by Kaylee Ryan
She gives me a satisfied grin. “There you go. You don’t work for him, you’re not breaking any rules. Take it day by day and see what happens.”
“Eat your pizza,” I tell her, ending the conversation. Although I hate to admit it, she has a point. I’ve been guarded in life, and I do keep people out. Maybe she’s right. Maybe I can just throw caution to the wind and see what happens. I can live through a broken heart, hell, that was my life growing up. Having Blaine break my heart would be minor compared to my father not loving me, and telling me that on a daily basis, and losing my Uncle Bobby, the one person in life who was on my team.
We spend the next hour catching up. They’re going to start trying for a baby and my heart swells for her. I want that for them. After she leaves, I take the nap I had been contemplating earlier. I’m emotionally exhausted from our conversation. I lie here for what feels like hours before falling asleep, but as I drift off, I’ve decided. I’m not going to fight it. I’m just going to go with it, and see where it takes me. If anything, at least my battery-operated boyfriend will get a break. It’s been too long for me, and the idea that Blaine could be the one to break my dry streak has me drifting off with a smile on my face.
It’s been three weeks since my talk with Maria. Three weeks of watching him, and to be honest, wanting him. That first week we went to a track in Kentucky, two and a half hours from home, so the travel time was cut short, which I was thankful for. Ashley also stayed home, so I spent most of my time with Robin and Brian in the T-shirt trailer. When Blaine won, we all met him for pictures on the front stretch, but I made sure to keep a body in between us. It’s safer that way.
The next week, we were at a track here in Tennessee; it was only a twenty-minute drive, so we didn’t leave until Friday morning. I’ve learned that Blaine likes to be one of the first to arrive. He claims it’s to get a good pit spot, but Robin tells me that he’s always been that way when it comes to racing. He truly loves the sport and wants to be relaxed when it’s time to hit the track. You can’t do that if you’re late getting there from traffic or any other reason that might cause a delay. Again, we had limited interactions. A few looks across the fire, a brush of his arm against mine as we were moving in the hauler, but nothing more. Nothing like the kiss that first weekend. I’m both disappointed and relieved. So basically, I’m a mess over him, over the possibility of us.
Every time I talk to Maria, she asks how things are going, and I’m honest when I say I have nothing to report. She went as far as calling last night and telling me to make my move this trip. This weekend we’re going to Pennsylvania. The track is nine hours away. That doesn’t include stopping for gas and food or traffic. It’s going to be a long one.
That brings me to now, bright and early Wednesday morning, five in the morning to be exact. I park my Impala in the same spot, and grab my bags out of the trunk. One for me, and one for work, that I’ve only needed once. That’s a good thing of course, but it would give me something else to focus on.
“You got what you need?” he asks from behind me. I would recognize his voice anywhere. Blaine Bishop is in no way forgettable.
“Yeah, just my usual,” I say, holding a bag up in each hand.
“I’ll take them.” He reaches for the bags.
“I can get it.”
“My momma raised me better than that. Hand ’em over, Bree.” He reaches for them again, and I let him take them. There is no use in arguing anyway, he’ll win, and besides, if he insists on the heavy lifting, he can have it.
“This is a long one,” I say, trying to make small talk that’s safe.
“Yeah, nine hours straight through. We will have to stop a couple of times for fuel and food. Dad and I are tossing around driving halfway today and the other half tomorrow. The race isn’t until Saturday night, so we have plenty of time.”
“I’m just along for the ride,” I say like an idiot.
He mumbles something about you and ride, and I ignore it. I can feel the blush coating my cheeks. Instead of sticking around so he can see, I open the door to the toter home and find, Rick, Kevin, and Jacob already there. Kevin is behind the wheel, while Rick is occupying the passenger seat. “Am I late?” I ask, worried I’ve put us behind schedule.
“Nah, we’re just all early. We are still waiting for Robin and Brian to get here,” Kevin explains. Just as the words leave his mouth, headlights pull in. I watch as Brian backs up to the T-shirt trailer. He gets out and says a few words to Blaine, before climbing back in his truck and pulling out of the drive, trailer in tow.
“Ready?” Blaine asks, climbing on board.
“I’m going back to sleep.” Jacob stands and moves to his bunk, climbs in, and pulls the curtain.
“He can sleep in any situation.” Rick laughs.
“Let’s get this train moving,” Kevin says, putting the vehicle in drive and following Brian.
I’m sitting at the table, and to my surprise, Blaine slides in across from me. “What are you looking at?” he asks, pointing to my laptop.
“I thought I’d try to find a movie to watch.”
He raises his eyebrows and I point to the mobile hot spot that I purchased after our first weekend. “Ah, you know we have one here.” He points to a small square box mounted to the wall.
“No, I mean, I know you do in the T-shirt trailer for credit card transactions, but I didn’t know there was one here too.”
“Yeah, password is Checkmate.” He chuckles. “You can thank Ashley for that one. She set it up. You should use ours, save your data.”
“I bought the unlimited plan.” I shrug.
“What are you watching?”
“Not sure yet. Any ideas?”
“Don’t really watch much TV.”
“I’m more of a reader,” I confess.
“Yeah? What do you read?”
Again, I blush. I’m not embarrassed but confessing my love for my books to Blaine, is… a little intimidating. “Romance,” I finally say.
He nods. “I can see that about you.”
“What does that mean? You can see that about me?”
“Chill, Bree, it’s not a bad thing. You’re not like anyone I’ve ever met. The women I meet throw themselves at me for my name, my status. None of that even seems to register with you.”
“Not really. I mean, you’re just a man. A man who has made a successful career out of doing what he loves. I might not have the status, but I’ve done the same.”
He nods. “So, what are we watching?”
I have to bite my lip to hide my smile as I click through the options, knowing I need to choose something that will hold both of our attention. Finally I click on the first The Fast and the Furious movie. “You coming over here?” I ask, unsure.
“Why don’t we move to the couch?”
I nod. Sliding out of the booth, laptop in hand, I move to the couch. Reaching up, he grabs a couple of pillows and a blanket out of the overhead storage and settles in beside me. He motions for me to lift the laptop so he can throw the cover over me. “What are you doing?” I ask softly.
“You always seem to be cold when we’re on here. Thought you might want this,” he replies just as soft.
Looks like the sweetheart in him is out today. Not that I’m complaining. I hit Play and he chuckles. “I didn’t peg you for a F&F kind of girl.”
“Paul Walker,” I say, deadpan. He turns to look at me, a confused expression on his face. “Vin Diesel,” I add. “There’s not a woman alive who will turn down watching those two men in action,” I confess.
I expect him to give me a hard time, but he surprises me when he leans in, his lips next to my ear. “You got a thing for guys who drive fast cars, Bree?”
My immediate thought is to deny, deny, deny, but then I think about Maria and our conversation, and I make a decision to take a chance. “Just one guy really,” I say, turning to face him. He’s close, so close that if either of us leans in just a little, we’d be kissing.
&n
bsp; “Yeah?” His voice is gravelly.
“Uh-huh, now let’s watch the movie.” I turn to face the screen. I’ve put it out there. Now we just have to wait and see.
If someone would have told me that this season I would have a sexy redhead tagging along, I would have laughed at them. If they would have told me that that same sexy redhead would have me by the balls, I would have told them to get fucked. However, here I am sitting beside her, her head on my shoulder as she’s curled up under one of my blankets watching The Fast and the Furious. Jacob is still sleeping, and I’ve seen the glances that Kevin and Rick have been giving me, but I can’t find it in me to care.
It’s been a struggle these past few weeks to stay away from her, to limit my exposure to her, but today, this trip, I knew that wasn’t possible. I decided I would try and play it cool, be the nice guy. Forget that I remember the feel of her lips or the way her body felt pressed against mine. That lasted all of fifteen minutes. When she settled on the couch beside me, I knew that any plans I had for pretending were shot.
She’s addictive.
Now here we are, the last few minutes of the movie, and she’s sleeping peacefully on my shoulder. Normally, this kind of thing—cuddling—gets to me. In fact, it’s not something I’ve done since high school. I never let myself have time. I had, no, scratch that, I have goals, and this is my year to make history for the second time. That’s my plan, I have a mission, and a means to make it happen. I just didn’t expect her. Now that she’s here, my plans are still the same, but I’m hoping that the beautiful Aubree can be the perfect amount of distraction that we both need. From her comment earlier, I’m optimistic that she’s coming around to my way of thinking. We can keep this fun, and just between us. No pressure, just the way I like it.
When the movie ends, I close the laptop and then my eyes. I’m not ready to move. I like being close to her. I can’t explain it, and at this point, I don’t even care to try to. It is what it is, and we will be what we will be. I just hope that includes her underneath me. Hell, who am I kidding? This is Aubree, and even though I can’t believe I’m saying this, I’ll take her any way I can get her.
When the toter stops moving I know we’ve made our first stop. I assume Mom or Dad need a bathroom break. I keep my eyes closed, not wanting to hear the questioning that I’m sure will come from Kevin, or the pissed-off look I know will come from Rick. He’s got a thing for her, but I’ve got news for him. So, do I, apparently. And it’s not going away. I hear Jacob snoring and I know he’s not waking up anytime soon. I swear he can sleep through anything. I guess that’s a good thing with this kind of job.
I wait until I think the coast is clear to open my eyes. Sure enough, we’re all alone, well, unless you count the snoring Jacob. I don’t know if she needs anything, and I hate to wake her, but I do it anyway. Turning my head to the left, I place a featherlight kiss on top of her head. Then, reaching over with my right hand, I ever so gently run my index finger down her jaw. “Hey, Sleeping Beauty,” I say softly.
She stirs, and with another soft caress of her cheek, her eyes flutter open and then immediately close. “Please tell me I didn’t fall asleep.”
“I can’t do that.” I chuckle softly.
“I’m sorry.” She scrambles to move away from me, but I’m faster. I place my arm over her shoulders and pull her into my chest. “I don’t mind,” I tell her.
“You do make a good pillow,” she finally says. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”
“You were tired. There are no rules against taking naps.”
“I blame you. You got me this blanket and then let me snuggle up next to you. How am I supposed to resist that?” she asks, this time her voice is a little lighter, a little more awake.
“You’re not. I don’t want you to resist me.”
“Funny, I’m not sure I can even if I wanted to.”
Am I hearing this right? Is my mind playing tricks on me, because I’ve thought about nothing but her for weeks? “What does that mean, Bree?”
“It means that I know that I could be putting not only my heart but my job on the line. It means that even though I know that I’m going to fall hard for you, I’m okay with it not being more. It means that having a little piece of you is better than none at all. I’ve tried to ignore this, but it’s not going away.”
I tighten my grip, holding her just a little tighter than before. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“I know, but that doesn’t change the fact that you will.”
I hate the thought of hurting her. “You don’t know that. You called me an asshole, remember? Maybe we’ll find out that this attraction was simply wanting what he can’t have.”
“Maybe,” she says, not really meaning it. “Or maybe I’ll know what it’s like to take a risk on something I want. Maybe I’ll learn that not all men are like my father. And maybe I’ll learn that no matter what the outcome, I’m strong and independent and I will survive the heartache.”
“Fuck, Bree. That’s not what I want, not at all.” She’s crushing me here.
“I know that.” She sits up to look at me. “I know that’s not your intention, but I also know me. I know that if I let this go one step further, one minute longer, that I’m going to be falling harder and deeper. I know that you don’t want that, and I’m okay with it.” She pauses as if she needs to collect her thoughts. “Can we, maybe just keep whatever this is between us? We can be friends, and that’s all anyone needs to know. It will be easier for me when it’s all over.”
“Jesus, Aubree.” I want her. I want her more than I’ve ever wanted another, but that’s selfish because I can’t give her what she wants. “This is a bad idea,” I tell her, running my hands through my hair.
“No.” She surprises me by climbing onto my lap and straddling my hips. “I live on the safe side, always. Growing up, life was hard, and there wasn’t a lot of love or security. I’ve made that for myself, and I’m… complacent. No one has ever sparked this… need inside of me, not until you. I don’t want to play it safe with you, Blaine. I want everything you’re willing to give me. And when you walk away with my heart, I’ll have the memories and the knowledge that I was brave enough to go after what I want.”
“What do you want?” My hands grip her thighs. Internally, I’m pleading for her to say me; it’s all kinds of wrong and selfish, but with her, I can’t help it.
“You, Blaine, I want you.” She leans in and kisses the corner of my mouth. “The one rule is that this stays between us. I don’t want any of the crew or your family to know.”
“Anything you want,” I tell her. She sways her hips, rubbing herself over my cock and with that one move, I would promise her the world.
We hear voices and she hops off my lap, and stands. “I’m going to go get some snacks. Want anything?” she asks, as if she didn’t just light a fire inside of me with that sexy little move of hers.
Before I can respond, the door opens and Kevin walks in. He eyes me suspiciously, until Aubree distracts him. I know the feeling.
“Is that a homemade donut?” she asks, leaning into him to get a better look at what he’s holding in his hands.
“Yes, and this is my third one.” He moans as he takes another bite. “I might have to stop here on the way home and pick one up for Ash.”
“I’ll be quick, but I have to get me one of those.” She grabs her purse and dashes off the toter in search of a donut.
“What are you doing, Blaine?” Kevin asks immediately.
“What?” I’m able to pull off confused because I’m still processing what just happened. What we just agreed to.
“With Aubree, what are you doing?”
“We watched a movie.”
“Uh-huh,” he says, not believing a single word that comes out of my mouth. He shouldn’t, not when it comes to her.
“She’s different.” This is from Rick. I didn’t even hear him come back in.
“You think I don’t know that?” Fuck me, do
I know that. I can feel it too, and to be honest, it’s scaring the hell out of me.
“Just be good to her.”
I stand so that we are eye to eye. “Have you ever seen me treat a woman with anything but respect?” I ask, fists clenching at my sides.
“No.” He doesn’t say another word, just climbs behind the wheel to take his leg of the driving.
“Let’s have it, before she gets back,” I tell Kevin.
He holds his hands up in the air. “Nothing.” He grins. “Nothing at all.” He too takes his spot, which is now in the passenger seat. I’ll be taking the final leg of driving, that is if we decide to do it all in one day.
Aubree, true to her word, was quick as she climbs aboard. “Oh my word, Blaine, I got one for you and Jacob, if he ever wakes up.” Smiling, she hands me a box of donuts.
“This is a dozen,” I say, shaking my head, taking one out of the box.
“You can’t have just one.” She offers another to Kevin and Rick, and they take her up on it.
“Knock, knock,” Dad says, climbing aboard, Mom right behind him. “We wanted to touch base. You all thinking we drive the entire way today?”
“I don’t know,” Kevin chimes in. “Might be too early to tell. I say we play it by ear and see how we’re all feeling when we stop for lunch.”
“Where’s Jacob?” Mom asks.
“Sleeping,” I tell her.
“You guys have to try these.” Aubree holds the donut box open for them.
“Oh, Kevin already filled us in. We have our own box in the truck,” Dad tells her.
“All right, well, we’ll see you all at the next stop.” They head back to their truck and then we’re off.
“He does all the driving?” Aubree asks.
“Yeah.”
“We should probably stop then, I mean, unless Jacob or someone wants to give him a break. You all take shifts.”
“Yeah, more than likely we’ll stop and all get a room for the night.”
“I like that plan. I’ve never really been able to travel, so it sounds fun. I’ve only ever stayed in a motel, you know the kind where the door opens to the outside. Never stayed in a hotel before.”
