly.
“Girl, yes! That’s why I’m calling you. That nigga put it down and had my pussy squirting within thirty seconds. Am I wrong? Don’t you think King deserves this for having a baby on me?” Every single word out of her mouth was being ignored as I pulled harder on the blunt, pacing the room, ready to explode. This bitch right here gotta have ’em all!
“Where is Johnie now?” Bypassing all of her questions, I knew the most important was the whereabouts of my dude. How could he fuck me a few hours ago then run up in her just like that? Naw, I wasn’t about to be the one gettin’ played around here!
“Downstairs watching ESPN. He’s on babysitting duty until King gets back. So should I give him some more of this pussy or what?”
Hanging up on her without responding, I had to process what I’d just heard. Everything was beyond fucked up. Here I was feeling Johnie, thinking I was about to be having me one in the music game too, but Samira had to spread ’em wide for him not knowing that would leave me still out here single, lonely, and bitter. When I called Johnie’s phone and was instantly greeted with the voicemail after two rings, my worries about just being a jump off were confirmed. “I need another blunt and maybe a drink to get me lifted off this bag of rocks my girl just hit me upside the head with.”
Making it to the kitchen and pulling out the bottle of Cîroc I’d gotten for me and Johnie to turn up with later, I cracked it open, turning up by my lonesome, knowing that his ass was now off-limits to screw. Damn, Mila, what now? Samira had given up calling me back, since each time I shot her quicker to voicemail. When I read her texts asking what happened so suddenly, I lied saying the ex was over so I’d get back to her later. No sweat off her back, I was sure. She was probably getting comforted by Johnie again, to my dismay.
I was drowning my sorrows. The more liquor I drank, the more revenge I wanted to get. No one owed me anything, but with the games everyone was playing, I felt it was only right I got my fair share of playing time in too. Calling Johnie’s phone then Samira’s, both with no answer, I called the third number in my log, which was King’s. He answered after the second ring.
Chapter Eight
King
“What up, Mila? I ain’t in the mood for getting grilled over taking care of my responsibilities. So if Samira put you up to calling me, then you can hang up now.” Standing in front of a hospital security guard who was making sure my temper stayed under control while Rayna underwent her C-section, I had nothing but time on my hands, bu
t not for any additional drama.
“Slow down, King. I’m not calling you about your situation with Rayna at all. Is everything straight by the way?”
“Actually everything is fucked up, but that’s a long story we can kick it on later. But what’s up?” Seeing one of the two white security guards eyeing me for using profanity, I tried to straighten up, not wanting to be thrown out of this hospital altogether.
“Can you come by here right after you leave the hospital before going home? It’s something extremely important I have to talk to you about.” Jamila sounded frantic. Never before had she called me directly needing me for anything. Part of me felt like the whole thing was a setup, but I wasn’t in the position to grill her like I needed to.
“Is everything good? Do you need me to send Johnie?” Double-checking to make sure she wasn’t in immediate danger, I didn’t want something else on my shoulders for Samira to fuss at if this was serious.
“Fuck Johnie if you don’t mind me saying, with his weak-song-singing ass!”
“My manz must’ve dug you the wrong way,” I laughed, getting more side looks from the same security officer. Cracker Jack Sam was gonna make me go ham on him next.
“Yeah, actually he has. And during the process, I found out he was plotting to do you wrong too. The information I have can’t be shared over the phone, but I see you’re trying to take me as a joke.” Hearing the seriousness in Jamila’s voice, I knew whatever piece of information she was withholding had to be weighing in heavy.
“No doubt. I’ll be there once everything is okay here,” I promised her, meaning every word.
“Okay, call me when you’re on your way. Don’t tell Samira or Johnie that you talked to me.” She hung up the phone leaving me wondering why I couldn’t communicate with my wife either. Jamila knew that I’d agree because the cloud of me wanting to know what scheme Johnie was plotting on me was brewing over my head. I’d been done shady a few times in this music business over cats stealing my beats or songs, but something told me this might’ve been more severe.
When the doors of the room we were waiting in opened, my heart froze for a moment. Seeing the itty-bitty Asian man still shaking from my attack, I wanted to apologize, but he had it coming for not respecting me as a man. Once it was whispered then finally announced to me that Rayna and the baby were doing fine in recovery, I counted my blessings and thanked God for giving me a chance to be a father.
“Congratulations, you lucky bastard.” Tiana came in handing me a cigar. “I would talk some shit to you about getting married, but since this ain’t the day to ruin Rayna’s spirits, we can both hold off.”
That was a temporary truce I could accept hastily. Tiana was relentless at getting what she wanted. “I’m down with that. I’d love to step out of these big, bad wolf shoes for a few hours.”
“I can’t call what demons you’re fighting, but let’s get escorted to see your son.”
Chapter Nine
King
I’d always hated hospitals and today was no different. No matter how much disinfectant and antiseptic spray was used, the overpowering smell of germs and sickness kept my stomach twisted in knots. I would’ve much rather preferred to be stroking my newlywed wife in a five-star suite instead of welcoming into the world a bouncing baby boy by my side chick. But the consequences of me being a nut in the streets for groupie love had me in a tough spot with no way out.
Ring! Ring! Ring!
Samira was relentless when it came to getting in touch with me. Looking down at her smiling picture as it flashed across the screen, I felt horrible for taking her happiness away. In all of her extraordinary efforts to support my dream, I’d given her a nightmare in return.
“Hello,” I calmly answered, hoping she’d return the same demeanor. The last exchange of words we had was of her yelling, crying, and trying to run up on me.
“Wow, I’m shocked you even picked up,” she replied in a low tone. “Are you still with your other family?” The disdain in her voice was heard loud and clear.
“Come on now, Mira, let’s not take it there.” Hanging my head low while rubbing my forehead, I felt a headache coming on from hearing another round of her sarcastic comments and smart remarks.
“Why not? You took it there,” she huffed, refusing to back down. “I don’t know how you want me to react with you out here making babies and leaving your homeboy to nurse my wounds. Do you think that was the ‘real man’ type of move to make, King?”
The thin ice she was skating on was officially broken since she’d questioned my manhood. “Wife or not, Samira, you better watch your mouth. If I weren’t a man, I wouldn’t be out here busting nuts and making babies. Now quit fuckin’ gunning to get your feelings hurt,” I blasted her.
“Wow! It’s like that? Well, husband or not, you better quit disrespecting me and running the streets like your messy ass can’t be replaced. I’m not ugly, I’ve got my own cash, and just like I made you, I can make another!” Shouting into the phone, she was trying to play tough because her feelings were hurt. Then a second later, as I expected, she was crying through the phone. “Why don’t you just come home and make this right? For years I’ve been your family. Why were you in a rush to change that?”
Unfortunately for Samira, I was more moved by her ranting words than her emotion-driven tears. Therefore, I swayed from being sentimental and let her have it. “Well you’ve made it quite obvious that you can hold your own, Samira, so do you. Don’t let another one of my problems hold you back. My other family needs me. Once I see about my son, I’ll see you when I get home if you’re still there.” Before she could respond, I hung up and refused to answer the following ten calls. A nigga might’ve been wrong, but she needed to put her attitude on freeze and play her position like the married woman she’d tricked me into making her.
As badly as I wanted to answer and confide in the one woman who’d made all my problems go away thus far, I knew for the first time in our relationship that Samira wasn’t about to have my back. Who could blame her though? Out of the two women I’d been dividing my time with, she’d truly been the one gettin’ played.
Taking a swig from a stale Pepsi I’d purchased from the vending machine, I hung my head into my lap and rocked back and forth anxiously. As a man, I was supposed to have better control over my emotions, but everything surrounding my love life was in limbo. And to make matters worse, I was missing the birth of my firstborn.
“Ay, me and you need to kick it one-on-one before going up in this room.” Tiana grabbed my arm, pulling me to the side.
So caught up in my thoughts, I hadn’t seen her come from the back. “What up, T? I thought we were straight.” I shook my head, confused by her ripped expression. Today clearly wasn’t my day with women.
“For the sake of what I’m about to tell you, K.P., I actually hope we stay on the up-and-up.” She looked me deep in the eyes, letting me know she was on the serious tip. I put all of my judgments about her to the side so I could hear her all the way out.
“Damn, when you put it like that, what other choice do I have? Give it to me. What’s up?”
She took a deep breath then began talking. “Rayna told me about you going haywire at ya crib then choking her up. I flew her here like a bat out of hell after she got home in pain trying to front like wasn’t nothing wrong. They admitted her right away, and the rest is history.”
“Real talk, it’s not my bad on how things went down at my crib. Ray knows good and damn well it’s a no-fly zone for her where me and Samira rest our heads. She brought that part of the drama on herself.”
“Wow, K.P., you are more self-absorbed than I thought.” She momentarily looked away disgusted. “Rayna might’ve been foolish enough to fall for ya sorry, singing ass, but y’all baby shouldn’t suffer for his parents’ stupidity.”
This was why me and Tiana stayed at odds. She always found her place in my and Rayna’s business. “You’ve got the game wrong if you think I’m about to stand
around being berated by you. If I wanted to get burnt during a bitch session, I would’ve answered Samira’s calls. I’m more concerned about my son, Tiana. Do you think you can update me about him?”
She snickered then twisted her lips while looking around like she couldn’t believe I was addressing her so raw. No matter what she thought, I was tired of holding my hand for chicks who wanted to walk and talk like they had a dick like me.
“You’re right.” She took a cop then placed her hand on her hip. “The baby is really my main concern.” She shook her head. I could tell she was trying to hold back the tongue-lashing she thought I deserved. “While you was marrying that cash-cow bitch of yours, the mother of your child was losing blood, cramping, and putting off delivering li’l man ’cause she wanted you here. The doctor you yoked up pushed for an emergency Cesarean long before you showed up because your son’s umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck, causing his oxygen to be cut off. And you already know he’s premature.”
Tiana continued to go on about how Rayna lost a vast amount of blood, my son’s current health condition, and how his future well-being could be jeopardized because of me manhandling Rayna. I felt my legs get limp as the responsibility and burden of bringing pain to my seed fell heavy onto my shoulders. “How’s Rayna? Please tell me she’s okay.” I avoided direct eye contact.
“You already know how Rayna is. At this point, she’s trying to be strong by putting up fronts like you haven’t hurt her. I’m just asking that you support her and take whatever blows you’ve got coming like a man. Don’t make shit worse by arguing back. The hospital is already doing a favor on her behalf by letting you remain on the premises.”
It was obvious Tiana wasn’t going to let me through the door leading to the back without agreeing to her terms. Whatever problems we had in the past were irrelevant at this point because she was telling me some real shit that deserved respect. I was regretful for not getting here sooner and definitely for spazzing out on Rayna when she showed up on my doorstep looking for my love. Everything was on me, and it was all the way fucked up.
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