I shrugged, still trying not to hope. “Well, I’ve got nothing to lose. If it works I’ll be forever grateful; and if it doesn’t, it only means I’ll have to come out of the network normally and have my usual amount of pain. Let me know when you’re ready.”
“Okay, I’ll have to get everybody out of your office. Then I’ll do a countdown and break open the capsule. I won’t be able to say anything after that because I’ll have to hold my breath and leave, too, until the aerosolized trank dissipates. I’ll be as quick as I can.” He scurried down the corridor and disappeared.
I followed slowly, then jittered beside the portal. Oh, please, let this work…
A few minutes later, Spider’s voice spoke from the virtual ceiling. “Are you ready?”
“Yes.”
“On the count of three. One. Two. Three.”
I swam up through murky depths, fighting my way to the surface. A steady beeping sounded next to my head, and I dragged my eyelids open to squint in that direction.
“You’re back!” Spider’s joyful voice coaxed my sluggish gaze in his direction, and I blinked a couple of times to make the two smiling Spiders coalesce into a single one.
“Uh,” I said. “Wha’th fug?”
“It’s all right, Aydan, you’re just waking up from the tranquilizer.” A soft female voice spoke from my other side, and I hauled my heavy head over to focus on an angel. Flawless ivory skin, a cloud of celestial-blonde hair, big blue eyes…
“Hi, Jack,” I mumbled. “Thanksh.” Blinking and squinting, I struggled to sit up and failed. “Dam trank,” I added thickly. “Brain’s work’n bu’ bodysnot w’th’ program yet.”
“Bodysnot?” Spider laughed. “That’s a new one.”
“Body’s… not,” I enunciated with great care. “With… the… program. Yet.”
With nothing to do for the next couple of minutes until my muscles came under my control again, I took stock of my crowded office. In addition to Spider and Jack, two paramedics stood near the door, frowning. The beeping noise came from the heart monitor that was attached to me via several wires, and the headdress of electrodes that belonged to Jack’s brainwave-monitoring system was secured around my forehead.
I lay on an ambulance stretcher in the middle of the room. I was warm and comfortable and, miracle of miracles, I hadn’t peed my pants.
Hallelujah. Although I was definitely going to head for the bathroom as soon as my legs deigned to support me.
Should be any minute now…
I tried to sit up again and was rewarded when my body actually responded.
“Stay on the stretcher,” one of the paramedics instructed, but I shook my head and disentangled myself from the blanket to swing my feet down to the floor.
“I’m fine now,” I said. “You can unhook me and take out the IV line.”
“You’re not fine,” the other paramedic snapped. “You were in a coma.”
“Yeah, but I’m fine now.” I gave Jack a ‘help-me-out-here’ glance. “Dr. Travers knows I’m fine.”
Jack frowned. “My doctorate is in neuroscience, not medicine.” When I scowled at her, she added reluctantly, “But I have seen Aydan experience this before, and she was fine all the other times.” She consulted her instruments. “And her brainwave tracing has returned to normal.”
“See? I’m fine.” I held out the hand with the IV attached to it. “So could you please unhook me? I need to go to the bathroom.” As the paramedic took my hand grudgingly, I said, “Spider, you won’t want to watch this.”
He hurriedly turned his back. “No, I’m feeling queasy just thinking about it.”
“By the way, you’re absolutely brilliant,” I added, hoping to distract him so he wouldn’t faint at the thought of blood. “That didn’t hurt a bit. I want to do it this way every time from now on.”
“You want to be comatose?” The paramedic eyed me with concern.
“Um, no. I was talking about something else,” I said.
No matter how high his security clearance might be, it wasn’t high enough for the truth. Hell, I wasn’t even going to tell Spider and Jack where I’d been.
After several more minutes of wrangling and reassurances, the paramedics produced a waiver for me to sign and departed. Jack disconnected my electronic headdress and I hurried to the bathroom, profoundly grateful for my dry pants and unwilling to take a chance by waiting any longer.
When I returned to my office, Jack fixed me with an accusing frown. “Was that wise?”
“What, peeing? Yes, absolutely.” I gave her my best disarming smile.
“No,” she replied with exaggerated patience. “Sending the paramedics away. By which I deduce that you have no intention of going to the hospital.”
“Well, you said yourself this has happened to me before; and I’ve been fine every other time.”
She sighed. “All we know is that we haven’t been able to pinpoint any anomalies in your brain scans thus far. That doesn’t mean you aren’t incurring hidden damage; nor does it preclude the possibility that this may be the time when you actually develop an observable problem.”
I hid the chill her words caused. “Spoken like a true scientist, but…” I tried my disarming smile again. “I feel fine. Better than usual, actually; thanks to Spider’s idea. My exit through the portal was completely painless. It was wonderful!” My smile widened. “This is going to make my research so much easier!”
“No.” Jack’s tone was implacable. “You are not going to sniff tranquilizer darts every time you come out of the network.”
“But why not?” Realizing I had just whined like a five-year-old, I attempted a mature argument. “I researched the trank pistols when I first started using them, and their safety sheet said the inhaled tranquilizer is short-acting and completely harmless. You wake up after about five minutes, and in another five minutes it’s completely cleared from your bloodstream. The injected trank is the heavy-duty part of the dart.”
Jack gave me a look that made it clear I wasn’t going to win any science arguments with her. “That’s true; but the gaseous tranquilizer’s safety wasn’t tested over repeated usage. There’s no data on what might happen to you physically or cognitively if you inhaled it over and over, day after day.”
I sighed and pretended to capitulate. “Okay, you win. Thank you for coming in on a Sunday to take care of me, Jack. I really appreciate it, but you should head home now. It’s getting late and your kids will be missing you.”
She gave me a radiant smile. “Oh, no; the children are fine. We had just tucked them in when Spider called, and Reggie is home in case they wake up.”
“Wow. He’s really diving into this relationship, isn’t he?” The words popped out of my mouth before I could stop them. “You only announced yesterday that you were together.”
Jack’s eyes sparkled with devilish humour. “The key word being ‘announced’. In reality our relationship has been developing for some time.” Her smile softened. “Reggie loves children, and he’s so good with Brendan and Ivy. And they adore him.”
Spider chuckled. “I can’t imagine Reggie loving anything. He’s terrifying.”
Jack drew herself up, her blue eyes turning glacial. “Reggie’s scarring is a normal result of physical trauma from a catastrophic explosion and extensive burns. It most certainly is not terrifying; and I don’t want to ever hear you say such a thing in front of my children.” Frost formed in the air around her. “Or ever again to anyone, for that matter.”
Spider went white, then beet-red. “Ohmigod!” he stammered. “No, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it that way! I just meant he’s… his personality is terrifying. He scares the bejeebers out of just about everybody at Sirius. Me included. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean…” He trailed off helplessly, his ears purple with mortification.
“Oh.” Jack thawed immediately, and a flush stained her cheeks, too. “I’m sorry, I should have realized you would never say anything so insensitive. I’m just…” She ga
ve him a sheepish look. “Oversensitive about it myself, I suppose. The children were afraid of Reggie because of his appearance at first, and we’ve been working hard to help them understand that disfigurement isn’t anything to fear or shun or ridicule. They’ve absorbed the lesson far better than most adults, so I’m very careful not to let anyone undo that.” She reached out to him. “I’m so sorry. Will you forgive me?”
“Of course.” He squeezed her hand, his flush draining away. “I get it. It’s okay.”
“Well.” Jack gave us a wry smile. “I think I’ll withdraw before I put my foot in my mouth again.” She packed up the metal case that contained her equipment and headed for the door. “Goodnight, Spider; Aydan. And again, please forgive my outburst.”
“No problem,” I said at the same time as Spider said, “It’s fine. Thanks again for coming in.”
She smiled and left with a small wave.
I fell back on the sofa cushions with a long breath. “Whew. Don’t ever rat me out to Jack, okay?”
“I won’t,” Spider said fervently, then paused. A crease formed between his brows. “Wait, what would I have to rat about?”
“Nothing, yet. But she’ll be unbelievably pissed if she finds out I went back into the network again tonight and sniffed tranks to get out painlessly.”
Chapter 13
“What?” Spider’s voice came out in a high-pitched yelp that made me wince and shoot an anxious glance at the doorway in case Jack wasn’t out of earshot yet. “No, you can’t! You were comatose for nearly two hours! Jack would kill me if I let you…” He trailed off, then finished, “Never mind; I’d kill me if I let you go back in there tonight!”
He assumed his sternest expression, which was approximately as intimidating as a newborn puppy growling. “Aydan, you are not allowed to go back into the network tonight.”
With an effort, I not to coo ‘Aw, you’re so cute’. Instead, I hid my gut-dropping fear in a firm decisive voice. “I’m sorry, I know how awful that was for you; but I have to do this tonight. I have a meeting with Nora tomorrow morning that I can’t miss; and I absolutely have to gather intel before then.”
“But…” Spider looked as though he might cry. “What if…” He drew a deep shaky breath and squared his jaw. “Okay. I know it’s your job. I just… I really hate that this is so dangerous for you. What can we do to make it safer this time?”
My heart warmed. “You’re the best.”
“Thanks,” he mumbled. “But if this is what ‘the best’ feels like, I can do without it.” His voice firmed. “So where are you trying to go?”
“Um…”
I wanted to tell him. But I was pretty sure that hacking into one of our allies’ servers was an international incident waiting to happen; and if it ever came to light I didn’t want him caught in the shitstorm.
“I can’t tell you,” I said. “Sorry. But it’s a really secure server and I got totally thrashed.” The thought of trying again chilled my blood, and I shivered. What if I couldn’t rebuild my consciousness this time?
“There has to be another way,” Spider insisted. “Some back door to the server that you haven’t found yet, or…”
Revelation struck, and my mouth fell open.
“What?” Spider demanded. “What did you just think of?”
A slow smile stretched my lips. “You’re brilliant!” I beamed at him. “What would I do without you?”
“Um…” He eyed me uncertainly.
“A back door.” I couldn’t stop grinning. “Why didn’t I think of that?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean…” I stopped, replaying the last horrifying attempt in my mind. “I’ve been brute-forcing my way into servers all this time because I was thinking that I had to breach their firewalls. I’m an idiot! There’s always another way in.”
“Well, not always,” Spider countered cautiously. “If that server is as secure as you say…”
“It’s not. None of them are. That’s what that little calm current was! Ha!”
Spider looked worried, and I hastened to explain. “I got caught up in the usual data storm outside their firewall. The first time you explained it, you said it was probably a proxy server rejecting unauthorized data packets. So it’s this giant cement-mixer of data, and that’s where I got scrambled.”
“Okay…” he said slowly.
“So the proxy server is bouncing back all kinds of traffic that’s trying to come in.” I jabbed a finger at the air for emphasis. “But something has to come out of that server, right? Or they wouldn’t have any internet connection at all.”
“Right…”
I grinned wider. “So I found it. All this time I’ve been trying to push through or surf over that ugly mess, when I should have just been sitting at the edge watching for the little stream of data coming out. Because if something’s coming out, that means there’s a way in!”
“Um…” Spider frowned. “It doesn’t really work that way. But you don’t seem to be bound by the usual laws of network topology anyway, so… if you think it’ll work, it probably will.”
My enthusiasm subsided, overcome by bone-deep weariness. I sighed. “It had better work. Because if it doesn’t, it’s going to be one hell of a long night.”
“Should I, um…” Spider hesitated. “If you go comatose again, do you want me to call Jack and the paramedics?”
“No,” I said hurriedly, flinching at the thought of Jack’s wrath. “I mean, not unless I’ve been unconscious for hours. My heart rate and blood pressure and everything stays normal, doesn’t it? So the paramedics don’t really do anything except stick an IV in my hand and monitor me?”
“That’s right.” Spider gave me an anxious frown. “So far. But what if…”
I held up my palm in a gentle ‘stop’ gesture. “We can ‘what-if’ all night long, but if I haven’t died yet I probably won’t tonight.”
Spider pressed his lips together, but they trembled anyway. “You were dead. Your brainwave tracing was flat. Your heart was still beating, but your… whatever it is that makes you ‘you’… was gone.”
The urge to shudder was strong, but I managed to suppress it. “Right,” I said in the most matter-of-fact tone I could summon. “Because my consciousness was in the internet. My brainwaves went flat because my consciousness lost its anchor to this network, but I wasn’t dead. I was just… away. For a while.”
Spider wrapped skinny arms around himself. “That doesn’t make me feel any better.” He sighed. “We’d better get started before I completely lose my nerve.”
“Okay.” I closed my eyes and stepped into virtual reality before he could voice any more objections that would make me lose my nerve, too.
After we’d done our usual pre-flight check and I had faded into invisibility, I hesitated for a long moment inside the safety of Sirius’s network.
Was this really worth risking my life?
Maybe I should just pretend I wanted to reconcile with Nora, and subtly question her in the guise of ‘catching up’.
Anger vibrated my data bits. Yeah, I could ask questions all day long, and she could lie to me over and over; just like she’d already done.
And if she killed Ian, his death would be on my conscience if I hadn’t done everything I could to investigate.
Not an option.
Before I could change my mind, I dove into the vast tunnels of the internet.
A handful of my original markers still remained, and I found MI5 quickly this time. Of course. Some small cowardly part of me… okay, fine; the giant cowardly majority of me had been hoping I wouldn’t be able to find it at all.
But there it was, its deadly data storm churning up ripples all the way to the tunnel where I hovered fearfully.
Clinging to the data tunnel, I extended delicate tentacles, letting them tumble in the maelstrom. After a few minutes one tentacle-tip found…
There.
That calm little stream. Pulling the rest of my tentac
les into it, I mapped its course and dimensions.
Now, ease into it…
After a brief terrifying bobble I released my hold on the tunnel and slipped into the stream, concentrating on staying in its centre.
Turbulent data churned on all sides. Fighting fear, I concentrated on a ridiculous image of myself as a sperm with a squiggly little tail, wriggling madly upstream toward my goal. Gross; but at least the adolescent part of my mind was snickering instead of screaming.
Ahead I sensed the router port opening and closing, emitting stream after stream of data. If I had been capable of breathing, I would have drawn a deep breath. Closer… closer…
The port opened and suddenly I was through, floating in the relative peace of an internal network.
Well, hello, MI5. You’ve just been screwed.
My anchor to Sirius was only a whisper of sensation, but it was there. My body wasn’t in a coma, and I’d be able to find my way home.
Fortunately I wasn’t capable of actual physical movement, since my victory jig wouldn’t have been pretty.
Settle down. Make this count.
Swallowing my triumph, I surged forward.
Personnel files were my first stop. There, I discovered Nora Taylor’s original interview and the records of her aptitude tests when she had applied for a position as an analyst in 1983.
She had been brilliant. She had no experience at all, but her aptitude tests were nearly off the charts. They had offered her the position the very next day.
Subsequent decades showed her meteoric rise through the organization: Commendation after commendation; raise after raise. She’d started from nothing at the age of forty-four, and built a career that made it clear she deserved her current position as Weapons Director despite her lack of scientific background.
For the first time, I wondered what it must have been like for her as a young woman. Married to my father straight out of high school, she took on the never-ending job of farm wife and did bookkeeping for friends and neighbours as well. Then the miscarriages had started, and when she finally gave birth to me at twenty-five I became her world.
Friends In Spy Places Page 11
