by Mj Fields
“He trusts her, and that’s not an easy thing for him to do.” Dad chuckles.
Collin has been through more than anyone I have ever encountered. Perks of a small town—blissfully ignorant of much of the harsh realities just beyond the borders of Blue Valley.
Mom nudges me. “Penny for your thoughts.”
I shake my head.
“Putting words to feelings doesn’t make them any more real, Kendall Rose. Sharing them with someone who loves you just helps sort out your worries.”
“Probably gonna get in trouble for waking you up but didn’t want to leave here without telling you that someday I’m going to be your favorite uncle.”
Mom and I both look toward the monitor when we hear Ben’s voice. Then we hear a loud smack.
“Little man, really? That’s the second time you’ve slapped me in the face.”
One of the boys laughs, and then the other starts.
“I suppose, at your age, it’s as funny as a fart at five and a boner at ten.”
I palm my face, and my dad chuckles as he walks up and stands on the other side of me as we all listen to Ben talk to the boys.
“I know Alex will probably be the one to make you fall in love for the first time, and believe it or not, it will be with a legit dog.”
Smack.
“And now you?”
The boys laugh.
“We can laugh and mess around in a minute. I have important things to tell you.” He pauses. “Okay, now that I have your attention, let’s get back to the fact that I’m going to be your favorite uncle.”
They babble for a moment, and Ben laughs, but then they’re quiet.
“Jake will be the one to give you your first beer and condom, and Grandpa John will teach you to hunt and love the land, but I’m gonna be the one who makes you fall in love with music and get in touch with all those things called feelings.
“Music is a gift, little men. It helps you figure out all those emotions you’re going to experience and give you a place to release them, which means you will play an instrument. But most of all, I’m going to be your go-to guy for advice on girls. And yeah, you have a big family, but unlike them, I kind of had to figure it out on my own, which is why I’m now an expert. Not everyone in the world can tell you the moment they realized they were falling in love, but I can, and I will. And yeah, fucking is fun.”
I cover my mouth, and Mom shakes her head.
“But I can tell you that the day I make love to your aunt Kendall, the prettiest girl in the world, is gonna be the day I realize that fucking—”
“Oh, dear God, please don’t let them mimic him,” Mom actually prays.
“—wasn’t shit compared to making love.”
Smack.
“Okay I probably deserve that, but little men, I’m serious.”
Smack.
Giggle.
“Dude, you just pissed on me again.”
Smack.
Giggle.
Smack.
Whack.
“Fine, let’s get this shit done and go eat.”
I look at the ground and try to hide my smile.
Epic fail.
“Are you falling in love with him, Kendall?” Mom asks.
“Without a doubt,” I answer as I look up at her and Dad slowly.
I’m met with smiling eyes … two sets of them.
20
All For You
Ben
I left Kendall at Tessa and Collin’s, knowing she would want to spend some time with her since she didn’t go to the hospital. And yeah, I feel a bit guilty about that, but being selfish with her is something that’s probably going to happen for a lifetime.
As I clean up the site a bit and make it all picture-perfect, I can’t help smiling while thinking this is the first time I’ve ever looked at a woman and thought, I can’t wait to grow old with her.
Her hair won’t be blonde, probably not as full, and her lips that are a bit too big for her face won’t be as plush as pillows, but she will always be beautiful, she will always be mine, and she will always be treated the way a woman should be.
Never liked the idea of getting old, but for the first time in my life, it has an appeal. So much so that I’m driven to voice it to the world.
“I can’t wait to grow old with you, Kendall Ross.”
Then I laugh when the song “It’s a Beautiful Day” by U2 comes from my boom box.
“Sure as hell is,” I say as I toss some wood on the firepit to have it ready to cook Kendall and me dinner over an open flame. “Sure as hell is.”
When John’s truck pulls up in front of my campsite, I walk over to the open window. “You feel like a drink?”
“Feel like ten, but Maggie and I are heading over to Jack’s place.”
“How is your brother? Still single?”
John nods once. “Some things you just never get over.”
I look past him to Kendall. “I can imagine.”
Kendall leans over and gives her dad a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks for the ride.”
“See you”—he pauses—“when I see you.”
When she starts to open the passenger’s door, I yell, “Hey,” and run around the front of the truck. “What did I tell you about that?”
John laughs. “This one won’t argue with you like Tessa would, but I’m betting she’d wait till you’re asleep and smack you upside the head with a cast-iron skillet.”
“You gonna beat me up in my sleep for opening the door for you?” I ask as she hops out.
“You wake up with an unexplainable headache, you can safely assume that’s what happened.”
John laughs again as he puts the truck in drive. “Be good, kids.”
She and I watch as John pulls away then I turn and smile. “You gonna kiss me or not?”
She grins. “That’s my line.”
“Must be, seeing as how it’s not working on me.”
She sighs, smiles softly, and then wraps her arms around my waist, hugging me, and looks up.
“So, I ask for a kiss, and I get a hug? I wonder what would happen if I asked for—”
“Shut up and kiss me.”
I kiss her softly because she looks fucking beautiful but definitely exhausted.
“Tired?” I ask against her lips.
She nods.
“Give me ten minutes, and I’ll rectify that situation.” I step away and hurry into the cabin, grab the bag I decided not to unpack since we didn’t spend shit for time here, and then rush back out.
“What are you doing?” she asks as she turns in a circle, looking around.
“Gonna cook you dinner,” I answer, pulling the hammock out from the bag.
“I can help,” she says then looks back at me. “You brought a hammock?”
“Double hammock.” I wink.
She smiles. “I love it.”
“Nothing like taking a nap in the great outdoors.”
“Did you pack bug spray?”
“You’re looking at an Eagle Scout; of course I brought bug spray, and if I didn’t, I could walk through the forest, gather a few roots and some berries, and whip you up some.”
“And here I thought you couldn’t get any swoonier.”
“You think that’s swoon-worthy?” I walk over and take her hand, pulling her toward the hammock. “Little Ross, you haven’t even gotten to the tip of my ability to swoon. Now rest while I make you the best steak you’ve ever eaten and do it on an open flame.”
“My, my, Ben Sawyer”—she grins as she sits—“you are a man of many hidden talents.”
“Rest up. I’m gonna make you a meal.”
Is it wrong that I love how she didn’t catch the double entendre in that statement? Yeah, a little bit. Even more wrong? It makes her even hotter.
“Then I’m making breakfast.”
“Deal.”
Ten minutes later, she is sound asleep in the hammock, a bottle of wine is chilling on ice, steaks are grilling, onions c
aramelizing, and vegetables are roasting on the open fire. For the first time in weeks, I get inspired.
Normally, that’s a welcome rush, but right now, I don’t want to have my nose in a composition book, writing about how fucking good life is when I could just bask in the reality that it actually is. However, she’s asleep, and I want her to wake the way she fell asleep last night—falling deeper.
I stand up from my seat and walk in to grab my guitar out of the cabin. I had all the intention of singing her to sleep tonight anyway, so why not play some while she is sleeping?
Sitting on the picnic table, watching her sleep, I strum softly on my guitar.
I seriously need to have a talk with my inner rocker about the music that’s been playing in my head these past couple days. I’m one Survivor song away from a Sun Country wine cooler and a Virginia Slim. But after last night and this morning, both receiving verbal and physical confirmation that she kind of digs it, I’ll go with it.
Thankfully, instead of Survivor, I’m hit with some Tesla.
“Who’s the one that makes you happy? Or maybe, who’s the one always on your mind? And who is the reason you’re livin’ for? Who’s the reason for your smile?”
I see a smile creep up on her face and continue singing.
“I can’t think about nothin’ but your good, good love.”
She sits up, hangs her long legs over the side of the double hammock, and pats the spot next to her.
Still singing, still playing, I stand and slowly make my way toward her as she stretches her arms, raising her shirt and giving me a peek of her belly, while she rakes her teeth over her bottom lip.
The feeling I get when she looks at me this way is a better feeling than singing in front of a sold-out crowd in Dublin.
Instead of sitting next to her, I stay standing and finish the song. When I’m done, I swing the guitar over my shoulder and step toward her, giving her plump lips a kiss.
“Taking requests?”
Against my lips, Kendall whispers jokingly, “Make him go away.”
I look back and see her brother Jake and his girl, Sarah.
“We brought corn.” Sarah smiles, holding up a brown paper grocery bag.
I look back at Kendall, “You still want me to get rid of him?”
She shakes her head but says, “Yes.”
Laughing, I ask, “Which one we going with, sweets?”
She stands up and looks past me. “I’ll help you husk it.”
“Mom insisted we bring it down for you; we’re not sticking around,” Jake says, eyeing the steaks.
“Might as well stay and help us eat all this.”
“You know any Eminem?” Jake asks. “NAS?’
“Savage Garden?” Sarah asks as she sets the bag down and pulls out an ear of corn.
“Please say no,” Jake grumbles.
“I’ll be your dream, I’ll be your wish, I’ll be your fantasy,” Kendall sings, and Sarah joins in.
I pick up my guitar and begin to play.
“What happened to bro code, man?” Jake rolls his eyes at me.
“I love you more with every breath,” I sing along with the girls.
“I want to bathe with you in the sea,” Jake sings loudly, purposely off-key.
As I continue playing, I hear an ATV coming down the lane.
“Great, Jake. The noise police heard your bellowing, and now we’re in trouble.” Kendall throws a handful of corn silk at him.
“I’ll love you more with every breath, truly, madly, deeply do.” I smile as I sing to Kendall.
When the park employee jumps out of the vehicle, Sarah hurries over to them.
I don’t look, and I don’t stop singing, not when my girl is looking at me like I hung the fucking stars.
“You know anything older? A little Marvin Gaye or Lionel Richie?” It’s the woman from the park entry booth.
“We keep meeting like this, and my girl’s gonna think something’s up.”
“So, it is true. You’re dating little Miss Kendall?”
“There a billboard up or something? If not, how can I make that happen so everyone knows she’s off the market?”
“No billboard needed in Blue Valley, young man.” she winks. “But if this music thing ever kicks off for you, I might hang up a poster in my bedroom right next to Tom Selleck.”
“Mom.” Sarah covers her face in embarrassment.
“Sally.” Jake smiles. “You wanna join us for dinner?”
“Came for the music, boy, not the calories.” The woman, Sally, Sarah’s mom, walks over, gives him a hug, and then looks at the table. “That Ross sweet corn?”
“Sure is.” Jake nods. “Dropped some off on your porch before we came here.”
“You off tomorrow?” Sarah asks.
“Girl, I’m never off.” Sally laughs. “But I’ll get husking when I get home.”
She looks at me. “Aren’t you supposed to be playing music, hot stuff?”
I look at Kendall, who looks up from the corn.
“Get singing, Sawyer.”
I begin the intro to “All For You” by Sister Hazel, and everyone, Sally included, sings along.
Standing with my arm around Kendall and hers around me, we wave as the last of our dinner guests leave.
“Sorry about all that?”
I laugh. “Did you have fun?”
She scrunches up her nose and nods. “I so did.”
“The truth?”
“I’m sorry, I—”
“Sweets, I had the best time I’ve had in forever.”
“For real?” She smiles and turns into me.
“Got to meet half the town, I think.” I laugh.
“Well, at least everyone camping here.” She laughs, too.
I lean in and kiss her. “Can we get ready for bed?”
She looks around.
“We already cleaned up.”
“We should make sure the fire is out, turn off the music, and—”
“I’m gonna kiss you because, aside from a few pecks on the cheek tonight, I haven’t been able to.” I put my hands on her hips. “And I’m gonna dance with you because that hasn’t happened yet either. Then you’re gonna get into one of my T-shirts and a pair of my boxers because I find it incredibly sexy. I’m gonna throw on a pair of sweats, because I’m two pairs down of fresh boxers, and we’re going to lay in that hammock and kiss until we fall asleep.”
“Outside?” she whispers.
“Outside.”
“What if it gets cold?”
“We could be in the Arctic, bare as the day we were born, and the heat between us would keep us warm enough to survive for years.”
“Ben?” she whispers again.
I run my hands up her back. “Yeah, Kendall?”
“Don’t let me break my promise.”
21
Redneck Girl
Kendall
I wake up inside the cabin. Ben carried me in last night when it had started to rain. In a very sexy, sleepy voice, he mumbled, “Artic, not the Amazon.”
I spread out on the bed and inhale the scent of coffee and Ben and smile, inside and out, thinking about the last three mornings waking up like this and dreading the next two years of my life.
I sit up and look around. On the small bedside table made of logs, there is a rose and a note.
Kendall,
You were sleeping so peacefully. I lay here for forty-five minutes trying to force myself to wake you up just to say goodbye.
Couldn’t do it.
I made coffee and eggs, thinking the smell would wake you so I wouldn’t have to.
It didn’t.
I packed up and decided that, if I woke you, goodbye would suck for both of us. Neither would enjoy the coffee or the steak and eggs, and we would be fighting before I left.
I kissed you and told you something you and I both know is true. Remember that when you get pissed at me and before you call me and chew me out. Understand that I’m a fucking g
entleman, and I can promise you that you will always come several times before me come before me.
Okay, that wasn’t meant to be sexual, but well, it’s not a lie, sweets, and this is the only blank piece of paper I have.
Two weeks never sounded so long.
Yours,
Ben
I grab my phone off the nightstand and call his number. He answers immediately.
“You know how many times I’ve almost turned around because I felt like a dick for not saying goodbye?”
I smile. “It’s okay. Would have been harder.”
He sighs. “Well, I’m glad you’re not pissed.”
I stand up and walk toward the small two-person table under one of the two windows and grab my cup of coffee, blowing on it as I eye the steak and eggs, then ask, “Why would I be?” I stop when I spot exactly why out the window. “You took my truck!”
“Okay, first, you say it like it’s a bad thing when you have a two-year-old four-door Ford—”
“I drive a perfectly good Chevy, Ben Sawyer.”
“You call this heap of junk perfect?” He laughs.
“Oh, now you’ve pissed her off,” I huff. “If she breaks down—”
“Little Ross, she is broken down, just still making it from point A to point B on pure luck and just barely. I have a spring in my ass, no damn music, and when’s the last time old Bertha here had a good wax?”
“You even wash her and—”
“She’ll disintegrate?”
“Her name’s not Bertha.”
“She is no doubt a Bertha. Battle Ax Bertha.”
To that, I can’t help laughing.
“You have Rosie for two weeks.”
“I should beat her to hell.”
“She’s built Ford tough; she can handle it.”
“I’m going to get in your truck and come take mine back.”
“Which is why I didn’t wake you up.”
“Don’t do that again, please.”
“What? Leave without a goodbye or take old Battle Ax Bertha so my girl can sing along to any damn song she wants without wearing earplugs, Kendall? I mean, do you even know how unsafe that is?”
