by Vivian Payne
“I’m ready.” I heard Natalie’s voice from behind me. I put my cellphone away and turned to look at her.
She was dressed in a tight-fit black shirt, simple jeans, and a pair of low cut Converse. She was beautiful.
“So, dinner first or movie?” I asked as I open the door for her.
“Dinner. I’m starving.” I nodded in agreement and went around to get in my own seat. I buckled my seatbelt and started the engine.
“So, mind if I give a suggestion for dinner or did you make reservations?” Natalie asked as she bit her lower lip. I found out that she had a habit of doing that whenever she was nervous or didn’t know how to ask for something she really wants.
“Reservations can always be canceled, so it’s no big deal.” I offered. I stopped at a red light and turned to give her my attention. “What did you have in mind?” I questioned.
“I want a big juicy hamburger, french fries, and a milkshake,” she said, smiling shyly and blushing a little. I found that cute.
“OK. Let’s find a diner to eat in,’’ I said. Then the diner where we had our first meeting came into my mind. Would it bring bad memories to her because of Jasper?
“We can go to the same diner we went that first time.’’ Natalie suggested, as if reading my mind.
“OK.” I nodded and headed towards the direction of the diner.
“You’re in a good mood. Did anything good happen at work?” she asked, and I smiled at her, shaking my head no.
“Let’s not talk about work. Tonight, I just want to spend time with you,’’ I said and was rewarded with a bright smile.
“You know, before I met you, I never really cared about dates or anything like that. Sometimes, I wondered how the hell did I even made it through life, thinking what I had with Jasper was a relationship, because I don’t even know what that is or what love really is.” She shook her head a few times, as if getting rid of the bad thoughts.
I sighed as I looked for a parking spot. When I found one close enough to the diner, I shut off the engine but didn’t move to get out. Instead, I turned to her and took her hands in mine. “Princess, no one knows what love really is, not until you find the right person and really feel it deep in your bones. The one where you can’t breathe without them. The one that will be there for you in the good times as well as the bad times. The one who will cry with you when you are going through shit. And I’m sorry to say this, but it seems to me that what you and Jasper had was not a love relationship. I think it was more like a selfish friendship, a one-sided friendship where you kept on giving, and he kept on receiving without doing the same thing to you.’’ After my explanation, I leaned forward and pecked her on the lips.
“Isaac, when I wake up and see you, my day has already gotten to a good start. At night, I try to stay up for as long as I can just so that I can be with you, and for a while now, I don’t like saying good night to you and then walk away,” Natalie whispered softly, and I let out the air I didn’t even know I was holding in.
“I think that we are heading in the right direction, Princess.” I said.
“OK, good. Now, how about we go eat? I’m starving,” she said as she opened her own door. I laughed as I get out too. It was nice to see her not timid when it came to food. I was so used to the girls I had dated who always watch what they ate, always looking out for carbs and complaining about gaining weight. Natalie had a good appetite and was not shy about eating in front of me, and I like that.
***
After dinner
“I had a great time,” Natalie said as we went inside the apartment. I closed the door once we where both inside, and then I studied her. She seemed sad.
“What’s wrong?” I questioned her, and she stared at the wall behind me to avoid eye contact. “Princess, please tell me what’s wrong. I thought we had a good time? Now, my ego is taking quite the hit when I see your pretty face with a sad expression.” I told her as I slowly closed the distance between us. Natalie sighed and met my gaze. She smiles and then she looks towards the hall where the bedrooms are.
“Like I said before, I hate saying good night to you, but I’m not ready for anything and it makes me feel like a tease if I ask to sleep with you and not do anything,” she explained, and I chuckled.
“How about I ask you to spend the night in my bed but only for sleeping. It isn’t teasing because I’m inviting you to sleep with me. Kind of like a slumber party. We go to bed, and I’ll hold you until you sleep,” I offered, even though I knew it would be torture to sleep next to her and not do anything sexual. But for her comfort, I will suffer walking around with blue balls.
“OK. I’ll go get ready and meet you in your room, if you’re sure?’’ I nodded at her and watched her smile as she walked away to do her night routine. I went to my bedroom to get myself ready as well, trying to get rid of the hardness I got after thinking about Natalie sleeping in my bed. “You are going to behave. It’s not playtime, and you will stay down.” I berated my hard member as changed into my sleeping clothes.
Chapter 11
Natalie
I was swamped with work.
Granted they were only pro bono, they were still cases. And for me, all cases were important, no matter how little they were.
I told Isaac to go ahead and dance. I kissed him and apologized because I couldn’t see him dance today since I still had to work. He offered to stay with me, but I didn’t let him.
I thought it was cute that he wanted to stay, but I was not going to let him quit his hobby. He was dancing when I first met him, and by God, that boy would continue to dance. Besides, it didn’t bother me a bit. Dancing—whatever type it was—doesn’t make a person a slut.
I worked at home all Saturday night. By 2:00 am, I gave up and went to bed.
The next morning, I woke up still tired and sleepy. But I got out of bed and made my way to the kitchen only to find Isaac, Ian, and Melly standing. I looked at them and smiled dearly.
“What are you guys doing here so early?” I asked them. They stared at me as if I was crazy. Isaac came over to me and wrapped his arms around my waist.
“Princess, it’s 6:00 pm. You slept all day. I called both of them because I was getting worried, but Melly said you were usually like that when you overworked yourself,” he said and kissed me softly.
I smiled at them, especially at my loving boyfriend.
“Awe, my boyfriend was worried about me. That’s why I love you.” I gasped and clamped my hands over my mouth, my eyes wide as saucers. What I said shocked the hell out of me and everyone.
Isaac was looking at me with his mouth wide open. Ian and Melly were surprised as well; they knew I never utter those words casually. Hell, I don’t think I have ever said those words to Jasper through the years we were together. I really didn’t see this coming.
This was a big deal. I stared at the three of them and told them I needed to be alone for a while. I left them standing in the kitchen and went back to my room. I grabbed my iPod and threw some running clothes on. I needed to clear my mind outside this place.
“Hey, I’m going for a run!” I shouted as I rushed to the door, not giving them a chance to say anything.
Thirty minutes passed. I was able to do a couple of laps around the park.
I realized that I did love Isaac. It might have been too early to admit, but I didn’t care.
Isaac was not a rebound because Jasper and I didn’t truly love each other; we were just comfortable with one another.
Hell, I felt relieved when Jasper broke up with me. And I thanked him for that because if it weren’t for him dumping me that day, I never would’ve met Isaac.
I smiled at my realization. I loved Isaac D’Angelo, and I was sure he loved me too. I would give him all the time in the world until he was sure of his feelings for me and wait for him to tell me those lovely words.
I made my way back to the apartment to talk to Isaac, praying my intuition of him being in love with me was right.
I ran faster; I couldn’t wait to get home.
When I got there, I didn’t expect to meet at our doorstep the last person I wanted to see.
I sighed as I got closer to him.
“Jasper, what are you doing here?” He had that evil smirk. I cursed myself for not seeing it before. I had always thought he was a passive, boring everyday guy, and now I was starting to see it clearly.
“Well, Natty, one of my brother’s friends is getting married, so we went out last night,” he chirped, but I cut him in.
“Wonderful. Good story. Let’s catch up some other time because I’m in a hurry right now,” I said very sarcastically. He rolled his eyes at me.
“I’m not yet done, Natty. Did I mention that those friends of mine who are getting married are gay? I guess not. Well, last night, they dragged us to this gay club called Studio 69. Then I remembered it was the same club you and Melly visited the night we broke up.” He paused for a bit. I knew where this was going. I couldn’t breathe; I was in shock.
“Anyways, I was getting ready to call it quits between us officially. But when they announced the star of the night, Mr. Bad Cop, I was surprised to see Mr. D’Angelo himself, shaking his ass and wearing nothing but a G-string while holding his big stick on the side. Now, I didn’t know why, but I recorded it. You know, just to be safe. I bet the clients in his firm don’t know about his side job.” I was speechless, and this asshole didn’t wait for my answer.
“Didn’t think so. What would people say if that video is playing in every single screen all over New York by tomorrow?” Jasper tapped his chin as if pondering for an answer. I knew Isaac would be ruined if the firm found out. His reputation would be tainted, and it would be my fault for bringing Jasper into his life. And I knew that I would have to do anything this bastard would ask me to because I couldn’t risk destroying Isaac’s life. I loved him, and I was ready to make sacrifices for him.
“What do you want?” I hissed at Jasper.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t hear you, Natty,” he asked me, looking smug. I shut my eyes, trying to chase my tears away.
“You can’t tell a single person about Isaac, so I’m asking what do you want in return?” I already had an idea about what he would want from me, but I still hoped he had some sense left in that brain of his.
He laughed before answering me.
“Break up with him and move out from his place tonight. Here’s the key to our apartment. Don’t tell him the real reason because if you do, I’ll post that video tomorrow. And once you move back to our place, we are going to get married in a month,” he ordered, looking at me with a hard stare. I couldn’t help but cry.
“You wanted to break up with me before. I don’t understand why you’re doing this, Jasper. We weren’t good together, so why change your mind now?” I asked desperately. I was about to lose the best thing that’s happened to me.
“I really don’t have an answer to that question. I just know that you moving on that fast was disrespectful to what we had.” He shrugged, and I scoffed at him.
“We never had anything special, and you know it,” I said. Jasper clenched his jaw tightly and seemed to be getting mad.
“I change my mind. Let’s leave it at that.” He snapped.
I sobbed like a little girl, and I wasn’t embarrassed at all.
I was going to lose the love of my life, and it hurt. It upset me, knowing that leaving Isaac would surely devastate him.
I couldn’t help but remember about Isaac’s ex-girlfriend. Maybe it had been so painful that he couldn’t even talk about her, and now, I was going to be that topic that no one would talk about. What was worse was that I still worked at his firm.
However, I loved him too much; that’s why I wanted to protect him. I knew that video would ruin his reputation, and I wasn’t going to let that happen. I shut my eyes and wiped the tears from my eyes.
“You got a deal,” I grumbled to Jasper in between sniffles.
“Good decision. I’ll be waiting at home, dear,” he said mockingly.
He tried to kiss me, but I stepped back. He shrugged and walked away. I calmed myself down before going into the apartment.
When I walked in, Melly, Ian, and Isaac were talking and waiting in the living room.
Once they saw me come in, Isaac rushed to me and hugged me, whispering how worried he was.
Oh my God. I love this man.
“Princess, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to freak out earlier. I should’ve been happy because I love you too. Damn, I’ve been in love with you pretty much since that night I met you,” Isaac confessed. Oh, please, God. Make him stop. Melly and Ian were looking at us as if we were in a soap.
I cleared my throat and started thinking about Jasper—how an asshole he was—and that’s how I was going to act.
“I’m sorry, Isaac. I didn’t mean what I said earlier. I don’t think I love you. I just realized my place is with Jasper. I talked to him, and we both decided to give it another shot. We’re getting back together, so I’m moving back with him tonight,” I said without looking at him, but he surprised me by placing both of his hands on my shoulders.
“No, princess, no. Look at me in the eyes and tell me you’re lying.” He pleaded with his voice full of hurt.
Oh, dear God. Please make this stop. I was breaking inside, but I had to do this for his sake. I wiped any emotions from my face and put on a blank face instead.
“I don’t love you,” I whispered. And with that, Isaac let go of me. I went into my room to pack most of my stuff. Then there was a knock on my door. I hesitated but went to open my door to see Melly standing there, looking pissed.
“What was that, Nat? I know you, and I know you feel something for Isaac.” I was trying to hold my feelings back, but I was so angry at the situation I was in. At Jasper. At me, probably for losing Isaac for good.
“What the hell do you know about me? I know what I’m doing, so stay out of it.” She was the second person I hurt today and could possibly lose too.
Hurt flashed through Melly’s eyes, and I knew I probably had just ended my friendship with her. I turned around so that my back was facing her and she couldn’t see my tears.
“You know what? I’ll stay out of it. Don’t talk to me at all until you get your head out of your ass and realize you’re hurting the people that were there for you.” She snapped at me and walked out the door. I sighed and looked at my luggage. It was probably a good thing that I hadn’t moved the rest of my stuff from the apartment I shared with Jasper.
With that, I walked outside, not looking back and leaving the man that I loved with all my heart behind.
I was going to reunite with the man who’s going to ruin my life forever.
I was walking towards my own hell.
Chapter 12
Isaac
She left, and she said she didn’t love me. What’s wrong with me? Was I unlovable?
Everyone kept telling me how cute and sexy I was. I guess it’s not enough for someone to want to stay with me.
I needed a drink.
“Isaac, she’ll come around,” my little brother said dejectedly.
He was worried about me.
It’d been a week since Natalie left me. That night she left, I took off to stay at my parents’ cabin, living on junk food and alcohol.
Ian managed to find me here. Apparently, he and Melly had been looking for me. I did call my dad and tell him I needed a few days off. He just said okay and didn’t press me for details.
I guess he didn’t tell anyone.
I glanced at my younger brother and smiled at him, still sober.
“Ian, you look like shit,” I said in a gruff voice.
He looked surprised, but then he grinned.
“Well, you would too if you spend all week looking for your older brother.” I felt a little guilty about putting him through this.
“Well, brother, I’m done feeling sorry myself. I give up. I mean, if people only want one-night stands
and nothing serious, I’m in; no more looking for love. I’ve been hurt enough,” I stated while getting off the recliner.
“So, does that mean you’re coming back?” Ian asked me with hope in his eyes. I smiled at him and nodded.
“Yes, Ian. I’m coming back. Hey, where’s Melly?” I questioned him while looking around. It was odd not seeing her around Ian since they were always together.
“She’s at the office. She’s worried about what happened. She thinks there’s more behind all that bullshit Nat told you.” He stopped himself, but I signaled him to continue. I needed to get over it since Natalie still worked for us.
“Okay. Don’t get mad or upset, but Melly and I had been around Nat and Jasper. Never in those college years had we ever heard Natty tell Jasper she loved him. Hell, she even hated it when Jasper tried to call her any pet names. But when you called her babe or princess, she would blush or answer you like it didn’t bother her. She was so different when she was with you. Brother, she does love you. Melly and I think that something is up.” He concluded, and I just stared at him.
“Yeah. Well, she made her decision, and I’m a big boy. Now that I got all this hurt out of my system, I’m going back to work. And this subject is over. Got it?” I dismissed that topic, sounding like a lawyer.
Ian left.
I then took a shower, shaved, and got dressed before going out and hopping on my Harley Davidson.
I was going back to the office.
***
My secretary informed me that the partners and some other lawyers were in the conference room. Apparently, there was a pro bono case that went wrong, and they needed to decide whether or not to suspend the lawyer who screwed up.
And one of us would take over the failed case.
