by Hayleigh Sol
So maybe I shouldn’t feel bad about being horny–hungry. We were all slaves to our bodies’ needs anyway. Hopefully, I had better self–control than a couple of forest critters. Luka and I would just be two fellow campers turned friends.
Well, friends turned virginity–swappers turned back to friends.
So we had some history. That was no reason to make things weird.
An evil genius smile stole over my face as I realized the perfect way to approach and make nice with Luka, which also happened to be a good suggestion for a friendly activity. Feeling too pleased with myself by half, I rode my bike over to his campsite, fully intending to copycat my way through an apology like ten–year–old Luka had given me. We’d both get a chuckle from the memory, he’d think I was cute—like a friend thought another friend was cute—all would be forgiven, and we could go back to hanging out as buddies.
There was just one problem with my plan. One I hadn’t even factored in as a possibility. Luka had told me he was a morning person so I figured it wasn’t too early for him to be moving around, making breakfast or whatever he did to start his day. When I pedaled around the curve in the road, I saw that his boat and SUV were gone. For a second, my heart flipped. Had he left for good?
It couldn’t be; his reservations were through the Fourth of July, just like mine. I didn’t believe he’d been so bothered by last night that he’d left early to avoid seeing me. I wasn’t nearly egotistical enough to think I had that kind of effect on him. On anyone, really.
As my knee–jerk panic receded, I spotted his tent and rustic kitchen setup, his clothesline and stack of firewood, all still in place. Briefly, I was bummed to think of him out on the boat for the day without me. With a metaphorical slap to my own face, I decided this was for the best. I’d spend my morning as I should anyway – working.
Once I’d touched base with Brad, I would send an apology text to Luka and mention a bike ride later or even another day. If he had some excuse or flat–out turned me down, I’d wish him a lovely rest of his vacation and life. Good riddance to silly, pointless flirtations with a boy from my past.
I thought perhaps I should run the plan by my support crew first. My feelings about the Luka situation vacillated somewhere between a young girl with her first crush and the thirty–two–year–old, relationship–tested (and somewhat jaded) woman I was. I needed perspective and advice.
Plus, I couldn’t wait to tell them all about the past couple of days with him. Or his chiseled abs, a feature we’d all unanimously agreed years before was the sexiest part of a sexy guy.
So I hauled my cookies on over to one of the spots I knew had reliable wi–fi.
Oo, cookies. I wondered if I could find some Oreos—the only mass–produced cookie I’d found that was dairy–free—at the tiny store.
I parked my bike in the same spot as the first day I’d been here but, instead of going inside, I wandered in the direction of the docks down the hill from The Forks. Actually, it was just one long dock here, compared to the multi–pronged, several hundred–slip marina at The Pines I had walked last night with Luka. I preferred the quieter, less commercial vibe at this end of the lake. Pacing, stomping my feet, and waving an arm around haphazardly to fend off any opportunistic mosquitoes, I called Brad.
No answer again. I sent a text that I was free and had cell service if he wanted to talk, then hiked back to the store for my motivational cookies. Settling in at one of the outdoor tables with my snack and laptop, I couldn’t seem to focus on the research I’d hoped to resume from the other day. The afternoon Luka had teased me about working on vacation. Since I was thinking of him anyway, I pulled out my phone to text my apology, then remembered I had another message to send first.
Me: Hey, ladies. How’re they hangin’?
Simone: Well, look at this. She’s alive after all.
Emma: Not much hanging when you’re barely a B–cup, but such is the way for the Asian athlete. Most of us, anyway.
Bailey: Yeah, but you’re an adorably skinny bitch, so I don’t wanna hear any complaints about your chest size. Love ya!
Emma: How’s your vacation, Maya? Bailey, I love you sometimes…and only a little.
Me: Everyone remember my deflowering story?
Holly: The guy you met up there at the lake, the hot and heavy 2–week fling that ended at exactly the right time before anyone got attached?
Simone: Wasn’t he the same guy you made friends with when you were little and he just happened to be there again when you were older?
Me: The very same.
Lisette: Don’t tell us you bumped into him again and picked up where you left off as horny teenagers. I will call you a liar to your face. Wait, let’s do a video chat so I can call you a liar to your face.
Me: Thanks for the spoiler, babe.
We all logged into a chat app and Emma was the first to explode. “No freakin’ way! He’s there??? What was his name again?”
“Luka. Lukasz. And yep, he walked right up to me the first day I was here.”
“That’s right, you like the foreign dudes like me.” Holly raised her eyebrows and winked in an exaggerated manner. “Well, scheisse, girl. What’s he look like?”
“He recognized and remembered you? That’s so sweet. And…hot. Wait, Holly’s question – is he still hot?” Simone was a not–so–closeted romantic—her addiction was fed by the many romance novels she read as a break from the literary classics she taught—but that didn’t keep her from wanting to know the superficial details. I loved that about her.
“Even hotter than at seventeen.”
Lisette scowled. “Oh, you evil braggart. I bet the sex is even hotter than before, too. God, I gotta get some action.”
“We haven’t even kissed. But, yes, you do need to get some or you’re going to re–virginize.”
“Ha! You’re one to talk. And that’s not a thing.”
“Sometimes it feels like it, though.” Simone thought she was mumbling under her breath, but we all caught what she’d said.
Holly wasn’t about to let a friend’s dry spell go unnoticed. “Mony, I thought you were dating the handsome adjunct professor?”
“He got a tenure–track position at another university. In Florida.”
Sympathetic noises were made all around. Emma asked Simone if there were any other prospects among her fellow professors, followed by Lisette encouraging her sister to look further afield.
Bailey cleared her throat pointedly. “We’ll work out how to get Simone and Lisette laid next time, please. I want more details about this Luka dude.”
A chorus of agreement had me filling them in on everything that had happened, not skipping the totally spine–tingling way he told me he’d thought about me over the years or the way last night had, unfortunately, ended.
“So what if your ex called. If this new guy doesn’t recognize that your career is a priority and you may have to take a call or text at an inconvenient time, that’s on him.” Lisette could always be counted on to advocate for work as a priority.
“Hey, hey, I thought we just wanted Maya to have a vacation fling. She doesn’t need to be worried about this guy’s feelings.”
Emma shook her head at Bailey’s predictable stance. “Even if it’s just a fling, there’s always room for politeness. Sorry, babe, but I think you do owe him an apology. He was about to kiss you and your ex interrupted. A second time.”
“But just to talk business. Brad and I aren’t together, he’s just—”
“Does Luka really know that, though?” Holly interrupted. “You have to admit your current it’s complicated status with Brad would be off–putting for most guys.” It was. I knew that, had even acknowledged the fact to Luka last night. “Look, I agree with Bay that you should bang it out with the old flame but Em’s ri
ght that you can be classy in the way you handle an affair.”
With the exception of Bailey, everyone agreed I needed to make amends, especially if I wanted a chance to “drive his boat”. Emma wiggled her brows in an imitation of Holly’s earlier move, making it comically obvious she wasn’t talking about me taking his actual boat for a spin around the lake.
“Are we sure Maya should get naked with this guy? I’m all for a palate cleanse after Brad, but the guy you lost your virginity to? Seems a bit risky, Maya. You already have little stars in your eyes when you talk about him.” Bailey was staring me down the best she was able to manage through a screen.
“I don’t have stars in my eyes.” A couple of the other ladies chimed in, backing Bailey up, the little punks. “Fine, I like him. He’s really sweet and funny and his smile just…it’s like a beacon for my lady parts.”
Simone and Emma laughed.
Bailey rolled her eyes. “So go sit on his smile. Just make sure your lady parts don’t convince your girly heart that this is more than a vacation fling.”
While it was true that I was still attracted to Luka—and wanted to sit on his smile—Bailey’s warning got the hamster wheel in my brain spinning. I’d never been the dewy–eyed, schmaltzy type who thought of Luka as my first love. He’d been a friend first, then a sexy and sweet means to an end when I was more than ready to ditch my innocence. I’d known our time together was finite and was totally cool with that, preferred it even. But to deny that I felt a strong pull toward him—always had, as evidenced by my many libidinous daydreams since I’d seen him again—would be a lie.
Bay was right. That kind of magnetism was dangerous when I was just getting out of a relationship, trying to save and successfully manage my business, and we lived seven hours apart. Oh, and I was already headed down the path of assuming he was interested in anything more than a side of hookup with his vacation.
Even if he were, long distance relationships rarely stood the test of time and one absolutely would not survive someone like me, who worked evenings and weekends and usually fell asleep when I was too exhausted to hold my tablet up anymore.
Actually, I didn’t know for sure that he was still in the Napa area. Huh, funny that hadn’t come up in all our conversations. But that wasn’t important. What I needed to do was apologize for last night’s weirdness and shift us onto more friendly ground. Once I got that out of the way, I’d be able to focus on the research and planning I was supposed to be doing instead of obsessing over the past forty–eight hours like a Lukasz fangirl.
Me: Came by your site this morning to say sorry for last night. Had fun hanging out yesterday and wondered if you’d be up for a bike ride? Promise I’ll keep my phone off.
There. “Fun” and “hanging out” were friend words, right? And there wasn’t much chance of hand holding or smoldering gazes if we were cycling around the lake. Plus, the allure of his grin would have to be diluted by his bike helmet.
Uggh, was I really going to wear my own dorky helmet in front of him?
Yep, I definitely was. Because we were just friends. And friends didn’t try to look cute or hot for each other.
Someone from the diner who wasn’t Jill came by and offered a menu, assuring me it was fine to stay and use the table and wi–fi whether or not I ordered anything. Neither Brad nor Luka had gotten back to me, so I cracked open my laptop, plugged in earbuds, and queued up a playlist.
Hours must’ve passed because my hollow stomach was emitting growls loud enough to be heard over the music in my ears. Fueled by songs from a time I felt like I could do or be anything—The Killers, Salt–N–Pepa, Daft Punk—I let the driving beats take me back to that time of youthful optimism. I was surprised by how much I accomplished. There was an outline and projected timeline for expanding the business into the eco–design sphere. Initially, I would simply add that branch to our website and wait to spend money on marketing until our cash flow had improved.
Those projections had sent me down the rabbit hole of the company’s finances for the last quarter, then the past year, then the past five years. I’d been letting Brad take the lead on all of that, but now I had the time to look more closely.
As I’d long suspected, Evan and I were bringing in the lion’s share of revenue, consistently. What I hadn’t expected was the discovery that, though Tiffany’s work added to the pool, she was barely earning the company enough to justify her salary. Meg’s numbers were all over the place, probably because she was always calling in sick, for herself or one of her three kids. I’d long suspected her job with me was only needed as supplemental income to her husband’s to cover childcare. Cory’s stats had been promising in the beginning, even better than Evan’s a couple of months, but had plateaued at a level that was also just above the cost of employing him.
I ran some scenarios and, if my underperforming employees brought in even twenty percent more revenue, Green for Green would be able to afford marketing for the new projects I wanted to pursue for the next twelve to eighteen months. How could I motivate them, though? I’d tried everything the management books and articles suggested. Maybe Brad would have better luck. Not that I could talk to him about it when he still wasn’t calling, texting, or emailing me. And I had service for once!
“Hey, Maya. You doing alright out here?” I was surprised Jill had remembered my name from Luka’s introduction the other day.
“Hi, Jill. I was just thinking of coming inside for lunch, actually. Am I too early?”
She shook her head, held the door open for me, and got me settled at a table just as my phone dinged with a text alert. “So, where’s that sweet talker, Luka? Your little reunion the other day was awfully meet–cute; I told my daughter all about it.”
“Oh, uh…”
Jill laughed and moved away before I could fumble my way through a response. “Yeah, he tends to have that effect, doesn’t he?”
You have no idea, Jill. I picked up my phone as she dropped off a menu and glass of water, telling me to let her know when I was ready to order.
Luka: Hey, sorry I missed you this morning. Had to take the boat out; the lake’s like glass if you get out there early enough.
Luka: A bike ride sounds good. I’m back at camp but you and your bike don’t seem to be. Am I too late?
Me: Just having a late lunch at The Forks. I’ll ride over and we can go to Wishon Point, if that sounds good?
Luka: Sounds great. See you soon.
Should I have invited him for lunch? Maybe not. I’d hate to have another meal with Luka interrupted by Brad if he got back to me. I’d hoped we could catch up, talk over my ideas for Green for Green’s new direction, but I wasn’t going to wait around here all afternoon.
Since we’d put our relationship on hold—I really had to figure out if I should be considering us officially broken up—Brad had been pretty lax about replying to texts and emails. He’d been good about it when he was my boyfriend and it was more than a little annoying that he made me wait, sometimes several days, now. It felt like I was cast in the role of clingy ex–girlfriend, even though I only contacted him about the business.
By the time I finished lunch, my phone was still silent. Except for the checking–in voicemail I had from Mom.
“I know you’re too busy to talk to your mother, but I need to hear your voice from time to time, Maya. How do I know someone hasn’t taken your phone and is texting that you’re fine when you’re not?” It was a conversation we’d had too many times to count.
I also knew that calling her now would mean a barrage of questions about the lake: how was the water level, how many Ponderosa pines had died, could I see the effects of the last forest fire, how was the campsite, and had I been by Grandpa Sawyer’s fire rings yet. Since I was meeting Luka to smooth things over, I didn’t want to keep him waiting. I’d try to call Mom tomorrow.
The ten–minute ride
back to the campground was long enough for nervous butterflies to invade my stomach. I told myself I was just anxious about making my apology and not about seeing him after we’d come so close to locking lips last night.
Not thinking about that, Maya. From here on out, you’re friends.
As I pedaled closer to Luka’s campsite, I yanked off my helmet and finger–tousled my hair.
Yeah, so I didn’t want him to see my helmet–hair. A lady was allowed some vanity, wasn’t she?
I spotted him sitting in a camp chair as soon as I braked at his backed–in SUV. It looked like he was reading a paperback.
A man who reads? My mate–seeking hormones perked up.
Down, girls.
“Hi, can Luka come out and play?”
The line I’d borrowed from our childhood had the desired effect; he laughed and walked my way. “Hey, Maya. Nice wheels. You gonna put that helmet back on for the main road?”
Busted.
He grinned like the cheeky bastard he was before retrieving his own bike and helmet. The distance to Wishon was shorter than I’d remembered, but so had been the trip between the campground and The Forks. I guess everything seems bigger when you’re a kid.
We agreed to keep going until Luka waved and gestured at a lone picnic table on a small beach. It was hidden from the road by trees and, once we’d found our way down to it, I saw how isolated it was. I was suddenly nervous again.
“Gee, if you wanted to kill someone, this’d be the perfect place to do it.”
He half–smiled, half–frowned in confusion at me.
“Sorry, don’t know why I said that. It’s a nice spot I didn’t even know was here. Quiet.”
It would be if you’d shut up, Maya.
“So, I wanted to apologize for last night, too.”
Oh.
“It wasn’t great that your ex interrupted our evening, but I understand that he’s overseeing things in your absence and he might’ve needed to talk to you about something important.”
