Kip doesn’t wince, but I see the pain my words inflict regardless. He never was able to hide his emotions from me.
“We finished the show.”
He waits for me to react, and when I don’t, he presses his tongue into his cheek, steeling a breath before he continues.
“I mean, we finished filming. We still have some post-production to do, but it’ll be done back at the school before we turn in the final product.” He swallows. “I think the mini-series will be live on the web by the end of November.”
“Congratulations.”
I can’t help how flat the word is when I release it, can’t help that I’m already turning to leave, but Kip’s hand shoots out to hook my elbow, stopping me in my tracks.
“Skyler, I’m leaving,” he breathes against my neck, his body inching closer and closer. “I’m going back to California. Please,” he pleads, his voice breaking. “Don’t make me leave like this.”
I close my eyes against the pain splitting my chest, against the urge to weep.
“What do you want from me, Kip?” I ask on a breath.
“Forgiveness.”
I turn then, pulling from his grip on my arm. “Forgiveness for what, exactly?”
I need to hear him say it. I need to hear him say he was wrong, that he understands why I was upset — why I still am.
Kip rolls his lips together, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose before he hangs his hands on his hips and looks off in the distance down Greek Row.
I shake my head. “Kip, what happened that night… what happened all last semester… it killed me.”
His nose flared, eyes watering, but he wouldn’t look at me.
“Whether you realize it and want to admit it or not, you chose the show over me.” I swallow. “You chose her over me.”
“Natalia is a professional.”
“Natalia is a bitch,” I correct, not even a little sorry when he finally looks at me with a frown etched in his brows. “She’s conniving and smarter than you give her credit for, and she knew what she was doing.”
“Why are you attacking her? You’re the one who picked her for the part!”
“And that was my mistake. Now, can you admit to yours?”
Kip pinches the bridge of his nose on a long breath. “Skyler, nothing happened. I was directing them through the shower scene so we could get it right. Natalia was there because I asked her to be, she wasn’t trying to—”
“You forgot,” I interrupted, and my bottom lip trembled as I waited for his eyes to meet mine once more. “You forgot to pick me up. For our date. For our anniversary. And then I walked in on you touching another woman, naked, in the shower. Let me ask you this, Kip. If it were me who forgot, who you had to track down, who you found holding another man in the shower — would you be okay with it?”
“Skyler, it’s work. It’s nothing—”
“Don’t do that to me,” I say curtly. “Don’t make it seem like I don’t support you, like I haven’t always supported you. I understood when you needed to move across the country to go to the right school to get you where you want to be. I understood even when you came back here and you explained that I wouldn’t see you much. I understood when your time was wrapped up in filming. I even understood why you didn’t see it at first, the way Natalia looked at you, the things she was doing to make sure I felt threatened.” I swallow. “But I have a right to be upset over what happened, and I deserve a proper apology.”
“I’m sorry,” Kip says quickly, reaching for my hands. He holds them up and presses his lips to the knuckles. “I’m sorry for hurting you.”
I nod, biting my lip.
It still isn’t enough.
“I have to go,” I whisper, pulling my hands from his. “It’s Pref Night and I have a lot to do.”
“Skyler, please,” Kip begs when I turn. “I don’t want to leave like this. I… I don’t even know what we are anymore.”
I pause with my hand on the front doorknob, my breath hitched in my throat, tears swelling in my eyes until the wood panel blurs.
“That makes two of us.”
I open the door, close it behind me, and press my back to the wood, smoothing my breaths as much as I can as I listen to Kip shuffle off the front porch.
Then, I lose it.
“WE NEED TO CALL the florist,” my boss, Brittany, says in a slight panic through the phone. I just left the office not even an hour ago, and I hadn’t even had the chance to put my leggings on before my phone was ringing.
But this is how it is working with Brittany Nova.
That bitch doesn’t know how to not work.
“I called them this morning. The arrangements are all set, centerpieces complete, bouquets ready, they’re just finishing up prepping for the arch, which they’ll build on site,” I say, grabbing a wine glass from the cabinet and a half-full bottle of Malbec from the fridge.
“Oh, good. Okay, next, we need to finalize the wedding cocktail.”
“Already done. Bride and I decided on tequila, and the bartenders whipped up a few options for her this afternoon. She loved the one with grapefruit. We’re calling it, Rose in Love and I already have the team making a sign for the bar.”
“Rose in Love,” she repeats. “I don’t hate it as much as I thought I would. Okay, the seven-tier cheesecake — God help us — we need to—”
“Made to perfection. I stopped by the bakery on my way home. They made a smaller tier for me to taste and inspect. All the filling options are exactly as we asked, the colors are remarkable… although, I’ll be honest, the poor team of bakers looked like they were ready to collapse from decorating it. They’ll deliver it at four-thirty tomorrow evening, and I already made sure the venue has an entire fridge saved for it. They’ll store each tier separately and assemble in the kitchen during dinner, rolling it out just in time to be cut.”
“Brilliant,” Brittany breathed, and I could hear the pen sliding across paper as she ticked that off the list. “The surfboard guest book.”
“Set up with gold, silver, and black Sharpies right next to the Polaroid table.”
“The lights—”
“Are all prepped and ready, along with speakers and mics, and the team will be bringing them over at ten tomorrow morning so we have plenty of time to get it all set up the way we need. The only thing I’m waiting to hear back on are whether the tree lanterns are too heavy for the limbs to support, but don’t worry — we have gold bird feeder holders on stand-by if needed.”
“Fireworks?”
“I’m pouring a glass of wine and am about to start tying the ribbons on the sparklers now. Buckets are already decorated. The team and I have a plan of attack for lighting all three-hundred-and-forty-five guests. And the pyrotechnics have forty-thousand dollars’ worth of fireworks that will put Disney to shame and a boat to set them off of from the middle of the lake. We tested last night, and the lawn will be perfect for viewing.”
There’s a brief pause before Brittany lets out a dramatic exhale, and I can almost see her slumping back in her chair. “How did I get so lucky to find someone like you?”
“You say that now…”
She chuckles. “Okay, so I guess all that’s left for me to do is—”
“Is to go to the rehearsal dinner and have fun.”
“That’s never been a part of this job.”
I snort. “Well, okay, maybe fun is the wrong term. But relax. Jenna and Howard will be there and they are well prepped to take care of everything. You just focus on making sure the bride is calm, and keep her mother away from the schnapps.”
“That might be the hardest job of the evening.”
“That’s why we saved that one for you.”
She lets out a puff of a laugh. “Thank you, Jess. For everything. Try to get some rest tonight, too.”
“I plan on it, right after I put the final touches on the seating chart board.”
“See you in the morning.”
“Bright and ea
rly, boss.”
When we hang up, I chuckle to myself and leave my phone on the counter, bringing my wine glass and the rest of the bottle over to the dining room table — which has been more of my craft table lately than anything, lately. Since Ashlei moved out of our place and in with Brandon, and Erin spends most of her time at Bear’s, there’s never really any reason to clean it.
A ping of loneliness filters through me, but it’s gone just as quickly as it appears.
If I’m being honest with myself, I’ve enjoyed the last couple of months on my own. I’ve been able to throw all my energy into the job I worked so hard to get, into making a name for myself with my boss and the rest of our team. Even though summer is the slowest season for weddings in Florida, we still had several weddings each month — all with affluent brides who expected the best from us.
I’ve been thankful to not have any distractions.
But just because Kade and Jarrett both respected my wishes and left me alone for the summer, doesn’t mean I haven’t been thinking of them every single day.
I don’t know what I thought I was doing when I asked for the summer, as if them giving me some time and space would somehow give me clarity. Like I would have some sort of epiphany. Instead, I feel like I’ve sunk even deeper into thick, nasty mud that keeps seeping up, up, up. At this point, it’s got to be at least chest-high and threatening to take me all the way under if I don’t do something soon.
The issue is that I have no idea what to do.
I meant what I told the girls back in May — I love Kade and Jarrett both.
But just like the girls had so gently reminded me then, I also know I can’t have them both.
And maybe that’s the truth that’s kept me latching onto this notion that somehow, space and time would help. Maybe, if I was being brutally honest with myself, I just didn’t want to make the decision and was putting it off for as long as I could.
What a selfish, awful thing to do.
I’m halfway through my first glass of wine and first dozen sparklers when my phone buzzes loud on the counter, moving along the granite to the beat of my ringtone.
“Hey, Herb,” I say when I see the front desk’s number on the screen. “Another package?”
“Not this time, Miss Vonnegut. You have a visitor. A Mister Kade Brewer. Shall I send him up?”
Ice freezes my veins, and I pause for so long, Herb clears his throat to remind me to answer.
“Um, yes,” I say weakly. “Yes.”
I stare at the phone for too long after the call ends, unable to breathe, let alone fix my appearance or think about what the hell I’m going to say once Kade makes it up to our floor.
I’m still frozen in place when there’s a soft knock on the front door, and I snap out of my daze, slamming back the last of my wine before I answer it.
The sight of Kade turns my knees to jelly.
His style has changed so much since I first met him. I’ve watched him grow from a boy into a man, from a silly flirt into someone who knows what they want and isn’t afraid to go for it. Still, to see him standing here in fitted navy dress pants and a sleek white button down, a sports jacket folded over his left arm and mocha oxfords on his feet, it’s enough to shock me silent.
His short hair is styled, his face clean-shaven, skin dark and smooth from the summer sun. I know as president of his fraternity, he’s likely spent most of his days at the beach or the campus pool, and he has the tan to show for it.
And then there are his eyes, endless pools of honey gold and warm maple syrup brown swirling together.
And he’s watching me like he’s a sick dog and I’m the motherfucker with a gun about to put him out of his misery.
After a long pause and not a peep from either of us, he finally swallows, standing a little straighter as he says, “I know the last day of summer isn’t technically until September, but school is starting back up next week, which signals fall to me.” He shakes his head. “And honestly, I couldn’t stand to be away from you. Not for one second more.” His shoulders slump. “Please, Jess.”
I close my eyes on a breath, and when I open them again, Kade’s brows are bent together, his eyes searching mine for a response.
For permission.
So I simply take a step forward, and in the next breath, I’m swept into his arms.
Everything about him encompasses me — his big, muscular arms, his broad, warm chest, his hands splaying on my rib cage, his scent, earthy and strong. I feel like a little girl again in those arms, like I’m free.
Like I’m safe.
Kade exhales at the embrace, burying his face in my neck. “Fucking hell, I’ve missed you so much.”
I squeeze him back. “I’ve missed you, too.”
He doesn’t release his hold on me for a long time, and when he finally does, he keeps his hands on my hips and just barely pulls back, watching me, waiting.
“Come inside,” I say, grabbing his hand and tugging him out of the hallway. I close the door behind us and head for the couch, sitting down first and patting the cushion next to me so Kade does the same.
For a long pause, we just sit there, staring at each other, the silence somehow comfortable and awkward all at once.
“You look… weird,” he finally comments, arching a brow as he takes in my attire.
I look down, realizing I’d only half-changed out of my work clothes, so I’m wearing an over-sized Kappa Kappa Beta t-shirt and a bright orange pencil skirt.
“Shit,” I say on a laugh, running a hand back through my hair that’s no doubt just as much of a mess. “It’s been a busy day. Busy week. We have a wedding at the Hennigton Estate tomorrow.”
Kade whistles. “Must be a fancy one if it’s there.”
“The budget was four-hundred-thousand dollars, if that tells you anything.”
He balks. “That’s a joke, right?”
“Not even a little bit.” I slide a finger along the buttons on his shirt. “What are you so dressed up for?”
I didn’t miss the way his Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat at the touch, but his smile was quick and easy. “Had a meeting with the Director of Development and Chapter Operations for Alpha Sigma.”
My eyebrows shoot up. “He came all the way from national headquarters? That doesn’t sound good.”
“It was very good, actually,” he says, grabbing the back of his neck. “They’re so impressed with how we’ve turned the fraternity around, they’re giving us a sixty-thousand-dollar budget for house-expansion.”
I gasp. “Kade! Oh, my God! That’s amazing!”
“He said to put in a pool,” he adds with a laugh. “The brothers are going to flip out.”
“I’m flipping out. This is amazing!”
He nods. “Well, we mostly have Adam to thank.”
“And Jeremy. And you,” I say, pointing a finger into his chest. “You were a big part of it, too. Still are.”
“Yeah.”
I frown. “Why aren’t you doing backflips from excitement right now?”
He blows out a laugh, shaking his head and looking out of the floor-to-ceiling windows behind me. “Jess, I haven’t been capable of being happy for months.”
My stomach sours. “Kade…”
“No, no, don’t say you’re sorry, okay?” He chews his lip. “I don’t want to talk about the summer, or about him.” His nose flares a bit with that word, and then his eyes are on me. “I just want to hear how you are, and talk to you, and fucking hold you in my arms. I just want to know I still have a fighting chance to make you mine. I have to know.”
I was already nodding before he finished, and I climb into his lap, straddling his thighs and wrapping my arms around his neck as I press my mouth to his.
The moment our lips touch, we both shiver, gasping at the sensation of being connected again.
Kade folds his arms around me and pulls me even closer, swallowing my next breath and kissing me like it’s the last time he’ll ever get the chance to.
“I love you,” I whisper, pulling back to look him in the eyes when I say the words.
He nods, brushing my hair from my face. “I love you.”
“Consider the summer over,” I add. “I don’t want to stay away from you any longer.”
“Oh, thank fuck.”
I smile.
“I was actually hoping you would come to the A Sig karaoke event in a couple weeks. You know how big of a deal it is… I really want you there. I need you there.”
“Then I’m there.”
“Really?”
I nod, and when he pulls me in for another kiss, I wonder how I’ve stayed away from him this long.
Or how I could have ever walked away from him in the first place.
“WAIT, SO THE PLEDGE actually streaked through class?” I ask Adam.
“Not only did he strip down naked in the middle of class — a class with almost a hundred students, I might add — but he ran up and down the stairs, his junk just bouncing everywhere.”
“Oh, my God.”
“The poor professor, she’s seventy-four years old. She fainted.”
“She fainted?!”
“His waving willy sent her right to the floor.”
I snort, but cover the sound with my hands in shame. “That’s awful,” I say, but I can’t stop laughing.
“She’s alright, thankfully. But yeah… that’s what I’m dealing with.”
I shake my head. “Well, at least you’re in a cool place. You’ll have a fall! Unlike us here,” I add with a sigh.
Adam chuckles. “I do love it here. But it reminds me of spring break last year.” He pauses. “Makes me miss you even more.”
“Thanksgiving,” I remind him, pressing my fingertips to my laptop screen, right over where his lips are. “And I fully expect you to show me around. We were in the Rockies, but I’ve never been to Boulder. Or Denver, really, other than to fly in and out.”
“I can’t wait,” he says, and his brows fold together with the sentiment.
It’s only been a few weeks since we both left Boston — him to go to his first Alpha Sigma chapter assignment as a Field Executive, and me to come back to Florida for my last semester of college. But after having the whole summer together, it’s like torture, being in different states, living different lives.
Greek: A New Adult College Romance (Palm South University Book 7) Page 3
