“I hate you, Reed,” she said.
“I know. That’s why the sex was so good. I felt you pumping that hate, honey. Driving those legs of yours up and down, wishing you could hurt me, knowing you were flooding me with your juices.”
“Juices? That’s gross.”
“Not to me,” I said. “I’ll take a drink right now.”
Abby showed me both middle fingers. “And just like you always are… nothing can be serious.”
Her voice crackled.
She blinked fast.
Oh, no, no, no…
“I just wanted an answer,” she said. “The truth. I thought I could get it now.”
“Why? You think I’m still feeling high from your pussy? Please. You should have caught me while my cum was spraying all over your belly button.”
“You’re a terrible person, Reed. No matter how famous you are. Or how much money you have. You are terrible. You know what? I hope you’re alone. I hope you’re lonely. You have this big house, a personal chef, a recording studio… but what does it matter if you’re alone?”
“I’m never alone, honey.”
“Yeah, because of money. You buy time from people.”
“You didn’t mind receiving it,” I said. “You’re getting paid, Abby. So shut up and enjoy it.”
“That’s what you think last night and this morning was?”
“What else would it be?” I asked. “You want some kind of fucking deal. Just admit it. You’re worried about royalties on a song you sing backup on. That’s the shit that makes nobody want to work with you. You can’t just get the chance and go with it. You have to have it all figured out beforehand. It’s fucking sad to watch. No wonder you sing the way you do now.”
Tears leaked from Abby’s eyes.
I was tearing into her.
I couldn’t stop though.
All of this had been building up for so long…
“Anything else you want to say?” Abby whispered.
“Plenty,” I said. “You can’t handle it. Go dress up and pretend to be someone else.”
“You’re one to talk,” she said. “You pretend to be someone else every day of your life. Don’t act like you don’t regret what you did to me. What you did to us. Don’t act like it doesn’t crush you.”
“Maybe it does,” I said. “Maybe you’re right. But you know what, honey? I just send one text and it all goes away. Someone will be here in your place in ten minutes, Abby. And she’ll be on her knees, appreciating her time with me.”
Abby turned and hurried away.
I balled my hands up into fists and watched her go.
My heart was racing.
Really fast.
Really hard.
Nobody did that to me.
Except Abby.
She did it back then.
She did now.
Did I hurt her just now?
Of course I did.
Sometimes the past would come back to bite you.
16
ABBY
We sang the last chorus for another rousing effort of HAPPY FUCKING BIRTHDAY. We stood in the foyer of an engineering company, singing to the receptionist. Now, in this case, the singing wasn’t all that bad. It was Bethany’s sixty-fifth birthday. I knew the entire thing of hiring us was a big joke, but Bethany reveled in it.
She smiled. Danced a little.
And when we finished, two young men in suits hugged her, and she began to cry.
I looked to my right and Rae was wiping her eyes.
“Why are you crying?” I whispered to her.
“I love when old people cry,” she whispered back. “Leave me alone. I’m hormonal.”
“Are you pregnant?” Jess asked on the other side of Rae.
“What?” Rae asked. “No. I’m getting my period this week.”
“At least you hope so,” I said.
“I know when to make someone pull out,” Rae announced.
Everyone looked at Rae.
“Happy Birthday!” she announced and clapped her hands.
We clapped and laughed.
Sasha all but lunged forward to the desk where she spoke with the two men in the suits. They must have been the owners of the business. Or the bosses.
Sasha always handled that part of the gig.
We just showed up, sang, and eventually got paid.
“Is she done yet?” Jess asked. “I need a cigarette.”
“You’re jumpy today,” I said. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m jumpy?” Jess asked, looking past Rae to me.
Then I had both Jess and Rae looking at me.
“What?” I asked.
“You’ve been a raging bitch,” Rae whispered. “I don’t know what happened, but something-”
“Thank you so much,” Sasha said in a loud voice.
I wanted to know what the hell Rae and Jess were talking about.
I mean, yeah, sure, things sucked a little.
When I came back home from Reed’s place, I took a long shower and then curled up into my bed and fought the urge to cry. I didn’t need the shower, but I needed to wash away anything that reminded me of him. As far as crying went, it just hurt that he refused to talk about what happened the night he kicked me out of the tour bus.
That was a day ago.
I spent the day and the night in bed.
When Valerie bothered me, I told her I had a stomach bug.
She made me eat soup and drink ginger ale.
I would have preferred cookies and vodka, which I did get later in the day.
Alone and thinking… not a good combination.
I replayed that night over and over.
We both had issues at that point. We weren’t together but pretty much were. Nothing had been official or given a title. That meant if Reed wanted to go fuck some groupies (this was before the world of Line Whores) he could. That meant if I wanted to enjoy myself with someone, I could do that too.
Did we ever do that?
I wasn’t sure.
I didn’t really care.
I liked Reed’s company. I liked laughing with him. I liked flirting with him. I liked having crazy, rock star sex with him.
And then the world suddenly blew up…
My thoughts were broken apart by a hand touching my lower back.
At some point Rae and Jess had walked away.
Sasha was still talking to the other two guys.
I stood alone, turning my head, looking at some tall, string bean looking guy with a perfect smile, touching my lower back.
“You have a great voice,” String Bean said to me.
“I know I do,” I said.
“Oh, a little confident and cocky there,” he said. “I like that. If you don’t mind me saying, you also have a great body. I wouldn’t mind listening to you sing to me… privately… one on one…”
His hand moved an inch down and I swung my right hand.
My fist uppercut against his jaw and his head snapped back.
“Oh, shit!” someone yelled. “She just punched Dale!”
Sasha looked at me and her eyes went wide.
“Don’t ever fucking touch me, you pig,” I yelled. “Who the fuck do you think you are? You think you can just grab at my ass and get away with it? You fucking scumbag.”
Jess appeared in front of me.
“Shut up,” she growled at me. “They have their phones out. Turn and walk away.”
My chin quivered and Jess nodded.
“I know,” she whispered.
String Bean wiped his bottom lip of blood. “Maybe don’t dress with such tight pants next time.”
I lunged forward and Jess pushed me away.
Before I could yell at her, she spun around and took a swing at String Bean.
“Jess! Stop!” Sasha yelled.
String Bean took a shot from Jess.
When Jess turned back around, she hurried toward me and hugged me.
We walked out of the building toge
ther.
“Hey, Jess?” I asked.
“What’s up?”
“I think I might need a cigarette.”
* * *
I didn’t smoke a cigarette.
But I did order two drinks to start when we went to the restaurant that Sasha picked out. She said it was a business meeting.
In other words, she wanted to yell at me for what I had done.
She was right.
We were supposed to be working.
Not attacking customers.
But my ass wasn’t something to be bought or used.
Tell that to Reed, right?
When Sasha sat down, I waved my hands.
“Get it off your chest,” I said. “Give it to me.”
Sasha looked at me. “It’s your turn to talk, Abby. You’re going through something. Please talk about it.”
“What?”
“First off, that guy touched your butt?” Sasha asked. “He’s an idiot. I talked to the two guys who own the company and they apologized. Now, that’s not the first time it’s happened to you.”
“I’m not talking about this stuff,” I said.
“You need to talk about everything else,” Rae said.
“What’s everything else?” I asked.
“Come on, Abby,” Jess said.
“About Reed? I mean, FILTHY LINE?”
“Yeah,” Sasha said.
I shook my head. “Believe me, it’s nothing. It’s history.”
“Tell us about it,” Rae said. “You obviously have feelings for Reed. I’m sure you slept with him. At the very least, tell us what that’s like. A rock star? Fuck me…”
“Rae, stop,” Jess said. “What if those feelings are beyond him being a rock star?”
“Oh, shit, do you love him?” Rae asked.
“Love?” I yelled. “No. Never. Not a chance. Love him? Love Reed? No. No way.”
“Okay then,” Sasha said.
I downed the rest of the first drink and went to work on the second one.
“Look. It’s simple. My mother played her life safe after my father passed away. She wanted my brother and I to live a good and simple life. Joe became a lawyer. I took off to Nashville. I talk to Joe maybe three times a year now. I talk to my mother maybe six times a year. Do we all hate each other? Nope. I’m just the outcast. I loved that role. I was good. Popular locally. Things were happening. Then I met Reed. The band was just getting popular. He and I had… a thing. I don’t know. Nothing was official.”
“Friends with benefits?” Rae asked.
“Sure. Call it that. I gave up some gigs for him. I thought things were going somewhere. Maybe in the back of my mind I thought I could rise with the band. Not as part of the band, but on my own. I just loved singing. And then everything went bad. I don’t want to talk about it. Being in the studio now… it just brings it all back.”
Rae reached across the table. “Sorry, Abby.”
“I didn’t realize,” Sasha said. “So singing with us must be torture.”
“It’s not,” I said. “I mean, it’s a pain in the ass, but I kind of like you.”
“But it’s not what you want,” Sasha said.
“And you want this?” Jess asked.
“I’m running my own business,” Sasha said. “I’ve considered expanding. Bring in more singers. Finding bigger events. I was going to talk to you all about that. Maybe try to move from the gimmicky stuff to something else. Or maybe we can keep the gimmick and do covers.”
“Dress up like famous singers?” Rae asked.
“Yeah,” Sasha said.
“I like that,” I said. “But we should also do our own thing too.”
“You’re the one with the connections,” Jess said with a grin. “Get us into a studio.”
“Oh, bang Reed again,” Rae said. “Then maybe…”
She gasped.
“What?” I asked.
“Your face is red,” Rae said.
“No it’s not.”
“You slept with him again?” Sasha asked.
“Stop,” I said.
“Is that why you’re so mean today?” Rae asked. “Was it not good? Or did something happen?”
“You know what?” I called out. “I could be out with someone right now.”
“Who?” Jess asked.
“Forget FILTHY LINE… I’m talking about RAUNCHY RECKS…”
“What?” Rae asked.
“I got Ven’s number,” I said. “He saw me at the studio and stopped to ask me out.”
“What shampoo do you use?” Sasha asked.
“Why?”
“All you do is attract rock stars,” she said with a smile.
Jess rubbed her shoulder against mine. “There, I rubbed against her. Maybe I can sleep with Nash.”
“Nash?” I asked.
“Oh, he’s my guy,” Jess said. “He is the hottest man ever in the world. I don’t care if he’s with someone. I want to-”
“Save it for later,” Sasha said to Jess. “When you’re alone.”
“Oh, I will. But I won’t be alone.”
“She has a friend,” I said.
“A friend who you pretend is Nash?” Rae asked.
“He doesn’t need to know that,” Jess said. “A woman has to come somehow, right?”
We all laughed.
“Are you going to call Ven?” Rae asked. “He’s crazy hot. And crazy too. If you don’t call him, can I have his number?”
They all stared at me.
I had the number in my phone from when I texted him.
It was tempting.
Very tempting…
More than anything else, it would make Reed insanely jealous.
* * *
I waited outside for Ven.
My heart danced all over my chest.
Though probably for the wrong reason.
I looked at my phone and switched between Ven and Reed.
The whole notion of them both being rock stars really didn’t matter all that much to me. That was more of a fantasy thing. I had dealt with rock stars many times in my life.
To Sasha, Rae, and Jess, this was such a big deal.
Again, the fantasy of it all.
For me… what the fuck was I actually doing?
In a way I wanted to chase Reed’s memory away for good.
Seeing him again, hitting him, being near him, talking to him, flirting with him, kissing him, fucking him, fine… that was all good. But it was out of my system.
Was he ever going to settle down?
I doubted it.
Reed had a revolving door type theory on women.
He kept his heart guarded and his jeans open.
Which made sense.
The second you wanted to see his heart, his dick was out, and when you look at Reed’s dick… well… it was impossible to not be hypnotized by it.
That’s how he always was.
And believe me, I wasn’t suggesting to myself that Ven was going to be any different.
He was picking me up with one thing in mind.
Getting between my legs.
A black limo pulled up to the apartment and I let out a laugh.
The back door opened and out stepped Ven.
Ripped jeans, a tight shirt, toned muscles that were sort of hidden behind his tattoos. Wearing sunglasses even though it was dark out. Rings and bracelets on his fingers and wrists. His hair messy in a sexy way that suggested he had just rolled out of bed from fucking a few women at the same time.
He sidestepped and put his arm around the open limo door.
“Your ride is here, sweetie,” he said.
I took a few steps and he put his hand out.
“Your other ride… is here…”
He pointed to his dick.
I smiled. “Down, boy. I’m not that kind of woman.”
“That’s what they all say,” Ven said. “Once you get into the limo, everything changes.”
That’s the plan, Ven…
that’s the plan…
I climbed into the limo and let out a laugh.
There were neon red lights around the top of the limo.
Drinks everywhere.
A small, flat surface for the drugs.
Ven got into the limo next to me and shut the door.
He leaned forward and knocked on the window that separated the front and back.
The limo started to move.
“Drink?” Ven offered.
“Of course,” I said.
“A little something to get the night going?” he asked and pointed to the flat surface.
“I’m good,” I said.
“I’m not,” he said.
He leaned forward and put his ass right near my face.
I hear him taking a deep breath through his nose.
There were skulls on the back of his jeans.
It made me smile.
Everything was wrong, bad, and rock star about him.
It was what I needed.
He sat down next to me and put his head back.
He put an arm around me.
“Look, sweetie, I get it,” he said to me. “I know you have a history with those fake rock stars. It doesn’t bother me. You’re singing on their new tune, right?”
“How did you find out about that?” I asked. “And about me?”
Ven lifted his sunglasses. His green eyes were very sexy.
“You want to know?” Ven asked.
“Yeah.”
“Put your mouth to use and I’ll tell you,” he said. “You suck, I talk.”
I put my hand to his leg. “I’ve played this game before, Ven. I’m not a cheap whore.”
“But you are a whore, right?”
“I hit a guy in the mouth today for trying to touch my ass.”
“You can hit me if you want,” Ven said. “I’m into it. Although I have to warn you, I’m not going to just touch your ass. I’ll make you realize how lucky you are that you have more than one spot to enjoy with my dick…”
He was smooth and totally convincing.
Ven stared at me.
Anything and everything was on the table with him.
And my mind and heart were stuck on Reed.
* * *
When we stepped out of the limo, there were cheers all around.
I gasped and couldn’t believe the crowd that was waiting.
“I guess the news got leaked,” Ven said to me.
A FILTHY Enemy: a filthy line novel Page 15
